Authors note: Hey guys I'm starting school…..don't really know how often I'll be updating…I'll try my hardest (= Though I'm starting high school so….I don't really know how much work there's going to be…….ewe just thinking about it is horrible….back to Spanish class, math and gym, ewe there all so bad……at least it'll be a bigger school which means more hot guys…..LOL (=
(Ok so I just want to skip some stuff a little bit hear…….let's all pretend Carlisle and Edward were already bailed out LOL don't worry I'm only skipping it to make the story funnier faster)
"Edward I can't believe Charlie made us pay 100,000 dollars bail." Bella whined.
"Yah, they only charged me 200." Carlisle laughed.
"Charlie….hates…me." Edward whined.
"Oh no he doesn't, he just hates you cause you like Bella." Emmett reasoned.
"Then what's Jacob's excuse?" Edward asked.
"I'm awesome so Charlie totally loves me no matter what." Jacob explained.
"I don't think that's true…."
"Hey, he could catch me molesting Bella on his couch and he'd still love me." Jacob argued.
"Oh come on Jake that is so not true." Bella disagreed.
"Oh yah, then how come when I kissed you and you got all pissed off, you told him and he gave me a high five?" Jacob asked.
"Um……" Bella started.
"See no answer."
"Charlie sucks, and that's coming from a vampire." Edward whined.
"Ok…so who's next?" Esme asked changing the subject.
"Ummmm….well Rose was last but, I have an idea on how to make this game more interesting!!!" Emmett cheered.
"Oh god!!!' Edward moaned.
"Hey, wait until you hear it before you knock it!!!!" Emmett yelled.
Everyone looked confused. "What?" Emmett asked.
"Knock it sounds kinda dirty." Jasper laughed.
"Oh come on guys, so childish, you know that's not what I was talking about." Emmett complained.
"Look who's talking." Jasper laughed.
"Oh whatever…back to my idea….I say we start daring more then one person at a time to make it more intense." Emmett said…it was actually a pretty interesting idea.
"You know what…that's a pretty interesting idea." Jasper answered.
"I never thought I'd say this but….Emmett's right." Edward muttered.
"Hey!!!! ……..Well…..I guess that's probably true….." Emmett muttered looking at the floor. "I say we do boys against girls first!!!" Emmett cheered. Everyone seemed to be in agreement.
"Ok…since I was last…I guess girls go first." Rose said…..the boys didn't seem to be in such great agreement now.
"Oh no!!!!"
"I knew this was a stupid idea!!!"
"Why the hell did you listen to Emmett?!?!"
"WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE!!!!!!"
"Relax guys….we haven't even said what you'll be doing yet." Alice smiled…..poor, poor, poor, boys…..they were so dead…….
(Rose's POV)
Alice, Bella, Esme, and I got into a huddle……all of them really didn't need to be hear though…..Bella never had any good ideas and Esme was just a crazy horny mess every time she got into truth or dare……though sometimes that wasn't such a bad thing…….
"Any idea's guys?" I asked looking mostly at Alice….maybe she'd use her craziness for good……after all insanity can sometimes be beneficial…….maybe………
"I say we make them kiss each other!!!" Esme yelled.
"Ok…Esme…you have no say at this point…..your way to horny…." I mumbled flipping my hair….that may have been a little harsh but hey…it's true. "Now….go sit over there...I said pointing to a rock a good distance away.
"Fine….." Esme pouted and slumped, slowly walking over to the bolder.
"Ok…now that crazy's gone any real idea's?" I asked flipping my hair yet again…I couldn't help it….it was impulsive.
"Um……..I don't know." Bella muttered….huh boring girl……I knew she'd never think of anything.
"I think we should make them go to the mall to all buy dresses!!!" Alice laughed.
"Actually…..that's not a bad idea….." I laughed……this could actually be kind of fun…..it was very odd to imagine though…Emmett in a dress…..wow….scary.
"Rose I can see what your thinking and I am not wearing a freaking dress…..i already had to wear that wedding gown……"
"Good…then you have experience….now let's get to that mall." I said getting my car keys.
"Yeah!!!! The mall!!!" Alice yelled rushing to her car.
"Alice were going for the boys….not for you…" I told her….stupid shopaholic…….
*********************************
(At the mall)
"Wait….I'm confused….what are we even doing?" Jacob asked as we got to the door…….
"Were going to pick out dresses for you guys that your going to wear out in public." Alice smiled….if she couldn't shop for herself at least she'd get to pick out stuff for others.
"As if the bikini wasn't horrible enough." Jacob muttered.
"At least my leg's are still waxed from earlier today." Edward muttered.
Rose ignored that comment and kept on walking…when they reached a cute little dress shop they went inside…..
"Ok…..Alice you take Jasper, and Seth, I'll take Edward and Jake…..Esme you get Carlisle and Emmett and Bella you can do Quil." Rose commanded.
"Hey…how come I don't get to do anyone else?" Bella pouted.
"Because…your sense of style sucks." Rose said going into the store…..
(Jake's POV)
Oh Blondie freaking hates me…I'm so dead…so, so dead…..this sucks…this really, really sucks….I thought as I watched her go down each isle looking for the most horrible dress's possible….she stopped at a skin tight scarlet red dress that had two huge holes revealing you're hips on each side (Picture on profile) ….on a girl this would be so sexy but on a guy this was just plain wrong.
Please be for Edward, please, please, please, be for Edward…..I pleated.
"Oh Jacob go try this on." The evil bitch laughed…shit, shit, shit!!!!! This sucks!!!!!!
I went into the dressing room and slipped into my dress….do you know how odd that sounds? It's been a really gay two days………
(Edward's POV)
Rose had made the mongrel try on one of the craziest looking dress's I had ever seen……once you go there there's no way it can get worse….I felt a little worried and yet kind of relieved…..there was nothing in this store worse then that…..I should be just fine.
"Oh Edward…..go try this on." Rosalie said tossing me a very short….practically see threw little pink number (Picture on profile) …..damn…the worry is so, so, back….as if the dress weren't horrid enough it had small holes cut out to make it even more revealing……Rose is such a bitch….what the hell did I ever do to her? She sucks……….
(Jasper's POV)
Alice was acting like a mad woman going from isle to isle looking for the perfect dress……..We had gone threw all the long ones already….I was going to have to wear something short and horrid I just knew it……..
We walked…and walked for nearly twenty minutes until she stopped abruptly…so abruptly that Seth ran into a pole…..poor kid….Though I'm sure that dent in his head will heal fast.
I decided to look away from Seth and instead to focus my attention on my crazed wife. She had set her eyes on a sparkly purple dress (Picture on profile) ….on her it would look so cute…..on me it would look ridiculous…..especially with that length…..it would barely reach the bottom of my ass…..though Seth was shorter then me….Please let it be for Seth-
"Oh Jazzy honey." Alice said with an evil smirk….damn……
"Alice…I can't wear this…and after everything I've done for you…I saved you from that dog- I started to say. She put her hand up to stop me.
"You may have saved me from that dog but you locked me in Wal-Mart and that is absolutely unforgivable." She said handing me the dress. "Now get your ass in that dressing room and put this on!!!" She yelled.
I obeyed her orders….damn Wal-Mart….As I walked in Jacob was coming out….his dress was a little longer then mine but had huge slits revealing way more of him then I ever wanted to see……
"Rose?" I asked. He just nodded, blushed, and made his way outside.
Half way in I saw Edward hiding under a table…..his dress had more holes then Swiss cheese….talk about reviling…….
(Seth's POV)
I saw Jake come out in a crazy looking dress…he looked very upset so being the good person I am I went over to comfort him.
"Hey man you ok?" I asked….I couldn't help but smile though….he looked ridiculous.
"I don't want to talk about it." Jake muttered sitting on one of the stools….or at least trying to sit…..his dress was a little too short….At least I wouldn't end up looking that ridiculous right?
"Oh Seth I found your dress." Alice laughed holding up a peacock looking dress (Picture on profile) …god knows how many birds they had to kill for that thing……and look how stupid it looked…..it was even worse then Jake's……..
"You know Seth….I didn't think you could make me feel better but…..you just did." Jake laughed….
"I'd be carful Jake…..your showing." I laughed going inside….at least my dress wasn't as short as his…..talk about short…..God when I saw Edward I think I puked a little…way too much of him….ewe…that image will haunt me for the rest of my life.
"Shut up Seth." Edward muttered giving me a death glare….only one way to fix his bad mood….. "Oh Rosalie Edward's hiding under the table!!!" I yelled. He looked pissed…. I ran into a changing room before he could get back at me…oh I was so dead but I loved it…..
(Carlisle's POV)
I didn't know which was worse….my stupid horny wife or the fact that Emmett was actually enjoying this shopping trip……
"Oh Esme, can I wear the green one? Please, please can I wear the green one?" He kept asking….Emmett had picked up a lime green polo dress (Picture on Profile) on our way over to the shoes….. to me it was hideous but I guess everyone has there own taste…..
"Uh…I guess Emmett." Esme muttered not paying him much attention…that was not good…this meant she'd be wasting her time on me…..oh God.
"Yeah!! I'm gonna look so hot." Emmett yelled rushing into the dressing room….something was definitely wrong with that boy…..
"Oh this is perfect…SJP wore the same one on the set of Sex in the city!!!" Esme yelled picking up a white and gold knee length tube dress that had a flower bigger then her head sewn onto the side (Picture on profile) …it looked ridiculous……you probably couldn't even see with that big thing all up in your face….I would surly be the next one hitting into a pole…..
(Rosalie's POV)
Jacob was already out and he had gone in just a few seconds before Edward….I just didn't get it…had he escaped? Climbed out a window? I was starting to get worried until I heard Seth yell…. "Oh Rosalie, Edward's hiding under a table." How stupid could he get? I mean table…seriously?
I quickly rushed in to find none other then the idiot brother of mine quivering under a table.
"Oh please Rose, please don't make me go out there?" He whined.
"Oh come on wimp….the dog's got more confidence then you." I muttered…he wouldn't budge……guess it was time for plan B…..
"No!!!!! You are not going to pull me out of hear by my freaking ankle!!!! I will not stand for this!!!!" Edward yelled…people were staring…..
"Well good….if I pull you by your ankles you won't have to stand." I smirked dragging him out of the dressing room.
"Not!!!!! Funny!!!!!!"
"Hey, what did I say about breaking single words into sentences?"
(Bella's POV)
I was looking at the things everyone was picking while Quil was quivering behind me….i needed to out do them all just to show off my abilities.
I decided to approach the front desk for professional help. "Excuse me miss…but do you think you have any more exotic outfits?" I asked…..this was going to be fun.
(Quil's POV)
When I heard exotic I thought stripper……damn it…I was going to be dressed as a freaking striper I just knew it…wait…this is so stupid I wasn't even old enough to get into a strip club and now I was going to be dressed as a freaking stripper….Oh my god…what if she sends me to a strip club….full or men…I better stop thinking this…..
She went in the back room and when she came back she was holding a belly dancer's outfit (Picture on Profile)….well better then a stripper I guess…..
"Hear you go Quily." She laughed……damn I really did not want to have my stomach out……
(Jake's POV)
God this was weird….I was in a dress….Edward looked like a stripper…..Jasper's dress was so itchy he was scratching himself to death, Seth looked like a bird….Quil was a…it's hard to even thing…belly dancer….Carlisle's face was covered up by a flower and to top it all off Emmett was going around the mall asking people if he looked hot…but that wasn't even the worst part……
We were only done with phase one of the dare….we still had to move on to part two…the worst part of all….Alice had suggested we put on a fashion show in the center of the mall……we were being plastered with makeup and had to walk the run way…..no doubt this would end up on YouTube later……
Emmett had volunteered to go strut his stuff first….I swear he was gay or something…he was enjoying this way too much….
When he actually got onto the runway he knew how to walk…..he turned and spun and posed for the camera…he even blew a kiss…..so, so, odd.
(Rose's POV)
Why is my husband acting so gay…this was a horrid idea I just knew it….I couldn't watch any more I went to go hide and pretend I didn't know him….it didn't help when he yelled, "Oh Rose babe wait up!!!" Jumped off the stage, and threw me into his arms….yup that was sure to be in the news paper tomorrow.
(Esme's POV)
My hubby was up next…he looked so good in his dress…the only problem was the flower sticking in his face….he really couldn't see…..as I thought this he stumbled off the stage and fell on a little girl who started screaming.
"Oh gosh I'm so sorry dear" Carlisle said getting off of the little girl…her mom was not happy…she chased him out of the mall……..guess Emmett wasn't the only one getting tazered today…..
(Quil's POV)
I was up after Carlisle…Bella had forced me into doing a belly dance on the runway…..let's just say it wasn't pretty……but I did really shimmy it up out there.
(Jake's POV)
Quil's dance scared me a lot …but it didn't scare me as much as the thought of what would come next…..I had to walk out on a freaking runway…
As I walked out I heard someone say… "Well at least this one's a girl." I was not a girl….I would totally fight that guy if it wasn't for the fact that with each step I took the dress seemed to get higher and higher…..
Twenty seconds later the man corrected himself. "That is definitely not a girl…" He laughed awkwardly to himself and looked away….I tried to pull the dress down but I couldn't….Blondie did this on purpose I just know it!!! Oh next round she was so dead.
(Alice's POV)
The dress I picked out for Jazz was gorgeous…if only he would stop scractching for two seconds…I mean god it could not be that itchy….
As he walked down the runway he was still scratching…..a little more of that and he'd tare the thing to s- too late…..The next thing everyone saw was a very naked man on stage……I quickly had to recover this…..
"Nothing to see hear people!!!" I screamed getting in front of him and running away…..well that sucked………Poor Jazzy…damn it now I'm so, dead…..
(Jasper's POV)
Alice was soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo dead!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Bella's POV)
Well that was a little more of Jazz then I ever needed to see…….now moving on…time to see a whole lot of Edward…..
The crowd waited five minutes but no one came out…..I knew he wouldn't go through with t- before I could finish my though out came Edward in a pink ass length dress walking at none human speeds…..he was in and out in less then thirty seconds….I was barely even able to snap a picture….oh well guess I could always catch it on YouTube later……….
Authors note: OK so I finally updated yeah!!!!! Hope you enjoyed…tell me what you think and don't forget to take out the pictures…trust me you'll die of laughter picturing each guy in each dress….LOL don't forget to tell me what you think and tell you what….if you review I'll have the next chapter up by tomorrow….but only if I get at least ten reviews so you better review LOL love you all (=
