Weeds Or Wildflowers

I've lived enough to know the battle's never through
you pass something down, no matter where or how
will there be weeds or wildflowers affixed upon your bows...

Rick strode down the sidewalk, fists thrust into the pockets of his police uniform, shoulders hunched. Again, the walls of Alexandria were beginning to feel like they were closing in on him, the stupidity of its civilians getting on his last nerve, making him wonder exactly how the hell they'd survived so far. Sasha was now up in the look-out, but even as Rick supposed it was better late than never, it just served to show how much work had to be done to alter Alexandria in order to ensure its survival.

"Here's my hunk," Pamela said, straightening up from where she was posing on the porch, the other women tittering into their glasses. On the porch opposite, Carol sat amongst the smug marrieds and merry widows, deliberately separating themselves from Pamela's group of divorcees and perennial débutantes, society belles who would never see sixteen again. "Yoo-hoo, handsome!" she called, waggling her fingers at Rick, who glanced up, startled.

"Nice uniform," Dana heckled, making the other women wolf-whistle in a chorus of exaggerated appreciation.

Rick recovered himself, putting on his public face, sweeping his audience a mock bow, secretly feeling like a fool, Pamela blowing him a kiss, Rick pretending to catch it and put it into his pocket.

Carol rose to her feet. "I think I have to save Rick from his fan club," she said in an undertone to her own clique, making a ripple of genteel laughter ring around the porch. Smiling, she sashayed down the steps, waving at Tobin as he strode past, just one of the many residents she'd run into on her rounds, Tobin nodding in acknowledgement, ducking his head to hide his burning cheeks.

"I think you've made a hit there," Rick observed as Carol came over.

"How can he resist?" Carol said dryly, fluttering her fingers at Pamela and her posse, who just turned their backs on her, drawing the line in the sand.

"What were you and your girl gang gossipin' about, then?" Rick asked, running his hand down the side of his face. "You all looked like you were plottin' somethin' serious."

"Mashed lima beans, cocoa powder and a little sweetener," Carol reeled off, "a recipe concocted to satisfy the most capricious of appetites during the apocalypse. Full of protein and fills you up."

"Sounds delicious," Rick said darkly. "You heard about Deanna's shin-dig?" he asked abruptly, ramming his fists further into his pockets.

"Deanna issued me a personal invitation," Carol said, patting her hair into place, the pantomime not fooling Rick one whit. "You going?"

"We're all goin'," Rick corrected her, "gotta keep up appearances, remember?"

Carol nodded, secretly relieved he agreed with following her example. "So tonight, then?" she said quietly.

"The armoury's right next to Deanna's," Rick said just as quietly, "I'll back you up."

"Just don't make it obvious," Carol warned, "and don't get distracted by Alexis, okay?"

"Why you still holdin' this grudge against her?" Rick snapped. "What has she ever done to you?"

"I'm not against Alexis," Carol said, exhaling sharply, "I just... I just don't want you getting hurt, okay? I know you and I haven't always seen eye to eye, but I think we've got past all that, haven't we?"

Rick looked at her for a long moment, relenting despite himself. "Yeah, we have," he said softly, patting her shoulder, before turning and heading into the house, reasoning it was best she didn't discover he was going to ask Alexis to Deanna's welcome party.


Alexis took a step back, feeling a quiet sense of satisfaction, she and Aaron exchanging smiles as Daryl awkwardly answered Sam's questions, Deanna, Jessie and Maggie admiring Buttons who was now newly installed in his stall, the horse tossing his head impatiently. Daryl had managed to do what nobody else in Alexandria had been able to, securing and leading Buttons back to Alexandria, Holly opening the gate with wide eyes.

One of the larger houses near the back of Alexandria had a stable attached to its extensive grounds, filled with all the requisite equipment and supplies, all nearly brand new or never used, making Alexis uneasily wonder if they had just brought Buttons back to his old abode, the horse either escaping or his former owner letting him loose as the world fell apart. It would explain why he'd kept running past the gate, remembering his former life, the memory drawing him back time and time again.

"Is Buttons really a boy?" Sam demanded. "He might be a girl. He could be a" -

- "He can be whatever you goddamn want him to be, kid," Daryl growled, before stalking out of the stable, Deanna watching him go, her gaze contemplative.

"Would you mind if I helped out here?" Maggie asked Deanna, making the older woman turn around to face her. "My family used to keep horses before the Turn," she explained, glancing over at Buttons with longing, "I miss it, y'know?"

"Sure," Deanna agreed, "Daryl as well, if he wanted to. It might be a way... to reach him."

"Daryl's a good man," Maggie said quietly, "you just need to give him time."

Deanna nodded, her face thoughtful before turning to Buttons again. "Caring for this creature will help bring the community closer together," she said to Maggie in an undertone, "I want to ensure we use this opportunity to do so."

"Maybe we can organize an outin' for the kids to come here," Maggie suggested, "but under strict supervision of course. Buttons is a bit brisk, so maybe give him some time to settle in before lettin' the kids loose on him."

"Can we see him?" Ron asked from behind them, making everybody glance up, only to see him and Enid standing hand in hand in the doorway.

"Just don't get too close," Jessie warned, drawing Sam back, the little boy's eyes wide with rapt worship as he gazed at the horse.

"You're a big beast, aren't you?" Ron said under his breath, ignoring his mother's warning as he approached the stall, the horse edging away from him, breath coming in abrupt bursts, ears twitching back.

"Hey," Enid snapped, yanking him back by the arm. "Give him some space."

"Okay," Ron said, holding up his hands, rolling his eyes. "I'll give him space. Jeesh, calm down."

Enid just narrowed her eyes at him, Alexis stepping forwards and into the fray. "Yeah, back off, Ron," she said to her nephew, "he's been out there for a while. It's gonna take time for him to get used to being in here."

"I get it," Ron snapped, "so get off my back, Alex. You're not my mother."

Alexis just shook her head at him before turning and leaving, Aaron intercepting Deanna as she made to follow Alexis, wanting to speak to her about Daryl working as a recruiter, having not missed the way Deanna had looked at Daryl, as if she had never seen him before, Aaron wanting to exploit this interest for the benefit of everyone.

As Alexis went past Daryl, he nodded at her, the gesture brusque, almost offhand, Alexis nodding back, sensing something had shifted in the balance between them. Making her way to Aaron and Eric's house, she slowed down at seeing Spencer on the porch, the sight making her heart sink.

"Hey," she said, climbing the porch steps, "what's up?"

"Nothing much," Spencer said, ramming his hands into his pockets, "just thought I'd drop by and say hi."

Alexis just looked at him, reluctantly registering not for the first time how handsome Spencer was, the epitome of the romantic hero, but it was a beauty that left her cold.

"You heard about the party my mom is holding?" Spencer said awkwardly, not liking the way Alexis was looking at him, like he was wasting her time. Normally, people would look at him like he was their every desire come to life, but not Alexis. Yet deep down this was what drew him to Alexis, that she could see past the pretty front.

"Yeah," Alexis said uneasily. Deanna's parties were open to all, but Deanna had an uncomfortable trick of personally inviting individuals, making them feel like they were on some secret VIP list, creating an undercurrent of an 'us and them' atmosphere.

"Are you going, then?" Spencer asked, leaning against the porch railing.

"No."

"Oh," Spencer said, wrongfooted.

"What's it to you?" Alexis asked, shifting from one foot to the other.

"I was going to ask you to come with me to the party," Spencer said, startling Alexis.

There was a long drawn out silence, Alexis glancing down at the ground, Spencer looking at her expectantly, probably waiting for the part where she fell at his feet. "What about Holly?" Alexis said quietly, knowing what his words entailed, what he wanted for and from her, to stop defying Deanna and allow him to bring her back into the fold, uniting Deanna's desires with his own.

"What about Holly?" Spencer snapped. "Me and her are over, Alex. It would never have worked out in the first place. We're too different."

"What, you're a spoilt little rich boy still tied to your mama's apron strings and she's from the projects without a trust fund to her name?" Alexis said abruptly. "None of that matters now, Spencer, and it never did. Holly's nuts about you, and I think you feel the same way, except you haven't got the balls to admit it. That's why you keep going back to her, because you can't let her go."

Spencer exhaled sharply, turning away from Alexis. He didn't care to examine his heart too closely in regards to Holly, but he knew Alexis was right, that Holly meant more to him than he would ever admit. But his mother had expectations, and Holly didn't meet them. Despite Deanna's plans to build an inclusive society, they didn't extend to her own family. Only the best would do for her boys and Holly with her hacked off hair and Brooklyn burr didn't cut it. Alexis might be odd and unpredictable, with a bohemian background, but she had breeding as well as beauty, her family well-educated and cultured, all evidence of bloodlines that put Holly's to shame.

"Just go, Spencer," Alexis said tiredly, "and we'll forget we had this conversation, okay?"


Rick ran up the porch steps, his heart thudding hard in his chest, making him feel like he was back in high school again. With Carl reading a comic book and Judith taking her afternoon nap, Rick had seized the chance to go and speak to Alexis about allowing him to escort her to the party. What would come after that, he didn't know, only knowing he was crossing a line now, finally admitting he was interested in Alexis, the knowledge making him feel like he was standing on the edge of a precipice.

Taking a deep breath, he rapped on the back door, shoulders hunching as he glanced about him, the palms of his hands sweating. Almost immediately, Eric opened the door, looking surprised at seeing Rick on the doorstep.

"Hi," he said slowly, "how can I help you?"

Rick studied Eric, sensing he was expecting judgement over his relationship with Aaron. "I was actually wantin' to speak with Alexis if she's about," he explained, rubbing the back of his neck.

"Sure, she's up in her room," Eric said with a small frown, hesitating before gesturing for Rick to come in. "First door on the left, second floor."

Rick nodded, before going into the kitchen, Eric closing the door behind him. "You have a beautiful home," Rick said in honest admiration as Eric limped ahead, leading the way to the sweeping staircase, various vehicular number-plates lining the walls.

"Thanks," Eric said with an embarrassed smile, relaxing slightly, "I'm a nesting freak. IKEA is my idea of heaven."

Rick cracked a grin before going up the steps, taking two at a time, his heart almost bursting out his chest, wondering at himself over what the hell he was doing. He slowed to a stop outside Alexis's door, leaning his hands on his knees for a brief moment before straightening up, biting the bullet and knocking on her door.

"Come in," Alexis called out, expecting Eric, only to freeze at the sight of Rick standing in the doorway.

"Can I come in?" he asked, his heart sinking at seeing her reaction, whilst already expecting it. "Or do you want me to go?"

"Why are you here?" Alexis asked, swinging her legs over the side of her canopied bed, knocking over a cuddly toy cow.

"I just..." Rick began, before suddenly losing his nerve. "It's okay, I'll just go," he said, just as suddenly turning and making to leave, thinking himself a fool.

"No, wait up," Alexis said, tripping over the cuddly toy cow in her haste to follow him. "What is it?" she said, grabbing his arm, forcing him to face her.

"I – Look, I know you don't like me," Rick said in a rush, feeling the tips of his ears turning red, "that we butt heads, but – but I was – Deanna's party – I was – I wanted – I was goin' to ask you to come with me." He closed his eyes, wishing the floor would swallow him whole, Rick kicking himself for coming here and losing his cool. He had been married, for chrissake, and had two kids, so why was he acting like some hick trying to ask the head cheerleader to prom?

"What, like a date?" Alexis said, looking at him like he was mad.

Rick opened his eyes, staring at her like she'd sprung an extra head.

"Are you asking me out on a date, Rick?" she said impatiently, putting him on the spot, Rick suddenly freezing, feeling like the ground had been ripped out from under his feet. He couldn't do this, and he wouldn't, and with this realisation, he was suddenly in control of himself again.

"No," he said, twisting his wedding ring around his finger, "I just... I just want us to be friends, okay? So I'm askin' you to come with me as a... friend."

Alexis studied him for a long moment, before shrugging her shoulders. "Sure," she said, his words sending a surprisingly disappointed pang through her, "I wasn't going to go, but if you want, I'll come with you."

Rick stared at her, shocked, before recovering himself. "Great," he said, rubbing the back of his neck again, "uh, do I come here or what?"

"What, you want to walk me over to Deanna's?" Alexis asked, amused against her will.

"I could walk you over to my place, and then meet up with my kids and the others," Rick said, trying to keep his cool, "so here, then?"

"Meet me by the back door," Alexis said, before giving him a time. "Be there or be square." And with that, she went back into her room, holding his gaze for a long moment as she turned to close the door behind her, Rick nodding before leaving. But as he reached the bottom of the stairs, it was only for Rick to realise he was smiling.

Remember you traveled through the desert, you traveled to the sea
lookin' out on some horizon, asking what you mean to me
and we all hang around with a free or toiled mind
while all of our branches entwine...