A/N: Hey everyone! Happy weekend! I'll admit, I did only a quick edit, so my apologizes there. But as always, feel free to review and comment and ENJOY!

Taming Your Demons

Gail knew that she was sleeping. She felt like she was sleeping, but she had to admit, she was happy. Chelyn was sitting Indian style on the center cushion of her couch looking peacefully outside to the rain falling from the night sky. They had been like this before; going over cases, or just relaxing with one another. Gail knew that she could relax around Chelyn; tell her pretty much anything. "I think I wanna marry Holly," Gail announced, offering the girl a concoction that she had just created in the kitchen. Chelyn took a sip and grimaced.

"Every liquor in my cabin, huh?" she smiled. "Yeah…marry Holly…" she said taking a larger swallow of the liquor.

Gail drowned her glass. "I can't …you won't be there," she said sadly. "I always thought you would be there…"

"Traci will be there," Chelyn was lying down now. "And you only really need Holly… I only needed Marissa there that one time."

"Marissa…" Gail heard her voice trail off. "Why…why would you…why would you leave her in charge?" she gritted out and she could feel herself beginning to cry. "She won't listen to me…she's going to kill you."

"Nah…I'm probably already dead…" she said solemnly.

"Traci told me to pull you…pull you from the operation…I didn't…"

"Then that was the right call," Chelyn said holding her side weirdly.

"You'd be alive…you'd be okay if I had…you would have worked things out with Elle and you would be alive and fine…"

"I'm probably already alive…" Chelyn turned and smiled at her friend.

And that's when it happened. Gail felt her breath catch and she was grasping for air. Her eyes flung open and it took a moment to adjust to the sunlight flooding the room. Gail could feel herself shaking and she quickly scanned the room for a glass of water. She was having a heart attack…it was definitely a heart attack this time, she convinced herself firmly. This only made the panic set in more firmly and she gasped harder. She gripped the covers around her and closed her eyes, allowing the tears to struggle against her eyelids. Why wouldn't this stop! Stop it! It didn't stop and wouldn't stop for nearly ten minutes of agony.

Her forehead and chest were beaded with sweat and her breath had just settled to its normal pace. Where was she? She felt embarrassed to even have to ask herself. She looked around. Holly's bedroom, she finally decided, swinging her legs to the side of the bed and standing up. Her legs felt unfamiliar and shaky. She picked up her phone, which was plugged into one of Holly's chargers. "2:36 in the afternoon," she murmured to herself. She sat back down and sank backward onto the soft covers. Why couldn't it be a day when she reveled in the fact that she was in Holly's bed?

She felt the air enter the room before she actually heard or saw Holly. She blinked a moment, trying to make sure no tears threaten to fall before fully turning over and looking at Holly. "I was hoping you'd sleep longer," Holly said gently. "But, nearly two hours is better than none, right?" When Gail couldn't answer, Holly changed the subject. "She's stable…has been for the last three hours or so…"

"Who told you…Traci?"

"I talked to the surgeon directly…there are perks to be a nerd," Holly said coming to sit on the bed near Gail.

"Thank you, nerd," Gail said kissing her gently. "Holly, is she going to be okay?" she asked nervously. She really didn't want to know the answer, but the poisonous thought of living without Chelyn Blaise scared her more than not accepting the very real possibility.

"It takes time to know these things, baby…"

"Traci told me not to let her go in…and I ignored her…I was stupid and short-sided…"

"You didn't know this was going to happen, baby…" Holly said pulling Gail close and holding her.

"It's not the point, Holly. I was wrong and Traci was wrong and we were all stupid…but that's not the point. Holly, I've wanted to be a cop all my life; it's all I've ever wanted in my life…to be a cop and you, of course. I don't know if I wanna be a cop anymore, Holly…"

"Baby, you are just upset right now," Holly said rationally. She kissed Gail's forehead. "When this is all over…"

"My best friend could be dead. My mother is going to hate not only me, but Traci if she finds out what really happened…there is no upside to this situation."

Holly didn't want to get her hopes up. She wanted Gail, regardless of what she did for a living, but she couldn't deny the fact that she wanted her girlfriend safe from harm. She had tried desperately to push away her feelings of misgivings about the fact that someone so close and on Gail's team had been seriously injured, but it kept rolling around in her mind. If that was Gail undercover, it could have been her…probably would have been her. Her heart hurt just to think about it. Well, her heart hurt just to think about how terrified Chelyn sounded the entire time on the phone with her. She didn't really know Chelyn, but it was gut-wrenching hearing someone like that.

Holly took a deep breath. "She's going to be fine," Holly said finally. She needed Chelyn to fine just as much as Gail did, and seeing her girlfriend sick with worry made her passionate about Chelyn being okay.

"Even with the decision that Marissa made?" Gail said looking up at Holly. Holly definitely couldn't answer that question.


Marissa had watched the girl be interrogated by Elaine Peck, ignored by Holly and Gail, and finally addressed by Traci. Yes, this was likely the person that Chelyn was dating…according to Marissa's sister, her name was…Ella…Ellen…Elle… Marissa decided nodding at the recognition. It was after the woman was alone, sitting in one of the corners of the ICU waiting room that Marissa finally approached her.

"You work with Chelyn?" Marissa questioned as nonchalantly as possible, smoothing her pencil skirt to sit beside the girl in one of the cramp seats.

"Yeah…I'm Elle," Elle replied weakly. She had cried once, as soon as she knew the extensiveness of Chelyn's injuries, she couldn't help, but cry. She had calmed some, but the thought that this was all her fault still impacted her mind and it was hard not to feel sickened by it.

"Marissa," Marissa tried to smile, but failed miserably.

"You are the ex-wife…" Elle said knowing.

"I can only imagine the stories you've heard," Marissa said crossing her legs easily. After a beat, Marissa looked at the woman. "Were you with her …when this happened?"

"No…I was supposed to have been…maybe this wouldn't have happened…"

"You can't think about it like that," Marissa said softly. Elle looked at her mournfully. "You'll drive yourself crazy like that…if you were here or there…what you could have done differently. With Chelyn, you just have to make a decision and stick with it. She appreciates that…"

"Is that what you did with her medical decision?" Elle didn't want to sound rude, but she didn't know how Marissa could be so calm after she had made a major decision about someone else's life. Especially when that someone was an ex-spouse. Marissa was quiet a second too long, and it made Elle automatically regretful about being so flippant with the woman. "I'm sorry…"

"Chelyn was quiet and broody and difficult to talk to most of the time that we were married. She was …a pain in the ass…but there wasn't anything she wouldn't do save someone's life. To break a case, to protect the public…she would have hated me and her life if I took that option away. I knew that from the second Traci told me the situation, that I would do anything I had to do to make sure she could be a cop. But, until I actually said the words, I didn't think I could do it…that look that Gail gave me…or the tears Traci shed…if she dies, they are going to blame me…"

"She must have known you would have the courage to make her decision and not the one that would make you feel the best," Elle said gently. "I can understand why she left the decisions in your hand."

Marissa grinned even though she truly assumed it would be impossible within these circumstance. She nodded her head knowingly. "I can see why Chelyn is dating you," Marissa exhaled slowly. She stood and headed back over to the nurses station, leaving Elle to figure out if she and Chelyn had ever really been dating in the first place.


"Don't do it, Traci!" Gail said rolling out of bed and placing her feet on the floor. It was just after six in the evening and although she wanted to go back to the hospital, her body, mind and emotions were at odds with one another. Her mind told her that there was nothing she could do, her body craved sleep, but her emotions wouldn't allow either other entity to take over. This was why the entire time Holly had run to work for a few hours, Gail had been back and forth to the bed. She hadn't really slept at all and when she finally called Traci to check in on Chelyn; Traci had hit her with the craziness news she had heard yet.

"I have to tell Elaine the truth," Traci whispered.

"Listen, my mother is focused on nailing my ass to the wall right now; don't shift her focus!" Gail said angrily. There was no reason for everyone to take the fall for this incident.

"This is my fault, Gail!" Traci said sternly. "My family did this to her…my father and uncle sold her out!"

"Okay…by telling my mother that, is it going to make Chelyn a second better?" Gail sighed noisily. "If you want to do something, find your father and uncle…don't hand my mother your badge on a silver platter…because trust me, she isn't playing about this Traci. She wants someone to pay for Chelyn…she loves that kid. If she knows for a second you may have blown Chelyn's cover…"

"I did essentially blow her cover…my father found out and he sold out his daughter, Gail. Like you said, if I had protected my sister half as well as my father protected Theo…she would be fine right now…"

"Are we going to play the blame game or find your uncle and father?" Gail asked hastily. Traci was quiet. "Traci…find your uncle…Joshua North is dead, but your uncle is still running around out there…we need to nail him."

"Okay…I'm going after my father … I need you to make sure that my little sister is fine…"

"Isn't that what Marissa is for?" Gail said bitterly. She didn't even try to hide the fact that she didn't agree with the fact that Marissa had instructed the doctors not to take Chelyn's spleen out. Gail didn't care if Chelyn could never even hold a gun again, not to mention be a cop, as long as she was still alive. Marissa had taken the opposite mindset, feeling that Chelyn wouldn't want to live if she couldn't be a cop.

Traci ignored the barb. "She's stable right now and her blood pressure is returning somewhat. The chance that she will make it through the night is looking probable."

"Is that something we should be happy about?" Gail asked wearily.

"I'm going to find my father…will you come back to the hospital?"

"Of course," there was no hesitation. "Give me an hour…"

"I'll be here until then," Traci said.

"Okay…don't do anything stupid like talk to my mother before then…" Gail said hanging up. She dialed Holly quickly. "Babe…I'm going back to the hospital."

"Hey…okay…did you rest any?" Holly tried to push the worry out of her voice.

"I did, Holly," Gail promised her. "And I'm just going to be there to the end of visiting hours. Traci said Chelyn's blood pressure had recovered some."

"That's great!" Holly said relieved. "Do you want me to stop by the hospital when I finish up here?"

"No…I'll be home soon after you most likely," Gail admitted. "Holly…I love you."

"I love you too, Gail. See you soon."

Gail quickly pulled on some clothes and grabbed her keys and phone, ready to head out of the door. As she opened the door, she was stopped in her tracks. "Mom…" she sighed barely above a whisper. She was surprised, not only that her mother was there, but she really didn't think she knew where Holly lived. However, Elaine Peck seemed to know EVERYTHING, so why was this surprising? "I thought you'd be at the hospital…"

"Gail, I realize that you think I'm against you…but I need to know EXACTLY what happened; where this operation went wrong…" Elaine was tired and she wasn't in the mood to be lied to. "Right now, this looks like Chelyn got made and this was the consequences, but if something else happened…"

Gail bit down on her bottom lip and shrugged. "It seems to be what happened," she cowered. It made her sick to place the blame on Chelyn, but it was safer until she and Traci found Theo and Jason Nash.

Elaine bit down on her bottom lip also in frustration. She moved out of the way and allowed Gail to come into the cool night air. "Are you headed back to the hospital?" Gail only nodded. "And there is nothing that went wrong with the investigation?" Gail shook her head. "That's what Elle said too…nothing went wrong…but that doesn't explain why my best undercover cop is fighting for her life. I'm going to call for a formal investigation," Elaine said wearily, turning to head back to her car.

An internal investigation would surely nail Traci to the wall and Gail couldn't bear to consider the consequences of that situation. "Mom…" she said weakly, "wait…"


"You should go in and sit with her," Marissa suggested. She watched as Elle looked through the glass windows of the ICU.

"You don't wanna go in and sit with her?" Elle countered gently.

"God no…she'll think she went to hell if she wakes up with me in there with her," Marissa laughed. She had pulled her light brown streaked curls into a ponytail and her dark brown eyes sparkled with amusement. Elle could see why she and Chelyn had been together. They even looked like they would be a well suited couple. Marissa was lively, with a soft round face and bright eyes and Chelyn was comical and aloof at times, so they likely balanced one another out perfectly. "She'd be happy to see you…"

"We had a huge fight last night…" Elle began.

"She and I fought every day of our marriage…she gets over everything quickly," Marissa assured her.

"Do you still love her?" Elle blurted out.

"Not the way I used to," Marissa answered quickly. "I do respect her a lot though…she's an amazing person, but I spent every last second we were together worried about something like this. It was enough that she was always sickly…I think she had fourteen colds the first year we were married…but she sought danger. She didn't see how that would get in the way of our future," Marissa said somberly. "I still love her…but not romantically…" she paused and smiled for a moment. "She's a pain in the ass romantically," she confessed. "Or maybe I was …we definitely were together…"

"I don't think I can sit with her…not right now," Elle frowned. Her green eyes traveled to Marissa.

"Okay…I suppose I will," Marissa nodded. "It would be a shame to make her think she wasn't waking up in hell," she chuckled a little and Elle had to admit, she was impressed by her sense of humor even through this heavy situation.

"I'm going to get food…would you like anything?" Elle asked quickly.

"Cafeteria food…maybe a turkey sandwich or something…that would seem safe."

Elle smiled, "Okay," she nodded. "I'll be back in a little while…"

"I'll be in with her…" Marissa smiled also. "Elle…take your time," she said and strangely enough, Elle thought she wasn't just speaking about bring back some dinner.