In that moment it is as if rage is all I know. With my hands squeezing the life out of Coin I feel nothing but pure, blinding hatred. In all my life I've never hated anyone more than I hate her in this moment, not my mother who watch my sister and I starve, not Seneca and his twisted games, not even President Snow, who wanted to take everything from me that he could. It is Coin, the feeble gray haired women beneath me who struggles to breath, her nails digging in to my arms and her legs smacking against the floor. I want her dead, I want to watch the lights leave her eyes, I want to see her body slum and hear the last exhale her body will ever give. I want it more than anything, I want her death. A wicked grin pulls at the corners of my lips as I stare down into her eyes; I've taken lives before, but this kill will be, by far, the sweetest. This will be a moment I will savor for the rest of my life.
I never get to see that blessed instance where life turns to death, however, because Plutarch Havensbee reacts much more quickly than I would have given him credit for. She's almost gone, I can see it in her eyes, but his arms are around my stomach and he's pulling me into the air. I kick and thrash as hard as I can, screaming at the top of my lungs. "Murderer!" I cry over and over again, begging for someone to hear me. "Murderer!" Coin rolls over onto her side, gasping and coughing. Her hands cover the bruises I can already see forming on her neck as she tries to flood her body with the oxygen I deprived her of. For just a moment I meet Coin's eyes and there is nothing in them but pure horror. She knows what this means. I can unmake her, I can destroy her. With this information I can tear apart the foundations of everything she has fought so long and hard to create. As I have always said, if there was anyone Panem loved more than me it was Peeta.
Fear turns to anger, and quickly anger dissolves away and is replaced by resolve. Her lips press together in a thin line as she stands slowly, her hands out at her sides as she tries to maintain her footing. She's obvious dizzy and weak, and while seeing her in this disheveled state brings me a small amount of joy I feel nothing compared to the rapture I would have experienced if she had died by my hand. Coin clears her throat and pushes her graying hair back into place as I fight against the iron-like grip of Plutarch. She straightens her jacket before glaring at me, her hands in fists at her sides. She's trembling, whether from fear or anger, I can't tell. "I think it is time for Miss Everdeen to have an accident, Plutarch." She says in a voice as cold as ice. My eyes widen as I realize what she is saying. "After all, grief pushes people to do unspeakable-" Coin never finished what she was about to say, because in an instant her lips slacken and her eyes roll into the back of her head, just as her body pitches forward. She hits the ground with an extremely pleasing thump, revealing Haymitch standing behind her; shaking his hand with a pained look on his face.
"Damn that woman has a hard head." He curses as he looked at Plutarch, his gray eyes dark and dangerous. "Now, if I were you I'd put the girl down before you join President Coin on the ground." Haymitch hisses, and for a moment Plutarch hesitates.
"Do you realize what you've done, both of you?" He asks, his jowls trembling along with his voice. "You've assaulted the President of Thirteen-"
"Oh shut your fat mouth, Havensbee." Johanna growls, an iron bar gripped tightly in her hands resting against his temple. "Before I show you just how hard a girl from District Seven can swing." Plutarch sputters for a moment before lowering me to the ground. Haymitch darts forward and grabs me, sweeping me behind his back with a careful arm.
"I think it's time we got out of here Mason." Haymitch says in a soft voice, and Johanna lets out a low chuckle that causes all the color to drain from Plutarch's face. .
"Finally!" She breathes before swinging the metal pole with enough force to send Plutarch to the ground. As soon as he is on the ground she drops the bar, kicking away from Coin and Plutarch's unconscious forms. I stare at the bodies for a few seconds, to shocked to even begin to understand what just happened before my eyes. President Coin killed Peeta, maybe not directly but there was no doubt in my mind that she could have done something to stop it from happening. If Wiress and Beetee could hack into the Capitol's broadcasting system surely they could have figured out a way to keep an otherwise healthy man breathing. I had attempted to kill Coin, and if it weren't for Plutarch she would have been dead beneath my hands at this very moment. Coin and Plutarch had been about to kill me, because I could have destroyed the rebellion, I could have destroyed them. Haymitch and Johanna saved me, but how-
"You sure do have a set of lungs on you, kid." Haymitch says with a huff as he grabs onto my arm and pulls me away, moving down a hall that slopes upward towards the surface.
"How did you know-"
"We didn't." Johanna says in a short voice. "I was just telling Haymitch about our… visit today when we heard you screaming. We came as fast as we could." I shake my head for a moment, trying to clear the clutter weeks of silence has left behind. I want to know why he hadn't just come and visited me himself even once in the days since Peeta's death, but the answer is as clear as the bags under his eyes and his sunken cheeks. I wasn't the only person to lose Peeta again, Haymitch lost him too. He hadn't been able to save Peeta not once, but twice, and I don't have to ask him to know how much that must have hurt. I close my eyes for a moment and see Darren, tall and proud and strong. What would it be like if I lost him again? What would it be like to watch him, or Stacy, or Richard, or Evaline, or Bradley, or Lyla, or Grayson fall again? What would it be like if I went through the heart break of not being strong enough to save them twice?
"So, what's the plan, Haymitch?" Johanna asks as we turn a corner, and for a moment I allow myself to wonder just why we haven't seen any Capitol soldiers yet. They're usually crawling the walls of wherever their precious President is. The answer is obvious. President Coin came to see me with only Plutarch because she didn't want anyone else to know, she didn't want there to be a chance of someone over hearing her careless words; she didn't think it was possible that I had some ounce of life left in me that her words would rouse. She thought she had been so clever, but she thought wrong.
"We get out of District Thirteen." I say without provocation. Johanna gives me a startled look, as if she'd completely forgotten I was even there. "We get out and we go to the Capitol. We find Alice and the other tributes, we kill Snow." I say in a voice as hard as stone. "And then we come back here and I send an arrow straight through Coin's heart." I growl, and Johanna just stares at me. For a moment her face is expressionless, but then a small smile tugs at the corners of her lips and she shakes her head, laughing softly.
"I can't wait to hear what that bitch said to you." She says in an amused voice, but I find nothing amusing about what just happened. Somewhere deep down some hideous voice whispers that I should have known. I should have known that Peeta was too good to be real, that there was no way my life could ever be so perfect. I clench my fists at my sides, I should have known he was going to die, I should have known he was going to be taken from me, and I should have known that vicious snake of a woman would have her hands in it. I should have known!
As we wind our way through the labyrinth of District Thirteen my resolve grows. Their Government is no less corrupt than the Capitol. Sure, they don't kill children for fun but something tells me that's only because they don't have enough children to sustain their population let alone watch fight to the death. My breath comes in ragged shallow gulps; all this time I have been telling the people of Panem to take their faith away from the Capitol only to put it in the hands of someone just as bad! I blink rapidly as the realization washes over me, if we want there to be a real and definite change in the world we can't depend on the Capitol or District Thirteen, we have to do it ourselves. Before I know it we're standing in the doorway to Cinna's workshop. As soon as he hears us open the door he stands, turning slowly with eyes half dead. As soon as he seems me, though, he perks up. He takes a few uncertain steps towards me before stopping, his eyes only slightly brighter than they had been before. "Katniss… You're… You're okay?" He asks softly, but there is a look about him as if he's waiting for me to disappear, as if he's seen this before.
"No, I'm not okay." I breathe, and at the sound of my voice his ridged shoulders relax and a small smile touches his face. "We're getting out of here, Cinna. We're getting out now." I hiss and he nods, not even second guessing what I had just said. I look up at him, and though I try to smile it doesn't quite come out. I can always trust Cinna to be there for me, to follow wherever I lead, and while I know he deserves something ten times better than what I am I don't have the strength to send him away.
"What about Finnick and Annie?" Haymitch asks, brushing his graying hair out of his face. "We could use Finnick for this plan of yours-"
"But Annie will slow us down." I turn my eyes towards the dark haired girl, my eye brows narrowed. "I'm not saying we can leave her behind, I'm just saying she's not exactly mentally stable enough for this kind of thing." Johanna finishes. "God knows that they'd do to her if she was left behind, though." For a moment I try to imagine it, I try to imagine the horrors they would put Annie through if the rest of us suddenly disappeared.
"As if you could get Finnick to take a step outside of District Thirteen without her anyways." Cinna says as he takes a firm hold of my hand, and though his touch once given me such comfort and hope I now feel nothing but the pressure of his fingers wrapped around mine. I grip him back, however, because I know it's what he wants me to do and it's nice to have something to do with my hands.
"So is that the plan?" Johanna asks, her eyes wide with excitement. I can tell she's been waiting for this. Johanna isn't the type of girl to sit around and wait for things to happen, I'm quite sure she's been itching for a chance to get out of District Thirteen since she got here. "We find Finnick and Annie and get the hell out of here before they realize-" From a small box on the wall a siren I've never heard before blares, and we all clap our hands over our ears to block out the horrible sound. The halls suddenly swarm with more soldiers than I've ever seen in one place, and though I tense up for a fight they rush right past us as if we aren't even there.
"The president has been attacked." A man with a thick moustache says. "Everyone needs to go back to their quarters and stay there until otherwise instructed." He growls, and I nod quickly. So they've found Coin, but she's obviously not conscious yet, otherwise we would all be at gun point. I send Haymitch a sideways glance; he must have hit her harder than imaginable for her to still be on the ground. We press ourselves against the wall as they all rush by, waiting for a break in the stream of soldiers to make a run for it.
"I need to grab something!" Cinna calls before slipping his hand out of mine and rushing back into his room. I almost call out to him, to tell him it's not important, but he returns only moments later with his work bag under his arm. I should have known he would go back for it; it is his life's work after all. Carefully we inch our way down the hall, and I wonder if my companion's hearts are hammering just as loudly as mine is. When the steady stream of soldiers becomes a light trickle we break into a run towards Finnick and Annie's room, and I thank whatever higher power there is that their quarters are right near where the Hovercrafts are kept.
That excitement is short lived, however, when I realize that none of us know how to fly a Hovercraft. My heart sinks in my chest; we're going to have to make a run for it. I look around at my fellow escapees. These aren't like Johanna's forests, and I doubt Haymitch had been beneath the cover of trees since his own game. Cinna's never been in a wood of any kind and Finnick and Annie aren't used to tree's that don't end in palm fronds. Worry grips my heart, if we have to run they'll catch us, we'll never make it all the way to the Capitol on foot. Not to mention with two powerful groups of people both wanting us dead we don't stand a snow ball's chance in hell of making it out of this alive. Our best option, hell our only option is to steal a Hovercraft and hope that it isn't as hard to fly as it looks.
Just as we reach Finnick and Annie's room I see a copper haired head poking out from the doorway, sea green eyes looking up and down the halls in confusion. When he sees us all rushing towards him, he ducks his head down and lets out an exasperated sigh. "What the hell have you guys done now?" He breathes, and while that would make me laugh at a different time I find I'm not even sure if I remember how to make the sound.
"Change of plans, Fin." Johanna says as she pushes the door open all the way, revealing Annie where she is sitting on the bed watching us, her hands over her ears.
"We're getting out of District Thirteen." Haymitch finishes for her, stepping forward as our unspoken leader. "I'm afraid I've grown rather tired of being sober all the time." He says with a small smirk, and Finnick grins.
"I think a change of scenery could do us all some good." He says as he retreats back into the room and holds his hand out to Annie. "We're going on a trip, Sweetheart." Finnick says, and Annie smiles up at him.
"Are we going home?" There is such hope in her voice I'm very thankful that I don't have to be the one to crush it.
"No, not yet, love. But soon, very soon." He lies as she rests her hand in his and allows him to pull her up. He wraps his arm around her shoulders as she covers her ears once more.
"So, what's the plan?" Finnick yells once we're out in the hall, trying to be heard over the wailing of the Sirens.
"We hijack a hovercraft and get the hell out of here." Cinna says, squeezing my hand where it rests in his. I don't return the motion, but I don't pull away either. Part of me wonders what he will make of my indifference, but it is a quiet and short lived part that is easily snuffed out. A sad smile cover's Finnick's face and he shakes his head.
"I once knew a man who designed and flew Hovercrafts." He says, the look in his eyes tells me he knew the man quite well. Years ago he had opened up to me and told me that President Snow had been whoring him out to whoever could pay his steep prices. "I never forget a secret, I bet I could fly us right out of here." He says confidently, and I feel my own hope returning. Maybe we will be able to make it out of here; maybe there is a chance that we can make it out of this alive!
Just then shouting come from down the hall, loud orders and the stomping of many feet. From the sounds of things I would imagine that Coin just woke up and told the Soldiers who her assailants were, her or Havensbee. "Times up!" Haymitch yells as he turns and tears down the hall, leaving us all behind for just a moment. Without thought we all follow him, rushing as quickly as we can through the sharp and narrow halls. "Hurry!" He cries as he holds open the door to the Hovercraft bay, and we all rush through it one by one.
Once inside Finnick points to an older looking Hovercraft, one off to the side. It looks older than the rest, but I suppose that could be because it is a Capitol model as opposed to one of the newer District Thirteen re-creates. "There!" He yells and we all follow him, watching as he pulls open the back latch and ushers us all inside. The door on the others side of the room opens, and the sound of gunshots meet my ears. The bullets make a high pitches ping sound as they bounce off the bodies of the Hovercrafts, some quite far away and others dangerously close. I am almost inside the belly of the beast, my fear of being shot over riding my fear of Hovercrafts, when there is a burning hot pain in my arm,
I cry out as I fall against Cinna, gripping my arm as blood pools beneath the course fabric of my shirt. As gently as he can he guides me into the hull, seating me down before ripping my shirt off my arm. Once we're all inside Haymitch shut's the door and motions Finnick, who's already in the pilot's seat, to take off. The old Hovercraft shudders and coughs before finally moving with less than half the speed of the new Hovercrafts that zip through the air. Tears blur my vision as I stomp my foot on the ground, my teeth digging into my bottom lip as I grunt out in pain. "The bullet barely grazed you." Cinna says with a sigh of relief. "The cut is long but it's very shallow, you'll be fine." He says as he retrieves a first aid kit from its hiding spot beneath a seat, cleaning my little wound and wrapping it as Cinna flies us out of District Thirteen.
For a while we're all silent, the only sound coming from the hum of the engine and my own grunts and moans. Everyone wants to know what prompted this escape, but I don't quite feel like telling them. My stomach turns into a rock within me, I don't want them to know that Peeta, this Peeta, wasn't the one who had been reaped for the Seventy- Fourth Hunger Games. It is as if I believe that if they know the truth their feelings for Peeta will diminish, their memories of him will be tainted. I bow my head as Cinna ties off the bandage, standing only to seat himself beside me as I stare at my feet.
"So… you gonna tell us what had Coin ready to kill you?" Johanna asks, her elbows rested on her knees. I take a few deep breaths as I cradle my injured arm. It might have been a superficial wound but damn it hurt like hell! I have to tell them, there is no other way. If they are going to help me, if they are going to be willing to follow where I lead, they have to know. They aren't all as faithful as Cinna. I look up slowly, my eyes red but the tears of pain gone.
"President Coin killed Peeta." I begin in a low voice, and they all gasp. I start the story over from the day Peeta died and don't end it until we find ourselves seated where we are now. I tell them everything, leaving out not the smallest detail. I tell it all, I tell it true, and when I am finished I find that I don't feel any better than when I had begun. I still have a horrible weight on my chest and an even heavier weight on my shoulders. For a long time no one says anything as they all fight to understand what I just told them, I can see the conflict raging in their eyes, the same conflict that had torn me apart. Was it worth fighting for the memory of a boy who died four years ago? Was this false Peeta even worth the effort? The answer comes from an unexpected source.
"She'll pay for this." Annie says, her eyes narrowed and her lips scrunched up. "Peeta was a nice boy, she'll pay for this." She repeats, and I can't help but smile.
