Chapter 29

Spencer followed him outside as they walked down the street. They reached a small clearing and Derek stopped and turned to his friend.

"What happened? What did she tell you?" he asked, his eyes still holding a rage tightly controlled.

"Are you angry that she told me?" Reid asked him.

"What?!" Morgan shoved his fists into his pockets. "No, Reid... no. I'm pissed that she's still reliving that shit after all these years... that the bastard still has enough control over her to throw her into a flashback, that's why I am fucking angry..." he paced away slightly and back. "She used to have nightmares, every night, Reid. My mom, my sisters, even I have seen them. John wanted to find the bastard and kill him for every time he had to chase her down while she was in one..."

Spencer shuddered slightly, remembering how she couldn't get warm... "Yeah, I know that feeling. She said John wanted to hunt him down... I misunderstood and thought he'd wanted her to face him..."

Morgan barked out a laugh. "No, Reid, John wasn't a pacifist. He wanted him dead. He thought maybe then she could sleep at night..."

Reid nodded. He could understand that feeling all too well. "So he never found him. She doesn't know where he is..."

Morgan shook his head. "No. The bastard went underground when we finally were able to bring charges against him..."

"Garcia?" Spencer asked, knowing that if anyone could have located him, Penelope would have.

Morgan rolled his eyes. "Scarlett asked her not to look. She truly wants to believe he is dead, Reid."

Spencer looked at his friend. "But..." he watched Derek shift his eyes away.

"But nothing. Baby girl won't break her promise..." he looked a Reid again. "I tried, just to know, to have an idea, but she won't."

"You were there, when she'd come to your house after..." Reid swallowed against the bile in his throat. "You saw her..."

Morgan's eyes took on a look of pain that had Spencer rubbing at his heart. "Yeah. More times than I could count, Reid. We tried to protect her, the best we could, but the system worked against us. My mom was a single mother with three kids of her own to raise. They didn't think it was necessary to remove her from her biological father..."

"Until the physical abuse turned sexual..." Spencer clarified, needing to know.

Derek sucked in a breath. "Yeah. I wasn't home then, when that started. She would never go to the hospital or press charges..."

"She was too ashamed," Reid stated darkly, remembering her scrubbing herself raw after the flashback. "She blamed herself..."

"I suppose," he answered. "I was home that last night... when we finally convinced her to go to the police," he shook his head. "I didn't give her a choice in the end, Reid. I couldn't. He was going to kill her..."

Spencer paced away from Morgan a few feet and took a clarifying breath. He turned back and looked at his friend.

"She never said his name..." he told him.

Derek shook his head. He stepped closer to Reid. "Rowan..." he said quietly.

"Rowan Ryan?" Reid repeated.

Morgan shook his head. "No. She has her mother's last name. The bastard's name is Ian Rowan," he told him. He watched Reid process that information.

"She didn't tell you for a reason, kid. Don't let this become an issue," he warned him as he noticed the dark scowl move across his friend's face. "Her name has always been Katy Scarlett Ryan, so she wasn't hiding anything from you..."

Spencer nodded. "I'm not angry at her Morgan," he said honestly. "I understand why she didn't tell me. She couldn't, not even that night she told me... the memories were like she was re-living everything," he saw Morgan close his eyes against that knowledge. "I had to shake her out of it, and I haven't brought it up since. And I won't..."

Derek sighed deeply. "Does she still have the nightmares?" he asked, concern in his voice.

Reid straightened and looked at his friend. "Not since then. And I am with her- I'd know..."

Morgan nodded. "Then you are doing something right, Reid," he reached over and clasped a hand onto his shoulder. "You've done more than any of us ever could..." he told him.

"I'm trying..." Spencer said softly, looking over to his friend. "All I want is to take care of her and keep her safe..."

"You're doing fine..."

"I hope so," he said quietly and felt his fingers brush against the box in his pocket.

Derek started walking again, heading down the street towards the shoe boutique. He moved alongside Reid trying to think of something to say to change the tenor of the conversation.

"Sometimes it's easy to forget, kid. She makes it easy because she hides it way down deep. As long as you are willing to see both sides of the coin, you'll be able to deal with either day as it comes along."

Spencer lowered his sunglasses from his head down over his eyes and looked ahead into the sun. "I don't want easy. I want her..." he said, not looking at Morgan.

"Crazy girl..." Morgan said with a laugh, using Reid's pet name for his sister.

This time Reid did look over and grinned. "Yeah, something like that..."

"Well, I think you have her," Derek teased as they reached the front of the shop.