29. Recession-Depression

"So did you ask them?" Murdock asked Jean.

Jean plopped down beside him on the couch and said, "Yeah, I asked," she reached into her pocket and pulled out several folded pieces of paper.

"What's that?" Murdock asked.

"You've heard the expression 'take a rain check'?" Jean asked and unfolded the papers to show they were certificates to the grocery store, "That's what they call these, 'want something on sale, we don't have it, we'll get it in after the sale, so get a rain check and get the item after the sale for the sale price'."

"Oh boy," Murdock groaned as he took them from her, "This looks like a ticker tape parade."

"I know," she said, "So we've got rain checks for the bread, the butter, the orange juice, the bologna, the full length hot dogs, and a cube of Coca-Cola."

"Of them all we'll probably get the Coke first," Murdock said, "It says these are only good for up to 10 days from the time you get them, so what happens if the trucks don't come in on time?"

"Then the checks are null and void and we're right back where we started," Jean told him, "Did you tell Hannibal about it?"

"Yeah, I did," Murdock told her, "He said we'd look into it, but all we've found so far is that the trucking company that delivers the groceries is using trucks that are about 10 years old so it's possible their refrigerated units are conking out and the bosses are just too cheap to fix it, even though it would be cheaper than the cost of damages for spoiled merchandise."

"So maybe it's not an outside job," Jean suggested, "Maybe the boss is deliberately trying to run the business into the ground."

"Why would he do that?" Murdock asked.

"Maybe that's the next thing you need to check into," Jean said, "Find out what this guy is, where he is, what he does, if he's got his fingers in the pot on something else, it's not impossible."

"Well whatever it is, Hannibal suggested until we can get a definitive answer, that we just go ahead and shell out a little more money to buy the more expensive food."

"We can't afford it right now," Jean reminded him, "I lost about a week's work when we were all taking turns babysitting Amy, along with a week's paycheck, and you know it's been slow even before that." She rolled her eyes and added, "And that work I've been doing directory canvassing hasn't been doing much good either."

Murdock looked at her and developed a scowl on his face and he said, suddenly and excitedly, "Then we'll use my money, damn it!" He sprang to his feet and the momentum knocked Jean back against the couch and she looked up at him, eyes wide with surprise at his sudden outburst. "Jean this is ridiculous, now you know I've got more than enough money for both of us to live on, there's no reason why we shouldn't use it when we need it."

Jean didn't move from where she was leaned back against the cushions, and she didn't say anything at first, she just looked up at him and reached a hand over and grabbed his to get his attention. He took notice, and calmed down, and sat down beside her, collecting himself, "I'm sorry."

"It's alright," she said, "Besides, we really can't do that either right now, not there anyway."

"Why not?" Murdock asked.

"Because everybody else has been thinking the same thing and since they can't buy what they can afford they've been going for broke and getting everything else," she said, "I don't like taking my business to another store, especially one in another part of the city, but with the way things are going right now it doesn't look like we have a lot of choices. A lot of the stores in the area aren't getting that generic food because of the trucks' problems, so suddenly everybody has to go out of their comfort zone where they've always gotten their groceries from, and hope when they go somewhere else that they have it. I don't mind telling you Murdock, it's getting a little scary."

He looked at her and said nothing, he could tell by looking at her that she wasn't finished yet.

"You remember a while back you got freaked out by that nuclear war movie on TV?" Jean asked. He nodded and she continued, "That doesn't scare me, the part that did was before the missiles hit, when everybody was running around trying to get all the food they could and so the stores didn't have any, that's what scares me because it hits home for me. See, a while back Hannibal asked if they ever had tornadoes where I lived, sure New York gets tornadoes. Oh, not like the people in the middle of the country, in Tornado Alley perhaps, but we still got them. We saw more than a couple of them in my time and I remember whenever we were put in a warning or a watch, everybody would do just that. Everybody rushes out when the threat is imminent and tries to stock up on everything they're going to need if they're stuck in their home, or without power for a week or so. You guys don't really do that here, do you? I know you guys get more earthquakes so it's a given to keep supplies on hand because there's no warning for those…where we were we really didn't get earthquakes, not noticeable ones anyway…so people never felt as urgent a need to stock up in advance, it was always last minute. So I'm used to seeing the shelves empty, whole sections of food just gone, and knowing the shelves at home likely looked the same way…but that was in time of a natural disaster, a statewide emergency, people running around in a panic because something could hit down and destroy their homes. Or...in the winter, it was the same thing when a horrible blizzard was coming and the power could be off for days or weeks. But now people are doing the same thing on a daily basis because for whatever reason those trucks are not getting through to the stores in time. If it's sabotage, if it's deliberate, if it's just rotten luck I don't know, but the same thing's happening here and it scares me. They're always saying we're in a recession, that we're not far off from another Great Depression, and if that happens, everybody's going to go hungry." She snorted and told him, "There won't be any Al Capones opening soup kitchens this time to boost their image, it'll be everybody to themselves."

Murdock nodded sympathetically, "I can understand that, Jean, but it's not going to be forever, in time somebody's going to figure out what the problem is."

"Yeah, maybe…but right now I'm wishing I would've used more of my last few checks for groceries that we could stock away, but, we needed to get the windshield replaced to the car, and we had to get your teeth drilled and filled, show them to me again." Murdock opened his mouth and smiled for her, "That was money well spent, and he smoothed them down nicely…and we had to get the deposit in for the swimming pool if we're going to get it in before summer, and with the way the air conditioner conks out, we're going to need it to keep from frying in a couple months. And that'll be where the next checks go, to either fix that air conditioner or get in another unit that actually works."

Murdock nodded, "So I guess we'll just be eating light the next few days, nothing that hasn't happened before."

"I'll tell you, Murdock," Jean said, "It's not so much us that I'm really worried about, we do have a few things buried in the freezer we can fall back on. But we make a good living and we're having this much trouble getting groceries, think of all the people who don't do as well as we do and have a lot more mouths to feed, particularly young ones."

Murdock nodded again, "It's an ugly truth to face, before this situation gets better gonna be a lot of hungry people around here."

Jean laughed and told him, "I remember one time that the store was selling T-bone steaks, and even when they're on sale they're never a good price, something like $6-7 a pound, and they were big ones, thick ones…I go in and they're $2 a piece, it turns out that somebody in the meat department goofed up and put the price for hamburger on the steaks, and you better believe I bought every last one they had before anybody could catch on to the mistake."

Murdock threw his head back against the cushions and howled in laughter, "Too bad they don't make a habit of doing that, it would really come in handy."

Jean laughed a while more before calming down and replied, "Honestly, who doesn't take advantage of when the cashier makes a mistake? You know, register won't scan something, you tell them the sale price and it's the day after the sale, or it scans the sale price and you don't correct them? And so much stuff is all first come first serve, meat especially, anybody recognizes a good price, they won't wait around for everybody to get a piece, they all stack up as many packs as they can carry and walk out with them," she nodded, "I've done it a few times myself. Staying alive is no cheap business, especially in Los Angeles."

"Well," Murdock said as he took a small notebook pad out of his jacket pocket, "So what all do we have on hand at the moment?"

"Let me think," Jean said, "We're down to half a loaf of bread."

"Uh-huh."

"Quarter pound of bologna."

"Yeah."

"Half a jar of mayonnaise."

"Okay."

Jean leaned back and looked up as she added, "About half a gallon of milk."

"Yeah?"

"Three tea bags and a pound of sugar," Jean added.

Murdock stopped writing and looked at her.

"Iced tea," she said.

"Oh," Murdock said, "Uh…" he looked at her again and asked, "How do you make that?"

"One tea bag, a gallon of water, and one cup of sugar," Jean said, "Half tea, half water, and shake it up…though if things don't pick up soon I guess we can water it down."

"Why? How much can a box of tea bags cost?" Murdock asked.

"Last I checked at the store, they're $5 a box."

Murdock about sent his notepad flying, "$5 a box? Didn't the patriots throw it overboard for that price?"

Jean shrugged, "We can try the generic but I don't know if it'll be any good. Then there's the sugar, it's not on sale this week either, and what's left is about $3 a bag, not the big ones either."

"Alright, we'll worry about that later, so what's on the menu for tonight?" Murdock asked.

Jean looked at the clock and moaned, "Don't have time to thaw that roast in the freezer."

"Hmm," Murdock said, "So I guess it's sandwiches when we get back."

Jean remembered something and told him, "We can't go back tonight, that bug bomb we set off is supposed to last for six hours, that's why Hannibal said we could stay here tonight while he's off breaking in his new room at the house."

"Oh…then I guess it'll be sandwiches here, knowing Hannibal he probably hasn't picked up any groceries lately either," Murdock said.

"Just do me a favor and don't let them on to how bad it is," Jean said, "I know they're family but I don't want them thinking I'm an idiot about this whole thing for not being better prepared on this."

"Hey, the way this recession's going, nobody I know can keep their icebox shelves full, add that to the many times we've had to just pack up and leave because the MPs found us, we don't usually keep more food on hand than for a day or two unless it's foreseeable," Murdock told her.

They got up and went into the kitchen to see what there was. Murdock didn't sound hopeful as he asked Jean, "How do peanut butter sandwiches sound?"

Jean turned her nose up and asked, "Any pickles?'

Murdock checked the fridge, "No."

"I think I'd rather starve," Jean said, "Some things are not worth eating."

From out in the hall they could hear a ruckus of some kind, and they decided to see what was the matter. Murdock had just gotten the door open when Face came charging in and told them, "Shut the door, shut the door!"

Jean remembered that Face had mentioned having a date that night and she inquired, "What's going on, Face, playing hide and seek with your new girlfriend?"

"Nope, I'm just playing 'hide'," Face answered.

Murdock closed the door and asked, "What's the matter, Facey, your date not go so well?"

"Officially it's still on," Face explained, "But I'm ready for it to be over."

"What happened?"

Face groaned as he went over to the couch and collapsed, "Amy set me up on a blind date."

"Uh-oh," Jean and Murdock said as they looked to each other.

Face glared at them as if they'd known and held out on him, but he let it go and said, "She said that this was a great friend of hers, and that we would get along just great, and that I would just love her."

"Will you just get to the point?" Jean asked, "What's the matter with her?"

Face rolled his eyes and groaned, "Oh my God, that woman is a regular 2-ton Tessie, she must weigh close to 300 pounds. And she's got about as much grace and charm of a charging rhino."

"And I'm guessing based on your behavior that she really likes you?" Jean said.

Face groaned again, "That woman is like a magnet, everywhere I've gone tonight she's practically been stuck to me. I never thought I'd get away from her."

"So how did you?" Murdock asked.

At a crosswalk, she went one way and I turned around and ran the other, by the time she noticed I was gone the light had changed and she couldn't follow me."

Murdock checked his watch and noted, "It's barely even time for dinner, what all did you have planned before you actually saw this woman?"

"Oh the usual, a little dinner, a little wine, maybe a little dancing and then…"

"Then back to your place and she can break the bed when she sits on it," Jean said, "I think I'd like to meet this woman."

"Oh too bad, you won't," Face said assuredly, "I lost her but good!"

From where Murdock was standing over near the door, he could hear a voice echoing down the hall calling in a singsong tone, "Oh Templeton!"

"Oh no," Face groaned, "How did she ever find me here?"

Jean and Murdock looked at each other, both wearing the same look of intrigue and curiosity and they decided to see how bad it was for themselves, so Murdock opened the door and called out, "In here, Miss."

And in came a woman who made the floor shake with every step she took. Perhaps she wasn't 300 pounds but she was well over 200, that much was obvious, and Murdock couldn't resist looking her up and down, as well as the oddly patterned dress she was wearing that looked like a holographic puzzle. The woman looked to be about 45 and had a head full of big reddish brown hair that was tied up in a bun, looking like the female equivalence of a silent film's 'heavy', the big, tall, burly men with black beards and mustaches who were the villains and foils to the good guys, who were always much smaller and more timid. They also noticed that she was clutching a large old brown leather purse against her, and it all had the gears turning in Jean's head.

"Templeton, you silly boy," she said as she went over to the petrified young man on the couch, "Did you really think I wouldn't catch up with you?"

"Are you his date, Miss?" Murdock asked.

The woman looked to him and said, "Yes," she grabbed his hand and shook it, and took the rest of him along for the ride, "My name's Marie Frances, how do you do?"

"Fine thanks," Murdock said as he managed to pull away from her, "My name is H.M. Murdock, and that," he pointed to Jean, "Is my…my…"

"I'm Jean Rhodes, we're engaged," she answered. She turned to Face and said, "You didn't tell us that you were dating Marie Frances, what's the matter with you?"

"You know her?" Face asked, but he was drowned out by his 'date' asking Murdock and Jean a similar question on how well they knew him.

"Oh Fa—I mean Templeton is a very good friend of ours," Murdock said, "He and I go back 15 years."

"How marvelous," Marie told him and hit him in the back, harder than she was aware.

"Were you two on your way to dinner by any chance?" Jean asked.

"Yes we were," Marie answered, "I have a table reserved at the Dresden tonight."

Jean looked at Murdock, and he returned the look but it was obvious he didn't get what she did.

"Oh Templeton," Marie said, "Why don't we all double up and go together?"

"What?" Face asked.

"That would be great," Jean said, "We'd love to go."

"We would?" Murdock asked, then repeated it with more certainty after Jean pinched him, "Oh we would…I think."

"Wonderful," Marie said.

"Our car's downstairs," Jean said, "If you'll give us a minute to get ready we can all head over in it."

"That'd be fine," Marie grabbed Face by the arm and said, "Come on, darling, let's let these two get freshened up."

"Thanks a lot, guys," Face groaned on the way out.

Murdock closed the door behind Face and asked Jean, "What's that all about?"

"That woman is a Hollywood cash cow," Jean said, "She backs movies left and right out of her own pocket, right out of that purse she carries around, she can definitely afford to pay for two more dinners tonight, so that solves our problem of what to eat. And the word is when she gets a little tipsy she really spends money like a loon, and she loves wine."

"Well," Murdock started to grin, "Looks like tonight's finally starting to look up."


"I don't care how much money that woman's worth," Face said as they made their way back into the apartment later that night, "I have my limit!"

"And we've finally found out what it is," Jean told him as they came in behind him.

Murdock came in behind her grinning as he clutched two large paper bags in his hands, "Ooh boy, it sure was nice of her to pay for all this food."

"Not nice, lucky, it was lucky she had so much to drink so she bought your 'doggy bag for Billy' story," Jean said.

Murdock put the bags on the coffee table and started pulling everything out: artichoke hearts, cocktail shrimps, lasagna, steak and filet mignon, center cut pork chops, a few baked potatoes, and a rack of lamb that Murdock had taken the courtesy of removing from its rack before packing it away in his makeshift doggie bags, and pieces of a cake that had come from the whole cake Marie had ordered right off the desert tray, and taken the liberty of eating the other half of. Murdock had done a good job of quickly dumping the food into a bag when nobody was looking, earning him some odd stares from the other people at the restaurant who must've thought he had a hollow leg or a tapeworm.

"I still don't know why you guys had to order all that food on top of what you ate at dinner," Face said.

"Come on, Face, we'll probably all die before we ever get back into that restaurant and you know it," Jean said, "Well we will anyway."

"Besides, we got enough food here to make a couple more dinners out of," Murdock added.

"Or, one lunch for B.A. if he finds it first," Jean reminded him, "So don't let him see any of this stuff."

"Right," Murdock said.

Face rolled his eyes and said, "I still don't get it, why did you insist on coming to dinner with us?"

"What, you didn't appreciate the company?" Murdock asked.

"Besides, I know of her, she's put up the money to finance a couple of movies I've worked on, everybody at the studio knows about her," Jean said, "And it's certainly true what they say, once she got through that first bottle of wine she would've bought the whole prime rib if we'd suggested it." She went over to Face and slapped him on the shoulder and added, "And did you see the way everybody was so nice to us during dinner? If Murdock and I had gone in alone they would've kicked us out before we got a table, but they wouldn't dare do anything since we were her guests. That's what I like, I'd like it better if we could get treated like that on our own, but this was nice too."

"There's just one thing I don't get," Murdock said, "How did Amy ever come to know her?"

"I talked to Marie, she said Amy did an article on her a couple years ago," Jean answered, "She still had her phone number."

"Well I still don't get why Amy did that, why would she pair me up with that fat ox?" Face asked.

"Maybe revenge for something you did to her previously?" Jean asked.

Face looked at her curiously and asked, "like what?"

"Well…she is a large woman," Murdock said, "Like a wild animal…animal? …Horses!"

"What?" they asked.

Murdock looked at Face and laughed, "I get it, I get it, Amy's finally getting you back for that trick you got on her in Arizona when we went to save the horses, remember?"

It took Face a few seconds but he finally remembered and he grimaced, "She sticks me with that water buffalo to get back at me for that?"

"For what?" Jean asked.

"I told you about that," Murdock said to her, "Animal byproducts, remember?"

"Could be worse, Face," Jean said as she turned to him, "She could've gone to the circus and rented an elephant."

"I'd rather have the elephant than Marie Frances," Face told them.

"Yeah but then we'd just be getting peanuts out of this," Murdock said, "At least this way we got shrimp and steak to last us until payday, for once your ability to con people benefits us all, and you don't even have to do anything except sit there looking pretty."

"Isn't that what he always does?" Jean asked.

"Ha-ha," Face dryly remarked.

"So," Jean slumped down on the couch beside Murdock, "What do you want to do now?"

"Ooh," Murdock rubbed his stomach, "I ate so much I don't think I can move…sure is a good feeling though."

"Yep," Jean replied, "One that's rare to come by anymore."

Murdock looked to her and started to tell her, "I still say—"

"No," Jean cut him off.

"Well," he looked at her, "Something better happen soon," he put his arm around her and said, "I don't want you getting too thin on me."

She looked to him and replied, "What? And wind up looking like you?" she shook her head, "Forget that."

Murdock chuckled and pulled her closer to him and said, "You know, I had a good time tonight, it got me to thinking."

"About what?" Jean asked.

"About we ought to go out on a second date sometime soon," he said, "Maybe it'll go better the second time around."

"I liked the last one we had just fine," Jean told him.

"I know, but I want to try something different."

"Oh joy, my life's falling apart with Moby Dick chasing after me and you two are being a couple of lovesick puppies," Face groaned.

"Just be glad she doesn't know where you live, Faceman," Murdock replied.