"Damn it!"

Stomping the ground in what could only be described as a childish tantrum, Matou Shinji cursed a variety of things; he cursed Lancer, he cursed Assassin, he cursed Kuzuki, he cursed Rider, but most importantly of all, he cursed Caster.

Of all the people he would personally make sure regretted ever crossing him, she would definitely be the first on the list.

Assassin had been a high-and-mighty jerk. Kuzuki was just an asshole. Rider was more worthless than a sewer rat. Lancer had looked down on him and simply told him to run for his life.

But Caster. She had done something much, much worse. She had actually dared to betray him. Not only that, she had lied to him. She had offered an alliance under the pretence of beating Emiya, but her plan had been a complete disaster; because of whatever that black thing that had erupted from the mountain was, the entire clash at Ryuudou Temple had been thrown into chaos. He had managed to escape because Lancer had gotten bored of fighting Rider, but he was fairly sure no one who stayed could have possibly survived.

But as it turned out, Caster had managed to flee like the coward she was.

"My Assassin was taken out," she had said, that strangely shaped dagger in her hand. "That's why I need a new bodyguard. I'm sure you wouldn't mind giving me your Rider, would you?"

Deep down, a part of him understood. He may not have been a true genius, but he was by no means stupid. A part of him had known Caster would betray him, and had braced himself for that. The only problem was despite that knowledge, he had been unable to stop her in the end.

It would have been fine if he had just been caught off guard. It would have been fine if she had just outsmarted him. But having prepared for her betrayal and still being powerless to stop it made him feel much worse. And in the absence of a scapegoat, all he could do was blame everyone else.

"All of you… looking down on me!" He cursed, slamming a fist into a nearby wall and flinching at the pain. "Argh! I'll make you regret this! I'll… I'll…"

"Nii-san?"

Ah, come to think of it, there's someone I forgot to blame.

"What are you doing out here…?" Matou Sakura asked, genuine concern plastered on her face. Despite it being her fault, she sure looked nonchalant about it all. "It's dangerous out here, so-"

"Of course it's dangerous," Shinji said, a strange smile tugging at his lips. "Do you know why, Sakura?"

"U-um-"

"It's because your Servant was worthless!" Shinji roared. "Your Servant was such a useless piece of shit that she got herself taken away by that bitch! If only you managed to summon a proper Servant, I wouldn't have had to suffer like this!"

With slow steps, he approached Sakura and placed his hands on her shoulders, causing her to jump. Despite her reaction, she made no move to get away; she certainly knew better than that by now.

"Do you know what this means, Sakura?" he said in a dangerously low tone. "This is all your fault. The Matou are now officially out of the Holy Grail War because you were worthless. How are you going to take responsibility for this?"

"… Hah? Why must I clean up your mess, you pathetic cur?"

The force of those words struck him hard, causing Shinji to remove his hands as though he had been electrocuted. Staggering away from his younger sister and falling onto the ground, he struggled to find the right words as his trembling legs betrayed his fear.

"Eh?" Sakura said suddenly, as though she had just woken up from a daydream. Just as suddenly as it had appeared, the foreboding aura had dissipated entirely. "W-what was that…? I-I'm sorry, nii-san! I don't know what came over me-"

The rest of her excuses were cut short by the sharp impact of Shinji's palm against her cheek, leaving a stinging burn on her skin. Despite his shaky legs, Shinji had rose to his feet and hit her the moment she started apologizing, as though it was something akin to reflex for him. However, having stood up too quickly, Shinji staggered back a few steps from the effort, his expression a mixture of anger and confused fear.

"W-who do you think you are, talking back to me like that?!" He stammered, turning to walk back towards the Matou Mansion. "T-the next time you do that, I won't let you off so easily!"

"I-I understand," Sakura replied, but her brother had already walked off, his speed suggesting he was afraid of something. Of all the time she had spent in that household, she had never seen him wear that expression on his face before.

Sakura looked down at her own hands. Normal. She checked her clothes, felt her face. All normal, save for the pain from Shinji's slap. She put a hand to her chest. Her heartbeat was normal as well. Nothing was out of the ordinary, and yet…

Why did I say that? She wondered. I've never said something like that before… But who does he think he is, lording me around?

She froze, her hands over her mouth as though she had just uttered some forbidden curse.

"What on earth was that…?" she muttered.


"Judging by the look on your face, you didn't win."

Leaning against the wall of the Emiya Residence's living room, Lancer spoke those words in an almost offhand manner. Despite that, the implications of his accusation hung ominously in the air between them.

"… No, I lost," Saber replied, her gaze directed at the table before her.

They were, in every meaning of the word, heroes and warriors. For them, pride was something every bit as important as their life, if not more so. In their world, where spilled blood glistened with honour and drawn swords reflected glory, a warrior without pride was nothing more than a ravenous beast; to a noble warrior, having their pride sullied was a punishment worse than death. To fight for one's pride was the obligation of a Heroic Spirit, and quite possibly the only joy permitted of their flawed existence as Servants.

Such had been the air around Saber when Lancer first encountered her. But right now, the Servant before him was not the same warrior as before; even without asking for the details, Lancer could hazard a guess as to what had happened.

Simply put, her pride as a warrior had been trampled over.

"So you survived, but you didn't win," Lancer said. "What, did your opponent take pity on you?"

"No, he was a splendid opponent," Saber lamented. "However, our battle was interrupted by someone before we could trade our final blows, and he fell."

Her fists tightened as she remembered the scene. The shock on Assassin's face as he was impaled by an unknown weapon, the blood that seeped from his lips as they tried to form words that could express his surprise… they were vivid not because of their brutality, but because of their familiarity.

"Ah… Ahh… Do you want to win so much… that you'd trample over my one and only wish…?"

She had seen her share of violence and death. She had braved battlefields that would break the hearts of even the toughest soldiers, and she had emerged victorious from them. But despite her wealth of experience, Saber had been struck speechless by the death of that spearman.

"Let the Grail be cursed! May the wish it grants bring disaster! And when you fall into the searing pits of hell… remember the rage of Diarmuid!"

She had been unable to fulfil her promise to another warrior back then. And now, ten years later, she was still unable to fulfil a similar one to the Nameless Assassin. How many times must this world sink its fangs into her pride before it was satisfied? Could it even be satisfied?

"I see," Lancer replied. "It's a shame, but it can't be helped."

"… Do you intend to just brush it off, Lancer?" Saber asked in a low tone.

"Well, yeah," Lancer replied, his tone casual but his gaze sharp. "Or are you suggesting you intend to somehow turn back time so you can settle your match with him?"

"A match between warriors is a clash of pride and honour," Saber declared. "To not give it its due respect is akin to spitting in the face of chivalry, Lancer."

"And harping on something in the past is chivalry to you?" Lancer countered. "Sorry, but if it's pride you're talking about, mine's already been dragged through the mud, Saber."

Saber started. Taking advantage of her silence, Lancer went on, his gaze not breaking away from hers.

"Hey, Saber. That silver-haired woman who appeared at that temple… you said she was someone you once failed to protect, right?"

"… That's right," Saber replied, almost reluctantly. "Her name was… is Irisviel. I swore to protect her, but she…"

"Then you don't have the time to be moping around, do you?" Lancer challenged. There was something in his eyes that suggested this meant more to him than he was letting on. "If you're a king, you should have this thing where you put duty above all else, right? And now that you have another chance to protect her properly… are you going to just waste it?"

Silence fell in the wake of his words. He knew just as well as Saber did that the Irisviel who had appeared at Ryuudou Temple was not the same person Saber knew, but it mattered little; after all, they had accepted both Illya and Illyasviel to both be proper 'Illyasviel von Einzberns' in their own right. As far as they knew, this woman was every bit the same Irisviel that Saber had met ten years ago.

The same Irisviel who had, in order to fulfil a wish bigger than her, lost her life in the Fourth Holy Grail War.

"… I understand, Lancer," Saber said, fresh determination burning in her irises. "Your words hold true. My apologies."

For a few moments, Lancer did not reply. Despite a voice brimming with confidence, there was still evidently something lurking in the back of Saber's mind. It was something that Lancer understood could not be dispelled by simple words, so he refrained; after all, he was no king. There was no way he could fully empathize with someone whose sword carried an entire nation.

In the end, all he could do was appeal to Saber's warrior half. The burdens she shouldered as a King were weights she would have to deal with on her own.

"Heh, don't worry about it," Lancer replied, returning to his seemingly carefree demeanour. "If you want to thank someone, thank that brat; talking to her made me think a little about stuff like that."

"'That brat'… You refer to Illya?"

"Yeah, that's her," Lancer said, turning his head towards the direction of the guest room.

Even though they could not physically see it, the two Servants cast their gaze towards where Shirou had carried Illya. The girl had been covered in wounds and unconscious since the raid at Ryuudou Temple, with nary a sign of waking up anytime soon. Next to Bazett (who somehow managed to walk back with them on her own), she was the one who had suffered the most damage during the entire event.

"We don't have the time to be sitting around feeling sorry," Lancer said, more to himself than to anyone else. "Not when the kid's tearing herself up to save our asses."


"Bazett-san's asleep," Shirou said as he stepped into the room. "She said she'll be fine after resting up for the night."

"I see. Thank you."

The woman who had spoken uttered those words without once turning to face him. Wet towel in hand, Irisviel spared not a moment for anyone but her daughter, who had been tucked into a futon in the center of the room.

"How is… she doing?" Shirou asked hesitantly.

"She's extremely fatigued," Irisviel replied, her expression unreadable. "She handled too much magical energy at once, and to put it simply… it wore her out."

"That… that can't be all," Miyu, who had been so still and silent that Shirou had not noticed her before, said timidly. Right next to her, Kuro managed a small nod. "Illya protected us from that huge shockwave, so she wasn't hit by anything. There's no way she could have wounds that severe from simple mana exhaustion."

Irisviel sighed as she replaced the towel on Illya's forehead, before turning to face the two girls for the first time since she had appeared out of nowhere. Her gaze was firm as always, but there was no longer any hint of playfulness present anymore.

"You're right," she admitted. "As expected of you, Miyu-chan. I didn't want to worry you since there's nothing we can do, but I suppose that's not going to work out. Mysterious Stick-chan?"

At her words, Ruby wriggled her way out of the covers, hovering over to Irisviel and resting on her shoulder. Even she – the Mystic Code of Love and Justice who could not shut up regardless of the situation – was quiet.

"It's like this," Ruby said. "In order to protect everyone from the shockwaves caused by the collision of Noble Phantasms, Illya-san required access to larger amounts of energy. To accomplish that, Sapphire-chan and I merged ourselves into one Mystic Code, capable of converting parts of the user's entire body into pseudo magic circuits."

"Is something like that even possible?" Miyu asked. "Turning the entire body into a medium for magical energy… That's…"

"Normally, such an act is tantamount to suicide," Sapphire chimed in, peeking out from inside Miyu's hair. "Nee-san and I are already capable of supplying a nearly endless amount of magical energy to our wielders, so the only limiting factor for our output is the user's body and capacity for magecraft. If the output exceeds the user's personal limit, they run the risk of permanently damaging their magic circuits. That's why in order to temporarily exceed that limit, we convert things like muscles and nerves into magic circuits to lower the burden on the user's original circuits, and to allow the user to wield more energy at once. But we cannot control this by ourselves, so we merge in order to do so."

"But to be honest, most of the time it doesn't matter," Ruby added. "Just increasing the output at the risk of destroying one's body is pointless, especially considering the increase in output is usually nothing too special. But in Illya-san's case… she has an exceptional talent for magecraft, so she was able to draw out an unbelievable amount of energy. That ended up causing heavy damage to her muscles and nerves. The signs of internal bleeding you can see are a result of channelling that much power."

"My goodness, this foolish daughter of mine…" Irisviel sighed. Reaching over and stroking Illya's head, she added with a faint smile: "But that's just like you, going to extremes for other people. Now I can't even scold you for being reckless.

"But of course, when you wake up, I'm going to have a fitting punishment ready~"

A chill ran down Shirou's spine. Even whilst unconscious, Illya's body shivered in fear. Miyu looked absolutely petrified.

"But that can wait," Irisviel said, walking over to Kuro and Miyu and pulling them into a tight embrace. "Don't worry; her life's not in any immediate danger. If we just give her some time to rest, she'll be awake soon."

"… I'm sorry," Miyu muttered. "If only I was stronger, Illya wouldn't have had to-"

"No, it's okay," Irisviel shook her head. "That girl of mine tends to forget about herself when it comes to moments like this. She really takes after her father in that regard. If it means those around her are safe, she'll do any number of reckless things."

Releasing them from her hug, Irisviel put on what Shirou thought to be the warmest smile he had ever seen someone make. It was an extremely gentle expression, and yet incredibly reassuring all the same.

"That's why, there's no need for you to blame yourself," she said. "Let's not make Illya wake up to any unhappy faces, okay?"

"… I-I understand," Miyu said, her shaky voice betraying just how much effort she was putting in. For an elementary schoolgirl, the display was nothing short of miraculous.

"… Yeah…" Kuro replied, in a voice that was almost inaudible.

"It seems you have a lot on your mind as well," Irisviel said with a knowing smile. "If you need a listening ear, Mama Iri is here, you know?"

"I know," Kuro replied in the same flat tone. "It's just… is it okay if I talk to Miyu in private for a bit?"

"… I understand," Irisviel replied, getting to her feet. "Then I'll leave Illya to you two for a bit, okay? I needed to talk to Shirou as well, so that works out."

"Me?" Shirou asked. He had been expecting to be filled in at some point in time, but he had not been expecting that moment to come so soon. After all the chaos at Ryuudou Temple, he had expected them to be too preoccupied with other things than to bother explaining things to an outsider like him.

"Yup," Irisviel said cheerily, flashing him a friendly smile. "Judging from your reaction, you don't seem to know, but I'm actually Kiritsugu's wife.

"So, that makes me your mother, Shirou-chan~"


Shirou sat in stunned silence as he tried to come up with something to say. At Irisviel's request, they had moved out of the room, sitting in the darkened corridor overlooking the courtyard.

Come to think of it, this was where Kiritsugu…

"My, this really is a nice house," Irisviel said, sounding like a child with a new toy. "I wish our home was like this."

"So… you're from a parallel world?" Shirou managed. It was, in hindsight, not the best question to ask, but he had no clue what was.

"Yup, I am," Irisviel replied simply. "I'm from the same world as Illya, Kuro and Miyu. And going by your response, I suppose you're already accustomed to that fact?"

"I wouldn't say 'accustomed'," Shirou said hesitantly. "It's more of 'going with the flow' at this point."

"Well, that's definitely a very Shirou-like thing to say," Irisviel giggled. "I guess no matter what world you're in, you'll always be at the mercy of those around you, huh?"

"… Is that what I'm like over there as well?" Shirou asked.

"No, no," Irisviel said. "Our Shirou is much more of a playboy than you are!"

"… What?"

"That boy is quite sinful indeed," Irisviel said, a mischievous and playful smile on her face. "He unknowingly gets girls falling for him, and then is all slow and dense when they make advances on him. He even got his little sister to fall for him, like the eroge protagonist he is. He's like a natural gigolo, you know?"

"… I kind of want to punch alternate me in the face," Shirou said, massaging his temple with one hand.

"Fufufu, you say that, but are you sure you're not the same~?" Irisviel teased. "Maybe you've already had girls falling for you but you haven't realized it yet~?"

"Of course not," Shirou replied hastily. "T-there's no way something like that… I think…"

"In any case, our Shirou is worlds apart from you. Unlike you, he actually knows what it's like to be happy."

The night air was still. The same, playful smile was still on Irisviel's face, but the levity had all but vanished. No, perhaps such a thing had never existed in the first place.

"What… do you mean?"

"When I saw you for the first time, I understood," Irisviel said, her smile fading. "I knew that you were carrying something larger than yourself, and that your mind functioned in a different way from how a normal human's would."

"What do you-"

"Your eyes when you rushed over to Illya and saw her injured," Irisviel cut across him. "Those weren't the eyes of concern or worry. Those were the eyes of someone who has already glimpsed despair, and was reliving it when they saw Illya collapsed. Am I wrong?"

The fires. The empty black canvas stretching out into eternity. The silent screams that died amidst vermillion cackles. The scarlet tongues that clawed at the skies. The scene of carnage and hell returned in that moment with a simple sentence from her, as though called upon by her voice. In that moment, Shirou was the helpless child trapped under rubble again, waiting desperately for someone to save him.

"… Looks like I was right," Irisviel said. "You've not known happiness in any way, and it's probably because of Kiritsugu's death."

"How did you… know about that?" Shirou asked, his voice sounding foreign even to himself.

"You didn't know I was your mother despite being an 'Emiya'," Irisviel replied. "Which means Kiritsugu must have adopted you in my absence. But just as we predicted in our world, there's a Holy Grail War happening right now. If the Grail is active and I'm no longer around, that must mean Kiritsugu failed and the current representative of the Einzberns… is the Illya of this world, correct? There's no way Kiritsugu would have just sat back at let that happen, so he must be dead now."

"B-but this is a parallel world," Shirou countered. "Kiritsugu could have never met you in this-"

"That's not possible," Irisviel said, a bitter smile tugging at her lips. "Ruby-chan told me that there's an Illyasviel von Einzbern in this world as well, and there's no way she could be the child of anyone but Kiritsugu and Irisviel."

"How can you be so sure?"

"Because," Irisviel's smile then was, simply put, dazzling. "Regardless of what world we're in, the only person 'I' will ever love is Emiya Kiritsugu."

Silence followed her bold declaration. Shirou was unsure of how to respond; after all, Kiritsugu had never mentioned anything about having a child or even a wife. He had always avoided talking about his past, and had refused to break that rule until just before he died.

When I was a child, I admired heroes of justice.

That was the only thing he had learned from Kiritsugu about his days before adopting Shirou. In the end, that was just how much Shirou knew about his own father.

"What was… Kiritsugu like in your world?"

"He was weak," Irisviel replied. "He was kind, he was determined, he was loving… but he was weak. He couldn't afford to lose me and risk Illya for the sake of his dream, so he threw it away. He didn't have the strength to give up on me… so he gave up on the world for my sake. That's the kind of weakness he had, that the Emiya Kiritsugu of this world probably never followed through.

"But because of that weakness, I managed to live," Irisviel went on as she looked at the sky. "Because of that weakness, Illya was able to have a proper life. Because of that weakness, our Shirou had a proper family and experienced normal happiness. Even if there are nights where he would curse himself for giving up on the world, he never regretted the family he chose to save. That's the kind of person Kiritsugu is."

"He gave up… on being a hero?" Shirou asked. In his final moments, Kiritsugu had revealed to him that he had given up on those illusions because he was an adult. If the result of him giving up on that was a happy family in Illya's world, why was it so different in Shirou's? If Kiritsugu had given up on those dreams here as well, why was this house's sole occupant Shirou?

As he asked himself those questions, Shirou felt like he understood. The major difference between the two Kiritsugu had been something very simple: one had made the choice of his own free will, and the other had been forced to make that choice. But how was it possible for a simple thing like that to change the world?

In the end, what had the Kiritsugu he knew gone through, to give up on a dream he had pursued at the cost of his loved one's life?

"… Wait, you said you managed to live because of Kiritsugu's choice," Shirou said. "What did you mean by that?"

"I guess you really don't know anything about us," Irisviel said. "But I guess it's okay, since we're family and all. Despite how I look, Shirou, I'm not actually human. I'm a homunculus created through alchemy, meant to serve as the vessel of the Holy Grail."

Shirou felt his lips move, but there was no voice in his throat.

"As long as there's a Holy Grail War, an Einzbern homunculus will serve as the vessel in order to summon the actual Holy Grail into existence," Irisviel explained. "That's my role, and also Illya's role in the next war. It is, simply put, the very reason we were created for."

"Then that means-"

"That is correct," Irisviel nodded. "If this world's Illya was forced to come to Fuyuki, then she must be the vessel this time round. If they were confident enough to make her a Master, she must be an even better vessel than I am. But that won't change the fact that as the war goes on, she will slowly lose her bodily functions and, upon the completion of the ritual, she will cease to exist."

"Isn't there anything that can be done?" Shirou asked, almost instantly.

"Absolutely none," Irisviel said, her tone allowing for no argument. "I apologize if I sound too blunt, but that is what I am; no matter what I say or do, I am but a doll created through magecraft. Even if I can understand and replicate emotion, I cannot feel them. So I can only tell you honestly: there is no saving this world's Illya no matter what you do. It is simply a matter of her body not being built for that sort of function."

Shirou felt his blood run cold. After all that they had been through, he was told that he could not even save a little girl. How could he ever accept something like that?

"Well, there is a small workaround, though," Irisviel said, her expression softening a little. "Since I am also a vessel and also a model made before Illya, I should be able to wrestle some control from her. The Einzberns have something called the 'Dress of Heaven', and if I wear that I should be able to do something about her body. Simply put, I can shift her 'soul' into a new container, one that will enable her to live longer. That will at least buy her some time."

"But then, if you become the vessel in her place, what will happen to you?" Shirou asked, although he could already guess the answer.

"I will die, of course," Irisviel replied simply. "Or rather, I will return to the Grail just as I was supposed to. And before you ask, no," she added as Shirou opened his mouth. "There is no way to save all of us. No matter what you say, no matter how much you deny reality like Illya and Miyu have been doing all this time, this is the absolute truth.

"There is no happy ending here, Shirou. At the end of the day, at least one of us will have to perish. If it can be just me, then I will be happy with that. I came here to save my daughter, and I will willingly trade my life for that."

Even though her words were sad, and even though her eyes reflected a staunch resignation, Shirou could tell her spirit was strong. If it meant saving her daughter, this woman would cross dimensions just to die for her. Even if the Illyasviel in question was not from the same world as she was.

She had not come here prepared to face the possibility of death. She had come here knowing she would die from the beginning. But whether the cause was supposed to be the Grail of this world or not, Shirou had no way of telling.

"… I won't let that happen," Shirou said. "Illya said something like that as well. She won't let anyone die, and she'll save everyone. I'm sure she'd agree with me that we can manage something!"

"I guess if you look at it a certain way, that is true," Irisviel said. "However, Shirou, your words and hers mean very different things. Illya's wish is that of a child's, and she has a very earnest greed of wanting to save everyone. But in the end, even if she puts her life in danger, she does not want to die. That's because she understands that if she dies, those who care about her will be hurt as well. Illya may be greedy in wanting to save everyone, but she also understands what that 'everyone' means. That's why if she was to be in your shoes, she would have said 'I don't want that to happen' instead.

"Shirou, what you want is very different; what you want is not to save 'everyone', but to save 'everyone else'."

An eternity passed as their eyes met. The look in Irisviel's eyes was indecipherable, no matter how much Shirou tried to understand it. Understanding? Pity? Sadness? Emptiness? It was impossible for him to tell the emotion behind those words, behind her eyes.

It was even harder, however, for him to reject her words. Even if he did not understand what they meant.

"I know because your eyes are the same as his," Irisviel said, answering the unasked question within Shirou's throat as she looked away from him. "He always had those eyes back then, all those years ago… Eyes that saw the world, but that was all; you could not tell what kind of person was looking through those eyes, because they did not care about themselves. That is why I cannot accept your words, Shirou. After all, the man I fell in love with was someone who had given up on that."

Standing up from her spot, Irisviel looked at Shirou for one last time before adding:

"Consider this, Shirou: if you really wish to save everyone, there is someone else you have to save first. If you cannot figure out who that is, you will never be able to protect anything."


"What… what are you saying?"

In response to Miyu's shocked expression, Kuro simply walked towards the window.

"I guess you were expecting a kiss, so it can't be helped that I surprised you," Kuro said, not turning to look at her. "So I'll repeat myself just this once, Miyu: I understand now that I can't win. And since our last exchange, I'm confident that Onii- that Shirou can pull off that move, so there's no need for me to be around anymore. Plus, you have Bazett, so you'll be fine."

"You can't be serious, Kuro," Miyu muttered, her weak limbs unable to give chase to a girl mere meters away from her. "Please tell me you're just joking!"

"Well, jokes don't work on you, so there's really no point, is there?" Kuro asked, opening the window and looking back one last time. At her sister, at Miyu, at her 'brother' and mother just outside the door.

At the room that she may never return to ever again.

"I'm going to join that red Archer," she said.

Without waiting for a reply, Kuro leapt out the window and into the night.


I fully expect people to be confused at the Sakura part, due to how long it took for me to update after the Ryuudou Temple part. There's a hint in Chapter 25 – At the End of the Battle if you're lost as to why she would suddenly behave like that.

Also, many thanks to ItsaRandomUsername for helping me with the proofreading again this time!