Hope you enoy! I LOVE Finnick to death *_* And I've always believed him and Johanna were best friends.

Also, the reason I believe Johanna was a prostitute for the Capitol is said by Haymitch.

"I'm surprised they didn't just kill you," I say.

"Oh, no. I was the example. The person to hold up to the young Finnicks and Johannas and Cashmeres. Of what would happen to a victor who caused problems," says Haymitch. Page 172 of Mockingjay.

Also, updates will be every two days now. So you get one today-24th, then 26th, 28th, 30th, 1st, and 3rd etc. I have ALL those chapters already written. As much as I want to release them RIGHT this minute, I can't. I have written them in advance so that I can get some cushion while I do NaNoWriMo for the VERY first time this hear. This way, I can keep writing ahead and write more at leisure on Johanna throughout the month while still doing my NaNo story. I've thought and planned this way in advance so that you don't have to wait a long time for these chapters. So only 2 days apart through Novemeber, possibly to three half way through the month.

But at little bit of a teaser about November 3, 2011. There is a very important chapter coming out that day. It's called "Bury Me" where we will find out what it means. It's got some very sad backstory. My friend, who's previewed all the written chapters, hates me for it-enough that she's still reading captivated, but that she's like I'm not talking to you you're "so mean!"

So let your minds run wild on this heartwrenching and heartbreaking chapter. One thing I can promise is that there's NO Snow vengeance or anything in this chapter. Hope that helps you breathe a little easier!

"I still get nightmares. In fact, I get them so often I should be used to them by now. I'm not. No one ever really gets used to nightmares."
― Mark Z. Danielewski, House of Leaves

Screams awaken me. I'm sure that it's my own with the nightmares plaguing me—bloated, watery body of Riley, blue faced Griffin, and headless Aeon coming at me. But it's not my scream, it's Finnick's.

His head is in his hands, and his shoulders are heaving with the effort to find control. Any thoughts that he might be able to comfort me after my nightmares is gone, he can't even comfort himself. I reach over to him, my hand gentle as it lays over one of the one's hiding his face.

It's odd that I'm comfortable with him, here in my underwear. It should be awkward, he's not that much older than me—just eighteen, only two years older. But there's nothing sexual in the way I wrap my arms around him and press my body close. It's the only comfort I can offer him—the assurance that someone is living through the same thing as he is. I don't know what has happened to him entirely, I vaguely remember his game in the haze of my brother's death.

Four years later, and he still goes to pieces in the middle of the night. This is what I have to look forward to. My tears mix with his, and slide down his skin. We both hold on, both still hoping for comfort from the other. But we're both inconsolable. We are both clinging to a fellow shipwrecked victim, hoping the other will keep us afloat. We are both holding on for dear life.

After sometime, we part and lay there staring at the ceiling. Finnick's voice is kind, but sad, "It's nice to be in a bed once without expecting sex."

"I've only been a victor for a few days, and I know what you mean." I brush back my hair, trying to connect imaginary patterns on the ceiling. "Have you thought about ending it?" I say it bluntly.

He laughs lightly, "You're something else." The laughter stops as he begins to speak again, "Yeah, I have. I think we all have or all do. But…there's too many I love still."

"But if you had no one?" I turn my head to look at him.

He's facing me now, and I'm looking into his brilliant green eyes. "I don't know. Maybe…I'd want to live anyways. Look at Haymitch, he has no one. He's free, if you want to call it that. I've hardly ever seen him sober." Finnick turns on his side to look at me. "Are you?"

"If I thought it'd keep my family safe, I would." I sigh and turn toward him too. "But they can't live without me. My grandmother's old, I'm the one who works—worked."

"Won't have to worry about that any more," Finnick laughs before he looks at me serious. "Johanna," he tilts my chin to look me directly in the eye. "Don't leave me alone. It's nice to have someone who understands."

"Doubt you'll ever be alone, Finnick." I smirk at him, "But sure, I won't leave you. Who else would tell you the truth no matter what?"

"Figured you'd be good for it. Besides, I plan on being happy one day."

"Oh really?" I lift an eyebrow.

"Yeah, but I'm not telling. Got me in bed already, can't have all my secrets at once." Finnick reaches out a hand to put on my waist and his eyes look deep into mine again.

I realize that he's more like me than I could have imagined. He's playing a game, he's being who he's expected to be. He's looking into my eyes, trying to tell me something. It's then I realize what he means, he may be being used but he's getting something too—secrets.

I try to think of what to say back to him, without anyone knowing if they hear. "Maybe I have some secrets, too." Because, I realize the more I know the better. I don't know what secrets Finnick knows, but I know that he's trying to tell me that they're important to have, to find out. Keep anything you love or care about locked away, but find out what others are trying to keep safe from you. They're not from the Districts like us, they don't know what can happen with loose lips.

"I bet you do," Finnick closes his eyes. "Get some sleep, Johanna. Tomorrow's your big day. Then you'll get to go home. But I'm only ever a phone call away."

I lay there for a long time, before sleep overtakes me. Who'd have thought the person who understood what I meant without my saying the words would be Finnick Odair?