"Here you go." I dump the stuff in our hospital room. I was relieved we had managed to get a private one considering this was past the due date because otherwise Carla would have been fuming more than she already was.
"I probably spend more time here than I do in the pub." She narrows her eyes, observing the rather plain room carefully.
"Well I think that would be hard." I tell her. "I need to go and get the ball from the car, will you be alright?"
"Suppose." She shrugs. "Just don't take too long."
"Five minutes tops." I promise, kissing her before leaving.
5:55pm
"Ok, your blood pressure looks fine as does your baby." The midwife smiles, checking the monitor. "You've got a while to wait yet so I suggest you find something to do to pass the time."
"Oh well I'll get my colouring book out then shall I?" She rolls her eyes but the midwife just laughs, clearly used to it. "Am I allowed to eat anything?"
"Uh..." She contemplates. "I'll allow you dry foods for now, best to get it consumed as early on as possible. But if you will be requiring drugs you won't be able to eat past that point."
"I have some crackers if you want them?" I unpack the bag and Carla nods.
"I'll leave you to it." The midwife smiles. "Let me know if there's anything you need."
"Here you go." I open the packet and place them on the table as she takes a cracker and nibbles on it. "Small snacks remember? Don't go eating them all at once."
"Yes Nicholas." She replies. I was pleased that she was in a relatively good mood, although I knew this wouldn't last long...
6:36pm
"Uhhhhhhh..." She mutters, bouncing herself up and down on her ball as she leans up against the window. I keep an eye on her over the newspaper I'm reading.
"Breathing techniques remember?" I prompt her, thinking it best to leave her to her own devices unless she wanted me.
"When do I get this flaming epidural?" She asks, after the contraction. She was being surprisingly mature about this whole thing, which I was soaking up gratefully.
"You've just been given that." I point to the instrument she was holding that provides gas and air. "You're hardly even using it."
"Where's the water?" She questions and I bring it over to her, taking the liberty of raising it to her lips because she had one hand on her tummy and the other was holding her pain relief equipment.
"Ok?" I confirm and she nods, so I pull it away, placing it down next to her. I stroke her hair a few times and she lets out a long sigh. "Michelle said she's gonna come up in a bit. I said she could pop in to see you if it's ok with you."
"As long as it is at a relevant time." She mumbles and I laugh before bending down to kiss her on the forehead and walking back to my seat.
"Should have told her to make an appointment then shouldn't I?" I smirk and she closes her eyes, leaning her head back against the wall.
7:18pm
"There's a couple out there with a bag of chips." Carla is observing the outside world from the window, which I'm glad we have because it's providing a lot of entertainment for her. "Lucky... They're not going through this right now..."
"Calm." I sigh, going over to her to see what she was looking at. "There's a mother with a little girl there." I point out, to the opposite side of the street. "That'll be you soon."
"Yeah we'll see." She mutters. "People can't see me through these things right?"
"Windows? No course not." I nudge her and she gives me a withering look. "They're one way, so no they can't."
"See, that wasn't so hard to answer was it?" She questions before exhaling sharply again, leaning against the wall to her left hand side.
"Ow, no." She places a hand on her tummy.
"Breathe." I remind her.
"You know, saying 'breathe' to me doesn't really help?" She snaps, letting out a low groan, swaying gently.
"If it's any consolation I do think you're doing really well." I tell her.
"Wow, thanks." She closes her eyes, taking long breaths out. "Mmmm..."
"Alright?" I check as she opens her eyes again, before covering her face with her hand.
"Ball." She points to it and I bring it over, placing it by her feet as she sits back down on it. She already looks tired, I was hoping they would give her the epidural soon so that she could rest.
"Do you want a pillow?" I ask. "You can rest it behind your head?"
"Mm." She nods and I unstrap one from the pile I had brought with us. I go back over to her and tilt her head forward slightly to place it gently behind it.
"That ok?" I check and she gives me a thumbs up which makes me laugh.
7:43pm
"How are we doing in here?" The midwife enters, a clipboard in her arms as she goes to check the monitor. "Everything's looking ok, you feeling alright Carla?"
"As alright as I'm supposed to be." She tries a weak smile.
"When can she have the epidural?" I insert but Carla cuts me off.
"No." She stops me. "I don't want one."
"...What?" I frown at her.
"I want to do it without." She argues and my heart melts. She was serious about this; she wanted to be strong and prove she could do it.
"Ok." I smile. "If that's what you want."
"You can always change your mind anyway." She informs us before leaving again. "Feel free to give me a shout whenever."
"Thank you." Carla says and I wait until the midwife is gone before I go over and kiss her. "What's that for?"
"Because you're amazing and I love you." I tell her and she looks slightly taken aback.
"Steady on." She grins and her face suddenly falls as another contraction comes along.
"For God's sake..." She mutters, reaching out for my hand and squeezing it tightly. I brush the hair out of her face as she tips her head forward, letting out a long groan. "Ok yeah I hate this."
"You're doing great." I assure her and she shakes her head quickly. "You are!" I laugh and she looks up to kiss me quickly before tipping her head forwards again. She exhales sharply, tightening her grip on my hand which I didn't mind.
"Mmm..." She mumbles, breathing in again.
"Remember what they taught us at those classes?" I remind her and she nods, letting a long continuous breath out as the contraction ends. She lets go of my hand and I grab the water bottle. "Well done."
"Thank you." She takes the bottle from me gratefully, taking a long gulp from it.
"I'm gonna go fill this up ok?" I ask, noticing the lack of liquid left inside and she nods, appreciatively. "There's a water dispenser just down this corridor."
I kiss her on the forehead before leaving the room, finding my way down the corridor.
"Nick?" I hear a familiar voice behind me and turn to see Michelle and Steve heading up an opposing corridor.
"Hi!" I greet, bending down to fill up the bottle.
"How is she?" She asks, concerned.
"She's doing absolutely amazingly." I tell them the truth, removing the bottle from the pump. "Couldn't have asked for anything more from her. I think she's tired but embracing it."
"Ah, will she mind visitors?" Michelle questions, excitedly.
"I'm sure she'd love to see you." I smile, follow me. I lead them back up the corridor and peer round the door to the room, noticing that Carla was lying on her side now, on top of the covers on the bed. "I've brought visitors."
"Hello." Carla smiles warmly.
"Hi!" Michelle greets, going to bend down and kiss her on the cheek. "Oh babe, Nick says you're doing really well."
"Yeah well I should hope so." She scoffs and I go back to sitting in my seat. "I just have to keep thinking about the end you know? That's what's getting me through."
