A/N: I'm really excited to write this chapter. Tell me how you think I did!
Chapter 38-The Memories
I turn my head to look at the girl. Is she kidding? What is wrong with our guards? How is she still alive?
I draw my gun. It's time to end this, to end her.
"Drop your weapon," I tell her.
"Tobias, you're in a simulation."
I steady my aim. "Drop your weapon or I'll fire."
She bends over.
"Drop your weapon!"
"I did," She says, and I lower my eyes to the ground just long enough to make sure she wasn't lying.
She wasn't.
I have to kill her. She's causing too much trouble. She's a threat.
She launches herself at me so suddenly that I don't have time to pull the trigger. Her fingers wrap around my wrist.
She's weak and small. I should have thrown her to the ground.
I would have, but suddenly fire raced from my wrist and up my arm. My muscles twitched in response to the unexpected flames and I pulled the trigger. She ducks and I miss. My arm is burning. What is wrong with his girl? She's undefeatable and she's burning me just by touching me!
She swings up and kicks me in the ribs. I gasp at the blow as the fire suddenly burns hotter. This time it's a familiar burn, she's twisting my wrist at an uncomfortable angle. The gun drops out of my grasp.
She dives for it, so I grab her and throw her to the side. Her eyes meet mine, and for one bizarre moment, the pain in her face is a punch to my stomach.
Then it's gone and my fist is slamming into her jaw.
She kicks the gun away from me, and then she swings her leg up and kicks me in the stomach. The air leaves me lungs. Someone taught this girl how to fight.
I grab her foot and yank. She falls, landing on a bloody shoulder. I pull my foot back, and she looks up at me, helpless, and for a minute I hesitate.
Then she's diving for the gun, so I'm grabbing a fistful of her hair.
She touches my wrist. The fire shoots through my arm again.
"Tobias," she said, and for a second I feel dizzy.
But you're older than I am ... Tobias.
She's not saying those words now, but she has before. They make no sense, but the combination of the heat of her touch and those words have my pulse doing something weird.
My heart races.
She spins around and kicks me again, getting out of my grasp, and getting her hands on the gun. She points it at me.
"Tobias. I know you're in there somewhere."
You were in my fear landscape. She stands up. My head is spinning.
"Tobias, please. Please. See me."
You're afraid of me?
Not of you. Of being with you—with anyone.
I move toward her on shaky legs. What is this? Was I—were we...?
No. She's evil, a threat, I wouldn't—would I?
"Please see me, Tobias, please!"
I have a sudden flashback. But it's not a moment I can see, it's a feeling.
I am abruptly very aware of how perfectly her body would fit against mine, of the place my hands belong on her hips, the way her lips are soft and they move in perfect synchronization with mine.
As if this isn't confusing enough, she suddenly holds the gun out for me. She's letting me take her weapon.
I grab it and push it against her head. I can do this. I can kill her and end this.
I can hear the way Eric's voice will sound when I tell him I was the one that killed her. He'll be so proud.
But I can also picture her eyes on me as I throw knives at her head, as she looks at me with unyielding trust in her gaze.
I click the bullet in place and she closes her eyes. I put my finger on the trigger. Her face is twisted with fear.
But I remember sitting on a train with her in my lap, her fingers in my hair, my heart racing harder than ever before, and that bizarre fire was there.
And I remember holding her hand.
And I can't kill her.
But I need to.
She tenses. So do I.
Inhale, brace yourself. Exhale, pull trigger.
I remember teaching her this.
I remember pushing my hand to her stomach and teaching her how to fight.
I can't kill her.
A/N: I feel like this is also really short, but I actually like it. It was a short chapter in the book, too. Let me know how you think I did.
