Updated again tonight.
There's no guarantee that this will be easy
It's not a miracle you need, believe me
I'm no angel, I'm just me
But I will love you endlessly
Wings aren't what you need
You need me.
Konohamaru, Udon, and Moegi were hiding in a bush, watching through the opening of leaves as Kaiya and Yoshi walked by. They were laughing at who-knows-what, heading towards the Hokage Mountain. Konohamaru's eyes lowered. "Are they holding hands?" Udon asked, trying to push past Moegi to see.
"Shhh! Quiet, Udon. Stop moving!" Konohamaru scolded as quietly as possible. He frowned, turning his attention back to Kaiya. "They're not holding hands, but they are really close. But from here it kinda looks like he wants to hold her hand. Who is this chump anyway?" I wonder how Uncle Asuma would react if he were still here… Konohamaru's heart suddenly dropped in his chest at the pained memory of his late uncle.
When Kakashi told Ronin of the rumors going around about his brother and his student, the younger man shook his head, letting out a deep sigh. "That idiot…Kaiya would squash him like a bug. I can only imagine the hell he's going to receive from Haru once he hears about this." Kakashi blinked, lowering his visible eye in question.
"What would you say if Kaiya was interested in Yoshi and gave him a chance? Would you feel that was inappropriate?" he wondered. Ronin frowned.
"I'm not exactly sure, to be honest," he admitted. "I guess I wouldn't mind it, as long as they didn't kiss in front of me or anything disgusting like that. I'd just be glad of the fact Kaiya was finally over Sasuke." Kakashi nodded, staring at his book blankly.
"You're right. I just don't know if Kaiya has reached that point yet. Yoshi appears to be the complete opposite of Sasuke, but I know that if Kaiya opened herself up, she might actually like him. The question is, can she let go of the past?" Ronin crossed his arms.
"Even after all the training she's gone through, I don't think she has. I just hope Yoshi knows what he's getting into. I don't want either one of them to get hurt."
…
Kaiya and Yoshi watched the sunset together. Yoshi smiled, watching Kaiya gleam at the colors changing in the sky. Once the daylight was gone and the moon began to shine, surrounded by the stars, they laid on their backs and stared up at the wonders of the universe.
"You know, I've never taken time to just relax and do things like this," Yoshi confessed. "I feel like I've missed out on somethin', ya know?" He and Kaiya had spent the entire day together, from the moment they returned to the Leaf until now. They were both exhausted, but neither one wanted to admit it, because they were having too much fun. It was the first time in forever that Kaiya could be herself. Her ribs hurt from laughing so much, and her cheeks ached from smiling. She couldn't remember the last time she'd felt so at home, especially with someone other than Naruto or Kakashi. Or Sasuke.
Kaiya forced his image out of her mind. She hadn't thought about him all day, and it had been great. Also, thinking about him would make her think about Itachi and what he said in the cave six months ago. The truth about the Uchiha clan. The fact that he was about to die, and he was ok with it. She didn't want to be reminded of those things—not now. She was enjoying Yoshi's company far too much for something like that to interfere.
And that was another thing.
Yoshi made Kaiya feel important. He made her laugh, he comforted her when she was down, and he was protective over her. He was everything that Sasuke wasn't. But even so, she didn't want to lose herself in someone only to end up heartbroken once again. The pain was hard enough the first time, but a second time… No, she thought. Yoshi would never do that. He would never betray her, turn his back on her, or break her heart. He was different.
But no matter how much she tried to convince herself, she just couldn't give in. She had spent three years building up a wall around her heart, and she wasn't about to knock it down for anyone, especially Yoshi.
"Well, after meeting your father, I can't say that it surprises me." She chuckled lightly, closing her eyes for a moment. "To be honest, I don't know if I could've kept my sanity if I didn't take a break from it all every once in a while. Kuro-sensei wasn't the break-taking type, so I had to do it on the rare occasions I was allowed to sleep. Even then, it wasn't much, but it was enough to get me by, I guess. It was the same in Ookami Valley." Yoshi grinned.
"Heh. Yeah, my dad is kind of an asshole," he agreed. "He's kinda like your trainer—all work and no play. But even so, he just wants our clan to thrive, so he makes us work hard to maintain its reputation. It sucks sometimes, but at the end of the day, that's what a good clan leader does…and a good trainer." Kaiya sighed, nodding as she slowly moved to a sitting position; Yoshi followed.
"You're right, Yoshi. Kuro-sensei just wanted to bring out the best in me." She lowered her eyes, hugging her knees to her chest as she remembered what she learned of her trainer while she was in Ookami Valley. Ronin had been right—she had hated him when she learned of his secrets. At least, she did at first. But there was just something about spending so much time with somebody that it didn't matter what was in their past, what they kept from you; you knew who they really were, so even when their darkest secrets surfaced, you didn't care. Not forever. She could never hate him for something he had no say in. She couldn't blame Kuro for wanting to keep his past hidden.
"And what about Sasuke, then?" Jin wondered. She ignored him.
Yoshi walked Kaiya home. After wearing themselves out all day, they didn't say much then, taking in the night scene of the Hidden Leaf. It was calm, peaceful. They crossed a small bridge over a pond, stopping to stare down at their reflections, illuminated by lanterns floating on the water's surface. Yoshi figured it was the perfect opportunity to once again make his move. "Hey, Kaiya?" She glanced at him, doing her best not to relish on how romantic their setting was.
"Yeah?" Clearing his throat, he averted his eyes to the pond nervously.
"I, uh…I just wanted to thank you for spending the day with me," he said, his cheeks flushing. She blinked, a small smile on her face.
"I'm the one who should be thanking you," she corrected him. "It's been a while since I've completely let loose. I really needed this, especially after working so hard for six months." He grinned, his breath hastening as he tried to muster up the courage to kiss her. Finally, he sucked in a deep breath, resting his hand on top of hers lightly, gripping the handle of the wooden bridge. He slowly leaned in, taking her chin with his other hand. Kaiya's eyes widened, and fear washed over her. She figured he would try to kiss her again, as he did in Yu, but she didn't expect him to dive right in. However, this time, she didn't try to stop him. At least not yet.
Both Kaiya and Yoshi were too occupied at the moment to notice the hoard of people crowded in the shadows behind a grove of trees nearby. They were pushing each other, stepping on each other's toes, and climbing over one another to try and catch a glimpse of what was going on. Sakura, Naruto, and even Sai were there, along with Kiba, Hinata, Shino, Konohamaru, Udon, Moegi, Shikamaru, Choji, Ino, Neji, Lee, and Tenten. Even Guy showed up.
"Ouch! That was my toe, Naruto!" Tenten murmured angrily. The blonde squirmed.
"Sorry! I can't see. Choji's in the way!" As the majority of them argued and fussed with one another in hushed tones, Hinata and Neji were using their Byakugan, steering clear of the mass by standing a few feet behind them.
"What are you guys doing?" Everyone stiffened as they heard Kakashi's voice behind them. He was careful to remain quiet, so as not to disturb the scene going on only about a meter away. He lifted an eyebrow in question, first turning to his students. "Why are all of you spying on Kaiya and Yoshi?"
"They're on a date, Sensei," Sakura told him excitedly. "We…well, uh…"
"Kakashi-sensei, look at her!" Naruto exclaimed as loudly as he could while whispering. Kakashi frowned underneath his mask, giving Guy a glare, to which he chuckled embarrassingly.
"I, uh, just wanted to make sure these guys weren't causing any trouble," he lied. Sighing, the silver-haired Jonin shook his head, deciding to take a peek, per Naruto's instruction. His eye widened, almost unnoticeably, as he watched what happened next.
Yoshi and Kaiya's lips were an inch away from touching, when the worst possible thing at that moment happened: "Kaiya, I need to speak with y—" Ronin's loud, boisterous call startled them, and they jumped apart, stiffening at the thought of him catching them in such an awkward position. He stopped, seemingly just noticing what was going on. He blinked, forcing down an embarrassed blush before speaking again. "Oh, uh…was I interrupting something?" he asked hesitantly, clearing his throat.
"Umm…" Kaiya didn't know what to say. She was too busy trying to stop her entire face from turning a deep red. Before Ronin could respond, an outraged Yoshi grabbed his brother by the face and ran off to an unknown location.
"We'll be back, Kaiya. Stay right there!" he called behind him. After distancing himself far enough to be out of earshot, appearing in an alleyway, Yoshi released his oldest brother. Both of them were exasperated.
"Hey, Yoshi, what the hell? That hurt, bastard!" Ronin rubbed his face, giving him a dirty look. There was a red handprint visible from his forehead to his chin. Yoshi was too busy bearing his fangs to notice.
"What the hell do you think you're doing, Ronin?!" he shouted. "Do you have any idea what you just did? Do you have any idea what was about to happen?!" Ronin blinked, and he shook his head, sighing.
"Oh, I see. You're pissed because I walked up on you trying to lock lips with my student. Boohoo. You know, I'm kinda disturbed by that. But nobody cares about my feelings." Yoshi, breathing heavily, turned his head.
"Like I care what you think! Do you have any idea how long I've been waiting for this? And wasn't it you who told me to just go for it?"
"Well, those weren't my exact wor—" Yoshi grabbed Ronin by his shirt, shaking him violently.
"Do you know how badly I want to kill you right now?!" By the time he let him go, Ronin's head was spinning. He stumbled, catching himself quickly.
"Calm down, will ya?" Ronin said, grabbing his head. "If Kaiya really likes you, you'll have more than one chance to kiss her sooner or later." Yoshi pouted, crossing his arms.
"I prefer sooner. Like, tonight," he mumbled. Ronin rolled his eyes.
"Honestly, Yoshi, grow up." Yoshi stared at his palms as he held them up to the artificial light of the lampposts surrounding them. He considered slapping Ronin, but decided against it.
"No matter how careful I am, she just keeps pulling back. It's like she doesn't want to trust anyone else; she doesn't want to feel the pain of heartbreak again. That Sasuke guy…he really hurt her, didn't he?" Ronin sighed, biting his cheek. He thought back to the first time Kaiya entered the Uchiha Estate, wandering around from compound to compound. He remembered her defeated countenance as she wept all night, crying herself to sleep. He'd been the one to return her to her bed the next morning, knowing that she would stay there for days if she could. Finally, he nodded.
"Yeah. Yeah, he did. She'll deny it until she runs out of breath, but the truth of the matter is, she's not the same person because of him. She's afraid to feel again; she doesn't want to open her heart to anyone else, even her friends. If you want to change that, you're going to have to tell her exactly how you feel, Yoshi."
When the two brothers returned to Kaiya's side, Ronin told her, "Report to Lady Tsunade first thing in the morning, Kaiya. Don't be late." She nodded, and he disappeared in a cloud of smoke. Yoshi cleared his throat, rubbing the back of his head as he let out a deep sigh.
"I, uh…I'm sorry about that," he apologized. She looked away nervously, embarrassed that her sensei walked up on her almost kissing his brother. Not only that, but she kept telling herself not to fall for Yoshi, and yet she was about to kiss him—again. Yoshi felt guiltier than he had the first time he tried to make a move on her. Lowering his head in shame, he groaned. "I guess the universe just doesn't want us together, because no matter how many times I try, I just can't make this work. I'm sorry that I keep putting you in a difficult position, Kaiya. It won't happen again."
Despite Kaiya's stubbornness in not falling for anyone ever again, it happened. She couldn't deny that anymore. With every moment that she spent with Yoshi, it became more evident that she liked him as more than a friend. Maybe there was such a thing as second chances in love. Maybe, if she gave Yoshi a chance, things might turn out differently than they did with Sasuke. Could she really let him go?
"You don't have to apologize for anything, Yoshi," she assured him. "You haven't done anything wrong. The truth is, I…I'm the problem." He frowned in question. She sighed, glancing back down at the lantern-lit pond. "I just can't seem to let go of Sasuke, even though he's let go of me, but I just want to move on. I just don't want something like that to happen again." Yoshi's quizzical expression softened, and a small grin appeared. He gently lifted Kaiya's chin, turning her to face him. He could clearly see, even in the limited light, the pain that Sasuke caused her.
"Sasuke was a fool," he told her. "But I suppose I should thank him, because now I have a shot to correct his mistakes. I've never cared about anyone as much as I care about you. I might even…I might even be in love with you." Her eyes widened, and she tried to look away, but she couldn't this time. "Kaiya, I want you to know…I would never break your heart. I'm not Sasuke."
"I know," she whispered, closing her eyes. Finally, she was willing to give in. Yoshi leaned in, and this time, she didn't stop him. His lips were cool, soft. He was gentle, just like she figured he'd be. He leaned in closer, deepening the kiss.
Needless to say, everyone watching was shocked. They weren't able to hear what they had said to each other, but they could see everything. Jaws hit the ground, eyes bulged out of their sockets. They didn't think it was possible. Even Kakashi was utterly shocked. Boy, this was going to be awkward.
…
Kaiya had no idea why everyone was acting strange around her. Everywhere she went, it felt like her friends and comrades were keeping some kind of secret from her. It was almost as if they had planned her a surprised birthday party, and they were trying to contain their excitement so as not to give it away. Even Kakashi shot her awkward glances every now and again. When she went over the next day to walk with him to the Hokage Mansion, since he had also been summoned, he was mostly silent—even more than usual—but he looked as if he were contemplating something significant.
"Wanna tell me why everyone is acting so weird?" she asked him, taking a seat on his couch. She crossed her arms and closed her eyes. "It must be something big if it's got you acting out of whack." Kakashi's eye narrowed in thought, and he came to sit next to her. Taking a deep breath, he let it out slowly. Finally, he spoke.
"Well, it's just that everyone saw you with Yoshi yesterday," he pointed out. She paled. "They're just curious as to who he is and if you two have something going on. I suppose they're just too scared to ask you, though they seem excited. To be honest, I would like to know the same thing." Kaiya blinked, lowering her eyes to the floor. She knew she could trust Kakashi with just about anything, but to involve him in her love life was something she wanted to avoid at all costs. It's not that he would judge her or anything of the like; it's just that it was too awkward for her to talk about. But he figured out her feelings toward Sasuke before, and he'd probably guessed her feelings for Yoshi by now.
"I…" There was really no harm in telling him anything. Unlike Sasuke, Yoshi wouldn't care if she told anyone about their relationship—or whatever it was. She'd figured they were seen by several of her friends the day before, and it's not like they were trying to hide it. But to think that they would automatically assume something was going on between them made her stomach churn. She didn't have much experience with relationships—hardly any at all, really—and everyone had always seen her as someone who didn't waste time with such a thing, which was probably why Yoshi had everyone stirred up.
"I like Yoshi, and he likes me." She shrugged. "I don't know exactly what's going on, but…for the first time, I think I might be able to take my mind off of Sasuke." Kakashi's eyebrows furrowed. I figured as much. "The only thing is…I hate Sasuke, and yet I still have feelings for him. Now that I've come to terms with that, I don't want it to get in the way of anything that Yoshi and I might have. I'm not even sure I want a relationship, but I know that I don't want to pass up this opportunity. But just because I want it, doesn't mean that I should have it. That's my dilemma. Does that make sense?"
Kakashi studied Kaiya closely for several moments, thinking about what she'd just said. She's grown up. Even in as little as six months…I can see her maturity. "Makes perfect sense to me." He grinned underneath his mask. "You're conflicted and confused with the fact that you feel something for the man who broke your heart, and you want to move on to someone who you know won't hurt you," he restated. Kaiya nodded, lowering her head. "Love is a funny thing, Kaiya. No matter how deep you try to bury it, it can always be dug up by someone who's willing to search until they've found it. I think you've finally found that someone." Her eyes widened slightly, and she looked up at her former guardian.
"You really think so?" she asked. He nodded.
"Well, it looks that way. Don't let the past get in the way of making a future for yourself. If you have feelings for Yoshi, regardless of what you feel for Sasuke, it could be the medicine to heal your broken heart. Now, let's go see what Lady Tsunade wants."
…
When Kaiya reported to the Hokage, she was surprised to see Jiraiya in her office. Kakashi was sent on some other business, but he was supposed to come back before Kaiya's meeting was finished. The look on the Fifth's face made Kaiya suspicious, but she didn't comment on it. She wondered if Kakashi had been sent away because there was something she wanted to tell her without him there. "It's good to have you back, Kaiya," Tsunade said with a strained smile. She leaned back in her chair and closed her eyes, letting out a sigh. "And just in time, too." Kaiya's eyes narrowed. She was about to ask her what she meant, when Jiraiya cleared his throat loudly.
"Are you sure you want her in on this, Tsunade?" he asked. Kaiya frowned. "Given her history and all, it might be safer not to—"
"No, she deserves to know," the Hokage interrupted, folding her hands on her desk. She stared at Kaiya firmly, most likely trying to figure out how her six months away changed her, whether she should be relieved or concerned. But she seemed distant; her mind was far off.
"What's going on?" Kaiya wondered, crossing her arms. "What aren't you telling me, Lady Tsunade?" Sighing, Tsunade opened her mouth to answer, but thought better of it. Before Kaiya could argue any further, the door to the Hokage's office opened, and Naruto and Sakura walked in. Shocked to see them there at the same time, she shared a look with her friends before they all turned to Tsunade and Jiraiya in question. The Sannin shared a look as well and then turned to the teenagers, their expressions grave.
"It's Orochimaru," Tsunade admitted, staring at her desk. "He's dead."
The room fell silent.
"He's…he's what?!" Kaiya stammered, eyes wide. Tsunade nodded, propping her elbows onto her desk and entwining her fingers. She let out a brief sigh.
"That's right," Jiraiya said. "All of my credible sources say that Orochimaru was killed by Sasuke Uchiha." Kaiya couldn't believe it. Her archenemy was dead, and she wasn't the one who killed him.
Sasuke…
Everyone's eyes in the room turned to her. She averted her gaze to the floor quickly, neglecting to speak any further for the time being. Her gut twisted painfully, and she could hardly breathe. Looking out the window of the office, she saw the sun making its ascent into the sky, and at the moment, it was the darkest and most dreadful thing she'd ever seen, because she knew what Orochimaru's death meant more than anyone else. A shadow passed over her eyes as she clenched her fists.
"Then that means…" Sakura clasped her hands together eagerly. Kaiya's eyes lowered. By the expressions on her friends' faces, she was sure they made the assumption that Sasuke was coming home. But she knew that he still had yet to fulfill his one true goal: revenge.
"It doesn't look like he's coming back to the village," Jiraiya told them, crossing his arms. Sasuke had told Kaiya once that he was never returning to the Leaf, and she knew that to be a fact. Besides, he left to gain power in order to kill Itachi. It wouldn't make sense if he just came back without doing that.
"Why the hell not?!" Naruto shouted angrily. Kaiya couldn't believe that they couldn't just accept the truth. Why did they have to be so naïve to the fact that Sasuke didn't want anything to do with them?
"Naruto, don't you get it?" she questioned incredulously, outstretching her hands. He, along with the others, looked at her pointedly. "Sasuke doesn't care about this village or anyone in it. The only thing he wants is revenge. That was the whole reason he left, and it's the only thing on his mind. He won't stop until he gets it. That means that what's in his hindsight now…is the Akatsuki." Naruto's eyes widened.
Jiraiya nodded, letting out a deep sigh. "She's right, Naruto. He wants to kill his brother." Naruto clenched his fists, his eyebrows furrowing.
"Him again…that bastard." He waved his fists in the air frantically. "So if that's the case, we need to form a squad and move out to find him right now!" he declared desperately. "We're already hunting down the Akatsuki, so let's just find Itachi Uchiha first." Kaiya bit her lip. She knew that doing so would be taking a great risk. If Itachi didn't want to be found, he wouldn't be. Even more so, even most of the muscle in the village wouldn't be able to catch him. Naruto turned his attention to Kaiya, making her frown. "You know Itachi better than anyone, right? Is there a chance you know where he might be?" The others in the room blinked in confusion as she paled.
"Naruto, I—"
"What do you mean by that, Naruto?" Sakura wondered. Jiraiya's eyes narrowed. That's right…she admitted Itachi used to train her. I'd almost forgotten after all this time. But that doesn't necessarily mean she knows anything about his whereabouts now.
After realizing that he revealed what was probably supposed to be a secret, Naruto's eyes widened. He watched as Kaiya turned her face away, crossing her arms. Jiraiya knew she would stay tight-lipped, so he decided to speak for her, before Tsunade beat the answer out of her. "Itachi trained Kaiya when she was a kid," he told them. Both Tsunade and Sakura expressed their shock. "I don't know any of the details, but from what she told us, they were pretty close. When Itachi infiltrated the village looking for Naruto, Kaiya confronted him, and it took a heavy emotional toll on her, almost to Sasuke's level."
"Care to explain, Kaiya?" a baffled Tsunade asked. Kaiya wanted to tell them that her past with Itachi was none of their business and to shove it, but she knew that they wouldn't let up until she confessed. They were too desperate to get Sasuke back to let something like this go. Sighing, she stared out the window, rather than at any of them.
"Itachi was originally my guard after my father died," she admitted resentfully. "I was gone for several months at a time during a two year period, where I traveled and trained with Ringo and Tzu. But while I was in the village, Itachi was assigned to watch over me. He started training me in secret, as a way to help me cope with the loss of my family, and over time it developed into a strong bond between the two of us. We became attached, and I…well, he meant a lot to me." Kaiya clenched her fists. She'd told them more than enough. "Anyway, if you're insinuating that I know something about Itachi's whereabouts because of our shared past, don't get too excited. The last time we met, it wasn't exactly under friendly circumstances."
No one said anything for a few seconds. No one would have thought that Kaiya and Itachi Uchiha would have been so close. But it made sense that she would be equally as close to Sasuke, and why it was such a heavy loss when he left. Something about the way she neglected to look at any of them made them think that there was more to the story. But they would never get it out of her—that much was clear.
"Besides…Sasuke will find him before any of us do. And once he does, no force on earth will be able to stop the inevitable," she promised.
"Hmm…" Jiraiya frowned, holding his chin with his hand thoughtfully. "Well, it seems that our best bet—our only option—is to capture Itachi Uchiha and let Sasuke come to us," he figured. Sakura nodded.
"Even so, if we capture just one member of Akatsuki, we can turn them over to the Intel Division, and they can extract whatever information we need," she suggested. Tsunade nodded. Kaiya's eyes narrowed slowly. They act as if doing so would be easy, but they killed Uncle Asuma like it was nothing. If you don't kill the bastards, they'll kill you. How many more people will we sacrifice just to save Sasuke?
"Too bad they're not high on talking." Everyone looked at the open door, where Kakashi was now standing. "From our encounters with them, it's obvious that capturing them was either too dangerous or not even an option," he pointed out. Kaiya was thankful that at least one person in the room had some sense. "So the only thing we can do at this moment is try our hardest to find Itachi…right?" Kaiya frowned, an annoyed tick appearing in the corner of her forehead. So much for Kakashi being the reasonable one…
Muddling truth among the lies, mirroring faces that I despise
Fear to fight for what I feel, tending to wounds that never heal.
