The Slytherins all gathered in the 6th year dorm room for a mini-lecture. Since Severus had asked Regs what and how to start intimacy with his girlfriend, Regs told Mulciber, who told Rowle, who told Avery and it got out of hand. So now Regs was holding a meeting that included all of them and a chalkboard he stole from an empty classroom. They were sitting on the bed facing the back wall he had taken over with drawings and writing on the board. Severus had never felt so embarrassed in his life, no one seemed to care since they were in the same boat.
"What if she's not ready?" Severus asked.
"For the last time you don't have to raise your hand, just don't interrupt me." Regs rolled his eyes and sighed heavily. "That's the whole point of this- to A- make her ready and B- know when she is. Haven't you been listening?"
"That's not what he's asking. Severus- if she still isn't ready for whatever reason then you have to respect that. Always put her needs before yours. Always." Lucius turned around to look at him as he spoke. "A gentleman never pushed a lady into something she isn't ready for."
Severus nodded in understanding. "What if I'm not ready?"
"Your cock work? Then you're ready." Nott snorted.
Regs rolled his eyes dramatically. "Moving on… next up is cock placement."
"Whoa hold the floo. I know what to do when I get there. There's only one place for my cock to go." Avery interrupted.
Regs laughed while throwing his head back and pointing at him. "Then you have no idea. You innocent little snake. Look, I'm the one teaching you guys because I'm the one with the most experience- from both sexes and I'm the youngest, I might add."
"Question I've wanted to ask for a long time now… why Lockhart? Of all people- Lockhart?!" Yaxley asked.
"Jealous?" he laughed at his friend trying to recover. "Two things. Bubble butt and no gag reflex."
"Alright, I'm gonna be sick. I'm going to put that on the list of things I didn't need to know about Lockhart." Lucius gagged and tried to shake the image from his mind.
Regs tucked his wand away then pointed to his crotch. "I was talking about here you lean your cock. Where and how you tuck, it will make all the difference in the world. Believe me, I've gotten laid so many times just because they liked the size or the package."
"Not gay if I look at his crotch right?" Rowle asked Avery who shook his head.
"That doesn't make any sense, what's the tuck for?" Yaxley asked and tilted his head.
"Gives them a little sneak peak of what they could have. Believe me- it matters. I have to listen to my cousins talk about it over the summers." Regs said and sneered at the memory.
"Did Narcissa say anything about me?" Lucius asked hopefully.
"She said you are young but have potential. Stop sidetracking! Snape! What direction do you tuck your cock?" Regs asked as he pointed to him.
He didn't like to be put on the spot especially on a topic he knew little to nothing about. "Uh… up."
"Up your arse?!" Nott asked with mild humor and mild disbelief.
"I didn't know up was a fucking option!" Yaxley exclaimed.
"Ever since second year when Black and Potter kept hitting me in the dick. I started tucking up since. You get hit there so many times before you take drastic measures. It's not like I can wear a cup all the time!" Severus defended himself.
Regs winced slightly and covered his hand over his crotch. "I remember that. They got me too, but anyway it's time to change that! Stand up- which is your wand hand? Right? Okay, tuck your cock down the right."
Everyone stood up and started to adjust themselves.
"There's so much more room now!" Rowle said and started to do leg stretched and lunges by his bed.
"Can you still run? Aw yeah!" Yaxley laughed and started to run in place.
"Not towards the pocket, down the leg." Regs instructed.
"Like this?" Severus asked and looked down at himself.
Regs stared to stutter. "Wh- what the- the fuck?! You got a sock down there?!"
"What? No! Should I?" Severus self consciously covered himself.
"You got a stiffy right now?" Nott asked as he leaned away.
"What- No! This is my normal… you know whatever." He said quickly.
"That's your dick? That whole thing is your dick?" Nott asked as he eyed him wearily.
"No fucking way," Avery said in disbelief. Avery's bed was right behind Severus' he reached over quickly and pulled his pants and boxers down to his knees. His eyes bulged, and he threw his hands up while jumping away from Severus. "Ahh!"
Severus' face turned bright red as he picked his pants back up and tucked himself away. They had lived together for six years now, had open showers and urinals but they never openly looked at each other.
"I fucking give up! How can I compete with a flaccid six incher?!" Yaxley pulled the rolled up sock from his trousers and threw it hard on the ground.
"I'll be damned… Snape's mug is ugly as shit, but he's blessed with a cock from the gods." Mulciber howled with laughter as he pointed at him.
"Stop- you're making him feel bad." Lucius defended his best friend.
Regs whistled loud to get them to settle down. "Snape- this is good. This is great actually! Every guy out there wants to have a big cock. The bigger, the better, the most the best so the saying goes."
Severus scowled at all of them, the red flush in his face still bright. "Well, what now? Tuck to the side and then?"
"Hit her over the head with it and carry her to bed." Mulciber punched his fist in imitation.
"For you? Nothing. Your cock will do all the work." Regs laughed so hard he had to grab one of the bedposts to stay standing upright. "Seriously I could spot that fucker from fifty yards."
"Great and what about the rest of us?" Avery asked sarcastically with his arms crossed.
Regs cleared his throat and wiped the tears of laughter from his eyes. "Ahem. You make sure she sees it. Don't worry they will. If she's sitting down make sure they're cock level like this."
Nott was closest, and he was sitting on his bed. Regs walked up to him and grabbed his head and brought it close to his crotch. He smacked him away and jumped back. "Get your dick out of my face!"
