Hi sorry if you have read this but I was having problems uploading and I had to delete some chapters from two of my stories to get the problem sorted out, so here we go all in order now.
"Listen to me... yes I am scared of dieing, but dieing in the place of a loved one seems like a good way to go.... innocent people are dieing Em, we have to stop this." I stroked his cheek gently like mom used too to calm him down or comfort him.
I heard the mummers behind me, it seems every one had something to say about my little speech, but I blanked it off, Emmett was looking me straight in the eye, his face portraying the mix emotions he was feeling.... still, at a time like this I could still feel sorry for Jasper having to feel everyone's emotions, so I tried to calm myself.
I heard a crash from somewhere in the house. Looking around I noticed Edward had gone...
"No!" came his sharp shout, it was when I turned to the sound of his voice that I was inches from his face, his once golden eyes now black pleading with me silently, the sorrow that shone in the deep depths of them was overpowering.
"Edward…" I began in a soft almost non existent voice.
"No! No matter what you say I will not put you in harms way, the other day with the fight was a bad thing…. Terrible… we could loose control… we all could, in battle everything gets confusing and you will not be near that I will not allow it."
"Edward you have to think about it, Jasper was thinking about it in a military perspective…. Which is what we need, this is not just petty playground fight this is like a war… no matter what you say he needs to be listened to for he knows what he is doing." I said looking at him in the eye trying to make him see my way and the prospect of not doing something that they would not expect, which this was exactly what they would not think of. "They will think you will hide me like you have tried to for the last times, if we take them head on we can out smart them, they know there are three wolves not eight, we have so much more advantages then they do and if we don't take them then we are just falling into what they want us to."
There was silence; I could see the unwanted acceptance that I was right fall onto Edward's face, his brow lined and eyes sad. "We don't know how much they know… I can't loose you… not when I have just found you." His hands took my face and he rested his forehead against mine.
"As much as I want to disagree with you Bella, you do have a point," the man from the tribe said, I think Sam was his name. "There must be some sort of compromise about this; we can't put you in unnecessary danger, agreeing with the lea… Edward, but we can pass up the chance at catching them unawares." I couldn't see his face as Edward still had my face turned to his, under his.
"Bella…" Emmett said in such a small voice I never thought possible, I tried to move to look at him, Edward let go of my face but kept his close proximity. The look on his face was heart shattering. "If we go with this idea…. You leave at the first sign of a problem no question or comments, you can't leave me and dad, I wouldn't be able cope let alone live with seeing Edward… Promise me that, and mean it, don't try and be all heroic… we compromise we listen to you and do as you and Jasper say and in return you leave when we tell you to."
"I promise." I said, surprising myself with the strength in my voice. I looked around the rest of the room at everyone's faces. Jasper seemed to be upset about something, maybe he was regretting having the thought as if anything happened to me he would feel it was his fault, Alice was rubbing his arms muttering something to him, trying to calm him but the thing was I would have thought of the same thing eventually so Jasper wasn't to blame.
Carlisle was watching everyone, looking around mostly to Edward whose intense gaze I felt on me, Rose was like Alice trying to comfort Emmett, Esme was I could tell was torn between everyone. The wolves were all looking to their leader, Sam, except one, Jacob was looking at me with sadness in his eyes, hurt and almost denial.
"So it's settled then all we need to do now is think of a place and when." Sam said.
"We need to get it over with before anyone else gets killed." I said looking back at Edward; he was looking at me still.
"Soon… Right well we will get back to you when we have thought; I suggest you do the same… think of a possible place and time and we will once more compromise… also we will not harm you we are not familiar with your scent we will let the treaty go for now, the boundaries will be let go but the intention still stands as you have given to us." Sam said once more, giving a quick nod to the Cullen's and looking at me, "Stay safe Bella." And with that they all turned to leave.
I turned to Edward and looked into his eyes that had never left me, I could not see any of the gold that was there before, he was upset and angry, "Go hunting I'll be right here I wont be leaving." I said trying to coax him into going, he needed to go, clear his head and think things through even if it was something that I may not think is a good idea for he was the sort of person who would try and think of something to go around the situation… but he needed sometime to himself.
"Bella…" he began to say.
"Go, you aren't doing any good by being thirsty, you need to go." I stepped up to him and wrapped my arms around him, as soon as I touched him I was pressed against his chest with his face in my hair taking deep breaths. "Go."
"I'll be back in an hour." And with that I was left standing there in the center of the room, my arms dropped to my side and I stared at the empty space in front of me…..
What have I done…?
Why did I do that…..?
How could I do that to him…?
Dear God, the only thing I ask of you is to hold him when I'm not around, when he's much to far away, I told him to go and now I wished he stayed, because I'm lonely and I'm tired I need him with me for the time I may have left.
I knew it was silly, praying an all, I was never religious but I couldn't tell anyone, I needed to stay strong so that they didn't change their minds from finding out that I didn't actually believe what I had said, it's the only way I see us pulling through.
Without looking to the others I slowly made my hobbled way to the door to the entrance to the house where the large stair case was with the grand piano, upon walking out I was faced with the mess of the tables that were next to the front door for the phone and bits you would find in a normal home (to blend in). the tables were no longer standing but in a large scattered broken mess across the floor, the door to the kitchen was broken in half leaving a long panel of wood were the hinges were and the rest with the destroyed tables on the stone floor.
I blinked away the tears that were beginning to form in my eye's, this was my fault I had caused him to get this angry, I had caused him this pain that he had to vent.
Forcing myself to move I made my way slowly to the piano bench and sat down on it facing the ivory keys that had once gave me so much and now they only gave me the fear and pain of what I was putting my only love through.
There was a sheet of paper on the stand, there was only a few notes written onto it signifying that he must have been composing something when all of this kicked off. I sighed and let myself collapse onto the keys, my arms under my head as I rested against the instrument creating a mighty racket of the keys being presses heavily under me. I felt the tears come then, my face hidden in my folded arms in the keys.
I heard movement behind me but I made no move to acknowledge it, I felt a small cold hand on my shoulder but once again I didn't move, I didn't even try to hid the tears that were running down my face, for one thing Jasper could feel what I was and for another they could all smell the salt tears, so there was no real point in trying to hide the fact, but that didn't mean I had to face them.
The hand left my shoulder and the noises of the clean up party sounded in the now silent house. My heart felt heavy I was tearing this family apart… unintentionally but still the same.
+V+
I didn't know how long I sat there on the piano, my tear had now dried and I had nothing left to cry, sitting up I looked around the room.
I was alone and the mess that once littered the floor was now gone, not one speck signifying the destruction that was left there due to my insensitivity. I turned back to the piano and looked at the sheet of paper that was on the stand.
My fingers reached out and lay them down on the keys, I knew a bit of how to play like where the notes were and how to work out what notes were on the sheet, but that was it really.
I worked out the first few notes and slowly and hesitantly pressed the first key, then after a pause I found the second and third, I managed to find the keys and I went back to play the melody again to see what the tune was. My fingers were clumsy when I tried to play the tune so I could see what it was, I did recognize it even from my poorly played try.
I began once again getting the hang of it more. As I reached to the last part that I could understand, I was making a mess of the song but it fitted my mood well, cold hands lay themselves on top of mine guiding me into playing. I didn't need to look up to realize who it was who was stood behind me, Edward had come back.
I let my hands be lead by Edwards, my heart was beating loudly in my chest as I felt his breath on the back of my neck, I let my hands fall from the keys and shifted so I was perched on the edge of the bench as Edward took over and played the melody letting it form into a different version of my lullaby, this one seemed to be powerful, more so then before where it was the soft soothing and calming lullaby it was to begin with. I felt him shift behind me, his chest brushed my back and his legs came around me as he sat behind me.
Letting my hands drop I placed them onto his legs keeping them from interfering with his playing. My head drooped down and to the side as his lent in, hearing his slow cool breaths played with me, his scent surrounding me.
"I'm sorry." I whispered unable to gain any volume.
"No don't be… you are right in some way…" he sighed as he let his own hands drop from his playing to rest on top of mine on his legs, "I shouldn't have gotten angry like that."
I turned quickly wrapping my arms around his neck and pressing myself into his torso, burring my face in the crook of his neck and breathing him in. "I want this to stop."
"It will, I will keep you safe, like I said before I just found you and I don't want to loose you, if I did I would waste away… I don't want to be with out you… alone…" he sounded so vulnerable like a lost child begging for it's parents or even someone who they recognize.
"You won't be I will never leave you." I knew I couldn't promise him, so did he, but I would never leave him intentionally… hell I would even fight against the very force of nature to stay alive to be with him. If only I was like him then we wouldn't be worrying about this, I would be able to fend for myself… "Change me." I blurted out.
"What?" he stiffened around me but didn't move to break the tight contact we had.
"Change me; turn me into one of you." I said in a normal voice.
