The man holding the knife looked almost as scared as we did. He sure wasn't expecting anyone to come home.

He walked in to the kitchen and threw Logan's rucksack at our feet.

"Money, wallets and phones!" He demanded in a shaky voice as he poked the bag with his black booted toe.

Kendall emptied his pockets and chucked the contents in the bag his hand was shaking beyond belief. Next was Logan to turn his pockets out. Only a wallet went in.

"Where's the fucking phone!" The robber demanded, his voice giving him away as a scared young man. Yet he still continued to wave the knife at Logan.

Logan took a deep breath, and began shaking his head. "I don't have it man... I was in a fight... it's lost" Logan replied as he showed the man the inside of all his empty pockets.

The robber despite having his face covered in a ski mask very much had his eyes on display. I saw him look over the state Logan was in. I expect Logan looked terrifying to him, shirtless, bloodied and beaten. I think Logan realised this too.

I saw Logan glance at Kendall to see the state he was in. He was weighing up the odds of two against one, then seeing Kendall was in no condition to fight anymore as back up, Logan eyed the masked man over to see if he could handle him alone.

I made eye contact with Logan. I wanted to scream 'dont you fucking dare' at him as I saw it cross his mind. Logan returned my eye contact with the look to say he could bring this guy down.

"You!" The man then said to me, demanding my belongings.

"I.. I left my purse in the hall" I said nodding in the direction behind him.

The robber looked behind briefly, not stupid enough to turn his back on us.

"All of you on the floor, face down!" He then demanded. "Hands on head" he added as an after thought.

I did as I was told, so did Logan, it was Kendall that was having difficulty. The pain from the kicking Logan had given him was stopping him from being able to get down successfully on the floor.

"Hurry the fuck up!" The robber demanded kicking Kendall in his leg.

"I can't do it" Kendall said looking at me, his eyes wincing in pain.

I looked up to the robber. "I can help him" I explained getting back up on my feet.

"Shut the fuck up, we... we will do it this way" the robber decided, grabbing me and placing the knife to my throat. "If you move... she gets cut... clear!" He explained to Logan and Kendall. I could feel the knife trembling in his hand.

I started crying on feeling the blade rest against my skin.

Kendall nodded. "Don't.. hurt her... please." He stammered out.

"Shut the fuck up" the robber replied as he walked backwards out to the hall. He saw my purse on the side table.

Through my tears as I was marched out backwards from the kitchen I saw Kendall had sheer panic in his eyes. My adrenalin levels were through the roof, Christ knows what his were like watching me be taken away from him at knife point.

Logan looked furious, even though I wasn't his girlfriend anymore, the protection that Logan wanted to offer me was a bond for life. I could see the mental battle he was having with himself right now. Weighing up the odds on wether I would end up hurt if he made a grab for this masked man who held a weapon at me.

"Pick it up" the man demanded as he forced me out to the table in the hall.

I did as I was told, I could hear Logan and Kendall bickering in the kitchen. I prayed to God that Logan wasn't going to try and play the hero.

"Are the keys of the house in there?" The man asked.

"Yes" I replied.

"Lock the door then give me the keys" he instructed.

With a heavy heart I locked the door with us now trapped inside. I gave him the keys which he put in his pocket.

"Please don't hurt us" I pleaded with the man. I could see the sweat pouring off of him around his eyes in the mask.

I knew from the look in his eye that this man... this boy, probably just a similar age to me was never going to hurt us. Obviously he was robbing our house and our neighborhood for a reason. No one does shit like this for fun, it's desperation.

The man didn't say a word but his eyes told me he was more scared than me. He lowered his knife to a less threatening position and thrust me back in to the kitchen.

The second I saw Kendall stood alone my heart accelerated with fear.

From the corner of my eye I saw Logan come at me. He shoved me hard, away from the burglars grasp and his knife.

I was thrown in to kendall as I fell, he made a painful grunting sound as his chest took the impact of me being propelled in to him.

I instinctively turned to see what Logan was doing. Kendall wrapped his arms around me to stop me from interfering as we both watched Logan punch the masked man in the face as they both scuffled on the floor.

The ski mask was taken off next revealing a sandy haired guy, no older than twenty. By the look on his face as Logan went to town on him, clearly being the stronger man. the robber wished he had stayed at home tonight.

It was almost as if this entire scenario was in slow motion, Logan was in complete control. He looked like a rabid animal on top of this guy, not like my Logan. I had always known Logan to have a hot head, but this was scary.

I felt sorry for the burglar. He wasn't even trying to fight back he was just trying to defend himself from Logan's flying fists.

As Logan eventually tired himself out the burglar got in a lucky shove, pushing Logan from him and on to the floor. With his new found freedom from Logan the apparent madman, the guy scrambled for my house keys in his pocket and ran to the door, leaving the bag of our belongings behind.

Logan sat up from the floor with a shocked look on his face.

"Jesus Logan! What the fuck were you thinking?" I asked.

Logan didn't say anything at first, he looked down to his stomach. "He... erm.. he stabbed me" he replied too calmly as he looked at himself. He was in shock.

Logan was already covered in blood from his fight from Kendall, but now it had been brought to my attention a fresh river of blood was steadily leaving his body from the side of his stomach.

"Oh my god... oh fuck.. just.. err just stay still" I rambled out as I made my way to him.

I was useless, I was in such a panic, my head wouldn't think straight. I looked at Kendall. I think he realised I didn't have a clue what to do.

"Sheri I feel funny" Logan said from the side of me. As he lay flat on the floor

All I could do was cry.

Kendall passed me a tea towel. "Sheri hold that down on it" he told me as he picked the bag up the burglar had left behind and grabbed his cell phone from it.

I was a sobbing wreck as I tried to stop the blood coming from Logan. It was seeping through the towel, my hands were covered in it. I heard Kendall asking for an ambulance as he spoke on the phone.

I turned to look at Kendall. "This isn't working. What do I do?" I sobbed.

"Hold it tight Sheri, put your weight on it" Kendall replied as he slumped on to the floor next to me.

"Sheri..." Logan said as he lay on the floor, his head on the cold tiles looked awkward, and unnatural.

"Logues it's fine... fuck it won't stop bleeding Kendall!" I called out.

Kendall dragged himself over, he was in obvious pain. "Logan, wake up pal... logues!?" Kendall said.

I looked to Logan's face and saw he was either unconscious or dead.

A howl left my mouth. "LOGAN!" I cried out. Kendall was by his side as I held my hand as tight as possible over his wound.

"He isn't breathing" Kendall said as he brought his ear down to listen, his eyes wide. My crying got harder.

"Oh my... is he dead?!" I said completely broken. Sharp cries leaving my body. I felt sick to the stomach.

Kendall didn't reply to me, he just began CPR.

Despite my efforts in holding the wound to stop the flow of blood, Logan was laying in a pool of it.

It was then I noticed that he had an exit wound too.

I felt at a complete loss. "I can't lose you Logan" I sobbed as I attempted to hold both his stomach and the back where the knife had plunged in to.

With my tears streaming down I tried my best to spot the knife, not wanting to look at Kendall carry on his CPR. Logan looked grey. The man must of taken the knife with him. It wasn't a lucky shove he gave Logan, it was a last ditch stab.

I heard the front door open, two paramedics came rushing in. They took over from Kendall and I. Once again life turned in to slow motion.

I watched on as Logan was seen to. Lots of scary looking equipment was being used. I had never been a religious person but I was praying right now. Praying that he would make it through. Praying that I would live to see those dark brown eyes and hear his laugh again.

Kendall placed his arm around me. "He will be fine Sheri" he whispered.

I searched Kendalls eyes, wanting to see the truth. All I saw in those eyes was an extremely scared Kendall.

Kendall and I went with Logan as he was rushed in to hospital. The paramedics weren't saying much whenever Kendall asked if Logan was going to be okay.

I felt empty. Completely empty. If I lost Logan I wouldn't even know what would become of me.

Kendall held my hand, trying to give me some kind of comfort.

When we arrived at the hospital Logan was rushed away. Kendall and I were left alone in a deserted waiting area.

I sat down on one of the cheap looking plastic seats. I looked at my hands that were covered in blood. "What will I do with out him?" I whispered out.

"You won't be without him. He will be fine... I promise" Kendall said as he knelt down in front of me, his face showing the pain he was in.

I nodded, wanting to believe. "I should phone his mom... and Cass" I replied absent mindedly.

Kendall handed me his phone. "Did you want me to do it?.. I'm not sure your in a fit state Sheri" he said as he held the phone out.

I wiped fresh tears away from me. "I would appreciate that. I don't know the number but if you Google the manor croft equestrian centre, it will be on the web site" I blubbed out.

Kendall nodded "manor croft" he repeated as he tapped away on his phone.

Kendall paced the floor as he spoke on the cell. I couldn't bear to think what must be going through Logan's mom's head. He hadn't had any contact with his family for months. For his mother to receive a call from a stranger to say her son was on deaths door must be awful.

Kendall hung up the phone in tears.

"How did she take it?" I asked as he sat in the plastic seat next to me.

"She was really upset. She is getting the first plane she can get on to be here with him." He replied then looked up to the set of double doors that Logan was rushed in to.

A nurse came out and walked towards us.

"How is he?" I asked not wanting to know. not knowing was the protection of knowing he wasn't dead.

I held my breath as she spoke.

"He is in surgery at the moment, he is doing good, as far as they can tell its just tissue damage, no internal organs were hit with the knife. The amount of blood he has lost is our main concern, once that is brought under control we will be able to patch him up. Is there a number we can call to let his family know?" She asked.

"We have just called them" Kendall replied. "How long will he be in surgery for?"

"I'm not entirely sure, once he is out then I will let you know" she replied.

Kendall gave my hand a squeeze as he thanked the nurse. She walked off in to the direction of where Logan's life hung in the balance.

"See that was good news" he said smiling. "Logie bear doesn't give up without a fight" he added.

I let out a sad chuckle. "If he makes it, it's because of you, you were amazing" I replied. "I couldn't even think straight."

"Because I wasn't the one watching the person I'm in love with bleed out on the floor..." Kendall said softly.

I looked at my hands again. "I do love Logan, Kendall but I'm not in love with him any more." I said so quietly I'm not sure he would hear me.

Kendall stayed silent for a moment. "Did you really sleep with James Sheri?" He asked. I saw him twisting his hands together in his lap.

"Yeah... yeah I did" I confessed. Wishing now that I hadn't opened my mouth. It seemed like a good idea at the time to get one over on Kendall, but now this had happened I just wanted everything to be calm.

"Sheri. The kiss you and James had tonight... are you..."

I butted in before he could get angry or carried away. "I'm not in love with James. I like him... I really do, but I've learnt my lesson on falling in love too quick. Maybe somewhere down the line though" I warned, it was better to be honest now than have to go through a similar evening as tonight started out with fist fights.

Kendall nodded as he looked at his hands. "You should... James is a good guy, he has liked you for a long time." Kendall said.

I looked at Kendall in surprise. I wasnt expecting him to give up so easily... or give in.

"I've caught you in a good mood then" I said with a smile. Knowing that tomorrow he will probably call me a whore.

Kendall shrugged. "I'm sorry about everything Sheri... life is too fucking short to be unhappy huh" he said as he looked up to the double doors that Logan was taken in to.

I took Kendalls hand. "Who broke your heart so badly that you ended up this unhappy Kendall?"

He looked up at me. The emotion in his eyes so visible. "No one" he said.

I let out a sigh. "Something must of happened." I said softly.

Kendalls tears left him silently. "I've never told anyone... it's just easier to be in control... your not any of the things I call you, I just try and steer you in the right direction by doing it... I just don't want you to get hurt... I didn't want kenzie to get hurt either." He replied.

"Did Mackenzie cheat on you?" I asked.

Kendall shook his head. He wanted to tell me, he really did. I didn't get why he was so scared of the truth all the time.

"Is it because of your seizures? Mackenzie said you have had them since 1st grade?" I asked.

He looked up. "Im sorry I lied to you about that. I have had them since first grade, probably a bit before that. They weren't as frequent though. Maybe two a year. It wasn't until I started noticing girls that they became a regular thing" he smiled.

I returned the smile. "Girls make you panic?"

"They never used to, it just takes one thing to change an entire life doesn't it" he mused.

"Who was she Kendall?" I asked. Surely the girl that had made him this way should be known. "Did she tell tales on you? Did she fuck your brother? Did she... I dunno... what did she do Kendall? It's time to be honest"

Kendall looked lost in thought as he relayed his own memories in his mind.

"I could of stopped it. If I was more of a man I could of stopped it." He said more to himself than to me, but it was a start.

"What was her name?" I asked taking his hand again.

Kendall let a deep breath out. "Her name was Savannah" he finally revealed.

"Did she cheat on you?" I asked.

"If only it was that simple." He began. "Savannah was the sexiest girl in my year, she was popular, pretty... a complete bitch" he laughed. "She was in my history class. I had never really spoken to her until we had to do a project together." He explained.

"Did you fall in love with her?" I asked.

"Well... yes and no. Savannah was loud and rude and hilarious. She did and said what she wanted to, she didn't give a fuck about anything... I wanted to be like her. I was so shy at school..." he trailed off.

"When was this?" I asked knowing that Kendall was with his last girlfriend Mackenzie for a year.

"We were both 15. Sav' used to come round my house to work on this dumb project but she was very good at distracting me. We ended up making out most of the time. She liked it that I was shy. Some of the things that she told me she had done were insane. Savannah had a boyfriend that I knew of, one of my friends on the football team. She was worried about taking it further with him. She wanted to amaze him. Be the best. That's what she was about you know. No one was better than Savannah" he smiled.

"How come she was making out with you if you knew she had a boyfriend" I asked.

Kendall shrugged. "I liked her. She was hot and the funnest girl I had ever known." He admitted.

"Fair enough, so what happened? Did her boyfriend find out?" I asked.

"No, Savannah wanted me to be her guinea pig... you know... have sex. But I refused. She was cool with that. She said I was sweet but dumb. A few days after I had turned her down she said she had met this other guy that was willing to go the whole way. She said he was older so she was excited to learn some 'amazing tricks'... those are her words, not mine" he explained.

"Truth is I wanted to fuck her, I was just so scared of doing it with the most popular girl in my year that I let her leave my house that night and go meet this other guy. She stood at my door dressed in this sexy little summer dress. She said she wore it for me, hoping that I would change my mind. I was so close to saying yes, but I just couldn't take control of it. The nerves kicked in and I was scared I was going to put her off if she saw me ... you know" he said

"Have a seizure?" I finished his sentance for him.

"Yeah that... so she kissed me goodbye at my door and left this beautiful smile imprinted on my brain. I was such a dick to let her go. Any way... She didn't turn up to school the next day to do our history presentation. It wasn't until the next day that I heard she was missing" he said wiping his eyes.

"Oh god..." I said now seeing where this was going.

"It took five more days before her body was found, turned out Savannah had failed to mention that the guy she met was over the internet. She met him, he drove her just 6 miles away from her home where he raped her, beat her and killed her. Her family had no idea she was talking to anyone online, neither did her friends... it was just me that knew she was going to meet up with this guy... just me Sheri, and I did nothing to stop it." He

said shaking his head.

"You weren't to know Kendall you were 15 years old. Did you tell the police that you saw her last?" I asked.

He shook his head. "No... I was too ashamed. I didn't want everyone knowing I had the power in my hands to of prevented it... she was so beautiful. I didn't tell anyone" he said.

"What about when you dated Mackenzie? Did you not tell her even?" I asked.

Kendall shook his head as fresh tears fell. "No I met Mackenzie at Savannah's funeral. There was no way I could tell her what I knew" he explained.

"Why not, I'm sure she would of understood" I soothed.

Again Kendall shook his head, "no chance... I couldn't tell Mackenzie because Savannah was her sister" he said.

The reality of Kendalls problems then hit me like a train wreck. The name calling, the hickeys, the terrible sex... "you do the things you do because if you had of done any of that with Savannah she would still be here? Kendy you can't live like that. It wasn't your fault" I assured him.

"The first thing I did when Mackenzie and I got together was make sure everyone knew she was mine. That's when I realised a love bite was a good mark to give. We then had sex. I didn't want her thinking the same stupid thing as her sister. We could be terrible at it together... and I was. I didn't have a clue what I was doing. If she ever dressed too sexy I really panicked, thinking some guy would get to her, quickest way to get her to change was to say something mean. She got pregnant in the end" he said looking at me to see my reaction.

"She told me" I admitted.

He gave me an apologetic look. "Once I found out about the baby I was so freaking scared Sheri, about what her mom would say, my mom... what Savannah would think if she was looking down on us... I couldn't think straight. The seizures were coming thick and fast. She was meant to come round my house one evening but she didn't show, I tried calling her, texting her, but her phone was off. I felt sure that she was dead. I just knew it. I went in to school the next day. She was there, bold as brass, not dead! but she told me she slipped and fell on the way to my house. She lost the baby... I was too busy being a pussy and having panic attacks that I made her walk, slip and lose my baby. That's two deaths on my conscience Sheri... that was the day I hit her. I didn't mean to... honestly. I loved her I was just so... relieved and heartbroken at the same time, I lashed out." he said now in complete pieces as he cried.

"Kendall... that's not true, you don't have any deaths on your conscience" I soothed.

"I just gathered that I had to keep the people I love close... I didn't mean to be such an ass hole. I just wanted to keep you safe" he cried.

I put my arm around his shoulder. "Kendall I think you need to talk with Mackenzie" I suggested.

"It won't do any good. She resents me." He replied.

Poor Kendall, I honestly understood exactly why he was the way he was. But I knew that Mackenzie hadn't slipped and fell. I knew that she had an abortion. I looked at Kendall wondering if now was a good time for him to know the truth, before I could open my mouth the nurse came back out of the double doors.

I stood up. The nerves to much for me to sit still.

"What's the news?" Kendall asked.

"The news is good" the nurse smiled.

My heart was doing somersaults of joy.


author note: thanks to musicrox14, gaby and oxybtrswag for the last chapters reviews. James will be back soon, Carlos dragged him away from the fight, but I'm sure news will soon spread about what's happened to poor old logie bear.

hopefully Kendall will be on a road to recovery too, not sure if Sheri telling him about the abortion will help matters though. let's hope whatever she does say makes him a bit more normal. thanks too everyone for reading. next chapter will be 30th aug.