A/N: Please read and review!
It
takes a couple seconds to say Hello, but forever to say Goodbye. . .
Chapter 29: Old memories and worries
Bella's POV:
*Flashback*
"No, I'm fine. I need something to keep me occupied," so I don't think. I added mentally. I opened the fridge. Nothing. I opened the cabinets. A small piece of paper fell to the ground. I bent down to pick it up. It was the note Edward wrote to tell my dad I was in the woods.
I fell the ground and started sobbing, without making any sound( Charlie would come in and find me like this and he will call mom to take me to Florida). I had a whole life ahead of me, but that means nothing now. My life and soul, my reason for existence, was taken when he left. When he told me that he didn't love me any more. The tears were blocking me from seeing anything. Some one walked in and saw me here, it was Charlie. He didn't call anybody though, he just came over and started rubbing my back.
"What happened?" He asked in a worried tone.
"I tripped and bumped my head." I lied. I took a hand that was helping hod me together and felt around for the small piece of paper I found. Charlie didn't notice when I moved slightly to put it in my back pocket.
* Back to reality, sort of. . .*
I couldn't handle it anymore. He is the whole reason I am here, the reason for my pain and suffering! Not only is he the cause of it but it is because it hurts to be away from him. I wrapped my arms around my torso, it hurt. I could feel the tears ripping through me and the razor blade, which is my empty heart digging into me. I couldn't feel anything but the stinging and burning of the pain inside me. It felt worse than being burned alive, more painful than anything you could have possibly lived through in the worst conditions imaginable. Always there, now it is growing and it is starting to consume me. I bit down on my lip hard so that I wouldn't scream. My world stopped the minute he left me, as if my life ended in six short pages then he was gone and now it was all crashing down on me. I feel weaker and lower than I have felt in a long time. . . I started sobbing, and fiercely shaking.
* Flashback!*
"Hello." He said in a quiet, velvet voice.
I looked up stunned that he was actually speaking to me. He was sitting as far away from me as the desk would allow, but his chair was angled towards me. His dazzling face was friendly, open, a slight smile on his flawless lips. But his golden eyes were careful.
"My name is Edward Cullen." He continued. "I didn't have a chance to introduce myself last week. You must be Bella Swan."
*End of flashback*
The first day we met, so close yet so far. I took him a minute to say hello, and now I am chasing after him, not wanting to let it go and say goodbye.
I could feel the tears starting to fall from my face. I love him with all my heart.
"Are you okay, Bella?" Alice asked me as she gave me a hug.
"Just old memories." I muttered. I wiped my eyes and looked up at her, for I had my head in my hands. "I'm as fine as I'll be now."
"Don't worry Bella, we'll take care of everything here fast." Emmett said with a playful smile on his face.
"I remember what happened last time you said that." I said and absent middlingly rubbed the crescent shaped scar on my hand. With that, Alice grabbed my hand and led me off the plane behind the rest of the Cullens. Alice forced me into the bathroom and I changed into a pair of black skinny jeans and sapphire blue dress shirt. She gave me a pair of black ballet slippers and then brushed through my knotted hair.
Alice, Carlisle, Esme, and I drove in a Chrysler 300m. While Rosalie, Emmett, and Jasper took the red convertible she borrowed from the pilot. There is an overcast all this week, which just made our plans easier. I didn't mind when Carlisle was driving, most of the time he went at a reasonable speed, but today Esme was driving. . . I know that they would never let anything happen to me. Alice was on the phone, with Jasper I presumed, for she kept telling whoever it was 'I love you'. Other than Alice the car was silent.
"How are you feeling, Bella?" Esme asked me in a soft motherly tone.
"Nervous, I guess." I answered.
"You have nothing to be nervous over." She replied.
"You know your future, it is with your soul mate, Carlisle. The love of my life left me and now I am pathetic enough to go after him. I have a lot to be nervous and worried about." I disagreed.
"Turn right in about 4 ½ miles." Alice instructed to Esme and Jasper I presumed, then shut her little black cellphone..
* flashback*
"Now," he breathed, "what exactly are you worrying about?"
"Well, um, hitting a tree-" I gulped-" and dying. And then getting sick."
He fought back a smile. Then he bent his head down and touched his cold lips to the hollow base of my throat.
"Are you still worried now?" He murmured against my skin.
* End of flashback.*
"Is this it?" Esme asked Alice.
"Yes it is." Alice answered. She turned to face me. "Bella when I give you the signal, you need to count to 10 then climb up those stairs and go through the door at the top ." Alice instructed and pointed to a old wooden staircase on the side of the yellow building.
I nodded but I could feel the butterflies in my stomach. I took in a deep breath. "What is the signal?" I finally asked.
"Here." She said and handed me a watch. "When it is time, it will go off."
"And then I count to ten and walk up the stairs and go through the door at the top." I finished. I felt like my head was about to explode.
Alice put her arm around me and I hugged her back. I was terrified, more than scared, everything I feared was nothing compared to this, except living without him that is. I tried to slow my breathing because it was starting to sound like I was hyperventilating.
Alice put her hone to her ear after dialing Jasper's number. " Lets go." She told him and hung up. She looked at me in the eyes. "Do what I said and it will all work out." With a quick kiss on my cheek she got out of the car and climbed up the stairs with Emmett and Jasper behind her.
A little quicker than I wished, my watch went off.
