A/n: Ugh, I'm sorry everyone. I usually try to update every day or so but I've been really tired the past couple days that I didn't even realize I hadn't updated in like three days. Sorry again.

Just a head's up, updates might be slow between monday and wednesday. I have a very tiring P.E. class on those days and they make too tired to really do much of anything.

Feel free to R&R


Sam awoke to the pleasant feel of warm skin pressed against his own, his arm draped over a slim waist. Recognition did not register very quickly as he basked in the long-missed feel of lying with a lover. His eyes stayed closed and he leaned his head down to nuzzle soft hair as he curled closer around his precious bedmate. Sleep-hazed memory didn't kick in until soft feathers brushed the skin of his arm.

The hunter's eyes snapped open and he simply lay stunned, looking at the tiny archangel he had cradled to his chest. He flushed brightly as he realized that their legs were tangled together and Gabriel was curled close to him for protection. Sam's heart ached as he stroked his lover's flank gently.

The word lover hadn't tasted so much like betrayal since Ruby. That was saying something considering all his relationships ended in either death or ruin. Still, he felt like crying for what he had done. Just because it was necessary didn't make it right.

"I'm so sorry, Gabriel." He whispered sorrowfully. His arm that lay trapped under the tiny angel curled about the smaller male protectively while his free hand came up to stroke Gabriel's bruised cheek gently.

Images of his angel writhing in pleasure beneath him filled his mind as he carded his fingers through his lover's soft tawny hair. He felt so selfish lying skin to skin with the smaller man. He should be climbing out of bed and getting dressed so that the intimate contact would not frighten Gabriel when he woke. Yet, Sam couldn't force himself to do it. His tiny lover's warm skin felt so wonderful, it was a sensation that Sam had not basked in for so long.

Moisture clung to lashes as he wrapped both arms around Gabriel. He pressed his nose to his angel's hair and sobbed pitifully. He didn't deserve this beautiful, broken creature that was sleeping in his arms.

"F-forgive m-me." He begged softly through his sobs, "I-I l-love you, I s-swear I do. P-please, forgive me."

Still struggling with everything, Sam pulled away slightly. It felt like agony, but Sam forced himself to untangle himself from Gabriel. His hands shook as he used the sheet to create a wall between their naked skin. He couldn't pull himself fully away from his tiny love due to the loneliness in his broken soul but he also couldn't stand the idea of Gabriel panicking when he awoke because their skin was touching.

"S-sam?" The stuttered question was barely a whisper as Sam finished separating them.

"Yeah, Sweetheart, I'm here." Sam somehow managed to keep his teary voice steady as he brushed a lock of hair behind Gabriel's ear.

"H-how are you f-feeling?" Gabriel's voice was shaky and scared as he quivered under Sam's touch. Sam sighed softly and carefully pulled his hand away.

"I-I feel a lot better, Gabe." Sam sniffled, untangling his arm from the angel, "I-it's easier to think now. T-thank you, G-gabriel."

"N-not like I had a c-choice b-but it was w-wor-!" Gabriel suddenly stopped mid-sentence in worry, "Sam, a-are you c-crying?" Ugh, Father, he hated being blind!

"'m fine, G-gabe." Sam mumbled quickly, wiping his tears away.

"No, you're not. Sammy, why're you crying, Kiddo?" Gabriel hesitantly reached up, blindly searching for Sam's face.

"I-it wasn't w-worth it, Gabe." Sam's lip quivered as Gabriel's hand finally cupped his jaw. More tears dripped down his already salt-stained cheeks as he leaned into the angel's touch, "Y-you weren't r-ready yet. You d-didn't want it, n-not really. A-and I r-raped you, t-to save m-myself."

"Y-you're always worth it, Sammykins." The anxiety-tinged conviction made a loud sob bubble up and get caught in Sam's throat.

Gabriel was wrong. How could something be worth it if it hurt someone you love. Sam had faced that lesson too many times to know that it was never worth it.

"S-sam? D-do you l-love me?" The question made Sam feel like he was shattering.

"Yes! O-of course, I-I do, Gabriel!"

"A-and you want me to b-be h-happy?" This time Gabriel only received a tear-filled mewl of acceptance."

"W-well, you being h-healthy makes me h-happy. I-I don't have a-anything else, S-sam… N-nothing left but you." Gabriel whispered weakly as he tiredly pulled himself towards Sam. His wings felt like dead weight dragging him down, sapping his strength. He tried desperately to ignore the ache pulling on his back muscles as he leaned in and gave Sam a faltering kiss.

Sam whimpered into the kiss and wrapped his arms around Gabriel. He desperately returned the closed-mouth kiss as he pulled his angel to him. He longed for them to be skin to skin once more, to lazily rest in his lover's heat and spend the day pleasuring the angel. But, it was not meant to be, so he'd take this simple chaste kiss as the gift of forgiveness that it was.

~*~z~*~

Dean took a deep breath to calm his rattled nerves as he crawled out of bed. Once off, he gently pulled the blanket up to cover his sleeping angel and tucked him in. After making sure that Cas was lost in his restoration doze, Dean straightened up and pulled away from the bed.

He swallowed thickly and went to his dresser. He picked up his duffle from where it sat beside the dresser and laid it on top. He carefully unzipped it and opened it up. He set his nerves as he began to pack up a few days-worth of clothes.

Once he was satisfied with that, he moved to his weapons cache. His stomach twisted uneasily as he grabbed several weapons and hid them in the bag. He took a calming breath as he pulled the gold jewelry from yesterday's jeans. He hid them in the duffle as well before zipping it back up.

He changed out of his pajamas and slunk back to the bed. He wrote a note on the notepad there and uneasily left it for Cas to find. He dragged his fingers through his spiky hair before bending down and lovingly kissing his angel's hair.

After whispering words of love into the angel's ear, he pulled back and hoisted up his duffle again. Dean frowned softly and stroked his boyfriend's damaged wings. His fingers trailed over the scars and down the beautiful dark feathers.

"I'm doing this for you, Cas." He whispered softly before pulling away again. He closed his eyes and turned towards the door. He fought the unease in his stomach and forced himself to leave.

~*~z~*~

"S-sam?" Gabriel asked nervously as he fidgeted with the comforter while Sam got dressed. The angel hated to admit it but the near constant buzz of anxiety under his skin had almost completely eased as soon as Sam got out of bed. What a pathetic disappointment he was!

"Yes, Gabe?" Sam's reply was a little wary sounding as he had not liked how nervous Gabriel was.

"H-how could you stand f-fucking me…?" The bluntness of the question caused Sam to freeze while he was buttoning up his shirt. Anger unfurled in his stomach, but it was his normal indignant anger rather than a Daisy Chain-induced one.

"What?"

"Y-you know, I'll understand if you want to go f-find a pretty girl to play around with." Gabriel continued on, not even hearing Sam's question, "I-I mean… L-last night w-wasn't so b-bad… I-I think I c-can handle b-being a s-stress relief p-pet now." Tears were clinging to Gabriel's eyelashes now as his fingers continued to worry the bedding as he kept talking.

"B-bet you could find a pretty g-girl to couple with. A-and I could go with you on l-long term hunts away from her, tide you over 'til you get back." It was taking everything Gabriel had not to let his tears fall, "I promise to b-behave. I-I'll be obedient, and I promise n-not to bother Dean and C-cassy while you're awa-!"

"Gabriel, shut up!" Sam was kneeling on the bed before they both even realized, hand clasped over Gabriel's mouth to make him stop, "Good lord, Gabe, what are you even talking about?!"

"M-my j-job." Gabriel replied in confusion once his mouth was uncovered, "I promise to be a good pet. I've been a-around a long time, S-sammy. I-I know some fun tricks to get you off while you're away from your g-girl."

"Stop, stop, just stop right there!" Sam feels about fifty shades of confused right about now. He didn't understand how they got here. He understands that Gabriel's mind is most likely fractured after last night but he still doesn't get how this conversation started, "What on earth are you rambling about, Gabe? What girl?! Why am I getting a girl?"

"Isn't it obvious? A cute kid like you, marries some pretty bird, and has a couple kids of your own." The longer the angel talks about it, the more broken he begins to sound.

"Why can't I just be with you?!"

"B-because I'm just the filthy bitch on the least, good for a quick f-fuck, S-sam-a-lam!" Sam felt sick again, something had broken in Gabriel's head, "They didn't train and gangrape me so I come become the perfect husband. They did it to teach me how to spread my legs whenever you needed to waste some time!" Sam was finding it hard to breathe, vision going blurry. What had he done?! Gabriel was practically back at square one but he was actually worse now!

"N-no. No, t-that's not true, Gabe?" Sam pleaded, hand gently covering Gabriel's mouth again. He felt wrong inside, he didn't want to hear any more of what Gabriel had to say, "I love you. O-only you, only w-want you."

"Don't kid yourself, Sammy." Gabriel whispered once he was released again, "Whores are fun to play with, but no one actually wants something that filthy as a spouse." Sam's spirit was shattering, he was having a hard time swallowing down the bile in his throat. He gulped in breaths as he steeled himself for what he had to do next.

"Gabriel, stop talking." Gabriel's jaw clicked shut as the command kicked in through the Daisy Chain. Sam settled into a more secure sitting position on the bed before he shakily dragged the angel into his lap. He cradleed him close to his chest, nose buried in Gabriel's soft hair before sobbing.

"I-I'm so s-sorry, Gabe. I-I'll fix this, f-fix you."

~*~Chapter End~*~