Ennis stood there stupidly for a moment, blinking in shocked confusion. My brother? Whose brother? I have a brother? "Uh…my brother?" he repeated, then squeezed his eyes shut. Way to sound like the world's biggest asshole, Del Mar. "K.E.?"

The man on the other end…who'd introduced himself as Ken, Ennis's brain reminded him,…chuckled. "Yeah, cept nobody calls me that, since I cain't get mixed up with Dad no more. Jus Ken will be fine."

"Well, all right," Ennis said, fumbling for the appropriate response to an out-of-the-blue phone call from a relative he hadn't spoken to in nearly twenty years. Two thoughts were chasing each other around his head. The first was he wants money. The second, more insistent, was does he know?

"I bet yer surprised ta hear from me," Ken said.

Ennis swallowed hard. I'll let ya know when my heart starts beatin again. "Well, surprised…yeah, I sure am. Been how long?"

"Almos twenty years. Since you n Alma got married. How's she doin, by the way??"

Ennis exhaled. He didn't know. Didn't even know he and Alma were divorced. "We, uh…split up back in 75."

"Oh, that's a real shame. Sorry ta hear that. Split up with Barbara myself. Just a couple years back."

"Sorry bout that," Ennis managed, while his brain raced, trying to keep one step ahead. "So…what's this about, K…uh, Ken? How'd ya get my number here?" Oh shit, did he talk ta Alma? No, he cain't a done, idiot, she'd a sure told him we was divorced and probly a few other things, too.

"Well, it's kinda strange. One a those small-world things. I, uh…had me some tough times after the divorce, and finally got a steady gig bout six months ago, as a salesman fer this outfit what sells leather goods fer ranchers. Ya know…saddles, bridles, chaps, that kinda thing."

"Sure."

"So I'm at this trade show over in Syracuse last week, and I run inta this guy who when he hears my name, asks me if I'm related ta Ennis Del Mar, ranches over in Vermont. I say, that's my brother's name, but it cain't be him, cause he lives in Wyoming. Guy said he didn't know nothin about that, but it ain't no kinda common name, and that this Ennis ran a place called Brokeback Ranch, which put me in mind a that mountain out past Signal. Thought it mighta been you after all, and…well, I guess it was."

"Guess so," Ennis said, gradually relaxing. It was clear that his brother knew nothing of his circumstances, just his name and where he was. Goddamn, fuckin K.E. Ennis had all but given up on having contact with his own siblings ever again, given the length of time since they'd spoken and their likely reaction to his lifestyle. He'd had to be content with the family he'd made for himself: his girls, and Jack. Still, now and then he felt a vague yearning for the ones who'd known him as a child, the only ones who truly understood what those years had been like and had gone through what he had. No matter their disagreements or hardships, that was a common thread that he sometimes missed. Much as the idea terrified him, the possibility of re-establishing contact with his older brother tugged at him. "Well, hell!" he said, allowing himself to smile a little. "This sure is a surprise."

Ken chuckled. "I know it is. Been too long. I, uh…guess we both let ourselves get on in years, didn't we?"

"Yep. Time flies by."

"I hate ta say it, but…well, Barbara weren't never too keen on me talkin ta you or Merle, and it was jus easier not ta argue."

"I been there."

"Guess so. But she ain't in the picture no more, and I guess it don't matter now."

"Guess not." Ennis wasn't sure where this was all going, and he was almost afraid to ask.

"I spose it's kinda weird ta just call ya up outta the blue."

"Well, what should you a done? Sent a letter first askin permission? It's okay," Ennis said.

"I gotta say, I didn't think you'd be this receptive."

I'm jus fuckin relieved ya don't know I'm queer. "Why'd ya think that?"

"Dunno. Thought ya might be mad I ain't called ya up in twenty years."

"Well, I guess that ain't all on you, is it? Phone lines go both ways."

Ken laughed. "That they do, little brother." There was an awkward pause. "Well…it's nice ta hear yer voice. Ya sound okay. You, uh…doin all right out there?"

"Yeah. We're doin real well, actually."

"This guy I met, said he only talked to ya but once, but said yer ranch is real successful."

Ennis stiffened a little. He wants money. "We're makin a go of it."

"That's real good, then." Ken cleared his throat. "Ya got married again, I guess?"

Ennis shut his eyes. "Uh…yeah, sure did." Don't ask me no more about that jus now till I catch my fuckin breath.

Happily, that seemed to be the end of his brother's curiosity about that. "Glad ta hear it."

"You?"

"Aw, hell no. Still kinda busted up after the last one. Tell ya the truth, Ennis…I was some kinda mess. Drinkin n stuff."

Ennis sat down, feeling a surge of empathy for this man he'd once known well, his still-familiar voice telling Ennis more with its cracks and trembles than his understated assessment of his own troubles. "I been there myself."

"Cleanin up now. My gig's goin real good."

"Glad ta hear that. What about yer kids?"

"Well, my boy's grown up and in college back in Laramie. My girl's graduatin high school, she's with her ma. I see em when I can. Ya got kids? Seems like I heard ya had a girl, way back when."

"I got two girls. My oldest, Junior…she lives here with me, she's goin ta school up Middlebury. My second, Francine, she's back in Gillette with her ma who's married again." He left it at that.

"It's a blessin ta have yer girl with ya, I reckon."

"Ain't that the truth."

Ken hesitated, then sighed. "Well, Ennis, talkin's okay, but I sure wouldn't mind seein ya, and that ranch ya got."

Ennis took a deep breath. Keep it vague. "Yer welcome ta come visit," he said, hoping that such a hypothetical visit might take place months in the future to give everyone time to prepare. His suspicion that his brother wanted money was fading, as he hadn't hinted as much, but there were so many other considerations here.

"I was hopin ya might say that. See…my trade show's done, and I got another one down in Kentucky in a week, and the bosses don't want ta bring me back ta Cheyenne just ta fly me out again, so I got a week ta kill. I thought…maybe…I could come down there now? Pay a call? I know it's sudden n short notice, but it ain't like I knew you was there ta give more notice. Just met this guy the day before last and couldn't do nothin till after the show was done."

Ennis slumped, one hand going to his eyes. Oh, Christ. Never rains but it fuckin pours. "Well…yeah, that is real sudden…" I oughta tell him now. Maybe make him not wanta come at all. As this thought passed through Ennis's mind, a wave of disappointment followed it, and close on its heels the realization that he actually wanted his brother to come. Despite the many difficulties such a visit would entail, he wanted to see him. And he wanted him to see what Ennis had done, and built…and who he'd built it with. He hadn't given much thought to re-establishing a connection with his brother, but now that the possibility had been dropped into his lap, it called to something inside of him that he'd let die from misuse. "But I'd sure like ta see ya," he finished.

He heard his brother sigh a little, like he was relieved Ennis wasn't refusing him outright. "That's awful charitable a you, Ennis. Ain't like I done much t'earn yer welcome."

"Hey, I ain't been Brother a the Year neither," Ennis said. "Didn't even know you n Barbara split up."

"Yeah," Ken said. "Well…guess I ain't quite used ta livin on my own yet. Gets…kinda lonesome, ya know."

Boy, do I ever. And I bet you ain't got no blue-eyed rodeo cowboy ta come n save yer sorry ass from it like I had. "Yeah, I was lonesome after me n Alma split, too." Ennis said, then wished he could take it back. Surely that'd lead into questions about his current spouse…her name, how they'd met…questions he didn't know how to answer quite yet. "I mean, only saw my girls once a month, if that."

"Was you still doin ranch work then?"

"Yeah. One bullshit job after another."

"Sounds like you the bossman now, huh?"

"Yep. Some days I'd rather be one a the hands. Less paperwork."

Ken laughed heartily at that, more than the remark really deserved. "Damn, Daddy'd be proud a you, Ennis. Ownin yer own spread, like he always wanted ta do, makin a go of it. Wish he was around ta see it. Then, I guess he can see everythin from heaven, cain't he?"

Ennis bit his lip. I hope not. And I ain't so sure that's where he is, neither. "Guess so," was all he said.

"How long you been out here?"

"Goin on eight years now."

"You meet yer wife out there? Or is she somebody I might know from home?"

Ennis shut his eyes. I'm sorry, darlin…I jus gotta buy some time. "Naw, you don't know her."

"Be glad ta meet her, then."

"Oh, uh…she ain't here. She's back West takin care a her mamma, who's been poorly. Be gone till next week." That much, at least, was the truth. The word "she" rasped on his tongue like a dry wooden spoon, sending shudders across his shoulders.

"Oh, ain't that a shame. What's her name, then?"

Ennis could stomach a bit of a temporary pronoun switch but he couldn't bear to invent some fake name like Susie or Margaret to plaster over Jack's like a coat of whitewash on a weather-beaten fence. "When would you be wantin ta come out, then?" Ennis asked, going for the abrupt subject change in lieu of answering.

"Well…I made a coupla appointments with clients fer this afternoon and tomorrow. How far is it ta where you are?"

Ennis thought for a moment. "From Syracuse? About four and a half hours, I reckon."

"Got appointments till four tomorrow. What if I were ta leave the day after tomorrow, in the mornin? Get there after lunch?"

That would put him at the ranch on Saturday. Ennis glanced at the calendar. According to their get-a-lawyer plan, Jack would be due back home next Thursday or Friday. That would leave time for…well…shit. Ennis's head was spinning. His old instinct was telling him to use his day's grace to turn around all the photos of Jack in the house, make up a nice fake history for his nonexistent wife, greet K.E., spin some fairy stories that wouldn't rock the boat none, and get him out before Jack's return.

No. I swore I wasn't gonna hide no more. I ain't pretendin there ain't no Jack. Be like pretendin the sun don't set or cowshit don't stink. It'd hurt too damned much ta act like he don't exist. Cain't do that ta him, even if he ain't here. I jus gotta get ahold a myself here. And I gotta talk ta Jack about this. Right the fuck now.

"Uh…yeah, I'm lookin on the calendar here, and that looks jus fine. It's a quiet time round here, jus finished up with the calvin. Good time fer guests."

"Well, that's jus fine, then. I'm real glad yer amenable, Ennis. I gotta say it, uh…took me some time ta work up the nerve ta pick up the phone."

"Why?"

"Thought ya might have harsh feelins towards me."

"Why'd ya think somethin like that?"

"Well, cause I ain't kep in touch, and I kinda left ya ta fend fer yerself once I got married, never even checked up ta see if you were doin okay…"

"I was grown up. Wasn't yer job ta look out fer me."

"Was, though. Daddy always said was up ta me ta make sure you n Merle was all right."

"You still talk ta her?"

"Now n then. She's been sayin we oughta look you up fer a few years now. Sayin ain't the same as doin, though. She's all right. Still lives in Casper with her husband, he's some kinda factory manager now, makes good money. Got three real nice kids."

Ennis nodded, this information striking him at yet another neglected center of family connection he was surprised to find slumbering inside. Three nieces or nephews he'd never seen or met. Sister and brother-in-law living what sounded like a nice little life, a life he could have been a part of if he'd cared to pick up a phone. Jack had needled him about getting in touch with his siblings on occasion, but a retort about Jack not calling his parents usually closed the subject. He supposed with the Twist family on something approaching harmonious terms now he didn't have any more excuses. "Glad ta hear it," he said. "Maybe someday we can have ourselves a little reunion," he said. Who you fuckin kiddin? Soon's you tell them the truth they gonna forget they ever had a brother name a Ennis.

"That'd be nice," Ken said, and Ennis could hear in his voice a little twinge of the yearning that had surprised Ennis's own heart. Maybe his relatively recent divorce had made Ken want to reach out, he thought. It'd had the opposite effect on Ennis himself, but not everyone was the same. "So…ya wanna gimme the directions ta yer place, then?"

"Sure enough," Ennis said. He waited for Ken to get a pencil and paper and rattled off the directions, his mind already running ahead to what he'd say to Jack and how the hell he'd tell Ken the truth. You oughta jus tell him now. Spare him the trip. Ridiculous ta make him come all the way here jus so's you can tell him yer queer and he can turn right around and go back. "So, guess we'll be seein ya sometime Saturday afternoon, then?"

"I'll give a ring when I'm leavin town, so's ya know when t'expect me."

"That'd be jus fine."

"Lookin forward to it, Ennis."

Ennis nodded, although his anticipation was mostly of the dread variety. "Same here."

He didn't even bother to hang up. He just depressed the toggle and dialed Jack's hotel from memory. Just about nine o'clock out there…maybe catch him before he leaves fer the day. The phone rang and rang, but there was no answer. "Would you like to leave a message, sir?" the desk clerk said.

"Yes," Ennis said, for once not caring about how it would look for him to leave a personal message for another man. "Tell him ta call home right away, it's urgent. Oh…make sure'n tell him ain't nothin wrong, don't want him ta worry. Jus that Ennis needs ta talk ta him."

"Ennis?"

"That's right. E-n-n-i-s. Ya got that?"

"Yes, sir."

"Thanks." He hung up and sat there staring at the phone for a moment before finally rising with a rueful headshake. He ain't callin in the next five minutes, dumbass. Go about yer day and try ta keep a clear head, fer Christ's sake.



Jack came back to the hotel after having lunch with his mother; he had some phone calls to make. As he passed through the lobby, the clerk hailed him. "Mr. Twist!" He detoured over to the desk.

"Yeah?"

"You have a message." She handed him a slip of paper, which read Call home immediately. Jack's heart plummeted. Oh, mother of God, what now? The clerk saw his expression. "Oh, he said I ought to tell you that nothing's wrong, just that Ennis needs to speak to you."

That made him feel marginally better, but still a bit alarmed at what could have moved Ennis to leave an honest-to-God message that tacitly spoke of the closeness of their relationship with an actual human desk clerk. "Thanks," he muttered, and hurried off for the elevator.

He was dialing the phone before he'd gotten his coat all the way off. "Brokeback Ranch, it's Liz."

"It's Jack, Lizzie, is…"

"I'll get him, he's out in the shed. Hang on." He heard a clunk as she dropped the receiver on the desk, then far-off mumbled voices as she called him on the short-wave. "He's on his way," Liz said. "I'll leave you to talk."

"What the hell is all this?" Jack demanded.

"I better let Ennis explain. It's nothing bad…I don't think. Don't panic." She put the receiver down again and Jack sat there, impatiently drumming his fingers as he waited for Ennis to return to the house and pick up the line.

"Jack?" Ennis finally said, coming on the line, sounding a little out of breath.

"Ennis, what's goin on?"

"Hoo, you ain't gonna believe it," he said. Jack could hear him doffing his coat and taking a seat.

"Will ya jus fuckin tell me?"

"My brother called."

"Yer…yer brother? K.E.?"

"Yeah, cept he's goin by Ken these days. He's got some job in ranch sales and ran inta somebody at a trade show what knew me, and asked if we was related. He didn't even know I was livin out here, so he called me up."

"And…does he…"

"Naw, he don't know nothin. He's gonna come visit."

"Visit?" Jack exclaimed. "You don't hear from him fer twenty years and all at once he's comin ta visit?"

"Day after tomorrow. Jack, I don't know what ta do."

"You didn't tell him, did you?"

"No, not on the phone. But Jack, don't you worry none. I am gonna tell him the truth right away. I promised ya I wasn't gonna hide it no more and I mean ta stick ta that. Even if it means he turns right around and walks right out that door, he's gonna know the truth, I swear."

Jack sighed. He's sayin that cause he knows that's what I'd want. I'd want him to stand before his brother, one of his only kin left, and tell him that he's gay and that he's got a partner name a Jack Twist, and show him my picture and tell him that he's crazy in love with me and that he don't give a shit what his brother thinks or says and that if he don't like it he can just go fuck himself.

He shut his eyes tight. Maybe that's what he wanted, but that might not be what was best. Maybe there'd been a time when he'd have needed Ennis to say those things, just to know that he would, but that time was past. He took a deep breath. "Ennis?"

"What?"

"Don't tell him."

There was a long pause. "What?"

"Ya heard me. Don't tell him. Not right away."

"But…Jack…I cain't lie…"

"Yes, ya can. Fer a little while."

"I don't…why…" Ennis sighed. "I'm so fuckin confused."

Jack sat back in the desk chair and collected his thoughts. "Darlin, it means a lot ta me that yer so set on tellin him. Ya come so far, and I know part of it is that ya think that I'd want ya ta tell him about us. I ain't sayin I don't want ya to, but…maybe it ain't such a good idea ta hit him with it right outta the gate. I mean, it's yer fuckin brother, Ennis. I know what that means. Might be that it's yer last chance ta get ta know him, and have any kinda family feelin again. I know you've missed that some."

"Yeah," Ennis said quietly.

"So could be we oughta take a step back and think about this. Ain't like I'm there fer him ta wonder who the hell I am. Give ya some breathin room."

"Breathin room?"

"Yeah. Talk ta him. Feel him out some. Jus try n get a sense a what he's like. So's ya might know what kinda reaction yer likely ta get, ya know?"

Silence. Jack could almost see Ennis back home, chin sunk down on his chest, considering this. "Well…he might be less inclined ta fly off the handle if he's been around fer a coupla days."

"This is what I'm sayin. Work up to it." A thought struck him. "What'd you already tell him, anything?"

"Well, he asked if I was married again, I said yes. Didn't ask too much more about that, cept I said that my…uh, wife…was off takin care a her sick mamma."

Jack chuckled. "All the times folks called me yer wife in jest, never thought I'd hear you doin it yerself."

"Felt weird. Didn't like sayin it."

"Well, I sure's hell hope it felt weird."

"Jus didn't wanta get into it over the phone."

"Yeah, I get that. But…ya get what I'm sayin?"

"I get it, I jus cain't believe yer actually sayin it. Yer actually tellin me ta hide it."

"He's jus about the last a yer family, Ennis, at least the one you were born with. Be a shame ta lose that jus cause we didn't exercise a bit a restraint." He hesitated, playing idly with the phone cord. "Ta be honest? The fact that you wanted ta tell him, that's enough fer me. I don't need ya ta prove nothin ta me. Feel like we're past all that, specially after the time we had here, don't you?"

"Yeah, I do. Jus…didn't want ya ta get the idea I was still…ya know. Ashamed."

"I know. Means a lot ta me that you were willin. But that ain't no reason ta just dump it on him the minute he walks in the door. Might be that he'd be more…receptive…after y'all have gotten ta know each other a bit."

"And what if I get ta know him and find out that he's a hard-hearted, queer-hatin bastard?"

"Well…let's not go lookin fer trouble."

"We never do, but it seems ta find us jus fine on its own."

"We'll talk about that if it happens. One thing at a time."

"Christ, Jack. We ain't had one thing at a time happen ta us since I don't know when."

"You got that right. Half the time I'm as nervous as a long-tailed cat in a room fulla rockin chairs, jus waitin fer the next calamity ta visit itself on us. Not that yer brother's a calamity," he hastened to add.

"He might be. Don't know."

"How'd he sound on the phone?"

"Hard ta say. Sounded kinda…okay, actually. Said he'd had some drinkin troubles, his marriage broke up. Maybe that he's wanting ta rebuild some bridges."

"That's good. If he had his own troubles, might make it harder ta judge you."

"Got the feeling he was afraid he'd call and I'd tell him ta go fuck himself. Was relieved that I didn't."

"Hmm. Well, maybe it'll all be fine."

He heard Ennis snort. "Yeah. When I tell him, he'll clap me on the back and we'll all dance around the fuckin maypole and pick flowers and he'll whip out a guitar and sing songs about his queer brother."

Jack blinked. "Damn. Where'd that come from?"

"I'm just tired a the fuckin suspense, always wonderin how folks is gonna react, if we oughta tell em, if we oughta keep quiet, if it shows, if they're hatin on us behind closed doors. It ain't fuckin right, Jack!"

"Hey, yer preachin ta the choir here! I know it ain't right, but yer the one always tellin me that it's the way a the world and we jus gotta suck up and deal with it."

"I don't know bout you, but I could sure use a couple less things ta deal with."

"Yeah." Jack sighed, letting his head fall back. "I wish I was there ta help ya, but maybe it's best I ain't."

"Never thought I'd be glad that ya weren't around. But only cause a that."

"I sure cain't wait ta be back in yer bed, cowboy."

"Well, that's yer rightful place, ain't it?"

"Sure is."

"And no brother a mine's gonna keep ya from it. Coupla days, he'll know everythin and if he cain't deal, then that's too fuckin bad."

Jack nodded. "That would be too bad," he said, echoing Ennis's words without the bravado he'd put on them.

Ennis was quiet for a moment. "Yeah, it would be. Hope it don't come ta that."

"Me too."

"Well…best be getting back ta work. Thanks fer callin back."

"Ya did make it sound pretty urgent."

"I know. Hope I didn't startle ya none."

"Little. It's okay." Jack smiled. "I love you, Ennis."

"Mm," Ennis said, and Jack could see his head bowing, cheeks coloring. "Love ya too." He hung up.

Jack set the phone down. His brother. Christ on a cracker. What next?