Bold = Demon & Akatsuki members turned dogs

Italic = thoughts

Bold Italic = Inner


They looked at me warily, "What do you want?" and I smirked. I grinned Uzumaki style before answering, "I want you to henge into a pack of dogs when in the company of others.".

Simultaneously there was three protests, "What the fucking hell?" "What?" "Not for all the money in the world!", before I held up a hand for silence. I looked at the three, "Its the perfect plan. I live with the Inuzukas, I'm one of three jounin on Team Kakashi with a man with a summoning contract with dogs, and this is not the first time I would be bringing home strays. Really if you have any information on me, you would know that I seem to have this habit of picking up 'strays', or people/animals who seem to have to need that little bit of affection to reach another level or be happy. Naruto, Neji, and others fit that description.". I smile softly, "When I came to Konoha, I had with me a pack of animals. Cereberus and Angel settled down with each other, Kibou settled down with Kiba's dog Akamaru, and Leon settled down with one of the Inuzuka's dogs. Kyo and Mystica settled down with each other while Night and Shinbashi also settled down with each other. All of them have at least one litter of animals. They don't go with me anymore, but are ready for the time they're needed." before I hear three soft sighs.

"I'll do it." "Fine." "Fuck you, but okay." were their answers. After some complicated hand signs and about ten minutes of moving quickly, three dogs stood in front of me.

Didn't think they agree to it so quickly.

True . . . makes you wonder if your argument was that good or they just couldn't think of a better plan.

Haven't heard from you in while, I was partially hoping you were gone.

So mean, so mean. If I could leave permanently I would. Do you think I like sharing a body?

Haven't thought of it that way.

Ookami: I'm just happy you turned them into dogs.

Neko: Of course you are, I wanted a feline, thank you!

Less suspicion with dogs. I live with Inuzuka's remember?

Ookami: How could I forget? Magnificent clan.

Neko: Seriously, how could I forget? I have to live with him remember.

I was pulled out of my musing with a bite to my leg. A silver dog with pink-ish purple eyes, otherwise known as Hidan, was attached via teeth to my leg. He glared at me, literally communicating with his eyes, 'What the fucking hell are you fucking doing just fucking standing there?'. I looked at him before looking at Kakuzu, "It's hard to have a conversation with yourself, an inner being stuck in the same body as you, and two bijuu without looking crazy. I can't help, but, be distracted when they start talking.".

I looked down at the three of them, Kakuzu was a dark brown with red whites and green pupil-less irises, while Sasori was crimson red with brown-jade eyes. I smirked, might as well have fun with this, "Hidan, you will be known as Jashin-" he started barking happily, doing a little dance, "Kakuzu, you will be known as Ryo-" that elicited a happy response, he liked being called money, " And Sasori, you will be known as Firecracker.". Sasori didn't really have a response, but I saw Hidan - I mean Jashin - snicker at him.

I snapped my fingers, suddenly remembering that I had been gone for some time, "We need to head back puppies.". The three didn't look happy with me on the nickname, but grudgingly followed as I ran back to Team Kakashi.

Kakashi was the first to notice my new puppies and I gave him a smirk, "What? I found puppies! My puppies are all grown up and settled down, I got lonely!". I saw three people sweat-drop at my attitude before Sai asked, "Where's the akatsuki?". I whistled innocently before looking at Yamato and Kakashi, "Dead as a doornail." and they nodded, they knew that they would find no body. Sai cocked his head at me, "Body?" and I gave him a sadistic Uzumaki grin, "Gone, literally nothing left.". He looked confused, "We saw no battle." and I sighed and acted like I was speaking to a child, "Do you know rank I am?" and he shook his head, confused. I look at Kakashi and Yamato, "Higher than them in the food chain, and that jutsu you saw has a special property other than severally annoying me when it burns/melts some of my clothes. It's a full body chidori and even with five hearts, you don't last long. It's become a signature move of mine, much like the Kage Bushin is Naruto's.".

They shrugged when Sakura gasped, "You're hurt!", I looked down and saw I had given myself a good-sized burn on my stomach without feeling it. I pouted and shook my fist in the sky, "I thought I fixed that, dammit, now you had and go give me another wound! Tsunade won't let me leave a ROOM without her express permission for a MONTH! I JUST convinced her that I should go out on missions!". I saw everyone, but Sai, face fault at my comment. Even my puppies. I sighed before placing a hand on stomach, channeling healing chakra to my hand. A green glow encompassed my hand as my wound started to heal quickly. I saw Sakura and Yamato looking on curiously, "Comes as a side effect to being a jinchurukii. You heal far quicker than normal, usually annoying somebody with it.". It didn't take long for the burn to heal and we were soon off.

The way back to Konoha was quiet, other than Naruto's and Sai's curiosity about my puppies. Sasori kept trying to freak/scare Sakura, Hidan liked trying to bite Naruto and Sai, and Kakuzu kept trying to steal everyone's money. Kakashi even made a comment that my puppies were demon dogs with the way they were acting. And of course, I was trying to keep them in line . . . half of the time . . . a third of the time . . . a quarter of the time. I couldn't help it, it was funny and so I let my teammates get tortured by dogs.

On our way to report to Tsunade, I could hear people snickering at my teammates as my puppies terroized them, one even called out, "You've trained them well! Nice to see Hatake paying attention for once.". Kakashi darkly glared at them and eventually Tsunade, but it was to no avail since Hidan was attached to his leg. She kept snickering as he gave the mission report before dismissing them, "So anything else you'd like to add?". I shrugged, "I took care of the akatsuki member, Kakuzu. You know, I'm a really big target with the akatsuki, possibly more than Naruto. It would probably be for Konoha's best interest if I left the village for a short time on a mission, nothing too important, but nothing boring.". Tsunade sighed before taking a swing of sake, "Dammit Ookami-Neko, can you for once NOT manage to make yourself a target? How many mission reports have I read that you put yourself in harm's way to protect somebody else. Naruto, me, Jiraiya, Kakashi, Yamato, Sasuke, Neji, Chouji, Lee, Sakura, Gaara. Countless people, countless times. Stop trying to be a matyr! You know as well as I do that Gaara is going to be pissed at me, you and whoever hurt you if you die!".

I had momentarily forgotten about Gaara when I realized that I hadn't made much contact with him in a while. I smacked my hand to my forehead before I began banging my head against the wall.

Damn! Damn! DAMN! I totally forgot . . .

What?

Anniverary of our first meeting is soon.

And that is important how?

*mumble* I'm-going-on-a-date-with-Gaara *mumble*

Neko: FINALLY!

Ookami: A little dramatic there, sister?

Neko: She goes on a date and I go on a date with Shu-kun!

Ookami: . . .

. . .

. . .

Well's that's going to be awkward.

Ookami: Understatement of the year. *Sarcastic*

Why are you going on a date with Shukaku?

Neko: Because you're going on a date with Gaara and it's the perfect time.

Not wanting to be rude, no wait, I do. But a certain blonde bimbo is trying to get us to stop banging our head against the wall.

I blinked my eyes, suddenly stopping in my destruction of the wall with my head to see Tsunade looking at me oddly, "What was that all about?". I grinned nervously, rubbing the back of my head, "You people try to have a conversation in your head and see how well you can function." before grabbing my puppies and leaving quickly out the window.

XxXxX With Hidan, Kakuzu, and Sasori XxXxX

Hidan: Is it just me or that chick fucking crazy?

Sasori: Probably

Kakuzu: I don't really care either way as long as she doesn't snap and try to kill us.

Sasori: *raising an eyebrow* Us?

Kakuzu: *flustered* I meant me.

Hidan and Sasori: Uh-huh *Sarcastic*

XxXxX Back to the humans XxXxX

I looked down at my puppies, having stopped at my customary training ground, "Why do I get the feeling that I was the subject of a conversation between you three?". They all gave me innocent looks before I had the promotion that Naruto was coming towards me in 3.6 seconds.

I side-stepped to the left as he tried to hug me while suddenly stopping, making him fall flat on his face, "Hello Naruto. I see you played chicken with the ground.". Sakura snickered as she came towards me slower, "I see you lost that game Naruto.". I looked at her, contemplating how much to tell her about my new 'mission' when I see a hawk I would recognize anywhere.

I paled slightly and looked at the two, "I have to go somewhere. Tsunade gave me a new mission, I'll be back in a few weeks. Got to go pack!". Normally I would feel bad about lying to them, and by the look Sakura gave me, she didn't completely believe me, but I needed to leave immediately. So I ran some distance into the woods, my puppies following obediently, raising my arm in the air so the hawk could land.

The dogs looked at me curiously while I read what the message said, I assumed it was important, Sasuke would never risk us being caught for less. I smirked at Sasori, "My contact has almost caught up with Weasel, and Explosives is nearby.".


A/N: I just want to say that my computer troubles are at temporarily gone! My internet access is a little fuzzy occasionally, but I figured out the trick to get it to work with me. I hope you enjoy this chapter, and for those you don't remember or don't understand, Itachi is Weasel and Deidara is Explosives. I call Itachi, Weasel, because its a play off his name, since it MEANS weasel. Deidara, because, well, it fits. I could call him blondie, or girlie, but Explosives sounds better. As always, please review!