A/N: I hope this doesn't come across as repetitive, because I mean it sincerely every time: THANK YOU for all your lovely comments about this fic. I am constantly walking on air!

I'd like to say a huge thank you to Sherry, who dedicated a piano cover of Jiyuu no Tsubasa to me on YouTube - omg, thank you! I have linked to it on my Tumblr (which is now kuni-masks) under the tag #amazing gifts from amazing people.

Also, I've set up an eruri themed giveaway as thank you for 1000 kudos for this fic on AO3. You can find the giveaway on my Tumblr (tagged #masks giveaway) - it will run until the end of July.

This chapter was running very long, so I have split it into two smaller chapters (9000 words each). Both halves are going up at the same time as chapter 29 & 30!

Previous chapter: At the Council meeting, Lord Martin Sahlo shows he's not going down without a fight; he demands a delay until summer for the Wall Maria reclamation effort, pushing Erwin to do another silo expedition instead. Erwin decides to pretend to go along with Sahlo's mission, but secretly stock 2 of the remaining 4 checkpoints on the path to Wall Maria. Levi attends a dinner party, where Sahlo confronts him with some strange statements. Erwin & Levi go at it for a bit, then agree to cut down their personal time so they can successfully plan around Sahlo's manoeuvering.


-29-

Walls (Part 1)

"What about Pehr?" asked Mike.

Erwin's chest rumbled with a hum of consideration.

"He's busy enough with logistics," said Levi, snuggling back against the rumble. The Commander had his legs stretched across the couch, and his Captain sat between them, leaning back against his chest. Erwin's arms encircled him, holding the file on Levi's lap where they could both read it.

"Pehr's been training Johanna," said Mike, stretching his long legs out across the couch opposite them. He lifted a piece of note paper, studying it - or at least, he seemed to be. His fringe was so long right now that it was difficult to tell where he was looking. "She's ready for straight-forward missions like this one. Transition her to logistics and promote Pehr to Squad Leader."

"I still think Nanaba's a better choice." Erwin's words puffed the top of Levi's hair, warm and gentle. "I'd rather have two people on logistics in case one of them falls during the push."

Mike shook his head. "Nanaba's too reliant on superiors, doesn't have enough initiative. If not Pehr, then Dita or Eld."

A knock sounded at the door. Levi turned to look at Mike, waiting for him to sniff out the knocker's identity.

"It's Hange and Moblit," said Mike.

Good. Then Levi didn't have to leave Erwin's arms. "You're late," he called. "Come in."

The door slammed open, and Hange rushed into the room. Moblit followed close behind, closing and locking the door behind them.

Hange's voice boomed through the room: "Erwin, please reconsider. The new weaponry will enable us to-"

"No," said Erwin.

"Please, just listen."

"I've listened enough times. The answer is still no."

Moblit flopped onto a chair next to Mike; the Squad Leader leaned in close, sniffing. "Breakfast drinks?"

"It's only breakfast if you sleep first," said Moblit dully.

"At least let me take Mike's place tomorrow," said Hange, getting louder. "I have a theory about the-"

"Hange, I forbid it." Erwin shifted, indicating he wanted to get up.

Levi grumbled, reluctantly moving to the end of the couch. The air felt chilly without Erwin's body heat, even though sunlight streamed in through the window.

The Commander stood and stretched, then paced over to his desk. Hange followed like a dog seeking food scraps.

"Erwin, you keep putting it off, keep putting it off... We're only going to be able to reclaim Wall Maria if we understand our enemy."

"We understand enough. Capturing a titan is too dangerous, at this point in time. We need every available soldier for our reclamation effort." Erwin selected a file and turned to face the distraught Squad Leader. "Once we move beyond the reclamation effort and focus on exterminating the titans, your research will become invaluable. We'll revisit this then." He held out the file. "This is your assignment while the rest of us are gone. When we get back, you and I will head to Mitras to speak with investors. At that time, you will not mention capturing a titan; you will only mention the projects you're working on right now. We will not have this discussion again. Understood?"

Hange made no move to take the file. "Erwin-"

"Hey, shitgoggles," said Levi. "He said no. Take the damned file."

Moblit let out a low groan, raking his hands into his hair. "Please, Squad Leader."

Hange glanced at Levi, then Moblit, then back at Erwin, then snatched the file out of his hands. "Sir."

"Thank you." Erwin clasped his hands behind his back, addressing the entire group. "I have to head into town to finalize some financial arrangements. Levi, Mike, make sure your teams are all ready to leave in the morning. And Levi..." He hesitated.

His hesitation said everything. "Yeah, got it," said Levi.

Erwin held his gaze for a moment longer, impassive, then left the room.

Levi leaned back into the couch with a low sigh. Got it. It was Thursday night, one of their two scheduled nights to spend together that week, but they were both in desperate need of sleep and focus. Once the day's preparations were complete, Levi would retire to his own room, take care of his own needs and go to bed. If he were honest with himself, he was so exhausted that the idea of a night of rest was appealing. He doubted his body would let him do anything else, anyway. Just this past Monday, he and Erwin had fallen asleep half-naked, too tired to continue their foreplay.

Maybe there wasn't much room for physical intimacy right now, but they had spent nearly every waking moment together over the past two weeks. With neither of them sleeping more than two or three hours a night, that was a lot of moments.

Besides, their sacrifices had paid off. The fake silo expedition plans were on the way to the Council records room. They had built a strong team of forty of the Survey Corps' most trustworthy soldiers to carry out the real plans, which were locked down and ready to execute. They had assembled the necessary funds to fake a silo gold haul, thanks to Levi's purchase of the apartments in Ehrmich and Karanese. Erwin even had carriage weight limit calculations ready to explain why the coins were loose instead of in official royal lockboxes.

It was all worth it, and soon, they would have their reward. A week or two on the expedition, then a few days apart while Erwin was in the Capital, and then they'd be together in Ehrmich, where they could forget themselves for a little while.

Or find ourselves again. Levi was no longer sure which was accurate.

Hange dropped to a seat next to him and gave a little moan, flopping dramatically against his shoulder.

"What the hell? Get off me." He pushed against dead weight, then winced as a pungent scent hit his nostrils, like frying onions and garlic. It wasn't necessarily unpleasant, just invasive. "Holy shit, you stink. When's the last time you bathed?"

"A few days ago."

"No, a week yesterday," said Moblit, weary.

"Disgusting." Levi shoved again.

"Fine, I'll bathe before I sleep tonight." Hange sat up. "What's wrong with Erwin? You two have a fight?"

"What?"

"He's been so uptight since you two got back from the Capital. More than usual."

Levi glanced at Moblit before he answered. The man had only been let in on their secret relationship a couple months ago, and it still felt strange to discuss it in front of him. "Maybe he's just pissed off that you keep bringing up your own shitty project ideas when he's got enough to worry-"

"Not enough sex," interrupted Mike from the couch.

"Ah," said Hange, as if it explained everything.

"Fuck off, Mike," said Levi with a swell of defensiveness. "You don't say two fucking words this whole time, and now you have something to say?"

Hange stood and leaned into Mike's face, as if inspecting his nose. "Can you smell when they've had sex?"

Moblit looked frantically at the door. "Squad Leader, we should really be cleaning up the lab."

"He can't smell anything over your armpits, stinkgoggles." Levi stood. "I'm going to check on the stables. Mike, go make sure the gear checks are going well. Moblit, make sure your dumbass Squad Leader takes a bath."

He left the room without looking back. The Squad Leaders needed to mind their own fucking business and stop hassling Erwin with stupid shit like capturing titans. The only thing that mattered right now was Wall Maria.

In the stables, Dita's team was assessing equipment and packing the carts. Several carts were empty. Because they hadn't successfully convinced the merchants to give them food supplies in advance, they would have to remove food supplies from the nearest two established checkpoints, carry them all the way through the supply route, and transfer them to the two new ones at the end of it. It was easy to get to the nearest two checkpoints - they had travelled past them dozens of times over the past three years - so they would be the easiest checkpoints to restock once the merchants finally came through. If they ever do.

While their primary goal was to stock two of the remaining four checkpoints, they would be holding at the furthest point for a few days for their secondary goal: scouting. Levi, Mike and a small strike squad would be venturing toward Shiganshina. This mission's furthest checkpoint would bring them within a half hour's ride of the walled city. Ideally, they would find a way to get into Shiganshina and assess the state of the city, but Erwin believed there would be too many roving titans to safely advance that far. They would do their best; any information they could bring back would be invaluable. Erwin had said it himself during the Council meeting: Shiganshina, at this point, was an unknown. Until they had scouting information, finalizing their plan of attack would be gambling on hunches.

Gambling on hunches is Erwin's specialty, anyway.

Levi returned to his room, intending to do a little tidying before dinner, but he recalled Hange and Mike's discussion. The stress and fatigue of the past two weeks had hurt his libido, and it really had been a few days since he had gotten off. It wasn't like they would have much time alone during the mission, either, other than a few awkward, impersonal minutes of mutual masturbation here and there.

He locked his bedroom door, then sat on the end of his bed and unbuckled his uniform. Usually, it took him less than a minute to take care of himself, but his body wouldn't cooperate. He tried flipping his grip, tried his other hand, and even tried coating himself with oil. Still soft.

With a frustrated groan, he fell back to the bed. If he couldn't jerk off, then maybe he could at least get a nap in before dinner.

.*.*.*.

Erwin accepted the flat paper parcel. "Did you get everything I requested?"

The woman shook her head. "Everything's locked up tight. This is the best I could do without arousing suspicion."

"I see. Thank you." He tucked the parcel under his arm. With a quick glance around the park to make sure they weren't watched, he added, "Hasek has been compromised."

Her brows rose. "By whom?"

"Sahlo. I suspect Leona may be working with him as well."

The woman closed her eyes for a few seconds, taking a deep breath. When she opened them again, she gave him a humourless smile and said, "I see. We'll be in touch." She stood and turned, leaving him alone on the bench.

Erwin waited a few more minutes, subtly scanning the park. Finding no one suspicious, he stood.

Once he was inside his apartment, he locked the door and lit the desk lamp. He pulled a wooden grid out of the top drawer: a cipher. He slipped a knife under the paper flap of the parcel and slit it open, pulling out an envelope. The envelope's surface displayed a passphrase in code, an official seal that the messenger had come from his information network. He quickly confirmed the phrase, even though he had seen the same woman several times before. With Sahlo acting in unpredictable ways, he couldn't be too careful.

He opened the envelope and pulled out a file. Receipts, documents, contracts. Several of the receipts would be helpful: they showed purchases for Sahlo's estate, billed to HDB Shipping. A document showed the silo Sahlo had sent them after was, indeed, an actual silo. Maybe Erwin was getting paranoid, but he had genuinely wondered if Sahlo had made up the silo to try to test his loyalty to the Council.

Another document was unexpected: transcription and minutes of a meeting between Sahlo and Lobov during the days when Erwin had been pressuring Lobov. One line leapt out, spoken by Sahlo: "Tolerate him, for now. He will be useful to us."

Useful. How could an up-and-coming Survey Corps Squad Leader be of use to a lord? Surely it wasn't just about collection coins from silos - was it?

Whatever Sahlo had meant, it was becoming clear he had kept his eye on Erwin for a long time. How much of their conflict had been accidental, and how much had been by Sahlo's design? And for what purpose?

Erwin flipped the page, considering, when he stopped. Folded in half, tucked between two sheets of paper, was a small certificate. The paper was yellow with age.

*.*

DUPLICATE

RECORD OF BIRTH

Martin Jacques Sahlo

Born on the 10th of January, 501 in Mitras.

Father: Lord Jacques Alain Sahlo

Mother:

*.*

Erwin flipped over the page, examining the back of it. The stamps and signature on the back looked legitimate; the document was complete.

Who is your mother, Sahlo? He studied the empty space where the mother's name should be. A scandal, perhaps? Maybe Sahlo's father had accidentally impregnated a rival noble's daughter or wife. He grimaced. This felt like a valuable key, but he had no idea where to find the door it opened.

The rest of the documents made feeble links between Sahlo and HDB Shipping, but nothing concrete. Erwin slipped the file carefully into his desk drawer. He'd let it simmer in the back of his mind while they were on the expedition. There were more pressing concerns.

Deep in thought, he wandered back to base. When he arrived, he began a circuit: stables, store rooms, gear check, office. Everything was proceeding exactly as he had requested. A corner of his lips lifted. Maybe he hadn't figured out what to do about Sahlo, but at least he had the mission under perfect control.

He asked a soldier to check his gear, then finished off a stack of paperwork. At this rate, he might even get a full night's sleep. It was nearing dinner time, and he decided to give himself a proper dinner break. If Levi wasn't too busy, they could sneak up to the guard tower and have a few minutes of peace together.

Levi wasn't in his office, and there was no response when Erwin knocked on his bedroom door. He was about to leave, when he paused. Loud, rasping sounds were coming from inside the bedroom. He pulled out his key ring and quietly unlocked the door, stepping into the room.

He smiled.

Levi lay on his back at the end of the bed, a hand tucked down the front of unbuttoned pants. His face was slack, and he was snoring.

Though it was tempting, Erwin had learned in the early months of their relationship that a kiss to the forehead was a terrible way to awaken Levi. On occasion, the man awoke by jumping to his feet, ready to fight. Erwin's teeth were still rattling from the crack of their skulls, three years later. Instead, he knelt beside the bed and stroked the dark hair back from the broad forehead. The man barely stirred.

He's so exhausted. He's going to miss his last hot meal before the expedition. Erwin ran a finger down the petite nose to the gentle snub at the end. "Levi."

"Mm," said Levi.

"It's time for dinner."

"Mm?" The dark eyelashes parted, then narrowed into a squint. "Dinner? I thought I was only out for a minute." He looked down at the hand down his pants. "Oh. Shit."

"Not a bad sight to walk in on."

"Don't bother getting worked up. Couldn't even get it up."

Erwin hesitated. "Yeah, I know that feeling."

Levi withdrew his hand and sat up, buttoning his pants. "I hope we bounce back in Ehrmich."

With all the short-term planning, Erwin had lost sight of what lay beyond the expedition. His chest fluttered. "We will. We're just exhausted."

"Yeah. What are you doing here, anyway? I thought we weren't going to have time together."

"This is business related; I have some information to discuss with you. Thought we might take our dinners to either the guard tower or the park."

"Tower," said Levi. "Then I can sit close to you again."

Erwin smiled. "I'd like that."

They retrieved their dinners and settled on top of the tower. Now Erwin was thinking about Ehrmich and all the trip would entail – one overdue activity in particular.

He'd wait until their second afternoon. They'd both be wearing semi-formal wear in anticipation of a fine dinner later that night. Erwin would suggest a mid-afternoon snack to hold them over. Levi would love a particular tea shop near the centre of town; they had the best selection of tea outside of Mitras, and a large bakery as well. After they had eaten and drunk their fill, they'd take a walk up the hill at the centre of a quiet park near the edge of the city limits. They'd find a private spot to watch the sunset. As the sun went down, both of them bathed in orange light, Erwin would get down on one knee and offer a ring.

A ring.

He idly reached for Levi's hand and held it out, feeling each of the knuckles in turn.

Levi's lip curled. "What are you doing?"

"These hands do so much for me. For humanity. I feel like I haven't shown my appreciation for them lately." He subtly pressed their palms together. Levi had large hands for his height, but they were still small compared to Erwin's. His ring finger is narrower than my little finger. He stored the information away, hoping it would help him find the right ring size when he and Hange went to Mitras after the expedition. "Your hands are so delicate."

"Yeah, well your fingers are like sausages," muttered Levi, retracting his hand.

"I seem to recall you praising their thickness late one night, not too long ago." The memory made his pulse rise. Maybe his libido wasn't as dead as he thought. "I love you, Levi."

A slim brow furrowed. "Where did that come from?"

"Do I need a reason to say it?"

Levi studied him for a moment longer, then leaned in to kiss the underside of his jaw. "Shut up and eat. I bet you forgot to eat lunch, didn't you?"

After a moment's consideration, Erwin said, "I suppose I did."

Levi flicked his forehead.

"Ouch."

"I keep telling you, you have to eat. Coffee's not enough to keep your brain working properly."

He had a point, and the lack of food probably wasn't helping his fatigue levels, either. Erwin took a bite of bread.

Once they had cleaned their plates, Erwin leaned back against the short wall, and Levi snuggled against him, between his legs, positioned just as he had been on the couch earlier. He was warm, and his muscled frame was at once firm and soft. Erwin's eyes closed. When he breathed in, he smelled lemon soap, and above it, chimney smoke.

"It's starting to smell like fall."

After a pause, Levi said, "You think we'll get everything ready and scouted before winter?"

"Of course. We just need the Council to approve one more mission after this, when we'll secure those last two checkpoints, and then we have all winter to plan. You and Mike may need to spend some extra time at the furthest checkpoint, depending how dangerous it is when we arrive. If it's safe enough to do extensive scouting, I'd like you to stay a couple weeks into October, depending how the weather holds out. That should give us enough data to plan throughout the winter." If Sahlo and his friends don't prevent all this. Erwin frowned, nuzzling into the top of Levi's head. "I wanted to speak to you about information I received about Sahlo. Something is puzzling me."

"Yeah?"

"My contact delivered some moderately useful information - receipts, mostly - that included a duplicate of Sahlo's birth certificate. His mother's name was left blank. I thought she might be from a rival noble family, perhaps, or a commoner, but public records showed the family was struggling financially until our lord friend, at a surprisingly young age, lifted the company out of the gutter. Their reputation couldn't have gotten any lower, so it wouldn't have mattered if Sahlo's father married down, or even if they were unwed."

Levi spoke, voice quiet: "Maybe he married further down than you're thinking."

"What do you mean?"

"Maybe Sahlo's mother was a sex worker. Maybe his father fell in love, tried to give her a better life."

There was a strange note in Levi's voice, but Erwin was whisked away on a wave of inspiration before he could pinpoint it. He thought of the girl Hyacinth in the Underground: You're one of those. The surface dwellers of marrying age who think they can save me.

"He fell in love with a sex worker in the Underground," said Erwin, mind racing. "He brought her to the surface. That's why Sahlo is so obsessed with the Underground, why he's the only lord who gives day passes to Rage Klein's sex workers, why he claims to have some master plan in place to aid the people there. Maybe his mother was employed by the Klein family, and he owes a familial debt of gratitude, or he's leveraging past connections." This opened up so many possibilities he had never considered.

Levi pulled away and turned to look at him. "Hey, Erwin." There was that strange note again.

"Yes?"

"Is there a chance Sahlo might actually be helping the Underground with whatever he's doing?"

Erwin's brows rose.

"Look," said Levi, "I think he's a selfish asshole. I don't trust him. But even when there were three solid walls, the Underground was starving. Is that going to be any different this time around?"

"It's difficult to guess," said Erwin, voice tight.

"No, it's not: the surface-dwellers are going to pack even more food on their plates, and the Underground won't see a crumb. What if Sahlo figured out a way to get food to the people who really need it? What if we fuck that up by trying to stop him?"

Erwin watched him for a moment, then looked away. He gently detached himself from Levi and rose to his feet.

Levi's brows pinched. "You're leaving?"

"I promise you one thing, Levi: if we don't collect Wall Maria's harvest before the winter of 850, we will run out of food, and the Underground will be first to starve. I don't know what solution Sahlo thinks he's found, but it's useless if there isn't any food to distribute."

"Don't get pissy. I said I don't trust him."

Their gaze held, then Erwin opened the hatch. "Don't let him get in your head."

"What the hell? He's not in my head."

Erwin began to climb down the ladder, his brows heavy.

.*.*.*.

It took until nightfall for Erwin's mood to relax again, and when the tension finally drained from his body, he felt empty. The bed was cold, and his conscience was heavy. Maybe it hadn't been an outright fight, or even an argument, but he hated to leave their interaction on such a sour note - and all because his ego was bruised. He was better than that.

He didn't bother to knock as he unlocked Levi's door. He heard the bed shift, suddenly, as if the Captain were sitting bolt upright.

"Levi," said Erwin, voice low.

The bedside lamp flickered to life. Levi squinted at him, hair ruffled. "I thought you were pissed off at me."

"Can I come in?"

"You're already in."

Erwin locked the door, then sat on the side of the bed opposite Levi, half-turning to face him. "I was rude," he began as an apology.

"No shit." Levi folded his arms over his chest.

"I've been with the Survey Corps for a good seventeen years now, and every single one of those years, through every single decision, I've always had a clear line of sight on my next goal. The decisions haven't always been easy, and sometimes they've come with great sacrifice, but at least they were always clear. Obstacles did little to deter me. But the older I get, the more I realize things aren't quite as black-and-white as I always believed." He folded his hands in his lap, looking down. "I accused you of letting Sahlo get into your head. I was projecting. He's gotten into mine."

After a moment, Levi slid over. "Get in bed, or you'll freeze."

Erwin gratefully slid under the covers. This bed was already warmer than the one he had left behind.

Levi rolled onto his side to study him. "Keep talking."

"My thoughts on Sahlo have been pragmatic, maybe even inhuman: Wall Maria must come first, at any cost. Even if Sahlo has a plan to save the Underground, that will mean nothing if we don't expand our arable land. Our priorities are clear: we have to push past him and reclaim the wall. We must be prepared to sacrifice our most vulnerable citizens if we are to save humanity." He rolled onto his side, too, facing Levi. "But I think of Leona, and I think of you and your past, and I think of the dancer who proudly makes a living in the worst possible conditions. What kind of monster would be willing to sacrifice people like that - the people who have borne the worst brunt of humanity's struggle? Your question was valid: Sahlo may indeed be the only person with a working plan to save the people of the Underground, and we may indeed disrupt it by pushing back against him." He nestled his cheek into the pillow, smelling lemon soap. "I didn't like your question because I don't like the answer I have to give you."

After a pause, Levi reached out a hand and covered his. Their fingers interlaced. "I'm too close to this."

"Because you lived in the Underground?"

"Yeah. You've asked me before if I have holes in my memory, things blurred out." Levi's brow furrowed. "There are lots of years like that, and what I do remember doesn't always fit together in ways that make sense. I'm not good at remembering things from before. Sometimes I get little flashes - faces, or words, or even just feelings. When we went back Underground last time, I felt a lot of them, things I hadn't felt in a long time. When Sahlo talked me to, I felt even more. And I felt some on the tower today, too. When they happen, I stop thinking properly. I feel like a little kid again, stupid and scared. So I act on instinct."

"I trust your instincts."

"Well, I trust your logic more." Levi slid their joined hands to his mouth and kissed one of Erwin's knuckles. "My instincts from back then are all about one person surviving; it's selfish. You have to think about everyone surviving. I still want to know Sahlo's plan. And if it's just some dumb fucking way for him to exploit people for a profit, I want to kill him. But maybe that's me being scared. So do what you want. I've got your back."

I want to kill him. Erwin closed his eyes; the lamp lit his eyelids red. Red, dripping down Levi's nose, his mouth, his chin. Was the solution really that simple? Were they close enough to Wall Maria that they could kill Sahlo, and no one would have time to fill the power gap he left behind?

"It may come to that yet." His eyes opened. "I'd rather he die by a hangman's noose than by your hand. It's more complicated than simply removing him."

"Then I won't question you again." Levi kissed his knuckle again. "I just needed to know you've considered the Underground."

"I'm sorry. I overreacted." Erwin inched closer, kissing one of Levi's knuckles. "I've neglected you all week, and then I lashed out at you because I was frustrated with Sahlo."

"It's okay."

"It's not okay." He didn't care how busy they got, or how much stress he was under; he must never hurt the man he loved.

Levi leaned closer and kissed the tip of his nose. Their gaze held, then Levi aimed lower, pressing a soft, closed-mouth kiss into his lips. Then there was a second kiss, then a third, and then their lips parted. Erwin let out a soft, fluttering breath, his eyes closing.

Levi shifted closer, fingertips trailing down Erwin's chin, his throat, his chest. The kiss broke, and their gaze held as Levi's fingers traced a line down his abdomen to the front of his pants.

"Should we stop?" whispered Levi.

Erwin barely shook his head, carried away by the feather-light touch. His pants were already tight. It's been too long. He ran his palm down the front of Levi's body and felt him stir. Their mouths met again, then Levi rolled on top of him, their lips still joined.

He's so warm. Erwin ran a hand down his spine, hips gently rocking. Levi kissed across to his ear, then whispered:

"How far do you want to take this?"

"Keep going. I'm clean."

Levi's throat bobbed, and then he bent down for another kiss.

They made love slowly, arching against each other, gaze holding in the dim lamplight. Erwin wrapped his legs around Levi's waist, feeling the man's back muscles rolling beneath his calves with each thrust. His Captain was so beautiful, his chest and shoulders flexing in waves, his eyes narrow with focus. Erwin reached out to cup his cheek and slid a thumb between the thin lips; Levi ran his tongue along it, the closest gesture to a kiss they could share from this angle.

Then an oil-slicked hand tightened around him, moving in the same rhythm as their bodies, and Erwin closed his eyes, tilted his head back, felt Levi's slow waves tug at him inside and out, stronger, stronger...

He heard Levi cry out as he did, felt him ripple through him as they went under together.

His eyelids parted - it felt like seconds later, but the lamp was low. Levi was asleep on his shoulder, a soiled rag in his limp hand. He didn't even finish cleaning us up before he fell asleep.

Erwin swallowed hard and pressed a kiss into the man's forehead, breathing in. I'm so lucky to have you.

He thought of the push to the Wall, and all that needed to be done before then, and all that was likely to come after it. His heart ached.

"I love you," he whispered.

"I love you, too," mumbled Levi in his sleep.

.*.*.*.

Early the next morning, they assembled before the gate: Erwin in front, Levi on his right, Mike on his left. A few townspeople gathered on either side of the road, but not many. The public was more interested in the major expeditions, especially the grisly remains at the end of one.

The gate rose, and Erwin shifted higher in the saddle, breathing in the sweet scent of greenery. His stomach dropped with anticipation as he felt every soldier around him hold their breath, waiting for his command.

"Advance!" he roared.

Immediately outside the gate, a curious titan began to run toward them. Levi dispatched Petra, Gunter and Eld. When another appeared, Levi grimaced and went after it himself, barking orders at his remaining teammates.

Erwin kept his gaze forward, but his heart swelled with pride. Leader of the soldiers.

Once they were free of the settlement by the walls, a clear path lay before them. They had swept through this area so many times that the titan population, at least for now, had dwindled.

They halted in the courtyard of the first checkpoint to fill their carts with the food supplies the merchants had refused to give them. Once the carts were ready, the troops rested and ate lunch while Erwin met with Pehr and Johanna to discuss their pace. They had a lot of ground to cover before they arrived at their destination, and the danger would only increase as they moved deeper. Shiganshina was the source of all titans inside Wall Maria, and Erwin had every reason to believe they had kept pouring through the hole since the fall, like water through a leak.

That evening, they arrived at the second checkpoint without any losses, having successfully evaded every titan they spotted. Once all necessary plans for the next day had been verified and the troops had eaten, Erwin pulled Levi away to the one room with a lock, chewing a mouthful of mint as they walked.

The instant the door closed, he pushed Levi against it, mouth covering his.

When he pulled away, he felt Levi's hand stroke his chest. "Did you bring a lamp?" asked Levi.

"No."

"It's too dark. I want to watch you jerk off."

"Tomorrow night. This will have to do for now." Erwin bent down to kiss him again.

Expedition lovemaking was always so impersonal, frantically grabbing at themselves under cloaks, splattering on crumbling walls. There were so many complicating factors: numbness from the saddle, trying to avoid arousing suspicion, and, at times like this, lack of proper lighting. And yet, Erwin always found his sex drive came to him in a rush when they were outside Wall Rose. Part of it was certainly due to the complete absence of political stress. There was a wild freedom here.

And part of it was seeing Levi in his natural state. Everything about him - his speed, his observational skills, his instincts - was perfectly suited to being in the field. Even his sweat was natural; it reminded Erwin of the scent of sand on a hot day. He bent forward in the darkness to taste the dried sweat on Levi's neck, landing just below his ear.

"Hey," said Levi, pulling away. "I'm filthy."

"You smell so good," whispered Erwin, barely aware his lips were moving. "Fuck!" His breath hitched and he threw the cloak to the side so he didn't soil it. The last few pulses were fading when he heard Levi give a grunt between clenched teeth.

Both satisfied, they readjusted their uniforms, but Erwin was reluctant to leave. He pulled Levi in and wrapped his arms around him.

"Clingy," said Levi.

"A bit." They hadn't focused enough on each other over the past couple weeks; he wanted to make up for it now. Erwin kissed the top of his head, swaying a little from side to side. They would have to make time to dance in Ehrmich. It had been months since they had last danced together - Erwin had danced with several soldiers in turn during the Survey Corps Christmas celebration, so they had sneaked one public dance then, and another, in private, behind a closed door, the music muffled. Had that really been nine months ago? Time is slipping through our fingers so quickly. He curled tighter around Levi. The next several months were bound to slip by, too, in late nights and frantic, scheduled sex.

"You okay?" said Levi.

"Let's make a point of visiting a dance hall when we're in Ehrmich. If we're in plainclothes and the lamps are dim, we can blend in with the crowd."

"Sure." After a pause, Levi added, "I guess we won't be August and Emil this time."

Erwin's jaw tensed as he realized their aliases were no longer usable, not after using them in their fateful trip to the Underground. He would have to go back to Leona for a new set. If I can still trust Leona.

"We'll think of new aliases," he said aloud. "Any requests?"

"I liked the old ones."

Erwin paused. "So did I. I'm sorry, Levi."

"Not your fault."

Generous of him, considering it was. Erwin closed his eyes. "Let's go back to the others."

They shared a final kiss, then returned to the main room and lay down next to Mike. It was too warm to have the excuse to cuddle - none of the other soldiers were - so Erwin rolled to face Levi instead. Levi did the same. Minty breath and body heat filled the air between them, and even though they weren't touching, it felt like an embrace.

Erwin closed his eyes, savouring it. Maybe he was being a bit clingy, but he didn't want a single moment together to slip by. Too many already had.

.*.*.*.

In spite of Erwin's determination to treasure their stolen moments, the days began to bleed together. They travelled an average of two checkpoints a day, aiming to keep the troops and the horses well-rested. Because their numbers were small, they focused on evading titans rather than clearing them out.

Even with their streamlined, maneuverable formation, the titans a bigger problem as they progressed, as did the number of casualties. They had left with forty; by the time they arrived at the most distantly stocked checkpoint, they had thirty-two. One of those lost was the mission's sole field medic.

"We can use each of these deaths against Sahlo," Erwin told Levi, trying to keep his spirits high, but Levi's gaze was as hollow as Erwin's chest. Political games meant nothing out here.

They stayed at the last stocked checkpoint for an extra day, tallying and preparing supplies for the push to the first of the two new checkpoints. Mike and Levi took small scouting teams ahead, surveying two possible routes to their next target. Mike's team narrowly evaded a swarm of titans, but Levi's found a safe path, albeit one heavily laden with bramble.

That night, the three officers - along with team leaders Pehr, Eld and Nanaba - spent several hours discussing their next moves. Erwin unrolled a map at the centre of the table in a makeshift meeting room, marking their two goals with red markers. The first had once been a merchant's warehouse; it wasn't as defensible as a military base, but its fences and silos made it an ideal location to store supplies. The second was an old Garrison outpost, and it was likely to be in rough shape, as it hadn't been used for several decades.

"We need two days at the first checkpoint," said Levi, tapping the map at the centre of the table. "One to repair, clean it and stock it; the other for Mike and me to scout ahead to the next one."

"An afternoon of scouting should be sufficient," said Pehr.

Mike shook his head. "This area is already crawling with titans. It'll get worse as we get closer to the Wall."

Erwin rubbed his chin, studying the red markers. Though they had four checkpoints left to set up - two this expedition, two during the next one - the last three were equidistant from Wall Maria; the Wall was where the military would be making its stand, so the Wall was where the bulk of the supplies needed to be. That meant this mission was going to bring them within an hour of the Wall. The second new checkpoint was bound to be swimming beneath a tide of titans.

"We'll take two days at the first target," he said aloud.

"Our water supplies-" began Pehr.

A whimper sounded from the corner of the room, and they fell silent.

Nanaba leaned against the wall, clutching her stomach.

"Everything okay, Nanaba?" asked Erwin.

"Sorry." She wiped a damp strand of blond hair off her forehead, still hunched. "Monthly cramps. Bad timing."

Erwin's eyes shifted to Mike, whose nostrils were twitching. When his lips flattened, Erwin knew she was lying. "Nanaba, do you need medical attention?"

"No, I'm fine. Just caught me off guard." She nodded at the map. "Please keep going, Pehr."

By the end of the meeting, they had agreed on a timeline and the next day's strategy. Erwin dismissed them and moved to talk to Nanaba, but she ducked out of the room before he could catch her attention.

"Mike," he said instead.

The Squad Leader came over to him. "No idea."

"Keep an eye on her. If she seems to get worse, she needs to see a..." Erwin trailed off, remembering their only medic was dead. "Ah."

"Levi's not bad."

"He's good with first aid, but I'm not sure he can help with a diagnosis if there's a serious problem." In addition to a mastery of stitching wounds that had surely come from the independence one developed in the Underground, Levi had, on many occasions, displayed a surprising knowledge about administering morphine. Or perhaps not so surprising, given his history. Erwin did his best not to think about that - not because it bothered him, but because it bothered Levi.

"Should I isolate her?" asked Mike.

It seemed unlikely she would have developed a contagious stomach bug alone, given they had all been travelling together for more than a week. "Not unless you think it's necessary."

"Okay." Mike nodded, then left the room. Erwin rolled up the map, setting it neatly back in its case, then followed.

Levi was waiting for him in the hallway, arms folded over his chest.

"Captain," said Erwin lightly as they fell into step together.

"Put me on path clearing tomorrow."

"I'd rather have you taking out titans than bushes. We need our strongest soldiers protecting us until we've carved through the rough patch and we're mobile again."

"That bramble is thick as hell. The faster we get through, the less time we're vulnerable. We need my speed to carve the path." Levi led him around a corner. "I'll be on alert for smoke flares if I'm needed to help the patrol teams."

"Very well," said Erwin, convinced. "Johanna's been complaining that she misses being on the front lines, anyway. You can trade places with her." He slowed to a halt. "How are you feeling?" he added, the words heavy with subtext.

Levi reached out to straighten the Commander's pendant. "Tired. Sore. Think I'll head to bed after I check on my horse."

"Understandable. I'm tired, too." Erwin's fatigue hit him as he said the words, his eyelids heavy. The faces of the dead soldiers began to float through his mind, a constant nuisance during missions with heavy losses. Normally, he was able to shove them aside until an appropriate time to mourn, but he found himself too tired to keep them at bay. "What was the name of the boy who died today?"

"The kid with the freckles? Oswald."

"Oswald." Erwin leaned on one shoulder against the wall, losing focus. "He must have been, what, fifteen? Sixteen? I rode past him as he died."

Levi's fingers curled around the pendant. "Don't do this right now."

"He was bleeding out and terrified, but he still used the last of his strength to salute me." A muscle in his jaw began to jump. "He gave his life for me, and died saluting me. I meant everything to him, and he meant nothing to me. I didn't know his name. I don't even recall seeing him before."

"Erwin," growled Levi. "Stop."

The world shifted back into focus, and he saw his Captain watching him with pinched brows.

"Look," said Levi, "just because you can't feel sadness right now doesn't mean you should try to feel guilt."

The problem was that he didn't know what he was feeling - too much and nothing, all at once. At least feeling guilt would give him focus.

He forced a smile. "My apologies, Levi. I should check in on Nanaba."

"You don't have to give me that fake smile."

"Goodnight, Levi." He bent forward to kiss the man's forehead, breathing in. He wished he could curl around him, envelope him, inhale his scent from every surface of his body. His throat tightened, and he finally realized what he was feeling: fragile. He quickly left the room, not making eye contact, because seeing pity or concern in Levi's eyes was certain to make him crumble.

He found Nanaba in the common sleeping area, curled into a ball on her bedroll. He knelt in front of her.

"Are you going to be okay to ride with us tomorrow?" he asked, his voice low.

She nodded. "Just a little sore."

"Please report to Mike immediately if your situation changes." When he stood, his knees creaked. "Get some sleep."

"Yes, Commander."

"That goes for all of you." He turned to the other soldiers, who were playing cards and taking drinks out of flasks he pretended not to see. "Lights out. Tomorrow morning, we will begin exploring new territory - territory humanity hasn't traversed in nearly five long years."

As the soldiers around him murmured and began to douse lamps, Erwin rolled out his bedroll against the far wall, ready to take his own advice. Every joint in his body was aching, and his eyelids were heavy. He tried not to see that soldier saluting, but it replayed over and over in his mind, a waking nightmare. Oswald. I don't even know if he was on Mike or Levi's squad.

He was just drifting to sleep when he heard boot steps. He rolled over, blinking. Levi was setting up a bedroll beside him with one hand, holding a small candle with the other. Their eyes held.

"Bit cold tonight," murmured Levi, smoothing out the bedroll. "You stink less than the rest of these brats."

"It is a bit chilly."

He snuffed the candle, then Erwin heard him stretching out along the bedroll. Reaching into the darkness, he found Levi's shoulder. He pulled him in tightly, hugging him against his body.

"Erwin," breathed Levi, too softly for anyone to hear.

"Please, just for a minute." It was dark. No one would see. He breathed in the scent at the top of his head, smoothing the slender back. He needed to hold someone living, feel his weight, his heft. "Just for a minute."

Levi's hands tightened into claws on his back.

.*.*.*.

Nanaba was so pale the next morning that Erwin ordered her to ride beside him. He was beginning to reconsider the possibility of a stomach flu - she kept disappearing from the group while they were preparing to ride out, then returning several minutes later smelling of alcohol. She's probably using it as mouthwash after she vomits.

As they filtered through the gates, Levi rode up beside him. "We've got about two hours until we get to the bramble. Easy ride until that point."

"Let's hope the titans Mike encountered didn't wander west." Erwin carefully clipped his flare gun to his belt while the other soldiers assembled.

Luck was on their side. The ride was as easy as Levi had said, the road still clearly marked from when it had been a major trade route before the fall. The flat landscape and cloudy day gave them far better visibility than Erwin was accustomed to having, and while they spotted several groups of titans, they had enough advanced warning to easily avoid them.

Around two hours in, just as Levi had said, the greenery around them began to change. Blackberry bushes, unhindered by frequent horses and carts, had reclaimed the landscape in a thick carpet. While the rest of the formation split into groups, Erwin rode as far as the thorns would allow, then dismounted.

"Didn't realize it was blackberry bushes," he said. Most of them were taller than he was.

Levi dismounted beside him. "I'm not good with plants."

"We used to have them in our yard when I was a kid." Erwin felt that strange elastic snap in his mind that sometimes happened when he was remembering his childhood. He saw Helena plucking berries and dropping them into a pail, then saw Papa feeding Mama a blackberry, and he saw a pie, and a red checked tablecloth... Never forget...

He blinked and turned to the cart drivers and Nanaba. "Blackberry bushes are quick to spread," he said. "We need to clear at least a metre on either side of the road if we want this path to last us until the reclamation effort."

The order was met with a few mutters and groans, but the soldiers dismounted and pulled their blades.

"We should just burn it," said a young soldier.

Levi smacked the back of his head. "You feel how dry it is, brat? Hear that grass crunch under your feet? You try to light this, you're going to set this whole field on fire and roast us alive."

Nanaba still looked so queasy that Erwin stationed her on her horse and gave her his signal flares. They needed at least one person up high enough to view the field around them. He fell in beside Levi, hacking at the thorns. True to his word, the Captain was faster than any of them, spinning and cutting his way through the bramble. Erwin allowed himself a glance his way every few minutes, admiring Levi's skill.

Even with the morning chill and cloudy sky, the work was grueling. By the time they were fifteen minutes in, Erwin's shoulders and upper back ached. Sweat trailed down his temples and beaded on his upper lip.

"Commander," said Nanaba after about thirty minutes. He looked back, and she pointed east. "Red flares, closing in."

Erwin turned. "Levi."

"Okay." Levi sheathed his blades and mounted his horse, riding east.

The other soldiers stared at Erwin, eyes round.

"Keep working," he said, doing the same. "The sooner we get through here, the less attention we'll attract."

Levi returned several minutes later, his cape and hair still steaming. "Four," he said as he dismounted. "Three-to-five metre. We got them all. No others approaching."

Erwin nodded, grateful.

It took nearly an hour, but finally, the path was clear. They cautiously moved the carts through, pausing to carve through any lingering branches. Once they had cleared the other side, Erwin nodded at Nanaba.

"Fire a green flare south."

Green smoke shot into the air, and around them, its echoes.

.*.*.*.

They pulled up to the checkpoint mid-afternoon. The fence was badly damaged, so much so that Erwin recruited a group of soldiers to help him with repairs while Mike and Levi did their preliminary scouting.

Levi's eyes were unusually bright when they returned from their afternoon scouting, even though the news was bad: the path to the next checkpoint was crawling with titans. The officers spent several hours discussing plans for the next day's scouting and checkpoint repairs, then Erwin dismissed them for their evening downtime.

Levi waited until the others had left, then moved in close. "We're so close to Shiganshina."

Erwin was hunched over a map on the table; he traced the route over and over with his fingertip, trying to commit the features of the landscape to memory. "We are indeed. I suppose that's why you spotted so many titans on your scouting mission."

"You led us here."

Erwin looked up, brows rising. Levi's eyes were still alight, and this time, Erwin released they were alight for him.

"I didn't get here alone," he said.

"I was right to follow you." Levi stepped closer. "I knew you'd be the one to lead us to freedom."

"Levi?"

The man stood on his toes and looped a hand around Erwin's neck, tugging him down for a kiss. Erwin closed his eyes and relaxed into it, marvelling for the thousandth time that a man so brutal on the field could kiss so gently.

Their lips broke apart, but Levi didn't pull away.

"I love you." His whisper was breezy against Erwin's damp lips.

The door slammed open.

They jumped apart, but it was only Mike in the doorway. "Erwin."

Erwin stood tall. "Everything okay?"

Mike shook his head and stepped into the room. Nanaba leaned heavily against his side, clutching her abdomen. Her face was red and streaked with tears.

Shit. "Bring her here." Erwin rolled up the map and set it aside. "Levi, you're the closest thing we have to a medic."

"Fuck." Levi dug through the cart of supplies in the corner and pulled out a medical kit.

Mike lifted Nanaba and set her on the table, wincing as she cried out.

"Take off her shirt," said Levi, digging through the kit. "We need to see what's going on."

Mike's face turned crimson.

"I'll do it," said Erwin as he gently tugged the woman's arms away from her body. He pulled off her jacket, trying not to jar her too much. "Lay back."

She tried, then yelped, curling forward again.

"Mike," said Erwin quietly.

The Squad Leader's jaw clenched. He held out a massive hand. "Squeeze it. Hard as you need to."

Nanaba looked up at him, sniffling, then wrapped her hand around his, knuckles white.

"Now lay back," said Erwin, and she grunted through clenched teeth, forcing herself back to the table. She was squeezing Mike's hand so tightly that his fingertips were turning purple, but he didn't make a sound.

Erwin lifted her shirt, pulling it up to the bottom of her breasts. A gash split her abdomen, marked by black thread and fringed by red skin so inflamed that it was shiny.

"Shit," said Levi. "What the hell happened?"

"We-" began Nanaba, but a hiccupping sob cut her off.

"Gelgar accidentally caught her with his blade on the second day, during a coordinated takedown," said Mike, barely audible. "She didn't want him to get in trouble, so she stitched it herself. She was using liquor to try to keep it clean."

Levi leaned closer, grimacing. "Not a bad stitch job. But it's infected. Look at those red streaks."

Now Erwin saw them, crawling a few millimetres across her skin, toward her heart. Treating a spreading infection was difficult enough in a hospital, let alone on the field without a proper medic. His heart sank.

"This is why it's imperative to report every injury - even if it seems like it's under control, and even if another soldier might get disciplined for it." His eyes lifted to Mike. "I assume you smelled the infection?"

Mike nodded. "It's faint."

"It's barely spread," said Levi. "Can't tell how deep it goes, but you caught it early. Probably hurts like hell, though." He pulled out a syringe and a vial. "How much do you weigh, blondie?"

"Sixty," gasped Nanaba.

"Start low," said Erwin as Levi began to fill the syringe. "You can always increase later."

"Yeah." Levi injected the medicine into her shoulder. Nanaba's hand began to relax, slowly slipping out of Mike's grasp. He gently lowered her hand to the table, but didn't let go.

"Still with us?" asked Levi.

"Yeah," said Nanaba, lips barely moving.

Levi looked up at Erwin and Mike. "I say we give her a bit more sedative, then rip out the stitches and see what's going on in there. We'll have to cut out the infected parts and cauterize them."

Mike's eyes snapped open. "What?"

"We don't need to cauterize," said Erwin. " A burn wound has a good chance of getting infected, too. We need to clean the wound and get her to a hospital when we return." If she hangs on that long. It would be at least a week until they were back in Trost, likely longer.

"The infection's barely started spreading," said Levi. "We go aggressive, while we have the chance to get it all, or we lose her."

"What's going on?" mumbled Nanaba, eyelids drooping.

Mike's hand tightened around hers.

Erwin closed his eyes, considering. Nanaba had been with the Survey Corps even longer than Levi; she had excellent precision and adaptability. They couldn't afford to lose her. He set his jaw and nodded. "I trust your assessment, Levi. Mike?"

The Squad Leader cursed softly under his breath, but nodded as well. He pulled a chair over and sat, still holding Nanaba's hand. "We're going to cut out the infection," he said softly.

Her head rolled toward him, her eyes ticking oddly, as if she were fighting to focus. "Cut?"

"It's going to hurt. But it might save your life."

She closed her eyes. "More drugs."

"Already on it," said Levi, carefully filling a syringe.

"I'll start heating a blade," said Erwin quietly. "Levi, are you comfortable handling the incisions?"

"No, but I'll do it."

They began their preparations, their faces grim.


(Continued in Part 2, which was posted at the same time as this chapter!)