"She said I could fish," Jack sighed as he sat on the bed, waiting for his wife to finish freshening up for their first appointment with the cardiologist.

"Yes, but that was just an example. I highly doubt she'll authorize your fishing through solid ice," Sam protested as she walked out of the bathroom, dressed in a yellow cable-knit sweater and black slacks with her long hair styled as usual with a light wave near the end. "Especially with the below freezing temperatures of Minnesota."

"Can we at least ask her?" Jack asked as she slipped her shoes on.

"Jack, she might not even authorize the trip to the cabin at all," Sam said, trying to be gentle with the news. "I mean, you just had a heart attack for cryin' out loud! We may have to visit the cabin some other time."

Jack sighed. "Fine."

"But..." Sam said, more sympathetically. "We'll ask her."

Jack brightened a little as Sam fastened her watch to her wrist before smoothing her sweater over the bump created by their unborn baby which was only visible because of the form-fitting cut of the sweater. "Let's go." She said, looking at her husband with a small smile.

"Yes, ma'am," Jack murmured under his breath as he stood.

Sam watched him leave the room with a small sigh before she reached for her charcoal pea coat and walked out to the car.

-

The drive to the Academy hospital was uncomfortably and abnormally silent, and Sam looked over at her husband who sat in the passenger seat beside her. He just watched the world pass by him as he sat staring out the window.

She tried to open her mouth to say something, anything, butshe thought better of it. She'd undoubtedly been pushing him too hard to accept his new lifestyle.

She sighed. She just wanted him to talk to her. She pulled up to the Academy hospital general admittance doors, and put the car into park. "Go on in," she said, softly. "I'll be in once I park the car."

He nodded silently before stepping out of the car and closing the door behind him.

She watched him for a few moments before she put the car back in drive and drove sedately through the parking lot in an effort to find a parking spot. Didn't he realize that the only reason she was so serious about all of his dietary and lifestyle changes was because she didn't want to lose him? Didn't he know how well she knew him? That she knew if he were to spend more than six months feeling helpless and tired he'd rather die?

She finally found an empty spot toward the back of the parking lot. She pulled into the spot, put the car in park and turned off the engine. She inhaled as she thought of her husband and the reality of his brush with death hit her once again. As she felt herself choke up with emotion, she let her head fall to the steering wheel and cried.

-

"Sorry I'm late," Sam murmured meekly as she entered the office where her husband sat. "Couldn't find a parking spot."

"I see." He said, emotionlessly.

She pulled her coat off and held it in her arms as she sat down in the chair beside him. She'd only taken a few moments to gather herself together, and she hoped that her recent tears had evaporated during the walk back up to the hospital's entrance.

"Sorry to keep you waiting," Dr. Vincent said, entering the room before Sam could have much of a chance to be perturbed by the silence. She stepped around to the other side of her desk where she sat down in front of them. "How are you doing?"

"Fine," Sam and Jack muttered in unison.

The cardiologist seemed to distrust their self-assessments though she smiled kindly. "Good. That's good to hear." She looked at Jack. "How has your recovery been so far? Are you resting, eating right, taking time to smell the roses?"

"Yeah." Jack said with a sarcastic edge to his tone. "I've got the Post-Heart-Attack police at my house. I'm perfect."

Sam closed her eyes and inhaled to keep from losing her composure.

"How are you, Mrs. O'Neill? Are you adjusting to the new lifestyle?"

Sam opened her eyes again to see the sympathetic gaze of the cardiologist. "I'm fine." She managed, tersely.

Dr. Vincent let her eyes wander from Sam to Jack before she inhaled and retrieved a small pad of sticky notes. "One of the things I like to have all of my couples do within the first couple of weeks after the initial attack is to see one of the Academy psychologists. I'm going to write down his name and phone number, and I'd like you to make sure you get in touch with him by the time we see each other next."

Sam nodded slowly as Jack rolled his eyes.

"Something wrong, General?"

"No." Jack sighed.

"He doesn't like shrinks," Sam said, looking at him for a moment.

"I see." Dr. Vincent said, nodding. "Well, I don't think it will take too many sessions. Usually my patients end up having one session for themselves, one session for their spouse, and then one joint session where Dr. Hamilton will act as a mediator while the couple usually ends up talking through some of their frustrations from the change in lifestyle."

Sam nodded in understanding.

"Now, did you get a chance to do any exercise?" Dr. Vincent asked, turning back to Jack. "Maybe take a nice relaxing walk in the park with your wife? Did you maybe walk the dog for a few minutes?"

Jack exhaled. "I...walked around the house a little bit, but I was pretty much confined to my room."

Sam winced internally at his choice of words. Like she had kept him prisoner.

"Well, maybe this week," Dr. Vincent said with a kind smile. "In fact, I think I'd like you to have a session or two with one of our physical therapists on staff in the next week. I'll give you the PT/OT number."

"Thank you," Sam said, quietly. She felt more and more isolated from her husband the longer this appointment dragged on.

"Are you having some trouble working within the dietary guidelines I gave you last week?" Dr. Vincent asked, looking at Sam and then at Jack.

Sam shook her head. "No."

Jack threw her a look.

"Well, I mean...Jack likes red meat and egg yolks, so it's an adjustment..."

"You don't have to do it, Sam," Jack sighed, annoyed.

Sam closed her mouth and bit the insides of her cheeks before she looked up at the doctor. "It's an adjustment," she shrugged.

"Well, we have some nutritionists and dieticians here on staff who have some wonderful recipes in case you have any trouble meeting the guidelines and still feeling like you get to enjoy eating your food." Dr. Vincent said, earnestly.

She inhaled. "I know this is an adjustment. Chronic conditions like heart disease often induce the same kind of grief cycle that you would experience if someone had died. I'm not saying it's going to be easy, but you can get through it. Just recognize that for both of you, and probably for any children or close friends and relatives, there will be good and bad days. Days when you're excited about the chance you have of preventing these kinds of attacks in the future and other days when you're depressed that you have to think about it in the first place. You may be feeling guilty about some aspect of heart disease prevention. Thinking that you could have done better. The point is, that this kind of cycle is normal, and you need to allow yourselves and each other to experience the whole cycle. That's when you'll get to the real healing."

Sam felt silent tears slip down her cheeks as she nodded.

"Now, I'd like to set up an appointment for early next week to do some more tests," Dr. Vincent said, turning to Jack. "I just want to make sure your heart is still healing and working properly."

Sam looked over at him as he nodded slowly.

"Excellent. Do you have any questions?"

Sam bit her lip before she inhaled. "Wh-when do you think Jack would be able to travel?"

"Depends mostly on what his tests show when he comes in," Dr. Vincent said, seriously. "Right now, he seems to be all right, but if he's in pain or has some trouble over the next few days, I might have to change my mind."

Sam nodded as she played with her fingers nervously. "We just...we have a cabin in Minnesota. Jack's grandfather built it, and...it's been our tradition, when we've been home together, to go to the cabin for Christmas."

"Sounds like a great tradition," Dr. Vincent said with a smile. "Like I said, I don't see why he couldn't go as long as someone else was worrying about doing the heavy labor, assuming, of course, that there is any involved."

Sam nodded earnestly. "Sure. Sure."

"Someone besides you," Dr. Vincent said in a gentle rebuke as she looked down at Sam's gently curved bump.

Sam nodded more slowly in understanding. "Okay."

"Any other questions?"

"Nope." Jack muttered somewhat flippantly as he stood.

Dr. Vincent followed suit, and offered her hand to Jack. "Well then, I'll give you my card in case something comes up."

"Won't need it." Jack said, looking in cocky disdain at the card.

Sam reached out for it as she stood. "Thank you, Dr. Vincent. You've been very helpful."

"Try to take some time for yourselves. Some time to reconnect outside of the caretaker and patient roles," she said, seriously.

Sam swallowed as she looked at her husband for a moment. "We'll try," she managed, obviously guarded at the prospect of spending any length of time with him in this particular mood.

"It will get better," Dr. Vincent promised. "Just a little readjustment, that's all."

"Thank you," Sam managed as she stepped past the doctor and her husband and into the waiting room.

Jack followed and they walked silently to the front doors together. "I'll get the car."

"Of course you will." He said, sarcastically.

"What does that mean?" She asked, turning to him in infuriation.

"I can get to the damn car, Sam," Jack returned, angrily. "Yes, I just had a heart attack, but I'm not helpless."

"I know." She said with a dangerously calm tone.

"Well, why aren't you showing it? Why aren't you acting like I can still do things for myself?"

"Because I know that if you take it a little easier than you're used to for the short term, you will probably be better off in the long term." She snapped. "And even though you're hell bent on telling the world that I'm the Wicked Witch of the West, I'm just trying to take care of you because I love you. God forbid that I should worry about you having another heart attack."

"Well, it's not exactly a picnic being the person who just had the damn thing!" Jack announced.

"I never said it was," Sam whispered, tears pricking at her eyes. "But every so often, I realize how close I came to losing you last week, and I..."

She paused as her voice became shaky with emotion. "And I want to do everything I can to keep from going through that again."

"Yeah, well what about me?" Jack asked, more quietly. "You had that first nightmare, and I spent half the night wondering if you'd be okay if something were to happen to me." He swallowed and looked down at the floor. "I've made more than my share of enemies here, and someday, they might want to even the score."

Sam closed her eyes at the prospect of losing him to some sort of revenge attack.

"I just...I worry that if something like that were to happen, you wouldn't have what you needed."

"I'd be fine, Jack." She whispered. "Financially, legally...I'd be fine." She blinked away another storm of tears. "But I'd want to die if I wasn't able to wake up with you in the morning or see you play with Doc and Grace." She ran her fingers over her stomach. "And...it would kill me to give birth to this baby if I knew he'd never get to meet his father."

Jack swallowed as he watched her. She looked so scared and so vulnerable. He inhaled before taking a step toward her. "C'mere."

"I'll be all right," she whimpered as she tried to wave his arms away.

"Sh," he whispered as he wrapped his arms around her, gently resting one hand on the back of her head.

"I'm sorry," she whispered. "I know you've felt like I've been too protective..."

"It's okay," he murmured affectionately. "Just...let me do some things for myself and for you once in a while, okay?"

She nodded rapidly.

"Look, how about you, Grace and I have a quiet night at home tonight, hm? Some salmon, a movie, maybe a game...we'll have some fun, okay?"

She pulled away as she wiped the tears from her eyes. "Okay."

"All right," he said with a small smile. "Let's go home."

-

"Knock, knock," Daniel greeted as he opened the door to the O'Neill home.

Sam poked her head around the corner from where she'd been preparing dinner in the kitchen. "Daniel?"

"And me," Vala chimed in.

"And I as well," Teal'c added as he entered the house.

"Hi, guys." She grinned, wiping her hands on her apron before she pulled it off and walked over to hug her friends.

"Look at you!" Daniel grinned as he pulled back and looked at her slowly expanding belly. "You can hardly tell you're pregnant in BDUs..."

Sam chuckled as she modeled the small bump off. "Yes, well..."

Vala shook her head as she hugged her friend. "How have you been feeling? I mean, with the heart attack, you must have..."

"I'm fine," Sam interrupted gently. "Thank you for asking."

"We brought Chinese," Daniel announced, showing her the plastic bag he'd carried into the room.

"Ch-chinese?" Sam asked, surprised.

"We didn't want to impose," Vala added, helpfully.

"Well...we'll, uh...have pot luck," she said, forcing a smile to her lips as Jack, Grace, and Doc arrived at the top of the stairs.

"Danny! Teal'c! Vala!" Jack looked around the kitchen. "Where's Mitchell?"

"Doing her job," Daniel said, pointing his thumb to Sam. "And cursing every minute of it."

Sam chuckled softly.

"Ooh! Chinese!" Jack grinned, looking at the bags which Daniel had in his hand.

Sam bit back a response to his eagerness, trying to keep their discussion from earlier that afternoon in mind.

"Sam's had a bit of a craving for beef and broccoli, though she doesn't want to admit it since Chinese is, at least for the moment, off the list of approved foods that my doctor gave me," Jack said, looking at Daniel. "Anyway, you get some of that?"

"Yeah." Daniel said, nodding.

Sam turned a surprised look to her husband, who grinned. "I'll have some of that risotto with my salmon. It's my favorite."

"So, you can't have Chinese?" Daniel asked, looking at his friend.

"Uh...no." Jack said, shaking his head. "Red meat is a "no", fried food is a "no", and the heavy glazes and sauces are all also "no"."

"And we thought we were going to get something you could have," Vala pouted. "I wanted to bring pizza."

"That, I can have," Jack said, eagerly. "Assuming that I get what my wife has every time we have pizza."

"Veggie pizza?" Grace asked, wrinkling her nose in disgust.

"Yep." Jack laughed.

"Ooh, what's this?" Vala asked, dipping a spoon into one of the pots on the stove.

"That's the risotto Jack mentioned." Sam smiled.

"It's so good!" Vala cried with a mouth full of the food. "Did you make it?"

Sam nodded. "Yes."

"That's it," Vala murmured, eating another bite of the rice dish. "That's the last time I believe Sergeant Siler." She swallowed before taking another bite. "He seems like such a nice man, but..."

"But what?" Sam asked as she offered her guest another plate.

"Thank you," Vala said, taking the plate before serving herself a heaping spoonful of the dish. "You know it would absolutely apall you to know what he said about your cooking."

"Please," Sam said, dryly. "Enlighten me."

"He made up some story about you giving half of the base food poisoning at a base-wide picnic ten years ago."

Sam blushed, and Vala paused in her chewing. "You mean it's true?" She asked, swallowing.

Teal'c nodded, steadfastly. "Indeed."

"I hadn't realized that the eggs in my fridge were a little older than I usually let them go," Sam grimaced. "It was from my, uh...mission days."

"Well, before I remember just how long I was praying to the porcelain gods on this one," Jack interrupted. "I'm going down to play some air hockey...anyone else wanna come with?"

"I could go for that," Daniel admitted.

"Me too!" Vala said, excitedly.

"And me!" Grace added.

Doc offered an enthusiastic woof, causing Sam to chuckle softly. "Sounds like we're going downstairs."

-

"Ha!" Jack yelled, excitedly.

Sam raised an eyebrow as she looked over to where he'd just scored the winning point against Teal'c.

"I know, I know," Jack said, apologetically, calming instantly. "Blood pressure."

Sam managed a small smile, continuing to hold her tongue about his medical condition.

"You know, Jack, you're taking this all a bit better than I thought you would," Daniel admitted.

"Oh?" Jack asked, walking over to the couch so that he could sit beside his wife.

"Yeah." Daniel said, looking up from where he was rubbing Vala's neck and shoulders. "I thought Sam would have driven you crazy by now."

Sam tensed as Jack sat beside her. "Well..." She began, swallowing as she tried to gather up the courage to rehash any of the argument they'd had that morning.

"She's taking very good care of me," Jack murmured as he wrapped his arm around her shoulder and kissed her cheek.

Sam turned a grateful smile to him as she cuddled up to him, resting her cheek on his shoulder and letting her hand fall to her lap as it cradled her burgeoning belly.

"Mom, are we finishing this game?" Grace asked, looking up at her mother.

Sam exhaled. "Sorry, angel," she murmured, pulling away from Jack, as she returned to the chess board.

"Your move, Mom."

"Okay," Sam said, looking at the board. She made a move before sitting back in her husband's arms. "Your move."

"Check mate." Grace said, instantly making her move.

Sam smiled. "Impressive. I haven't been beaten for a few years..."

"Yeah, that's because you don't play anyone except me anymore," Jack murmured, affectionately.

She giggled softly.

"Well, still...you have to admit that historically, you haven't taken vulnerable too well," Daniel finished, returning to his earlier train of thought.

"He still doesn't," Sam admitted. "I'm just learning when to give him some space."

"What was it like?" Vala asked, looking at Jack.

She won a look from all of her compatriots.

"What? I've never been near death before!" She protested. "I mean, there was this one time where a merchant from..."

"Ahem," Daniel interrupted. "I don't think we need a story right now."

"Yeah, Dad, what was it like?" Grace asked after a moment.

Sam studied her husband's face as his jovial nature was stripped away with every thought that went through his mind about his many brushes with death.

"Grace, angel," she murmured, looking back at Grace. "Maybe you should go to bed. Your dad's had a long day, and he's tired."

"She's fine," Jack said, touching his wife's hand as she prepared to stand. "I guess...I keep trying to avoid talking about this, but it's not doing me any favors as you saw this afternoon."

Sam tensed. "Well, I think we were both a little emotional about the whole experience..."

"Yes, I think we were." Jack admitted before he inhaled. "When I had the heart attack...I went to...a place..." He exhaled slowly. "Uh, I can't remember a lot about everything, but I do remember thinking that when I woke up out of the anesthesia, I'd seen Charlie."

"Who's Charlie?" Vala asked before Daniel could quiet her.

"Jack's son." Sam whispered, taking her husband's hand into her own. "He died before Jack went on the first mission with Daniel."

"Oh," Vala whispered, more sympathetically.

"I remembered thinking that I'd finally made it. I'd finally gotten to where I wanted to go. I could go with Charlie, and I could rest."

Sam tried to swallow the tears which had begun welling up in her eyes.

"And then, I thought about Grace and Sam."

He looked over at Sam, who was trying to appear strong for her husband.

"And I thought about the baby."

Sam looked down at her stomach, gently rubbing it with one hand.

"And I realized that, as much as I loved and will always love Charlie, I've had so much to live for that I couldn't just throw it away." He gently wiped Sam's tears from her face as he looked into her watery eyes. "So, I guess that's when I started fighting to come back."

The party fell into a deep silence as Sam wrapped her arms around her husband. "I'm glad you came back," she whispered, tearfully.

"I'm glad I came back too," he admitted softly.

"Do you think Charlie would have liked me?" Grace asked after a moment.

"He would have loved having a little sister. Especially one like you," Jack said, managing a chuckle as he reached out for his daughter's hand.

"Well, this has been a nice evening," Daniel admitted as Jack and Sam hugged their daughter. "We'll clean up and show ourselves out."

"Thanks for coming," Sam said, looking over at him.

"Sure thing," Daniel said with a smile as he, Vala and Teal'c stood. "Take care of yourselves, and we'll see you at the base when you come back."

Sam nodded as she returned her attention to her family, only marginally surprised to find that none of the O'Neills had a dry eye between the three of them.

"I'm getting soft in my old age," Jack laughed as he sat back several minutes later.

"I like it," Sam said, curling up beside him as a sign of her emotional and physical weariness.

Grace smiled silently as she laid her head on her mother's lap.

"I think they've got the Simpsons on tonight," Jack said, looking down the row. "Any objections?"

Sam rolled her eyes as Grace shook her head.

"Okay then, by majority rules, we're watching the Simpsons." He said, reaching for the television remote and turning the television on.

It was only a few minutes before he heard two sets of snoring from his wife and daughter. He smiled as he turned the program off. He lay his head back on the pillow and closed his eyes. These were the Kodak moments he'd been wanting so desperately not to miss.