Prentiss
"Derek, not here! Not now." I tried to calm him down. We had been arguing and yelling for a while now. We were in my room and the whole team, Will and the two boys included, were downstairs.
"Why not?"
"Because the whole team is downstairs and so are Jack and Henry!"
"Why do you always need to use all of them as an excuse for not talking to me!?"
"Why is this so important to you!?"
"Are you serious? Emily, this is important to me because I don't want something to happen to you."
"Nothing is happening to me." I rolled my eyes.
"No? Doctor Willis calling Rossi, Hotch and me didn't say something? I'm not even an emergency contact and she still called me."
"She took what I said wrong." We had calmed down a bit now.
"She thinks you're suicidal again."
"She's wrong."
"Emily."
"Derek."
"Emily!"
"What!? What do you want me to tell you, Derek!? I'm telling you that I am not going to kill myself but hey, if you want to think otherwise, then fine! You can go do that at your place because you're driving me insane!"
He shook his head and stormed out of the room. I ran after him as he walked downstairs quickly and grabbed his coat on the way through the living room. "Derek."
"Oh my god." He turned around, "What do you want from me!?"
"I want you to trust me!"
"Back at you!" He said aggressively and loudly in front of the team before turning and walking to the foyer. I heard the door open within a few seconds and his car start within a few more.
I took in an unsteady breathe and looked at the team, "Sorry." I said quietly.
"Are you okay?" JJ asked.
"I just got yelled at for answering that question."
"Do you want to get drunk?" Garcia asked, holding a glass of vodka to me.
I walked over and took it, "Always." I sat down beside Rossi and drank back the glass in one try. I made a disgusted face as it burned down my throat and I put the glass down. Garcia filled it back up and I thanked her quietly.
"So should we be worried and keeping an extra eye on you?" Rossi asked me.
I groaned and dropped my head, "Please, not again. I think I'm losing my voice."
"I'm not going to argue with you that loudly."
"Oh, just at a normal volume?" I asked him sarcastically.
"Honestly, are you okay?"
"I was before that." I motioned to the roof above us to refer to the argument.
I sighed and silence fell over the room. I drank the next glass of vodka before deciding that I felt too uncomfortable with all their eyes on me, observing and profiling, so I said goodnight and went to bed, "Come tomorrow. I need to tell you something." I texted Derek.
"Is it the truth?"
"It's everything. Goodnight xx."
"Call me if you can't sleep."
Even when fighting, he was the sweetest guy I had ever had something this good with. I smiled to myself and plugged my phone into the charger. I pet Sergio a few times before getting changed, getting into bed and turning the lamp off. I stared at the darkness that was the roof for around four hours before I was finally able to fall asleep.
The team had stayed over last night after drinking too much to drive home and I woke up early, had a shower and sat in the living room by myself for an hour before Rossi came downstairs. "Wow. Why are you up already? It's only 7 on a Saturday."
I looked at him, "Derek's coming sometime today."
"So you got up at 6 to wait for him? I heard you up and walking around."
I gave him a guilty smile.
"Do you want to talk?"
I hesitated, "I want coffee…"
He smiled and motioned for me to follow him. I got up and sat at the counter island as he made coffee for the both of us and stood across from me, "Shoot."
"I miss him and I shouldn't. I've gone days, a week without seeing him. This is one night that I take away from him regularly but I miss him."
"Because you're fighting and you're mad and you know he's mad and you're on different pages."
I nodded, "And I lied."
"To who?"
"Everyone." I took the cup of coffee as he slid it towards me, "Thanks."
"What did you lie about?"
"You know." I gave him an obvious look, "Please don't make me spell it out for you."
He nodded, "Why didn't you just tell us the truth or tell us before we found out from Willis?"
"Because I was scared. I still am. I'm scared of myself and I'm scared of you and Hotch and Derek and the others. It's not all the time, it's just when I'm alone."
"When you're without Morgan or when you're alone all together?"
"All together. When Derek goes home and everyone else is at their home and I know you're asleep or busy doing something. That kind of alone."
"You can always wake me up or tell me to stop doing whatever I'm doing."
"You would be living your life doing absolutely nothing with no sleep."
"Maybe you should—" He stopped when we heard the doorbell. He smiled and nodded when I looked back at him, "Go."
I smiled and kissed his cheek before running to the foyer. I unlocked the door and threw myself into Derek once it opened. He put his arms around me but he didn't kiss my hair like he always did. I eventually stepped back and I pulled the front door closed, leaving us outside of it. I didn't want to be overheard right now.
"I lied to you." I said quietly, "I'm so sorry that I did but I was scared, Derek. But you help. Trust me, you really do. When you're around, I don't even think about it. It's just when I'm alone, by myself with no one around except Sergio. It's not as serious as last time."
"How is it not as serious?" He asked. His voice was tired and quiet.
"Because even if I want to, I won't leave you."
He sighed and looked away, "Emily—"
"I love you." I cut him off. He moved his eyes back to me with shock written across his face, "So damn much." I added.
A small smile plastered across his lips. He bowed his head slightly and kissed me hard. This was the first time I had told him that, at least intentionally and seriously. I kiss him back with the same amount of force and smiled once we eventually parted.
"I love you too, princess." He said as he put his arms around me. I held mine tightly around him and closed my eyes, my face buried in his neck.
The day was long; the team hadn't stayed all day. They went to their homes and lived like they normally did on weekends when they weren't with the rest of us. Rossi had given Derek and I some space through the day and it was greatly appreciated.
I walked into Rossi's office and asked if he minded if I stayed at Derek's tonight. His reply was: "As long as you intend on returning in one piece".
So we watched a movie before I packed a few things in a bag and left with him. Our hands were linked on the centre console the whole way back to his place and as soon as we got inside, he made his way to the kitchen and starting cooking us dinner. I sat on the counter out of his way and tasted the spaghetti sauce as he stirred the noodles.
"Ah." I exclaimed after tasting it.
"Hot?" He smirked.
"Extremely. Ow." I sipped the wine to cool my mouth. He put the wooden spoon down and walked over to me slowly. He stood in front of me at the counter and put his hands on my thighs on either side of him. I smiled as I looked at him, "Yes?"
He kissed my lips passionately and I returned it with just as much passion. He kissed me a few more times before I pulled back slightly, "The sauce is burning."
"How hungry are you?"
I rolled my eyes, "Do you want me to finish cooking?"
"No." He shook his head and kissed me one more time before returning to his catering.
It didn't take long to finish cooking and we ate with wine and candles. "This was sweet. Thanks for cooking."
"Well I wasn't going to let you do it." He smirked.
"Hey, I can make spaghetti."
"It's terrible though."
I smiled and looked down, "Yes, everything I do is terrible."
"No, just your cooking."
I rolled my eyes and stood up, picking up my plate and his. I took them to the kitchen and he followed with the wine glasses. He refilled them and made me leave the sink. I sat back on the counter as he cleaned. "You know I could have done that."
"Yes but you are technically my guest."
"So when you do the cleaning up at Rossi's…"
"Then I'm the guest, but, I don't mind doing it."
"But neither do I."
"But I mind if you do it."
"Why?"
"…Uh…you might…clean the plate wrong?"
"Better luck next time." I laughed.
"Shut up." He laughed too and looked to the plate he had been cleaning for several minutes.
"So what are our plans for the rest of the night?"
He looked at me, "I was thinking what we always did when you were here."
"Oh…really?" I made myself sound disappointed.
"…Or not. We could watch another movie or go out or—"
"Derek, I was joking."
He shook his head, "Cruel."
"Sexually frustrated?" I smirked.
"Ha ha." He rolled his eyes.
