29. Sunday

Disclaimer: the characters and all recognisable situations belong to Stephenie Meyer - this is a work of fan fiction, except for the legends and histories of the Quileute that, of course, belong to them. I pay my respects to their gods.

[AN: re Bella's dream… a long time ago someone gave me and a friend a psych test … it was a walk through the forest… and you saw various things on the path… a key, a book, a body of water. The water was your attitude to relationships… I saw the ocean, my friend saw a puddle… later you came across a puddle … it was your attitude to sex… my friend, who earlier had seen a puddle for a relationship, stepped over it… I jumped in it and made everyone wet… funny huh, given what I write now? So Bella waded into the metaphorical sex puddle and enjoyed it… and besides I needed a SM dream sequence… right?]


"So what's the plan for today?" she asked him. She was holding him against her chest and playing with his hair; stroking her fingers through it.

"No plan," he mumbled into her breasts.

"Really? Nowhere you wanted to take me? Nothing you wanted to show me?"

"Nope."

"Have you got patrol?"

"Nope."

"You need to wash your face," she told him.

"Yep."

"Boy, you're just full of one word answers today."

He lifted his head grinned at her and said, "Yep."

She laughed.

"I'll have first shower, you can be next and then by the time you get out, I'll have coffee made. And she says I don't have a plan."

"Hmmm, sounds like a good plan to me."

"Excellent."

He clambered off her and headed for the bathroom. She watched him go. She loved watching him walk naked. She rubbed at the drying blood on her chest. Weird. She used to faint at the smell of it. She glanced up at the doorway Paul had disappeared through. He had changed her in more ways than she had initially planned for. The original contract was for him to teach her how to fuck; that was all.

There were a lot more things now; some bonuses she didn't expect. He seemed to care about her; his wolf loved her. What had he said? She was 'firmly in the mate box.' Was she really? What did that mean to him? And it was obvious to others too. Angela had told her not to lose this one. Charlie thought she was happy.

She got up and didn't bother getting dressed. She went to the toilet; watching him in the shower.

"Can I flush?" she asked.

"No. Leave it for a minute. Water pressure."

Silence. It was warm in the bathroom.

She sat down on the toilet. Her chin rested on her hand.

"Whassup Izzy?"

"What do you mean?" she bristled.

"You're thinking… again."

"Yeah. I suppose I am."

"All right. I'll ask." He sighed. "What are you thinking about Izzy?"

"Us."

"Us?"

"Yeah."

"Uh-huh. And?" He shampooed his hair.

"You said your wolf loved me."

"Yes. Although I am wondering why the fuck I told you that."

"But…"

"It's okay," he interrupted. "I don't really mean that." He rinsed his hair off under the stream of water.

"So we're dating?"

"And fucking."

"Yeah. That's kind of outside the contract… the dating thing."

"And? We tore that thing up ages ago." He turned the water off and stepped out of the shower. He studied her as he stood there and dripped onto the bathmat.

She flushed the toilet, but remained sitting on it. She chewed at her fingernails. For once, she wasn't openly ogling him. He noticed.

He stepped over and knelt at her feet. He grabbed her hand and kissed her palm. "What do you need to hear?" he asked.

She shook her head. "I… I don't know." She looked into his face. "It won't mean anything if I force you into saying it," she noted.

"No," he agreed. He shivered as her wrist brushed against him. He turned it over and studied the bite. "Why is it still cold and shiny?" he asked.

"Edward said he sucked out all the venom, but this is as healed as it has ever got." She poked at a bruise his fingers had left on her thigh. He pushed her hand away.

"Don't do that. It'll get worse," he reprimanded.

He sighed. "I'm no vampire, Izzy. I don't have eternity."

"I know." She sounded so whiny to herself.

"And there's this weird wolf shit… imprinting."

"What's that?"

"Sam and Jared found their partners; their wolf mates through this process." He didn't sound happy about it. "Nobody knows how common it will be. The last pack was our great grandfathers in the 1920's. The last time the Cullens came here. But so far, only two pack members are imprinted. There is much debate about what it is really for. Old Quil thinks it is a breeding program, to make the next generation of wolves bigger. Billy Black thinks it is to complete the wolf; to give them balance. Jake is fucking huge as a wolf and he's not even the alpha yet. When he steps up; he'll grow more. How much bigger do they need to get? He's already 6ft7."

She touched his face. He sounded so unhappy about this imprinting.

"You don't like it," she stated.

"No. Neither does Leah or Seth. I'm not sure about some of the others." He sighed heavily again.

"Tell me," she encouraged.

"It's just weird… you know? It's not like normal love. We can see inside Jared and Sam's heads. They're the only ones who have imprinted so far. Jared sat next to Kim for fucking years and never even saw her. She never showed up on his radar in any way; not even to copy her school work. But he wolfs out and whammo. She's his life partner? I don't buy it. She's so meek and boring and dull." He shrugged. "Maybe she is his perfect partner, but I can't see how. And it's not like he needs calming down or anything. And she's the last person to make him more aggressive or outspoken."

"And Sam?" she asked.

"You know Leah?"

"Leah? Seth's sister. I met her once in January. She seemed kind of angry." She chuckled. "I remember thinking she was too beautiful to be so angry."

"Did you know Sam and Leah were seriously dating?"

"Oh my god, no."

"Yep. Dumped her in a day for Emily."

"No wonder she is so angry; she's still angry with him."

"It gets worse."

"How… shit! She can see inside his head!"

"Smart girl. Yes, she can. You think that is easy for her? Plus Emily was her cousin and her friend."

He looked unbelievably serious for a second. He kissed the scar on her wrist. His lips felt so hot against that artificially chilled skin.

"You're not my imprint," he whispered. It sounded as if it was torn out of him.

Her head lifted. Jesus he could find her… anytime… "Did Sam love Leah?" she asked.

"Yes. I think he still does. It's just… buried… under that pretty imprint weight."

She thought it through. "So regardless of how you feel about me… it could all… go… on some random girl?" She was proud of herself for not letting her voice crack when she said that.

"Yeah," he admitted. He sounded heartbroken. "So I can't promise you anything, Izzy. We might just have today."

"I understand," she said. And she did. He wasn't going to tell her he loved her, when he could break her heart tomorrow. Even if he did love her. And none of it would be his fault. His head dropped and he laid his face on her knees. His wet hair dripped on her and she didn't care. She brushed her fingers down the back of his neck and she thought it through. She couldn't see how his admitting the wolf loved her, fitted in this. Maybe he would never imprint; maybe he'd run into some woman tomorrow? She bent over him and let her hand run down his back.

She could see the small mark on his neck where she had bitten him. She rubbed it lightly with her fingers. "I may not be your imprint… but I'm something," she suggested.

"Yeah… maybe. I don't know. Nobody knows anything about this shit, Izzy. We are kind of learning as we go along." He lifted his head and kissed the bruise on her thigh. "Nobody knows if the imprints can be broken either. Sam and Jared never tried."

"I bet that made Leah angrier."

"Yeah… he didn't love her enough to fight for her. That's what she thinks."

"Can we invite her over today?"

"You gonna fix Leah?" he chuckled.

"No… I'd just like to get to know her better."

He studied her. Then he smiled. "She'll be over anyway… we have her favourite beanbag. Seth will probably earn a punch in the nose for leaving them behind."

Bella made a little pleased noise. "Good." She paused. "Oh. Not that she'll punch Seth, but that she'll be over. That's what I meant."

"I knew what you meant."

"You always do… don't you?" She wasn't talking about Leah now. She grabbed his face and kissed him. She tried to tell him in that kiss what she wasn't sure she could say out loud.

That she loved him.

FF_2154210_ - 25/07/2011 04:48:00 AM