A very extra special love and hugs this week to my team. Nic, Sri, and Iris. I just love you guys.

My Facebook account is gone, but the Bled Dry group remains active. I'm also still on Twitter - 4ubleddry

The frantic pace of these updates is coming to a close. This wraps up the second section of the story, This. The third and final part will resume in a few weeks.

Love each other, people.


I'm so unfinished

Our love affair

A voice in me

Is telling me to

Run away

I hope your feeling isn't diminished

I hope you need someone in your life

Someone like me

'Cause I'm so busy, so busy

Thinking about kissing you

Now I want to do that

Without entertaining another thought

"A Little Lost" Arthur Russel

August 15, 2007

An unfamiliar number appears on my phone right at 6:00.

I'm on a bench out front.

I finish putting on my makeup, grab my purse, and practically run out the door.

He stands up as soon as he sees me. He looks — gah! — just so good. But different, too. He's tanned, and his legs, or what I can see of them through the shorts, are even more defined. I stop in front of him, unsure of what to do.

He seems to have the same dilemma.

We spend a moment looking at each other before he breaks the silence.

"So you broke up with Jeremy."

"How did— Your mom." It's not a question. Why didn't I think about the potential for her to know and pass on the information?

"Yep. So, I just want to be clear about something. You're single now, and I'm single." He moves his hands between us. "I consider this a date. I'd like this to be a date, not just two friends hanging out."

I'm speechless, and it sucks, because for the first time, I think we might be getting somewhere. I so want to respond, but my mouth's gone dry, and I feel like my tongue may fall out if I try to say anything.

But I decide to take a risk.

"Yes." I nod and then cringe, because it doesn't really make sense. But Edward laughs and takes my hand.

We make it about two steps when I realize something. "Edward, how did you get here?"

"I drove. I'm parked under your office tower."

"That's where I'm parked. It closes at 11:00. How about we drive in separate cars and meet there?"

He eyes me suspiciously, and I realize he might think I'm trying to get out of the date.

"It's still a date. I promise. I just really don't want to get a ticket if I leave it there overnight."

"Okay."

We say nothing more as we walk down the staircase to the car access. We stop at the first level where my car is.

"I'll meet you there." I take a step back toward the door that leads out of the pee-scented stairwell, but I don't want to leave.

Edward's still holding my hand; it seems he feels the same way.

Before I can lose my nerve, I step closer to him. I can see I've surprised him, and I lean in and quickly kiss him on the cheek as I let go of his hand.

I'm an excited, nervous wreck by the time I get to my car. I actually drop my keys because my hands are shaking so hard.

I'm going on a date with Edward Cullen.

Oh, my God. Why am I not with him right now? I totally could've swallowed a ticket to be with him. I'm such a fucking idiot. I pull out my phone and dial Rose's number, hitting "Send" as soon as I have a signal.

She doesn't answer until the third ring. "What's wrong? Shouldn't you be with Edward?"

"Oh, my God! Rose, it's a date. He clearly told me we're on a date!"

Rose laughs. "Of course it's a date, you sweet, stupid girl. What did you think it was going to be?"

"He knew about Jeremy."

"Get off the phone and get back to Edward. I'll try and wait up for you, and we can talk about all of this then."


Edward pulls up in a newish SUV. It's a lot of car for a single guy, but I guess it comes in handy with the amount of adventuring he does. He pulls up beside me as I'm getting out of my car.

"Hey."

His killer smile is back, and any nerves he may have had about our date seem to be gone.

"Hey," I reply. It feels a little like high school.

We stand and grin at each other until he grabs my hand again. "Let's go. We're running out of time before the movie starts."

I'm sure it was a great movie, but I have no idea. I could only focus on what it felt like to be holding Edward's hand and the fact this is an above-the-board, actual date. Every now and then, his thumb would brush over my hand and his hand would give me a little squeeze. Every time I looked over at him, he was already smiling at me.

At some point in the movie, I put my head on his shoulder. It feels familiar — not because I've done this long ago, but because it feels like this is where my head should be. It's as much terrifying as it is amazing.

Our hands are still together when we depart the theater. He uses our joined hands to point at a movie poster. "Want to see that next?"

I look at him to see if he's serious, to see if he doesn't remember how much I hate torture movies. He's trying not to laugh.

"Nope. Thanks, though. This was fun and all, but I don't think it'll extend to a second movie." I give his hand a squeeze and try to conceal my own smile.

"You're such a pussy, Swan."

I falter a little, and he knows he has me.

That word coming out of his mouth… I guess he got even for "cock" this summer.

The parking lot cleared out quickly, but our conversation continues. We haven't talked about anything important yet — about Brie, Jeremy, or how this is going to play out when we live so far away. I think we're both enjoying this moment of joy we're finally allowed to have together. I send a quick text to Rose to say I'll be late. I'm still leaning against his SUV, and he's still leaning against my car. He's teasing me, calling me a pussy again, so I kick his foot. It's all a game, really. He can keep saying it. I'd like to hear him say it in other contexts.

"Hey! What was that for?"

"Why so obsessed with my pussy?" Oh, shit. Where's my filter? As much as I'd like him to talk about things he'd like to do to my pussy, I really shouldn't have said that.

His eyes widen, and he coughs a bit. This is behind-the-screen talk. This isn't how we talk in person. It's not even a good comeback.

"Whoa, Swan! Filter."

"You started it"

"Oh, really?" He laughs and stands straight, coming off the car. "This is how it's going down? Some old school, juvenile— Got your phone!" he yells, snatching it from my hand and holding it high above me. Now I'm laughing and trying to pull his arm down. He keeps twisting away from me, causing me to turn with him. I smack into his car, and he quickly reaches over me and puts the phone down on the roof. Then he grabs my arms and holds them pressed to my sides. His head is back, and while he's still laughing, I'm not.

His head finally lowers, and he looks at me. The laughter dies on his lips. He keeps looking at his hands on my arms, his legs on either side of mine, at the length of his body pressed into mine.

"Jesus…" he breaths out, moving off of me. He brushes his hands down my arms, squeezing my hands as he steps further away. "I'm sorry."

I watch his fingers trail under the palms of my hands.

"It's okay." I look away from my hands and at him. I have no idea what he's sorry for. He looks like he's studying me. I've never seen him have any expression that isn't light and full of humor. Even the time he maybe-almost kissed me on the stairs, he was grinning. Now he's looking at me with an intensity that betrays him.

Suddenly, his hands are on my face, and he's inches from me. His eyes are open as he whispers, "I'm not sorry." But he doesn't move. He's frozen, holding my face and staring.

And then it's me. It's fucking me. I don't know if I'm calling his bluff or being brave, but I lean in. As I grab each side of his open sweater, I pull him to me and lean up. I kiss him gently, because I'm still aware this is probably nothing or an experiment he's going to pull away from. We've spent all this time in a chicken match, and any moment now, he's going to pull back, admit I've called him out. He'll say I confused feelings of friendship for something else. Suddenly, I question everything about tonight.

Really, it was nothing, just a brush of the lips. As I predicted, he pulls away. He's back to staring at me, hands on my face. I can feel his rough thumbs moving against my cheeks. I'm expecting him to laugh, to congratulate me on pushing him. But his eyes… His eyes are dark and burn a trail from my eyes to my lips. As his chest continues to press against mine, each rise and fall comes quickly, as though we've been at it for much more than the second it was.

And now it's him. It's fucking him. He's pressed me against the car, and his mouth is on me, and I'm eager. I should be embarrassed, but I can't focus on anything other than his lips moving against mine.

The frantic pace we started at slows, and then Edward pulls away. Any doubt I'd had before he kissed me has evaporated. This thing I feel for him, and have for a long time, he feels it to. I suddenly feel as sure of that as I have about anything before in my life. The realization gives me confidence and spurs me on. He pulls away from, me but I follow him, kissing his jawline to his neck.

"Come back to my place." His voice, rough and desperate, whispers in my ear.

That stops me.

"Your parents' place?" Are they not home? Is this real life?

"No. My place." His smile's killing me; it's fucking radiant.

"I have to work tomorrow. Besides, I can't wait ten hours." I pull him back to me. I may scoff at his parents' place, but I'm not above the back seat. His SUV looks pretty roomy.

"No, Bella. My place. It's just a few blocks from here." He stops to take in my reaction. I'm dumbstruck. "I moved to London. I moved here for you."

"Dude…" I have so many emotions moving through me right now. "If we're going to be together, we're going to need to learn how to communicate."