AN: I currently have a masssssive headache but this just had to be written. I want to thank Tara in advance for wanting to Beta my story, please note she is not beta'ing the chapters before they go online because I didn't want to cause any delay in my updating patern, so any mistakes made in the new chapters are still very much mine.
I Have Cullenism: Well you can ask my other reviewers, I try to update daily to keep you guys all happy (and because it's addictive to write). I am very happy to add you to my army of followers though :D! I HAVE AN ARMY! ;).
D.: Aw I didn't mean to make you cry! (okay I'm lying, I so did). *gives you a hug*.
9shadowcat9: He is wishing that himself as well! Thank you for the compliment about the emotional part though . Let us just keep Tony's hands whole because he needs them to comfort our favorite god.
BlackMeister13: I'm glad you like it I always try to update fast.
Nivala: Well I succeeded then, if you feel bad fo Loki . Of course he has Tony, the man isn't going anywhere.
Tooba K: Aww. I love you too!
MysticWolf4976: Well I think Loki has vented most of his anger already on the garden ;). I get what you are saying about Natasha, but I think that the relationship with the rest of the team could be fixed because there never really was any trust between them in the first place. Thor will take a lot of work though, if it ever was possible.
Anastacianott: So very violent ;). I get what you mean though. Maybe I will let him do exactly that.
OneTooManyHeadAches: I try to update as fast as I can , I'm glad you like it though .
Master of Evil Monkeyness: I get that you can't review all the chapters, so I don't blame you. I'm already glad if I get one of your awesome reviews every week instead of almost every day.
Trekkergurl: After all those reviews I cannot leave you out of this list of course. I'm soooo happy you decided to beta my story and I hope you will have fun with creating the fanart for it . SO I hope you like this chapter.
ladykale1985: Well one can wish, but if the Avengers two goes like this I think it will get very unsuitable for little kids and I am sooo suing them for stealing my ideas :P. Very glad you like it though and I hope you will like the next chapters just as much.
Nemesis Moon: I'm sorry to have left you with such a sad image, but I hope the chapter makes up for it…though I'm glad I could stimulate your imagination like that (wait…that just sounds wrong…).
Joeperrysbabe: Your reviews will always be soooo awesome to read! I would like to say that I'm sorry for making you cry…but I would be lying because that was the goal with that scene.
Twinbats: You so had me picturing that image of Steve getting hit in the stomach, the one they always use on tumblr…I really should stop visiting that site.
Aruyn: Really you deserved the dedication! I'm really glad that I have your help on this.
HimenoSakura90: Goal reached then! Really I'm happy you liked the scene and the portrayal because I always find them very difficult to write when it's this emotional.
TheWritingMonster: Is everything alright now? I would hate to be the reason for you to feel bad…well not really because with a chapter like this you are supposed to feel bad, but still.
cara-tanaka: Yeah, but honestly how do you tell your brother that you cannot handle what happened to him, while said brother was the one to actually go through all of it?
MustacheBuddiesXD: Thank you, I'm glad to have your reassurance on that .
Yami-Fan101: Thank you and I try to keep as many emotional parts in it without over doing it. I hope you like the next chapter.
Phoenix: I know about that and I have tried to correct most of it, but I now have found someone who is going to beta the story. So it should get fixed, though I think I've avoided it mostly in the past few chapters..stil thank you for telling me because I can always use good criticism. I hope you will not start shaking and such after the story is finished, because I would hate to see you committed over a story.
legend of katie: Thank you, and it will be a while before he really will join the group, but they at least accept him now.
Littleblackneko: Aww thank you. It's the thing I enjoy the most about fanfiction. You can really explore all of the characters and their views on things. Give them a little more perspective.
This Chapter is dedicated to Nivala who has made a beautiful piece of fanart for this story and is just totally awesome really. Here is the link to the piece of art: scream - stay-night .devia ntar t art/The-stories- untold-Fanart-Colour-3 14076636
Thank you once again Nivala!
Fenrir knew he had been blessed with a rather calm life, for he had no need to fear things on his island. The only really frightening thing he ever had encountered was the moment he realized they had left him truly alone. Even the episode with Seth had been nothing in comparison to what he was seeing now.
He had known his father had been in some sort of distress when he finally came down from the roof with Tony. His eyes had been puffy and red and he seemed to lean heavily on the smaller man for support. When he had tried to ask what was wrong, Tony had waved his hand mouthing that he would explain it the next day. The memory however had plagued Fenrir the rest of the day, so he had been on high alert when he heard the scream from down the hallway. He really wished he would have listened to Jarvis when he was warned not to enter the bedroom.
The image of his father writhing on the bed, lost in his own head, would haunt him forever. His first thought was that Tony was attacking him as the man was holding Loki by the shoulders, pressing him down against the bed. He dismissed the idea immediately however when he spotted the big vacant eyes. His father was having a nightmare, reliving some kind of terrible memory. The muscles in the body were coiled tightly and his mouth was opening and closing as a fish on dry land. Occasionally there came a high keening sound from the man's throat. It looked horrifying.
"Get away." Tony yelled at him, pulling him out of his terrified trance. It was only then that he realized that his father's fingers had green strands of magic wrapped around them. If he lashed out it would end up very bad. "Get out of here." The smaller man yelled once more as he tried in vain to keep the pale god from hurting himself. His legs felt like lead as he stumbled out of the room where he promptly slid down the wall. Prancer immediately took his place in his lap. It was a small comfort after what he had just seen. He looked up as Tony came out of the room, he was covered in sweat and seemed exhausted.
"Is he always like this?" Fenrir asked as the man slid down the wall next to him.
"No, he isn't. There was just a lot of mess today that sparked a fall back. He is alright now, or at least he is unconscious. He strained himself too much and eventually his brain just shut down." He felt sorry for Tony, if this was a fall back he must have dealt with it before. To see this happen over and over again and knowing he could do nothing about it must be excruciating.
"What happened to him?" He could not envision any memories so terrible that they would cause such a reaction.
"How much did he tell you? I'm not sure exactly how much he would want you to know…"
"Not much really. He told me the basic story of what happened before he was taken to prison and that he had served his time." He knew his father had left out the details, but he had made it very clear that he had been the bad guy in the story. There had been no molly coddling on that part.
"When your father was in his prison, there were some terrible people who did even worse things to him. You don't really need the details and I am pretty sure you don't even want them, but let's just keep it on the fact that while the physical part has been healed, your dad has some mental problems he needs to fix. Today was one of the worse days and I hope it will not be repeated, but just promise me you will not go into the room again when you hear him scream. You saw the magic and how vulnerable he was, Loki does not want you to see him like that…" Well, if anything he didn't want to see his father like that either. This would cause him enough nightmares as it was.
"I promise." The man next to him looked nothing like the energetic kid that had been running around Christmas stores yesterday. He just seemed old and weary and Fenrir couldn't help but wonder how often people saw this side of him. The mature and older side.
"Sir, Mr. Laufeyson has awoken." Fenrir didn't say anything as Tony entered the bedroom. He just got up and went back to his own bed, hoping he could find something to read that would keep his mind of what he had just seen. Tony would take care of his father.
"You look like shit." Were the first words he spoke to the just awakened god, who favored him with a glare.
"I feel like it too." Loki murmured as he tried to sit up. "What on earth happened?" The voice sounded like someone had pushed a piece of sandpaper down his throat. Tony really wasn't surprised with the amount of screaming and whimpering the god had done. He still felt shaken up by those terrible sounds.
"You had a nightmare and then proceeded to black out." He entered the bathroom and retrieved a pain killer and some water. The god must be having a head ache. Tony had awoken from feinting a couple of times before and it always left you with a throbbing in your brain. Not to mention the fact that his head had taken quite a trashing with the headboard. "Here, it's a painkiller. It will help." He felt a little better when the god downed the glass of water and seemed to relax a little. He himself still felt tense between the shoulder blades. Worried that the moment he would calm down Loki would start shaking and screaming again.
"I regret you had to see that." Loki muttered and for a moment tony wondered if he should tell him about Fenrir. He would figure it out anyway.
"I think you should talk to Fenrir tomorrow, he came to see what was happening as you made quite a lot of noise…" He felt bad for making the god feel even worse about the situation, but keeping information from someone with so much trust issues didn't seem like a great idea either.
"Damn, I wished to keep that from him. What did you tell him?" For someone so impossibly tall, he seemed very small now in the bed, curled up in the middle of a large heap of pillows.
"I only told him that some people had done terrible things to you in the prison and that you were still recovering. I gave him no details and made him promise to never go into the room again." Maybe he should offer a little more comfort to the man on the bed. Right now he felt like an idiot, standing next to the bed doing absolutely nothing but talk about things that made the god feel even worse.
"I suppose I do need to talk to him as I can only imagine how this must have seemed to him." Tony sat down next to the man and placed a hand on his shoulder.
"You weren't in control Loki. You could have done nothing to prevent this and he will understand that. He's a smart kid." His words didn't seem to have much effect on Loki but the touching seemed to help. It made Tony wonder how often Loki had been held as a child. He seemed to crave affection in the physical way more than anything. With a dad like Odin, he figured it probably wasn't often Loki could have felt the innocent touch of a hug or a pat on the back. He could only imagine a small dark haired kid, wishing for affection he never got. It really came as no surprise to him that he could easily replace that green eyed boy with a brown eyed one that looked exactly like him. They had both been standing in the shadow of someone they could never become. For Loki it had been Thor, the favored son, and for Tony it had been science and a long believed dead super hero.
The sheets felt clammy beneath him and the room smelt musky of sweat and heat. "Jarvis, please air the room for a bit." He called out as he got up. "You should change in something a little less sweat soaked. I'll just change the sheets in the meantime." It was a testimony of the shape Loki was in when he didn't even protest but just got up and grabbed the stuff he needed. He saw the legs tremble and wanted to reach out when the god tumbled a little, but he knew Loki would not appreciate it. He was already being dependent on Tony and would probably not feel comfortable with accepting help with things he could fix himself.
Once he had changed the sheets and changed his own smelly clothes as well he crawled underneath the sheets. God he was tired. It had been an emotional day and he had gotten hardly any sleep before Loki had started his thrashing. When he looked at the god who crawled in next to him, he realized the man looked just as bad as he felt. It felt strange seeing the man hesitate on where to put his body. The last few weeks had been spend with him curled up against Tony and now he all of a sudden seemed unsure on whether he was still wanted there. Well the genius still wanted him there. He held out his arm and Loki gracefully moved to lay down beside him. The billionaire could feel all the muscles beneath that pale skin still tremble with over exertion. The same way he always got when he had a major adrenaline rush. Time for the big guns then.
He placed one hand in the curly dark locks, while he let the other hand trail soft patterns over the man his back and his side. He felt a few drops hit his neck and he realized that Loki was crying. "Hey, it's alright…." Those words really seemed to be his mantra for the day.
"I know that Stark." The god snapped. Clearly he was feeling frustrated and Tony was pretty sure it wasn't with him.
"You know, I never cried once when my parents were buried. Everyone thought I was just trying to stay strong at the funeral and I got so many compliments for that. To be honest I don't think it had really hit me then that the two people I had called parents for so many years were just gone. It wasn't like I particularly liked them, but they were my parents you know…" He was trying to get the god to stop focusing on his own black and bleak memories and realize he was no longer in that terrible place. He wasn't sure why he had picked his parent's funeral as a story, but it seemed fitting somehow.
"Why are you telling me this?" Loki mumbled.
"Hush, I'm not finished yet. I didn't cry for six months after that and then one day out of nowhere I started and I just couldn't stop. Really embarrassing to, because it was right in front of a girl I had just slept with. I don't think she ever called me back. Anyway, in the end I felt a certain relief you know. I had put it behind me, done the logical thing and I could just move on." Really, what was his point with telling the story again?
"Are you saying I should cry my eyes out in the hope that I can let everything go after that?" Loki seemed rather skeptical of the idea, and to be honest so was Tony.
"No, I'm just saying it's logical you know. I will not think less of you for crying, because you might be a god, but you are also very much a person…." God he should have become a philosopher.
"Stark…"
"Hmm…?"
"You are a terrible psychiatrist." Or maybe not…
AN: Well I hope you guys liked it and thank you once again for all the awesome reviews, likes and favorites. I truly love you guys.
