Note: Thank you, Pleonastica, for editing and beta reading my chapters and all of that. I really appreciate it!

Warning: Bullying, violence, language (I'll add more along the way)

Disclaimer: Pshh, you think I'm Rick Riordan? Please. Also, "Yancy" for the school name is from the first book The Lightning Thief. The actual school name is "Yancy Academy."


Depression

Author: Loving Healer

Chapter Twenty-Eight


"Wh-What?" I stuttered, still not understanding what Nico was telling me.

Nico gritted his teeth tightly together. "Don't make me say it again."

"You're joking... Right?" I asked breathlessly.

Nico didn't answer. He was slightly shaking, but it would've been unnoticeable if I didn't concentrate hard enough. Nico's hand were clenched together so tightly his knuckles were white. His hands slipped back into his pockets, and that was when I went into autopilot.

I practically sprinted toward him only to tug his hands out of his pockets to pull him against me and into a kiss.

Nico didn't kiss back—he was probably too surprised to do anything. But it was okay. I finally found out why I felt so weird around Nico. I finally found out why every touch with him felt like fire. All I needed was to be close to Nico. I was satisfied with just that.

"What are you doing?" Nico asked as best as he could with his lips shoved against mine.

I pulled away and offered him a smile before pulling him back toward me for a hug.

"Just comforting you, is all," I answered.

"I don't need any comforting," Nico snapped against my shoulder. "I've handled it alone for years; I can do it again for the rest of my life."

"Maybe you could." My grip around him tightened. "But I owe you a favor for helping me before when we were at Half-Blood Hill."

"You don't needto," Nico stubbornly refused, but I was a lot more stubborn then he was. "I'm fine by myself, Perce. Let me go."

My heart began to pound even more from the fact that Nico just called me by my nickname. Why that made my heart pound I didn't know, but maybe it was because of the way Nico said my name made me feel full of joy.

This time, I chose to not ignore the constant thumping of my heart. "You know I'm not letting you go," I replied.

Nico sighed exasperatedly. "I had a feeling you would say that."

A long silence settled upon us, but it wasn't uncomfortable as it was before. I liked the silence as long as I was able to hold Nico in my arms for an eternity.

"This is wrong," Nico suddenly broke the silence. "This is allwrong."

"What's wrong?"

"This.What we're doing right now. What you just did before after you took my hands out of my pockets. It's all wrong,Perce."

"Why?" My heart seemed to break when Nico was talking about the kiss.

"Percy," Nico began, "think about this. I'm a guy—"

"Why the fuck would I careabout that?" I growled. "I told you Nico, I—"

"You don't," Nico put bluntly. "Think about it more. Maybe you don't care about the fact that I'm a guy. But do you know how to get someone to love you in the easiest way possible?"

"What is it?" I asked hesitantly.

"Take their heart while they're broken," he answered. "They'll love you because you fixed them. You don't love mePercy, you love the fact that I fixed you."

"No I don't!" I rejected so strongly that my throat hurt.

Nico pushed me harshly away. "Percy. Look at me." I hesitantly glanced at him. His expression was absolutely furious; so furious that it made me cringe.

"You don't understand! You thinkyou love me, but you don't!" Nico practically yelled at me. He stopped, taking slow, deep breaths to calm himself. When he was done, he looked straight into my eyes. "Let's just stop this 'relationship,' okay? Trust me, your feelings will be gone within a few days or weeks. Once the breakup with Annabeth calms down a bit, your 'feelings' for me will be gone."

My heart ached at the thought of never being able to hold Nico like I did just now. "I don't want to," I whispered. I was afraid my voice would crack if I spoke too loudly.

"Maybe you don't now." Nico sighed. "But in the future when we're together, you're gonna regret it."

"What if I don't and we break up now and it was all for nothing?!" I screamed back at him.

"Wait a few weeks. If you still love me, then try again," Nico answered calmly. "For now, let's not do this."

I gulped. I didn't want to stop. Why couldn't he just understand that I loved him? It wasn't because I was weak and desperate to look for someone to love. No, it definitely wasn't that. I loved him even before the breakup. Why did Nico have to do this to me?

"Do you still love me?" I asked. My heart ached even more at the thought of Nico's answer, but I asked him anyway. My curiosity overruled my throbbing heart.

Nico stayed silent for awhile, and it made me even more nervous. I couldn't stand this uncomfortable silence anymore. I wanted the silence I had with him just a few minutes ago. Why couldn't that just come back? Why did this even have to happen?

"I do," Nico finally answered. "I... Loved you since fourth grade."

"Fourth..." I couldn't comprehend this either. Nico loved me for that fucking long?!

"You don't have to say it." Nico sighed once more. "I know it's been a really long time. I actually tried to get rid of my feelings for you when I was in middle school. I thought I succeeded, until I saw you again. It all just went downhill from there."

"Fourth grade..." I repeated in a mere mutter, hanging my head low. "I can't even believe it..."

"You kind of have to because it's the truth," Nico stated, leaning against the door frame of his room.

I looked back up to him. "Can I..." My shoulders immediately tensed up from nervousness. "Can I have just one more kiss from you?" My hand grasped my T-shirt against my chest. "I love this feeling I have for you. I don't want it to go away. So, in case it does go away, I just want to share one more kiss with you. Please?"

Nico looked uncertain, but he wrapped his arms around my neck and pushed his lips onto mine. I smiled, and I was surprised myself when a tear rolled down my cheek as I wrapped my arms around his waist.

I never, ever, everwanted this feeling to go away. I was going to prove to Nico that I loved him if it was the last thing that I do.

I love you, Nico. I really, really do. Don't let me go like this.