All characters belong to JKR

Chapter 29 - This Boy


This boy, took my love away,

Oh he'll regret it someday,

But this boy wants you back again

That boy, isn't good for you,

Though he may want you too,

This boy wants you back again,

Oh and this boy, would be happy,

Just to love you,

And oh, my, that boy, won't be happy,

Till, he sees you cry…

J. Lennon & P. McCartney


Hermione Granger didn't want to die. She was tired of pretending that she had accepted her fate, because she hadn't. She didn't want to die, she wanted to live, she wanted to love, she wanted to fight, but she was so very tired of it all.

Tears sprang to her eyes so quickly it jolted them both. She placed her head on Draco's chest, grabbed the front of his shirt, and said, "I don't want to die, Draco. I don't want to die."

"You don't have to die," Draco whispered into her hair, her body on top of his, his hand brushing up and down her back as she lay on top of him. "I know Adrian told you that he thinks he's found the cure. I know it'll work. You already love Theo. I love Theo." He left the rest hanging in the air, as he kissed the side of her face, her temple, her forehead.

Hoisting herself up to look down at him, a teardrop rolled off her cheek and splashed onto Draco's face, near his left eye. She gave him a sad smile and said, "If that counter-curse works, which we don't know if it will, it doesn't work like you think it does. Believe me; I've already tried that with Harry and Ron."

He couldn't contain the look of disgust that graced his features, rolling over so they were staring at each other on their sides. Brushing her hair away from her face he said, "No, of course that wouldn't have worked. You only think of them as friends. But answer me this, are you falling in love with Theo, yes or no?"

"Oh, Draco," she answered instead, closing her eyes.

"Granger, open your eyes and look at me."

She did, but she didn't answer. She didn't have to, because the answer was there in her eyes.

"I love him, too. It'll work," he assured.

Smiling, she placed a hand on his cheek and said, "Are you that desperate to sleep with me?"

Grinning in return he answered, "Yes, I think I am, but that's beside the point."

"Malfoy," she moaned, closing her eyes again so that she could carefully compose the next thing she wanted to say in her head. Opening her eyes, she said, "You aren't in love with Theo. You love him like a brother, a best friend. And you aren't in love with me."

Suddenly, the Draco from her past, her childhood, surfaced, with the same surly look upon his face. Grabbing her hands in both of his he said tersely, "Kindly don't tell me what I do and do not feel, Granger. It's unbecoming to both of us."

"So you're bisexual now?" she asked seriously.

"What does that have to do with anything?" he demanded, pushing her hands away from him, sitting up in the middle of the bed.

Instead of answering, she rolled over to her side and said, "See. It would never work. Thank you for thinking of me, though. I'm sure I'll find another way." Willing herself to breath in and out, so she could stop all forms of tears, she felt him settle in behind her, then she felt a cover being pulled over them both.

"Don't fret on it now," he said softly in her ear. "Just go to sleep."

"But the others…?"

"The others will never know we've spent the night in a soft bed. We'll go back down to the graveyard at first light. Close your eyes." He pulled her up against him, wrapped his arm around her, and closed his eyes, even if he knew he wasn't about to go to sleep. His body was rock hard, tense with wanting, worrying, anticipation, and fear.

How dare she tell him what he felt and what he didn't feel? His hand drifted down her arm, to her hand. Holding her hand in his, he looked at it in the dim light of his large childhood bedroom. He did love her in his own way. She was one of the few major constants in his life. He didn't have many of those. There were his parents, his friends, and unbelievably, her and her stupid sidekicks.

And he didn't hate any of them any longer, especially her. Was he in love with her? No. He would never – COULD NEVER – love anyone, (except perhaps himself) but that didn't mean he wouldn't be good to her.

But she had a point. He wasn't in love with Theo, though he suspected that one person in their group was. One person in their group had been for a very long time. With that thought, Draco drifted off to sleep.

.

Theo and Blaise stopped playing the game around three in the morning. They had found all their names, silently, without even speaking to the other. One would find a name and write it on the list then the other would find a name and write it on the list. When they were done, they went back to their small fireside campground to find that it was abandoned.

Neither said a word as they lay down on their bedrolls and pretended to go to sleep. Neither asked the other where they supposed Granger and the other Vipers had gone. Neither made a big to-do about the fact that one of them was crying before and the other comforted him. It had happened before and would probably happen again.

"Hey, Blaise," Theo finally said.

"Hmm?"

"Are you asleep?"

"Yes."

A chuckle. "Really? You're asleep?"

"Yes, I really am. I always answer asinine questions in my sleep."

"Okay. Just wanted to be certain."

Quiet.

More quiet.

"Did you want something, Theo?"

"Yeah. Thank you, for before." Pause. "Actually, thank you for many times. You've been a good friend throughout my life."

"And you've to me." Turning to his side, Blaise peered over at Theo. Theo was already staring at Blaise. "You know, what I said back there was true."

"You say so much, so you'll have to clarify," Theo joked.

Blaise sat up. "Wait a second. Let's record this moment for posterity. Did 'Serious Theo' actually just make a joke? Be still my beating heart."

They both laughed.

"Go on," Theo urged.

Blaise took a deep breath. "I was serious when I said that I loved you."

"I know. I was, too."

Blaise was glad for the veil of darkness. He shook his head, because he didn't think his friend DID understand. Crawling closer, he sat right beside him. "Please, try to understand, Theo. I want you finally to understand me. I've never wanted to hurt you, or cause you pain, but I think the time's right for you to hear the truth. I love you, more than as a friend."

Theo didn't flinch.

Finally, he took Blaise's hand in his. His touch was comforting, but Blaise couldn't tell if it was more. Theo said, "I do know that, Blaise. I just don't know if I…well…if I…what I can do with that right now." He dropped his friend's hand to the ground.

"Do you love Hermione?" Blaise asked.

"Fuck," Theo whispered in the dark, pulling his knees up to his chin.

"A yes or no would be a better response," Blaise chuckled.

"You just asked me if I loved you, and then you want to know if I love someone else, that's all. It's almost too much for me to bear right now," Theo repeated, pulling on the grass around his legs.

"That's because you hate to deal with anything emotional. You hate anything that's not neat and tidy and wrapped up with a bow or isn't on a coaster," Blaise said with a slight smirk. "But this is important. Here, let me admit my feelings first."

Theo groaned, kicked out his legs, and stood up. Pacing back and forth by Blaise, he said, "Did you or did you not just do that?"

"I meant, let me tell you what I feel for the little cub." Blaise stood up slowly. He suddenly felt like an old man. When he looked up, he could clearly see Theo looking at him with a round, expectant gaze. "Yes, I love her. I've fallen in love with her, rather. Does that shock you?"

"Fuck," Theo said again.

Blaise raised an eyebrow and said, "Usually you have a better vocabulary than you've portrayed here tonight." With an exaggerated sigh, he sat back down and added, "I know I've given you a lot to think on, but we don't have much time. She's going to die if we don't find a cure, yet the cure is right in front of us. It's so easy, it's shameful."

Rubbing his face with his hands, Theo said, "Adrian's little cure, you mean? We don't even know it'll work."

A small laugh. "How did you know about it…wait, I know, apparently Adrian told you, right?"

"Adrian tells me everything," Theo said, "unlike some of you."

"Touché," Blaise replied, "However, if I had told you that I loved you before tonight, I know you wouldn't have been receptive to it." Theo turned away from Blaise, but Blaise turned him back with one hand on his shoulder, "And don't go thinking I only did it now because of Granger. Yes, I would do anything to save her life, but my love for you has gone on longer than we've known about her illness, so give me some credit, alright."

Holding up his hands, (in defense of what, he didn't know) Theo said, "Fine. Fine. Just, seriously, it's a lot for a man to consider. And yes, I love her. I do. And yes, I love you, I do. And yes, I've known for a long time that's you've loved me as more than a friend, but you're right, I've not been able to accept it. Not that I couldn't accept you – I will always accept you. I just can't…I'm not…" he groaned again… "I'm not. Hell, Blaise, why would anyone love me?"

Theo plopped back down and then lay down, arms tightly around his middle, his back toward his friend. Blaise lay down behind him, placing one hand on his shoulder, and he said, "Why would anyone NOT love you, Theo? That's a better question to ask."

.

Marcus hit the toe of Adrian's shoe with the toe of his boot to wake his friend up. Adrian jerked awake. "Where am I?"

"Graveyard," Marcus grinned.

"Oh, shite." Adrian rubbed his eyes. "I can't believe I fell asleep."

"Yep, right here in the old section. I didn't have the heart to wake you at first, so I thought I'd let you sleep for a while. Then, I started thinking that it was time for us to go back," Marcus explained.

"That's dangerous, you know," Adrian supplied.

"Going back?"

"No, you thinking too hard," he joked.

Marcus laughed at his friend's taunt, even as he stood and offered him his hand. Helping Adrian to stand, Marcus said, "True, true. I'm more of the muscle of the group, not the brains."

Adrian gave him a lopsided grin and said, "No, you're the heart of the group. Hey, listen, seriously, thanks for always being the one to help me come back to earth when my head gets too much in the clouds."

"Because you're on one of your 'I'm a deity' trips?" Marcus asked, biting back a laugh.

Adrian glared at him, but didn't respond. They started walking back to their campsite, aware they could Apparate, but knowing they needed the time to walk, and possibly talk.

Adrian asked, "Do you really think I manipulate everyone for my own gain?"

"Sometimes." Marcus concluded, "And sometimes you do it for their own good, so it's alright in the end."

"I didn't send Granger or those other two members of our team to Peru to die. I swear it on my own life. I didn't believe the claims of the curse at first. I didn't." He stopped walking and pulled on the back of Marcus' shirt. "You believe me, right?"

"Of course," Marcus answered, a wane smile at his disposal. "But that's part of the problem. You didn't believe it to be so, so it couldn't be so, but I'm not going to beat you up over it anymore. We have to be pragmatic now. We have to solve this problem. We have to heal Theo and save Granger's life in the process."

Adrian stared at Marcus and finally said, "Pragmatic? Have you been taking a course on how to use big words while I wasn't looking?"

Marcus drew back his hand and hit Adrian on the arm as hard as he could. "There. That's your answer."

Rubbing his arm, Adrian said, "Egad, Flint. How pragmatic of you."

"Do you want me to punch your other arm?" Flint asked seriously.

"Please no. I take it back about you being the heart of our group, too. You are still and always will be the muscle. I forgot how strong you are." Still rubbing his arm, they walked along the dark woods and Adrian asked, "Remember when we were teenagers, and Theo was beaten by his father because of the crush he had on Granger?"

"How could I forget that? His father, never quite in the inner Death Eater circle that my father or Draco's father was in, didn't want the news to get out, so when he heard about it, he beat the poor boy so bad that he ended up in St. Mungo's. His mum claimed he fell off a broom, but we all knew different."

"Yeah," Adrian said softly. "A few days later, if I recall, his father met with a misfortunate accident, didn't he?"

"Did he?" Marcus asked back. "I don't recall."

They continued walking. Adrian said, "I do. My father told me about it at the time, and I never commented on it to any of you. My father, who as you know, was never a true Death Eater like yours, had heard that his father was beaten for some serious transgression against the Dark Lord. But what my father found odd, as did I, was that the Dark Lord would have either used the Crucio on him or killed him. He wouldn't have wasted time beating him, like a common Muggle."

With his head turned away from Adrian, Marcus said, "You don't say."

"You were just a boy, not too much older than Theo, my age, but you were always taller than the rest of us, bigger, stronger," Adrian initiated.

Marcus walked on.

"Anyway, I was glad he got his comeuppance, that's all. I wonder if Theo ever knew the why's and how's of it."

"He knew," Marcus responded. "He thanked me, in his own way." Marcus stopped walking and stopped by a tree. "Astoria's the one who told his father about his infatuation with the little Gryffindor, you know that, don't you? Daphne told me at the time. I felt it was the least I could do. My father even knew about it. Hell, he was proud of me, sick bastard that he was. He always hated Nott Senior."

They started walking again, when suddenly, Marcus stopped and said, "You know, my father and Draco's father might have been the worst Death Eaters, or in theory, the best Death Eaters around, but they loved their sons. Your father was a pureblood elitist who thought the Dark Lord was the true saviour of our world, but he would never have laid a hand on his flesh and blood. Blaise doesn't know who his father was, and he's had some terrible stepfathers, some decent ones, and a couple of great ones, but his mother would have done anything to protect her son, even kill someone who hurt him. But Theo only had us. I realized that when I was just a kid. It was a scary and a daunting thought, but I took my role of protector of him seriously from the time I realized that to this day."

Adrian nodded, because he was too ensconced in emotions to speak. So instead, he merely nodded in the darkness of the night, reached out a hand, placed it on the other man's arm, and gave it a squeeze. Marcus was not only the heart and the muscle of the group, but the soul, and Adrian wasn't sure he had ever loved him more.

They started walking again, quietly, but together.

.

Draco woke up and he was cold and shivering. He realized instantly that he was in his childhood bed. The lavish green canopy a familiar sight to his sleepy eyes. His arm was over something – someone. Granger. Granger was beside him.

But she wasn't sleeping. She too was awake. He wondered what time it was. Very early, if the strange eerie grey tinge to the room was any indication. He pulled Hermione closer to him, and that was when he noticed that she was crying. She was crying when they fell asleep and she was crying when they awoke.

Well, wasn't that just perfect. He told her he loved her, wanted to make love to her, wanted to save her life, and she cried, and cried and cried. He would probably cry TOO if he knew it was up to HIM to save someone's life.

He placed his cheek on hers, kissed a tear from the corner of her eye, and though she stiffened slightly, he didn't pause. He didn't ask her what was wrong, he didn't give her a chance to retreat. Instead, he pulled her back against his chest and kissed her cheek again.

When she turned her head slightly to look at him, brown eyes awash with tears, a bolt of electricity went through her body to his. He wanted her so badly. He desired this woman. Fine. He didn't love her. But he wanted her and he wanted to make it so she didn't hurt any longer. Didn't cry any longer. And he would help her find a cure to the curse. He would make sure Theo loved her, and that somehow it all turned out fine for everyone.

He usually failed at everything he did (unless he was doing something for himself) but this time he made a silent vow and he would keep it or his name wasn't Draco Malfoy, and hell, his name certainly was Draco Malfoy.

Stroking her arms, back, face, tenderly, expectantly, wanting, waiting, he kissed her again and again, the back of her neck, her hair, her eyes.

Lacing his hands through her curls, he pulled on her hair enough to make her turn her head so he could capture her mouth in an open kiss. He kissed her so thoroughly, deeply thrusting his tongue into her mouth that he thought he could taste her sorrow, or her sadness, and it made him want to weep with her.

How odd.

He placed a hand on her stomach, then up under her blouse, to a plump, ripe breast. Holding it in his hand, he continued to kiss her mouth as his erection pushed into her tight, round arse. He didn't think he could wait. He also didn't think she would want him to. This wasn't about making love. It was about comfort – sexual comfort – in the here and now.

Plucking her nipple with his forefinger and thumb, he adjusted his other hand under her body, opened her slacks, and pushed his hands inside her clothing, until her breathing caught, and she tore her mouth away from his, clutched his wrist with one hand, the pillow with the other.

Yes, he'd found the right spot.

He thumbed her, then moved his fingers inside. She backed against him, sighing, her breath quickening. He quickly moved one hand to his trousers, released himself, pushed her slacks and knickers down, and then placed his large hand over the V of her thighs.

Placing his fingers back inside her, she started to moan. He licked the outer shell of her ear, bit down on the lobe, kissed her neck, and when he felt the back of her bum hit the most sensitive part of him, he knew that she wanted this as much as he did, even if she might protest later.

But he would remind her that this wasn't about making love. This had nothing to do with Theo. This was only about him and her and what they meant to each other, and nothing more.

Placing a hand on her hip to keep her in place, he lifted her top leg slightly, placing it over his legs, and then he slipped inside her. She was warm. She welcomed him in the best possible way. They moved and played and stayed like that until she turned her head slightly.

"Draco?" she said, as if in pain.

"Don't think, Granger."

She moaned again. "I love Theo."

"I told you, so do I, but don't think," he groaned. He devoured her lips after that, so she couldn't even justify talking again. Finally, delving in a few more times, she tore her face from his and screamed. She actually screamed.

And yes. Draco Malfoy screamed, too.

They were relaxed in each other's arms; he reached down for the covers and pulled it back over them right before he pulled out of her. Then he straightened their clothing the best he could, looked down at her and saw that her eyes were already closed. "Sleep a bit more, Granger. We'll figure it all out in the morning."