Dad and I take a quick walk during Angela's amniocentesis. We both wanted to be here to support her, but on the other hand we're both afraid of needles. So this is the compromise.
It's a beautiful August morning, not too hot yet. Good walking weather. I've got Val in the stroller, so Dad of course offers to push, and I let him of course.
He didn't want Angela to get the amniocentesis because of the risks, but she convinced him that it was best to know if either of the twins have abnormalities. The risk of that is greater since she's in her 40s. So he gave in, but he's very worried.
"She'll be OK. All three of them will." I'm hoping to convince myself. I want to be happy about this, that I'm getting two little brothers in a few months, baby uncles for Val.
"I hope so. She's being really brave about all this. The waiting and everything is driving me crazy!" It'll take two weeks before the results are ready.
"I know, Dad. But Angela is stronger than she looks."
"And I'm weaker than I look?"
"You're pretty strong, too."
"Thanks. She did cry the other night."
"Oh, poor Angela!"
"I asked why and she said it's because she realized that the last new movie she'll see this year is Norman's turkey."
I laugh. "I'll treat her to Clueless this weekend." I've been meaning to for awhile, but it's hard to find the time for either of us, especially with her trying to settle things up at the agency.
"Thanks, Sam. You're a good daughter."
"I try."
"So, uh, what's happening with Hank?"
I sigh. "His mother says that he's promised not to sue for custody of Val if I stop seeing Jonathan. He'll 'forgive my past.' "
"What a—" Dad looks down at Val and realizes he shouldn't call her father an ugly name in front of her. "Hypocrite."
"Dad, you're the one who first accused me and Jonathan of committing incest."
"Well, I've mellowed a little on that. I still don't like that you lied about it, but you kids have been great this summer, very mature. And, well." He sighs. "I think you've been good for each other, which I haven't really been able to say of any guy you've dated since maybe Jesse."
"Yes, Jesse raised my political consciousness from vapid consumerism."
"You weren't that bad. Just a teenager."
"Thanks."
"You're welcome. So what does Jonathan think of Hank's offer?"
"He said he'd break up with me if it would help. But why should I give Hank that kind of power over us?"
"Yeah," he says quietly. And I know part of him wishes I'd break up with Jonathan, but another part has the Micelli pride and is glad I have it, too.
"Anyway, maybe it's selfish, but I think Val is better off with me and my wonderful family than she'd be with Hank and Lisa."
"It's not selfish. Hank wasn't the one there through your pregnancy, and he's hardly around her now. And you're a good mom, Sam."
"Hey, I learned from the best."
He smiles and we hug. Then we head back to the doctor's office.
Angela is waiting in the waiting room. Dad runs to her and gives her a big but careful hug. "Are you OK, Sweetheart?"
"Yes, Tony, I'm fine. It wasn't painful, just uncomfortable."
"Good, good. Let's get you home so you can rest."
Angela meets my eyes and we try not to laugh. I think of how she felt smothered by his attention when they were first dating. She even had a nightmare about it! I know from experience how Dad has trouble not being overprotective, and now of course he has an excuse. She's told me that she hopes he won't do every little thing for her when she has to do bed rest.
I can just see them, Angela barking orders into the phone, running her agency out of her room, while Dad tries to simultaneously feed her chicken soup and give her a pedicure. I again try not to laugh.
We go home and Dad puts his arm around her shoulders as he escorts her upstairs for a nap. I shake my head. Then I cut through the kitchen on the way to my apartment. Jonathan's making a late breakfast or an early lunch. We smile at each other.
"Hey."
"Hey. How did it go?"
"OK, I guess. I think Dad's more shook up than Angela."
"Yeah, it's all he's been talking about for days."
"Oh." I forget sometimes that Jonathan hangs out with Dad here on Jonathan's days off, since Dad has the whole month off. They're more relaxed around each other than they were in May. Dad even lets Jonathan help him with the housework. (Jonathan is great with laundry in particular. I used to push chores onto him the few times that Dad and Angela were both busy or gone and expected us and Mona to pick up the slack. Yeah, I was a mean "big sister," but I was only following Mona's example.)
"I hope the results come in before I leave for New Haven."
"Yeah," I say quietly. Yale accepted him for transfer. No more MIT. So he won't have to face Susan and their friends. And he'll be less than half an hour away. But he will be away.
"Hey, don't frown about it. We're still going to see each other. Maybe you can visit me, get out of Fairfield."
We're both thinking Get away from the gossip. I mean, even Diane Wilmington treats me like I'm a slut! Even though I haven't done more than neck in over a year.
"That would be nice."
"Of course, I'll be in the dorms, and whether I can have you stay overnight will depend on my roommate, whoever that is."
"Oh, Jonathan, I don't know if I'm ready for overnight."
"We can just cuddle."
Any other guy, I'd know that was a line. But with Jonathan, he probably means it.
"Well, thank you. But also, I'd have to leave Val overnight, and I'm not ready for that."
"I guess you can't bring her with you, can you?"
"Not unless you want people thinking she's your kid."
"Hm, yeah. I could have a secret wife and child. I bet most of the juniors can't say that!"
I shake my head. I think there might be rumors that Jonathan is Val's father. After all, he did return last summer just a week after Val was conceived, since he wanted to be at my graduation party. And that's close enough timing for gossip. I think she looks 100% Mediterranean, but those are probably dominant genes over blond WASP. If Jonathan and I had a kid—
Oh my God, what am I thinking? I can't have a kid with Jonathan, ever! Dad can barely stomach the two of us dating. Of course, it might be different in five years, if we're still together. I'd be 28 and Jonathan would be 24, not so bad an age gap then, and we could live somewhere where no one knows we're related by marriage. No, no, this is crazy!
"I'm just joking, Sam. You don't have to look so upset."
I shake my head.
"Is it Hank? Look, I told you, we can just drop this if it's getting to be too much for you."
"No, we are not dropping it!" I defiantly throw my arms around him and pull his head down for a huge kiss. He's as startled as when I first kissed him, but this time he definitely responds.
"Hey, hey, hey!" Dad says a minute later.
We break apart, like when Hank caught us last month.
"What the hell are you doing, doing that here? And in front of Val!"
"Dad, she's napping. I don't think we're corrupting her."
"I'm sorry, Tony, it won't happen again."
I look at Jonathan. Why is he apologizing? I started this.
"It better not. You two have a whole apartment to do that in. You don't have to do it in my kitchen."
I look at Dad. In an odd sort of way, I feel like he's given us his blessing more than he has before. He doesn't want us making out in front of him, but I guess he's OK with it if he doesn't see it.
"Jonathan, do you want to come over?"
"Well, yeah, you need someone to help you get the stroller up the stairs, right?"
"Right."
"See you two later," Dad says, as he moves Jonathan's frying eggs out of the way and starts making homemade chicken soup.
"Bye, Dad," we both say, and he rolls his eyes.
"Jonathan, you don't get to call me 'Dad' till you marry her. That was the rule I had for Hank."
Now I roll my eyes. For one thing, Hank was so scared of Dad that it was hard to get him to switch from "Mr. Micelli" to "Tony." But I know that this is one of Dad's jokes to deal with an awkward situation.
"Sure thing, Pop," Jonathan says and punches his shoulder, then we escape, giggling and carrying Val and the stroller, out the back door.
