Chapter Twenty Eight: Into The Abyss

The thing that I knew I would never forget for as long as I lived was the scream that escaped from her lips whilst she was in that state of static. I put my hands over my ears and watched the man stood next to me cry. At that moment I felt so hopeless and I didn't know if there was anything I could do to help. I quietly stepped out of the room and made my way out of the hospital. I rang the only person I could think of who would understand what was going on.

"Hi Gwen." I said when she picked up the phone. I wasn't sure what to say next but Gwen had always been extremely perceptive, it was why she had been picked out for Torchwood.

"Ianto, what's up? I heard over the radio that Sophie had been found nearly dead after being attacked. Rhys has just arrived home so I can come down and help you out. What kind of state is Jack in anyway?"
"It's awful Gwen. I don't know what to do. He phoned her parents and they didn't give a fuck. He would have rang her brother but he's dead so he can't give a fuck. Gwen Jack's the only one that seems to care but the doctors aren't telling him much unless he forces them to..."

"Whoa, Ianto, hold up a minute. Her brother?" she asked me. "I thought she was an only child."
"So did she. But apparently in her only moment of lucidity, she told Jack that Owen wasn't her cousin but her brother. I don't know how this conclusion came about though." I told her, oblivious to the fact that our serious conversation had just turned gossipy and completely off topic.

"Really?" Gwen continued to question me. "How on Earth did she find that out?"

"As I said I'm not entirely sure but it is believed to have been a slip of the tongue from her father."
"No! I can't believe it!"

"Well I can. If you'd had the luxury of seeing the two of them together, you'd get it. They look too much like each other and act too much like each other to be anything but."

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And the darkness surrounded me and there was no escape. The more I tried the denser it got and the denser it got the closer to me it got. The desire to fight the static was leaving me, there was no reason to fight it and I was getting so comfortable in the silent confusion.

But that's when I saw him standing there, looking at me, just as always and I felt ready to be with him once again.

Temptation.


He opened his arms out to me just like he always did and I just wanted to leap into them, I just wanted to hug him and more than anything I wanted to feel alive again.

That was too much temptation.

I ran to him, fighting the darkness and the static even though they refused to let go of me. I didn't give up the fight and eventually I reached him and put my arms around him, so happy that I could hold him once again, devastated as my arms went straight through his torso.

Just a ghost.

Nothing but a ghost.

"Noooo!" I screamed the illusion shattered. I felt myself sink into despair.

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After Gwen had arrived at the hospital, we walked up to the room where Sophie lay, together. We spent a few moments at the doorway watching over her. She looked so serene yet at the same time she looked so tortured.

Our attention was stolen away from Sophie by Jack. He had a look in his eye and I had never seen him look so upset, not even in the moments when he thought I was dying. I felt myself get a bit jealous of the young woman who had so obviously stolen Captain Jack's heart.

He was grappling with doctors and security guards, in his hands were defibrillators and he looked as though he was preparing to shock Sophie. Gwen and I entered the room and found ourselves in complete chaos.

"Mr Harkness, I'm afraid we can't..."

"It's Captain, and I know what I'm doing."

"Jack no!" I cried out, moving towards him. "What are you doing?"

"Jack, you can't do that, its insanity." Gwen told him sternly. "You'd kill her Jack, and then what would you do? You're out of your mind."

At the sound of our voices, the crazed look left his eyes and he slumped to the floor, exhausted.

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"Jack! Save me! Jack!" I screamed at the top of my lungs into the darkness whilst trying not to choke on the solid fog that surrounded me. However there was nothing I could do, I could feel myself drifting slowly into the abyss.

I knew at this point that it would do me no good, he couldn't hear me. I was on my own this time. I had to find a way to save myself before it was too late and I ended up in this darkness permanently.
Then I begin to hear noises.

A scream.

Two screams.

A buzz.

Two buzzes.

And I can hear shouting and it hurts.

I begin to feel my heart wrench away and my insides tear up and I feel tears prick my eyes because I'm in such agony.

And I can feel and it hurts.

The darkness slowly fades and I can see the light under my eyelids, but it's too much too soon.
And I can see and it hurts.

Suddenly the abyss seems like heaven and for a split second I wish I could return to it.

Suddenly the numbness that I felt before seems like heaven and I want to feel it again.And then I do the only thing I can think of to get rid of the physical and emotional and mental pain. I scream.