Pretty long one I think! So hopefully I've pieced together the clues here so previous chapters make more sense and have more purpose now… and also some sweet Defan moments… I'm not sure if they were reference to the books or another fanfic I read… Anyways!


Chapter 29: (I Believe) If I Knew Where I Was Going I'd Lose My Way


Bonnie began shaking her head and pacing in her aggravation. She stopped in her tracks and traced the necklace with her fingertips.

"It's their mother's… Of course! The vision all makes sense now, it probably lead me to the necklace in the first place!" Bonnie thought aloud

"Bonnie what are you talking about?" Lexi asked confused.

"I had this vision!" Bonnie began her anger taking her over, "A vision of Damon's and Stefan's mother. And the necklace, it was there! I didn't know it was about the necklace but that's why I had it! It must be and then I was lead to…!" Bonnie seethed, "Point is! He knew! He knew I needed it! And he's had it this whole time!" Bonnie paused to breathe, "So this… This whole trip was all just some wild goose chase!" Bonnie waved her arms around animatedly in her growing frustration, and Lexi stood not disagreeing.

Bonnie started marching toward the door.

"Where are you going?" Lexi asked.

"I'm going to go make Stefan an only child!" Bonnie yelled.

Lexi sped in front of her.

"Bonnie! Look I'm not going to make any excuses for what Damon did… But… I mean he wouldn't do that!" Lexi stated, "… Not to you. I mean if this necklace means helping you see the people you care about or whatever…" Lexi said trying to think, but sudden realization hit Bonnie and her face must have shown it.

"Unless… Unless it means something else?" Lexi began to question, "Look it was wrong of Damon to lie to you and bring you here under false pretenses but…" Lexi paused. "I just think Damon… Like I said he needs someone like you right now. And this necklace… I'm starting to get the feeling that it somehow means an end of your time together."

"I know…" Bonnie replied, because she did. She understood Damon, and how his actions worked. "Which probably means… That he's only doing this because, he wants me to stay." Bonnie reasoned.

"Yeah…" Lexi agreed, "Look… I'm no friend of Damon's… But you are and you… You probably understand more so than I do, why he's doing all this just to keep you with him." Lexi remarked.

Bonnie thought about this statement and realized what she needed to do next.

"You're right I do." Bonnie replied simply.

Another brief pause took place between the two women.

Lexi then smiled, "So you're not going to kill him then?"

"Not just yet." Bonnie said dryly, "But why'd you talk me out of it?" Bonnie asked.

"What kind of best friend would I be…" Lexi said reminding Bonnie of their last encounter on The Other Side, "… to Stefan if I didn't help out his own brother when he so clearly needs it!"

Bonnie smirked at the vampire in front of her, "You're too good to them ya know that!"

Lexi smirked back, "Look who's talking." And Bonnie laughed at how truthful their statements were. I really glad I got this time with you Lexi… I just wish I had gotten more before. Bonnie thought affectionately, thinking this must be how Stefan feels.

Lexi looked at the door, "He's close." She remarked.

Bonnie looked to the door knowing whom she was referring to, and nodded. Taking a step she paused again, and bit her lip, "He'll do the right thing I know he will." Bonnie said confidently and then placed her hand on the door knob when Lexi replied, "You sure do have a lot of hope for him don't you?" Lexi asked, stopping Bonnie.

She turned to face back to the blonde again, "Well someone has to." Bonnie grinned widely, "Lexi…" Bonnie said quietly now.

"Yeah?" Lexi looked at Bonnie as well.

"I'm really glad I got to meet you…" like this… Bonnie thought.

"Me too!" Lexi smiled and then walked over and grabbed Bonnie into a long tight hug.

Bonnie smiled pulling back knowing if she stayed much longer she'd start crying, and then said lastly, "You should give Stefan a call… I know he'd really love to hear from you."

Lexi laughed, "We always got to keep track of our Salvatore men don't we?" but walked over to the phone ready to do as asked.

Bonnie laughed in agreement and then took one last look at the blonde who smiled and waved goodbye as she began, "Hey Stefan!? Guess who?! Oh I'm sorry did I wake you, day-walker?"

Bonnie headed out the door and then galloped quickly down the apartment stairs, where her physically ran into Damon.

"Going somewhere?" Damon inquired sincerely.

"She doesn't have it." Bonnie began, "The necklace I mean…"

"Really?" Damon continued with his little charade.

"But…" Bonnie added, "She did give me another lead to where it might be." she started a charade on her own. It's not a total lie. Bonnie reasoned with herself.

"Did she?" Damon questioned almost irked.

"She did." Bonnie simply responded, and then walked past him towards his Camaro.

"And pray tell where exactly does this lead, lead to?" Damon asked as he followed her.

"I'll know it when we get there." She mimicked him, "Keys please!" she asked sticking her palm out.

Damon stared at her skeptically, probably wondering how much she really knew now…

"Do you trust me?" she asked earnestly.

"What with my car?" he joked, but she remained serious. He watched her and his resolve seemed to melt, "Yeah I trust you, Bon." He nodded, he went into his pocket, and placed the car keys into her palm his hold lingered as did his stare.

When he finally released his grip and walked over to the passenger's side, as he opened the door he added, "I think I trust you more than anyone right now." Then sat in the car.

Bonnie exhaled a breath she didn't realize she had been holding, then joined him into the car.

As they began on the road again both of them had remained silent.

Damon clearly not enjoying it began to ask a bunch of questions, "So how long do you think it's going to take to get there? Do you think we'll get there before the day is out? Are we going to make any pit stops? Are we?-" Damon carried on spouting off questions.

"Damon!" Bonnie cut him off, and looked at him.

He stared back, "I know I'm distracting Bonnie but you really should watch the road." He smirked at his joke.

She rolled her eyes and did as she was told.

"So you must know my brother as well? In the future?" Damon suddenly asked.

"Yeah of course…" Bonnie smiled thinking of Stefan, and how hopefully that he and future Damon reunited currently.

"And what do you think of him?" Damon questioned.

"Stefan? I think Stefan is nice, thoughtful, and a very warm compassionate person. He's one of my closest friends and I trust him." Bonnie replied innocently without much thought.

Damon became quiet. Bonnie glanced over at him knowing what he was thinking, "But I don't know him as well as you…" she added, "Actually I've always wondered how you two grew up?" Bonnie asked.

"Growing up in the 19th century isn't exactly as exciting as it sounds." Damon replied.

"I meant I just know how close you two were, that your father seemed… harsh, and I know you both lost your mother when you two were very young…" Bonnie paused at the sore subject she had just brought up.

"Yes…" Damon hesitated, "We did. And our father…" Damon grimaced, "I remember Stefan saying that father expressed to him that we weren't to cry at mother's funeral…" Bonnie knitted her eyebrows, What kind of father would tell his youngest that it's not alright to cry at their own mother's funeral?!

"To which I told him, 'That is only because father is not capable of emotions.' And that he could cry if he wanted to." Damon finished, and Bonnie smiled widely.

"So you were very close back then…" Bonnie stated.

"Well… Yes." is what he replied, pausing before he decided to go on, "Before we were vampires, before Katherine once upon a time we were brothers." Damon smiled. "I remember when he was little he'd followed me everywhere. And he'd do anything I told him to…" he laughed reminiscing.

"Before he was born though I remember mother and father pulling me aside to tell me… My father actually seemed excited and of course my mother was more radiant than I had ever seen her. They told me I was going to be a big brother." He sighed, "Then they looked at me like I was supposed to jump for joy and be excited too, and maybe I would have if my father didn't start immediately prattling on and on about how, 'It's an honorable responsibility, Damon.' and blah, blah, blah… But once he left though my mother she pulled me into her arms and told me she knew I was going to be the best older brother anyone could have…" Damon showed a smile of awe, "I was only seven… So I didn't really know what any of it meant and then about nine months later Saint Stefan entered our world. At first all I remember was him crying…" Damon said annoyed, and Bonnie silently laughed at his animated irritation.

"At that point I really wondered why they were so excited to begin with… But then, one night he woke me up with his crying… I went into his nursery probably slightly considering to smother him in his sleep... I stared at him in wonder what all the fuss was about. Suspecting mother or one of the maids to come and comfort him anytime soon… But moments passed and Stefan was still hollering, so absentmindedly I reached over to him and placed my tiny seven-year-old hand on his stomach and began shushing him to calm him down, telling him it was okay that I was there. All the things my mother would say to me when I would get hurt or scared, and then the strangest thing happened…" Damon paused and looked into Bonnie's eyes.

"He stopped crying. He took one of my fingers with his little baby vice grip and looked at me with his big green eyes and then he smiled…" Damon stared wildly into space probably reliving the whole scene in his head, Bonnie imagined that this was the same wild look he gave baby Stefan as he realized what it meant to be an older brother. "In that moment I guess I kind of understood why they were so excited… Shortly afterwards mother and a maid did eventually come in. My mother saw us together and told me she was very proud of me. After Stefan was fed and put back to sleep she took me back to my room to put me back to bed and told me how lucky I was. I asked her, 'What for?' and she replied, 'Receiving a baby's first smile is one of the luckiest things anyone can ever experience!' she kissed me goodnight and I guess from then on I didn't mind having Stefan to look after." Damon said taking a few moments to recompose himself and come back from the memories.

"It sounds like you loved your mother very much…" Bonnie observed.

"I did. She was a very understanding open person. She could make you feel like you were the most perfect person to ever exist… I have no idea how someone like my father ever landed her!" Damon said bluntly, "When she died he somehow became more distance and cold… I think I took most of the brute of his verbal beatings though… Stefan of course always to do what he asked, to not disappoint him, and that's why he was the golden son."

"Well he was lucky to have you to talk to…" Bonnie stated, "I think if he hadn't had you there to look out for him, and tell him that it was alright to cry every once in awhile I don't think Stefan would be the man he is today."

Damon watched her, and Bonnie looked into his eyes earnestly, "I think he is very lucky to have his older brother in his life."


I always think of this… That Stefan and Damon lost their mother so young and having Giuseppe as a father who was very distance and unloving even, it's kind of one of the underlying things that is left unsaid between them. I like to think Damon had a hand in raising Stefan and deserves some of the credit for who Stefan is; that because of Damon, Stefan has all this compassion because he had someone to tell him that it's alright to care and have emotions. Without Damon, Stefan's childhood probably would've been a lot darker. Just something I think about… Something I wanted Bonnie to point out and give to Damon too.