I did promise to update faster didn't I? I just couldn't not keep writing. Also, school is evil but I'm fighting back with sneaky methods.

As for this chapter, this is sort of the turning point we've been building up to so slowly you might not even have noticed. From this point we're definitely heading into serious business.

When I had the idea for this story and came this far in my planning, I was thinking of the chapter in the manga where Sakura has the stupid idea to off and kill Sasuke herself, forcing Naruto to come save her. And when Naruto and Sasuke clash, Naruto thinks of how easily they could have been in reverse positions. That really fascinated me. So anyway this is the chapter where Naruto can no longer run from his past and his insecurities.

Also important is the fact that so far in this story they haven't told each other 'I love you'. This chapter is the reason. I wanted it to be special.

Now that I've already revealed the content in here, go ahead and read. And remember that I am allergic to sad endings.


Chapter twenty-nine: Three words says it all

'

Sasuke hurried a little as he walked from his office on his way to lunch. When he'd gotten the phone call earlier that morning he'd been surprised, he didn't expect Obito of all people to suggest they had lunch together. But he supposed it would be nice; they'd hardly met since after Itachi's wedding, not getting into any private conversations during the New Year's party, and it was an interesting coincidence that he was the boyfriend of Naruto's boss.

When he entered the restaurant he spotted his relaxed relative sitting at a table for two, typing on his phone and seeming as if he didn't have a care in the world. He looked up and smiled brightly when he noticed Sasuke, standing up to shake his hand and greet him.

"Well almost long time no see Sasuke! You've sure grown a bit since last time I met you alone like this!"

"You haven't" Sasuke commented, sitting down and picking up the menu.

"You flatter me. So how are things?"

Sasuke hesitated.

"Well, fine I suppose."

"Not dying from sexual frustration yet?"

Sasuke glared at Obito, a faint blush on his cheek.

"That's none of your business. But it's fine, Yukio is staying with me so I'm not alone."

"Oh yeah that cute little nephew of Naruto's, I wouldn't really have pegged you as a kid person though."

"I didn't use to be."

Obito nodded, an amused twinkle in his eyes.

"He sure seemed to have taken to you during the party."

Sasuke shrugged, but was unable to hide the small almost smug smile dancing at the corners of his lips. They fell silent after that, looking through the menu and eventually ordered.

"You seem a bit out of it though, anything happened?"

Sasuke looked up, realizing he'd been spacing out, and met Obito's sharp eyes. He didn't know Obito that well, but he was a sort of role-model to him besides his brother, and he only hesitated a few seconds before deciding to trust him.

"Have you… noticed anything weird with Naruto lately?" he asked, nervously fiddling with his napkin but putting his hands in his lap when he noticed.

"Hmm, well, he's been slightly moody lately, if that's what you mean?"

Sasuke nodded slowly, thinking back to the conversation they'd had in the morning. Naruto had sounded tired, blaming lack of sleep and too many costumers, but Sasuke got the feeling there was something else behind it.

"I think he's taking the whole getting an education thing too seriously" he mumbled, glancing up at Obito's concerned gaze but opting to avoid it and instead watch the busy restaurant.

Obito was quiet for a moment, gathering his thoughts and searching Sasuke's face. In some ways his relative was much the same as when he was a kid, and in some ways he'd changed drastically. He really wished for him and Naruto to make it together, they were good for each other. On the other hand, he knew exactly where Naruto was coming from. Even if the blond didn't share much of his private life it was easy to read him, and he'd picked up quite a lot from Jiraiya as well.

"It's not easy to have a boyfriend that's much smarter than you" he started gently. "It's the same for me, or well, when I was younger. It takes time to get rid of insecurities, and I'm guessing Naruto is trying to live up to your level at the moment."

"Well he doesn't have to!" Sasuke blurted out, breaking his public character for a moment and letting his worry shine through. "I like him just the way he is" he continued, calming down and running a hand through his hair.

"Well, speaking from personal experience, it's not enough to tell him he's fine the way he is unless he believes it himself."

"I don't understand, he's a great guy, why can't he just see that? Why does he have to feel like he needs to prove anything?"

"Sasuke" Obito said in a voice that reminded him of when his brother gave him a lecture, "how much do you know of Naruto's past?"

Sasuke thought for a moment.

"I know he grew up with his godfather since his parents died, and that he had trouble in school, but I don't think he's ever really told me any details."

Obito nodded, not looking surprised at all.

"You know, when I first met Naruto he was quite the troublemaker. Jiraiya asked Kakashi for a favor and he let him work in the office the summer he was sixteen. In the beginning he played difficult, not wanting to listen and do as he was told, but the second he noticed that we didn't act like his presence was a nuisance and showed him respect when he behaved it was as if he turned into a different person."

Obito smiled, resting his chin in his hand and seeming to go through old memories in his mind.

"He's the typical case of kid that has never been much appreciated simply for existing, and therefore any kind of attention is good attention. I'm not saying Jiraiya and Tsunade are terrible people, I think they did their best with what possibilities they had, but the fact remains that Naruto didn't believe he could do any better than barely pass in school until after that summer. But if you've already spent ten years not caring it's pretty difficult to change things on your own."

"But he had his friends, right?"

"Yeah, and I'm sure they were the reason he hadn't given up before that. But he didn't trust adults."

Sasuke took in all of this in silence, hardly noticing that their drinks arrived. In some ways his and Naruto's childhoods had been very similar, neither of them feeling as if they were good enough in others' eyes. But Sasuke had grown up to be confident in his skills, even though he didn't enjoy his job he was certain of the fact that he was good at it, and that others now saw him as a force to reckon with. Maybe, the difference between them was that he had always been expected to do better, while Naruto had been expected to do worse?

"I think you should just talk to him about it, but it's not the kind of thing you can cure with a snap of your fingers."

Sasuke was staring down at the table, biting his lip, and Obito couldn't help but think he looked so cute all worried like that.

"Just be there for him Sasuke. He might give you all sorts of crap without meaning to, but if you stay with him then I'm sure everything will work out fine."

Sasuke glanced at him, looking a bit dubious but at least he had listened.

"How can you be so sure of all this?" he asked, and Obito chuckled lightly.

"One of the benefits of growing up and becoming an adult" he answered.

"But I'm an adult" Sasuke objected.

Obito chuckled again and shook his head slowly, giving Sasuke a look of pity.

"Oh don't worry Sasuke, you'll get there eventually, and then you'll miss being young and foolish."

Sasuke huffed and crossed his arms, glaring with annoyance at Obito and looking like a pouting child, pretty much proving his point. Even so the rest of lunch went nicely and they ended up promising to do it again soon.

~Line breaker~

Naruto stood by the window in his small hotel room, his forehead pressed against the cool glass as he looked at the depressing scenery. The snow here was mostly gone, just a few sad heaps of grayish slush mixed with pebbles. The only thing that would have completed the picture was if it rained, but the sky was just a light grey, and maybe somehow that was even worse. Sighing he closed his eyes, trying to block out the memories that tried to creep up his spine and invade his brain.

Things were different now. He wasn't the same, even if he might not be so much better. Those dark patches of emptiness had slowly been filled, and even though there had been setbacks he was supposed to be stronger now. He had Sasuke, he had a relatively good job and good friends. There really wasn't anything to complain about.

There was just… this sense of not being satisfied. Of remembering that once he'd believed that he could actually become something, and now in the back of his mind he impatiently wanted to fulfill that wish. And it had nothing to do with Sasuke. Or maybe it was because of Sasuke. Because Sasuke made him believe he could.

But it wasn't enough to just believe. He needed to somehow get stronger, get rid of his insecurities, he was sick of hesitating, of shrinking under the gaze of people that didn't have anything better to do than hurt others. He wanted to find this strength so he could share it with Sasuke.

Clenching his knuckles he saw old memories bursting out of black, sticky bubbles, trying to bring him with them underneath the surface. He'd always been so good at hiding his emotions behind a smile… Gritting his teeth turned his head downwards, his forehead sliding against the glass, the sound of silence expanding in his ears. What was he supposed to do to change?

He could go home, pretend like nothing was wrong, and be happy as long as Sasuke smiled at him, but not while he was alone.

Or he could go home and tell Sasuke about everything, his feelings and memories, his wishes and his pain, and admit all his weaknesses.

He gripped his shirt with one hand, twisting it as he opened his eyes again to stare unseeingly. And then there was the third option…

It was what he was planning to do after high school, the real reason he'd been saving that money. It was what he'd decided to do, sitting in that bar half a year ago when Kiba had dumped him and he was just sick of everything, thinking that since he'd already decided it wouldn't hurt to get rejected by that handsome man that had caught his eye the moment he walked through the doors.

It's funny how the littlest things can change your life so profoundly.

And he knew it was stupid of him to feel as if he couldn't rely on others in this, he was sure that Sasuke could help him. He just felt like this was something he had to do himself, he had to prove to himself that he was capable of taking charge of his own life. But even so…

Sighing he stood up straight again, dragging both hands through his hair and leaving them to grip the strands of hair above his neck.

If only the possibilities to screw up weren't so many.

~Line breaker~

It was Friday afternoon and Sasuke stood with Yukio in his arms at the airport, waiting for Naruto to return. They'd already waited fifteen minutes, but the plane just landed so they had another ten at least to go, and Yukio was squirming impatiently.

"Hey guys" Obito said, coming to a stop beside them, apparently there to pick up Kakashi.

"Hey Obito! Guess what guess what?" Yukio said, instantly brightening up from the distraction.

"What?" Obito asked, grinning at the kid.

"Loook!" Yukio said, dragging out the o and pointing at his hair.

"Oh you cut your hair!"

"No silly Deidara cut my hair!"

"My hairdresser" Sasuke explained.

"And guess what more! He gave me a lollipop! But Uncle Sasu says I can't eat it until tonight."

Yukio pouted and glared at Sasuke, who looked rather uncomfortable feeling the anger directed at him. Obito laughed, but then he curiously looked at Yukio.

"You know, you two look pretty similar now that Yukio's hair is much shorter."

Yukio just returned the curious gaze, but Sasuke looked even more uncomfortable.

"I think I've been seen as a single father pretty much the whole week" he mumbled, making Obito laugh again.

Sasuke huffed, how impossible could it be that a guy was walking around with a child not his own? So many moms had tried to flirt with him every time they went to the playground, complimenting him on his parenting, and everywhere they went he could hear whispered comments about what a cute dad he was. The ones who recognized him and Yukio weren't much better, but they were instead speculating over how great he seemed to be with kids and when he would get ones of his own.

He was twenty-three, not exactly ready to be a dad just yet. Even if he did enjoy spending time with Yukio.

Hmm, maybe getting a kid wouldn't be so bad after all…

No. Bad Sasuke. No such thoughts. He and Naruto weren't even engaged or anything, it was way too early to think about stuff like that!

He was brought out of his musings when Yukio squealed excitedly in his ear, having noticed passengers were starting to arrive in the waiting hall.

"Relax" Obito said. "It's just the ones without any luggage, there's still a few minutes to wait."

"Oh" Yukio said, disappointed.

"Why don't you tell Obito about the movie we watched yesterday?" Sasuke suggested, relieved when the child immediately started chattering, allowing him to sink into his thoughts again.

It was true that there were a lot of similarities between him and Yukio, and the five days they'd spent alone brought up a few more. He'd dug up a few old pictures of himself as a kid, and it was almost scary how alike they were. It had gotten to the point where he contemplated asking his brother if he could possibly have anything to do with it.

But maybe he was just thinking too much, and seeing similarities where there were none. Maybe Naruto's cousin had dark hair and eyes too, he wouldn't know since he hadn't met her yet. This morning he'd woken from a strange dream though, bringing up certain memories he was trying to forget, and he was sure it wasn't related to Yukio at all because it didn't add up, and it was too improbable anyway, but it had been an oddly happy dream…

It really wasn't his business, but when he got around to meeting Karin he would at least ask her if the father could have possibly been one of his relatives (he did have a few of them, and he didn't know them all personally) just for the peace of his mind.

"Uncle Naru!" Yukio suddenly shouted and tried to wriggle out of Sasuke's grip, running off too meet the blond half-way once he'd been put down.

Naruto's face had broken out in a big smile, and he picked the kid up and swung him around, causing loud giggles to escape from him. Then he hugged him and kissed his face all over, ignoring the protesting noises Yukio made, and something caught in Sasuke's throat.

This was the future he wanted for himself.

With him, Naruto, and children.

Naruto was now listening intently to Yukio's probably incoherent words, smiling the whole time.

Yeah definitely children.

And then Naruto glanced at him, an affectionate look in his eyes, especially reserved for Sasuke, and fuck suddenly his knees were all week and his heartbeat sped up. Shit.

Walking over to them in a trance he put his hand on Naruto's back, lips automatically finding his, and he drowned in Naruto's serious eyes once they let go.

"Hey" Naruto said.

"Hey" was all Sasuke could respond with.

"Listen to me!" Yukio said, his palms smacking against their respective cheeks.

"Sorry kid" Naruto apologized, breaking eye contact with Sasuke and turning to Yukio instead. "What did you say?"

And Sasuke felt as if his life was perfect.

~Line breaker~

The evening went by quickly, laughing together, Naruto telling them stories about all the crazy fangirls and what he'd had to do to stop them. But alongside the happy buzz in Sasuke's stomach a vague unease appeared, getting stronger as the hours passed by. There was something about Naruto, the way he sometimes looked at him when he though he didn't notice, how he sometimes fell silent, how sometimes his smile didn't reach his eyes as his thoughts seemed to be in another place.

After putting Yukio to bed Sasuke did the dishes, smiling at Naruto when he came to help him. As Naruto dried them though he seemed distant, and with a sudden churning in his stomach Sasuke thought of his conversation with Obito earlier that week, and how dead-beat Naruto had sounded on the phone Wednesday night. When Naruto had been drying the same plate for five minutes he put the glass he'd just picked up back again, rinsing his hands and drying them off on the towel the blond was using.

"Naruto, is something wrong?"

Naruto startled, glancing at him but looking away quickly.

"No, I'm fine" he said, putting the plate away and starting on another.

"Naruto, don't think I can't notice when something's off." He gently relieved the blond of plate and towel, putting them down on the counter and then took a light hold of his chin, turning Naruto's head so they were face to face. "You know you can tell me anything."

Blue eyes stared into his for a few moments, unreadable emotions flickering over them, and then Naruto sighed wearily. Taking a small step he rested his head on Sasuke's shoulder, inhaling deeply, his hands moving into place around his back. Suddenly worried Sasuke hugged him back, he kissed his temple and breathed in his scent.

What would he ever do without Naruto?

"I'm sorry" the blond murmured against his neck. "I didn't mean to be this out of it."

"Is it about the university thing?" Sasuke asked quietly, one hand moving upwards to trace soothing patterns on the tan neck.

"I guess."

Sasuke was silent, waiting for Naruto to continue.

"I think… I think I need to go away for a while."

Sasuke blinked, wondering if he'd heard him right, but when Naruto raised his head to look at him with worried eyes he realized that he had.

"Go… where?"

"I don't know. Anywhere" Naruto answered, his voice caught, his eyes pleading. "I don't want to but I…"

Sasuke felt as if his head was spinning, and there was something painful wedging itself inside his throat.

"But then, why?"

"I've been thinking about this for a long time, since before high school. I've always wanted to just go somewhere, on my own, where no one knows me. And I just… I can't put it off anymore."

He gripped Sasuke's shirt in his hands, still wearing that pleading look on his face, searching his eyes for any sign of anger, of rejection.

"I have to. I'm not at the same stage in life as you Sasuke, I have no idea what to do with my life, I… fuck I just have to do something or I'll go crazy!"

Sasuke didn't know what to say. His brain was frantically searching for something, anything, what had Obito said? Just be there for him Sasuke. He might give you all sorts of crap without meaning to, but if you stay with him then I'm sure everything will work out fine.

But what if it didn't? What if Naruto left to figure stuff out and figured out that Sasuke wasn't what he wanted?

"Sasuke…" Naruto was saying his name so fearfully, his eyes watering, his lips trembling, matching Sasuke's own.

"Are you sure?" he asked, his voice more broken than he'd intended.

A painful look fluttered over Naruto's face, a small smile fading almost before it started.

"No" he whispered. "It might be the stupidest thing I've ever done, but… I'm at a loss. It's not enough to just… If I don't go, then I don't know how to come back." He swallowed, closing his eyes briefly before letting out a shaky breath. "If you'll let me of course."

Sasuke embraced him tightly, burying his nose in blond locks, his heart beating hollowly in his chest, his body never wanting to let go.

"Don't be stupid, you have to come back" he whispered hoarsely. "I'll never forgive you if you don't."

Naruto clung to him desperately, trying to control his breathing. He hadn't planned for this sudden confession, hadn't planned to say all this, to actually go through with it, but now that the words had been spoken he knew he couldn't take them back. Years and months of hesitating, of finding excuses not to, of second-guessing himself; he just couldn't continue like that anymore.

He just hated himself for doing this to Sasuke.

"I'm so sorry" he mumbled. "I tried so hard to just move on, but all these stupid memories, I have to deal with it somehow. I have to prove to everyone that I'm not helpless. That I can do something on my own."

Sasuke pressed their mouths together, kissing him hard, fingers twisting in his hair; it was pain, sadness, desperation, but also hope, love and a promise. Naruto kissed back just as hard, their lips moving slowly and deliberately, tasting, memorizing, in a wordless form of communication. When they broke it off a lone tear was rolling down Naruto's cheek, and Sasuke carefully swiped it away with his thumb.

"I'll be right here" he whispered. "Come back, and I'll be right here."

Naruto let out a sound that was some sort of mix between a sob and a laugh, and he smashed their lips together again, simply holding them pressed against each other for a few seconds before pulling back again.

"You really are too perfect Sasuke."

"More like, you're worth waiting for."

This time the smile formed fully on Naruto's face, bright and thankful, and Sasuke felt mesmerized by it, falling in love all over again.

Then Naruto turned serious again, his eyes tracing Sasuke's features, returning to meet his gaze again, and suddenly the atmosphere changed, and Sasuke almost couldn't breathe when hit with all the emotions that look gave birth to.

"I love you" Naruto whispered.

Sasuke's chest constricted, his limbs were useless, all sound disappeared as he took in the raw feelings presented to him, Naruto exposing his heart in front of him. He knew that Naruto had never said those words to anyone before. He knew, because they had agreed not to say them until they were sure beyond reversal, beyond regret.

"I love you too" he answered, wide-eyed and shaking, swallowing the lump in his throat as he stared into Naruto's eyes for what felt like eternity, unable to tear away had he wanted to.

That night they made love to each other as if they hadn't seen each other for years, as if they would die without the other's touch, claiming each other over and over again, promises falling off their lips in hot whispers, bodies shaking and minds trembling. There was nothing in-between them anymore, everything was laid bare, and once they'd loved to the point of exhaustion they talked until they fell asleep mid-sentence, past present and future in a confused mix making sense only to them.

Because this wasn't infatuation or attraction anymore.

This was love.

And it was equal amounts of pain and delirium.


It's not easy to live is it? Anyway, I feel as if I fell in love with this story all over again, I hope An accidental marriage won't suffer from this... heh. And I hope you don't think Naruto's decision was too sudden, it's something he's been thinking of in secret, and it's been there underneath the surface all this time, which I think you've noticed. And I didn't write out the last love-making scene and talk, because it would be too long and I don't think I would have been able to picture it as well as it deserves. Oh, and there wasn't so much Yukio in this chapter but he's still with them for another three weeks or so... ;) (btw I love the thought of Obito being like Sasuke's awesome role-model second cousin or whateverXD)