OOOKAy folks, here is how its hangin'. heres the good news!! Exams are over, and so is school so I will definitely be updated more frequently now, and it also seems I have a bit of my mojo back yay! In the words of Alice Cooper... schools out for summer, so I now have about 6 or 7 weeks of hopefully somewhat frequent updates!
woopeee because I really want to finish this story.
So here is chapter 29!
THANKS FOR THE READS AND REVIEWS GUYS!!
STOCKHOLM SYNDROME
Chapter twenty nine : Twisted
The Joker rolled his eyes as he heard the quiet mutterings of his goons. Did they really think that he was deaf and couldn't hear them chattering away in the front of the van about him?
"So why do you think he all of a sudden decided to skip town then?"
"How am I supposed to know? Who knows what goes on in that sick fuck's mind?"
The Joker couldn't help but let out a small chuckle at that comment, unpredictability, always made him feel so much better about himself.
"Maybe he got bored?"
"I don't know. I still think it's got something to do with that fine piece of ass, assistant DA, what's-her-name, the hostage girlie, Rachel".
The Joker sighed, his jaw clenching slightly, he was pissed off.
He mostly pissed off because the minion was correct in saying that it was that fine piece of ass as he so eloquently put it that was the main reason he had decided that Gotham had seen enough of his destruction, at least for the time being.
It wasn't just Rachel, but it was what she had caused, a severe chain reaction of events that The Joker just didn't fancy dealing with.
First off, making him deal with aspects of his past that he didn't really feel like dealing with, it just wasn't something that he felt like doing, if he felt like.... a beautiful shoulder to cry on about watching his mommy and daddy gutted like fish, then he would but it just wasn't something that he felt like doing at that point in time, or ever for that matter.
The Joker inwardly laughed at his sarcastic thoughts.
Not only that, but he could see that Rachel had developed quite an amount of odd 'feelings' for him, it was amusing to say the least but when it got to the point that she was literally throwing herself at him, ready to express her undying love to him, well that was the point where he got the hell out.
He liked her that was not a lie. He liked that she was so different compared to the other 'civilized' citizens of Gotham, a little fight in her. She was a feisty one his Rachel and he had become quite intrigued with messing around with her head just to see what her reaction was.
Only it seemed that as time had passed, the reactions he was starting to get from her, were not quite the ones that he was looking for, interesting still, but brought up a whole new range of problems that made The Joker confused, amused and also a feeling that one might akin to worry.
Worry, that perhaps, maybe getting involved and using Rachel Dawes to get to Harvey Dent and Batman was not the best completely un-planned plan he could of come up with.
The Joker huffed; no Rachel had caused more problems than rewards.
The whole point of holding Rachel hostage was to lure Batman, piss him off, get under his thick batty skin, and crawl inside and see what exactly was hiding underneath.
Twist Harvey Dent around; make him tick by making Rachel tick.
Then it all went wrong, the days, the weeks went by and it became less and less about The Batman and Harvey and more and more about what made Rachel Dawes tick? What could he do to get under her skin and make her crawl?
What exactly did he have to do in order for Rachel to fall a little on the dark side, the bright white little angel.... with devil horns.
She, was all too willing, Pretty Rachel.... she tried to fight, but he really didn't need to do all that much for her to be quivering under his fingers, trembling just for that little bit more of him.
Some part of him revelled in the fact that he could reduce her to a whimpering, begging mess. The other part of him felt sickened by her weakness, the stupid girl, why couldn't she just fight back?
It would probably impress him more if she had just kicked him the balls and spat in his face rather than beg for a fucking.
Of course if she did happen to beg for a juicy fuck, who was he to complain?
She became his addiction, blow up Gotham, play mind games with friendly folk and torture Rachel Dawes all in an average day.
Things seemed to have become complicated extremely quickly.
Hearing Dent tell his story, seeing that Pity in Rachel's eyes, it made him fucking sick.
He was going to kill her, take his knife and slice her up real good, maybe even send a few pieces gift wrapped nicely in a pretty little box to her beloved Harvey for kicks, he was going to kill her and make sure it was real slow. The Joker closed his eyes remembering the relief he felt when he realised that he was going to kill her, just to get rid of her.
To be rid of Rachel Dawes, oh what a feeling... unfortunately it seemed like maybe he had spent just a little too much time with her over the last few weeks because the annoying little bitch had seemed to of crawled her way inside him and he just didn't want to kill her, playing with her was way more fun.
"Oh yeah, she's a cutie that one, why would the boss even care?"
The goon laughed "Maybe underneath he's just like any other man, a sucker for a pretty face".
The Joker smirked "I guess that rules you out doesn't it....Chuckles".
The goons stopped, quickly muttering their apologies before returning to silence.
The Joker's smirk only widened.
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Rachel hadn't moved from the couch, she was too tired, and it seemed that her limbs had decided not to work.
Mara had done a pretty good job in fixing up the wound on her head and was now making them a much needed cup of tea.
Rachel had never been a really big fan of tea, being a busy assistant DA she thrived off Caffeine and coffee had soon become her addiction, long before her addiction to The Joker.
But she was too tired to care, too worn down, and too numb to really care about what was going in her mouth.
She almost laughed, why did she say that? I love him... she repeated it in her head I love him??
She scoffed, "Are you serious?" she muttered under her breath.
Rachel didn't know why she said it; it was like it just burst from her mouth, straight from her brain without even fully realizing it.
She used to have so much control, and now she didn't even have control over the words that came out of her mouth
Another wonderful parting gift from dearest Jack. Rachel felt her stomach clench in an unpleasant knot at the name that ran through her head, she honestly didn't know what it was she was feeling.
If it just burst from her mouth perhaps it was true, why else would she say it.
But she couldn't love him...
The Joker of all people to love, how did she love him?
Their relationship was like a plague; nothing good would ever come out of it, just sickness and pain and from the abrupt way that he had left, Rachel guessed that the sickness and pain was mutual.
She squeezed her eyes shut, trying to rid herself of the thoughts, there was no use in thinking about it, she didn't even have to worry about any of it now, it was over, she could move on with her life.
It was supposed to be a happy thing, Rachel knew that, but she couldn't even muster up the strength to be happy.
It wasn't like she was happy with The Joker constantly there, in fact he made her the most miserable she had ever been in her life, everything that he did, all the words and actions brought her nothing but misery, even with the pleasure there was the pain of knowing what she was lowering herself too.
So, he made her miserable but it seemed she couldn't be happy when he wasn't there either.
Rachel sighed, Life just wasn't fair and so it seemed, neither was love.
"There we are, nice cup of tea... it should make you feel a bit better" Mara's voice entered the room as she walked in holding two mugs.
Mara placed the hot mug in her hand, and she supposed it should have scolded her hand, but the heat didn't seem to bother her at all.
"Thanks" Rachel muttered.
Rachel could see out of the corner of her eye, Mara trying desperately not to stare at her, but she couldn't wipe the thoroughly confused look off her face.
She had not said anything since Rachel's little announcement, she simply nodded her head and continued cleaning her wound before announcing that she was going to make some tea.
It only made Rachel feel more awkward than she already did, if that was at all possible.
Rachel's fist clenched around the mug she was holding, a slow building anger burning through her.
Why couldn't Mara just say what she wanted to say, say what she was thinking?
It seemed to her, that everyone lied and nobody ever said what they really meant, always hiding the truth behind false smiles.
That was something that she was always fascinated with about The Joker, he always said what he was thinking, he never held back and no matter how disgusting he was, Rachel supposed that was something to be admired.
She tried to block out Mara's stares, those little looks that meant so much.
'She thinks I'm crazy now, great!... that's me crazy Rachel' she thought her grip tightening even more.
Finally the tension in the room became too much,
"Just say it Mara" Rachel said, not bothering to look at Mara's faux confusion.
"W...What... Uh ....say what?" Mara stuttered.
Rachel slowly turned her head to face Mara, her face was calm, no accusing glare marred her face but in her eyes was a look of tiredness that had not been there before.
"Say....what you're thinking.... about me" Rachel said drawing out her words as if she was talking to a child.
Mara turned away, seemingly unable to meet Rachel's intense look.
"Oh..... "Groaning Mara shook her head, before letting out a nervous laugh "I'm sorry Rachel, I am..... but... this whole thing is really starting to freak me out.... which is saying something my dear friend because I am slightly twisted myself but...... loving The Joker... is a little bit too far".
Rachel didn't know why exactly, but her face broke out into a large toothy grin, laughter escaping her mouth.
It seemed this only made Mara more confused.
"You're right... You are absolutely one hundred per cent right... I'm wrong.... I'm so wrong it's not even funny, god it's so wrong".
Rachel's laughter only got louder, it seemed the numbness she had been feeling was ebbing away revealing nothing but twisted amusement, why exactly it was funny, she had no idea.
Mara frowned slightly "Something certainly seems funny" she muttered.
Rachel barely even heard her, her laughter too consuming, to her own ears, the laughter sounded off, didn't sound like her laughter.
The loud cackles were underlined with sadistic amusement, something that was so familiar to her.
It was this disturbing familiarity that caused a gut wrenching sob to mix with her laughter.
She felt Mara's hand gently pat her on the back soothingly but it did nothing to stop her sobs or her laughter.
"Okay.... You're kind of... starting to scare a wee bit now" Mara said
Rachel's laughter was bordering on painful for her now, the sobs ripping from her throat, the laughter choking her.
She couldn't even get a breath in, her lungs were closing in on her and she couldn't breathe.
God, she couldn't breathe.........
It was no longer The Joker she was crying about, or laughing about for that matter, it was herself.
How..... Crazy she had become. How twisted she had become. Twisted enough to hear The Joker in her voice, to hear The Joker in her laugh, to see The Joker when she looked at herself in the mirror.
This is what she had become.
Rachel Dawes, she had always tried to do the right thing, it was the one thing that she had always been sure about in her life, even in the most messed up times.
Do the right thing
Be a good person
"God!" Rachel moaned burying her face in her hands; she wanted to hide her face. Her shame was eating away at her. She couldn't let Mara see her. She'd never be able to let anyone see her now, Not Harvey, not Bruce or Alfred or her other friends and family....
The only person that she could allow to see her now was the person who had put her where she was in the first place...and he was gone. He screwed her up in the head, laughed at her, then split.
"That fucking prick!" She screamed into her hands. "I hate him... I hate him... I swear to god if I ever see him again....... I'm going to cut that motherfucking freak's dick off".
Rachel tried to catch her breath as she recovered from her outburst.
Slowly she raised her head to look at the woman sitting next to her, a mixture of fear and sympathy written across her face.
"Blimey..... Quite a mouth you got on you don't ya......" Mara said her mouth slightly agape.
Rachel sniffed, wiping the tears from her puffy cheeks. "You must think I'm nuts Mara".
Mara nodded "Yeah... a little"
"What am I going to do?.........I don't even know... everything is so screwed up"
Mara paused, as if she was seriously thinking about what she was about to say, it made Rachel feel slightly nervous. Almost as if she was afraid of saying the wrong thing.
"Look Rachel, like I said, you've been through so much.... I think.... maybe you need to talk to someone... Harvey maybe-"
Rachel cut her off before she could say anything else, her voice hysterical "No... How could I ever tell Harvey about....any of this. It would ruin everything.. The look on his face, could you imagine the look on his face. He'll look at me... how I look at me"
"How's that?" Mara said.
Rachel scoffed shaking her head "A disgusting slut who let a murderous fiend touch her, who let someone who's dead inside make her... feel about him".
"Right... okay so maybe you don't have to tell Harvey everything... Or maybe you should talk to someone... like a doctor or something of the sorts?" Mara said.
Rachel's eyes narrowed slightly "You mean a shrink... Mara, if I told a shrink... half of the things that have been going on with me.... With me and The Joker... they'd send me to a padded room in Arkham!"
Mara's eyes filled with something that Rachel saw as pity, Mara felt sorry for her. Rachel felt her body tremble with anger, she hated pity, she hated the look in their eyes.
God, those pitying eyes, she just wanted to the cut them out of her head so she wouldn't have to look at them.
"Don't pity me" Rachel mumbled glaring slightly.
"Look I'm Sorry... but I really do think this is all just you being confused.... spending all that time with The Joker.... it made you see things a little differently, it doesn't mean that its love Rachel... it's just... its.. Empathy"
Rachel's face softened, "Stockholm Syndrome..." she said nodding.
Mara nodded "Exactly..."
There was an almost calm silence that filled Rachel's apartment as she took in Mara's advice.
Rachel sighed "Maybe you're right... maybe... I should see someone.... "
Mara nodded again "I think it will help.... The freak's gone now; it can help you put all this freaky-assed psycho crap behind you".
"Okay... god I'm just so tired..... I feel like I haven't slept in weeks" Rachel said rubbing her tired and sore eyes.
"Come on then, off to bed with you Miss Dawes, because frankly girlie, you need it" Mara said once again eyeing her up and down.
Rachel rolled her eyes, she knew she must look awful but she thought that Mara would have the good sense not to throw it in her face at her most vulnerable point.
"And once again, thank you for that.... Look thanks for coming over here Mara, thank you for... being my friend and for not... judging, you don't have to stay I'll be fine by myself.... something tells me he won't be making an appearance for a long...long time"
It looked as though Mara had barely listened; she shook her head while she helped Rachel off the couch and gently lead her towards her bedroom.
"No no and... NO. I don't have a shift at the hospital till' tomorrow, you're my friend, you're in a bit of a rough point, I'm going to stay and take care of you....besides you have a head injury, you should be in hospital, I want to stay here and make sure that you're okay".
There was a look of determination on Mara's face that gave Rachel the strong impression that nothing she said would make her change her mind, she figured that she could try and literally kick her out but frankly she just didn't have the strength.
"Fine.... and thanks" Rachel said before entering her room again.
Rachel frowned, how odd it was too actually have such a close friend again.
It had been such a long time since she had a really close female friend, and her relationship with Bruce was somewhat on shaky ground at that point in time.
It felt like new territory to have a good friend who cared but it felt nice.
She sunk into her bed, burying her face in the pillow, she inhaled.
It smelt like him, that odd smell that always lingered around him, the smell that she could never really identify, it still hung in the air, even hours after he had left.
She felt another tear leak from her eye; this was going to be harder than she thought.
Breaking an addiction normally involved lots of relapses, only she couldn't get her fix because there was only one Joker in the world and he was gone.
Something then caught her attention in the corner of her eye; Frowning Rachel leaned over to see a familiar looking Jack card sitting on her bed side table.
Only this one had something else written on it,
Things come back
It was surrounded by a dozen sadistic looking red 'HA's'.
Rachel was confused, what did this mean? Did it mean that The Joker was going to make a return to Gotham in the future?
she knew deep inside that this was not a good thing, but it didn't stop her from grasping the card in her hand and curling up into a ball.
"Come back..." she whispered as she drifted to sleep.
eek. I know its not my best.
but its been awhile hehe
Oh well there are aspects that I like and aspects that I dislike about this chapter.
my favourite parts definitely writing The Joker's POV ... even if he is extremely hard to write
XD
hope you all like it anyway
R&R
