Shadow can't stop killing

I've got to stop partying so much…it gets in the way of this fic!

Espio: I'm still angry. I didn't like acting like Sherlock Holmes!

Jack: But you're a detective!

Espio: But I like acting more like…(does a side roll, then shoots with an imaginary pistol) Jack Bauer!

Jill: You mean from 24? (laughs)

Jack: Hey! If you woke up this morning, it's because Jack Bauer spared your life!

Jill:…True. (looks up on laptop) WHOOOOOAAAAA…you won't believe this!

Jack: What is it?

Jill: I was searching for random things on Google and I found…THIS FIC!

Jack: No way! On Google? (prances around happily) NO (bleep)ING WAY!

Jill: In light of this awesome news, let's get to the reviews…

Ok, now have Cream thrown to the TailsxCosmo fans!
-Pokelad

Cosmo: Heehee! This is fun! (grabs Cream, chucks her off stage) See you in hell!

TailsCosmo fan girls: (charge at Cream with battle cries)

Cream: (screaming as she is dragged away)

Jack: That was simple to do…

hi!
oh, dares,right.
sonic:you are free to do what ever you want to any character in this fic.
shadow:(puts him on a sugar high,gives him every weapon known to man)do what you want.
knuckles:go into the closet with jill
everyone that has a super form:SUPER FORM FIGHT!
MUAHAHAHAHAHA!MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
-Gunslinger 117

Sonic: (grins) Well, I've feeling kind of horny so…my only problem is deciding whom!

Jill: (draws a wheel of "fortune") Here you go! All of the ladies' names are on here! Just spin the wheel and choose!

Sonic: (spins wheel, and it lands on…Cosmo) Whoa! I get to sleep with her? Interesting…

Cosmo: But I don't want to!

Jack: Too bad! (points a flamethrower at her) Now do it!

Cosmo: (goes into closet with Sonic)

Tails: Must…kill…

Jack: Hold back your killing urges for later…

Shadow: (gets hyper, accepts weapons) IT'S…KILLING TIME! (shoots everything in sight)

-Later-

Jack: (climbs out of rubble) How many times is this stage going to be destroyed?

Janitor: I'm the one who has to keep cleaning and rebuilding it…stupid (bleep)ing kids, with no respect…(starts rebuilding stage)

Shadow: In my defense, I love killing!

Knuckles: (looks nervously at Jill) I am sooooo (bleep)ed.

Jill: OMG! I 3 Knuckles! (If you don't know what she's talking about, turn your head 90 degrees clockwise)

Knuckles: (is dragged into closet as Sonic and Cosmo are kicked out) AHHHHHHH!

Cosmo: Heehee…for once, I had sex with someone besides Tails!

Tails: Stupid karma…just because I slept with Cream…(continues grumbling)

Jack: So, how was it?

Sonic: It was good! It felt so…natural. And dirty!

Jill: I think Super Dragon is going to call for blood for this happening…

Jack: (gives out Chaos Emeralds)

Everyone who can: (turns into super forms)

Jack: (schoolyard chanting) FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT…

Super Shadow: Chaos Blast! (blows everything up…yet again)

Everyone else: (perishes…with one exception)

Super Tails (or is it Turbo Tails?): Ha! My birds took the hit for me!

Super Shadow: Fine then. Chaos Spear! (stabs Super Tails, killing him)

-Later-

Jack: (revives everyone…again) We've had plenty of destruction already, and we're not even halfway through yet!

Jill: Let's get to the anonymous reviews, starting with two from the same reviewer that we decided to combine…

Hey got some great ideas.
Have Sonic and Shadow go hyper mode (hyper is the stage past super) then fuse together into hyper Shadic. Jack is free to do whatever he wants with Shadic.
Intro of the Tails doll. I think you know what to do with this guy.
Have the Sonic CD Amy come and start a fight to the death with the current Amy for sonic. winner takes sonic to the closet.
Mario & Amy in the closet.
Sonic & Peach closet again.
That's it for now more later
Also you can't have Mario and Sonic together without having a
Mario, Sonic, Link, and Samus deathmatch to be the greatest video game character of all time.
-Samari45

Jack: (gives powered up Chaos Emeralds to Sonic and Shadow, then fuses them)

Hyper Shadic: Fun! What do we do now?

Jack: Kill Eggman. Please!

Hyper Shadic:…Okay. (blows up Eggman, beats him up, sets him on fire, and gives Eggman a heart attack)

Everyone: Hooray!

Jill: (comes out of closet with Knuckles) That was boring! You have the ultimate super form here!

Jack: Fine. I order you to go out to all other anime worlds out there and kill every villain in them!

Hyper Shadic: That's more like it! (flies off)

-Later-

Hyper Shadic: It's done. They were still too easy!

Jack: I give up on ideas. (splits up Hyper Shadic) Let's just continue...

Jill: (brings in Tails Doll) Here he is…another robot!

Tails: (looks at Eggman) You seriously think that piece of junk could replace me? You're so unoriginal!

Eggman: Hey, I'm just trying to make an equal match for each of you!

Sonic: Equal? (laughs) Do you know how easy it is to kick Metal Sonic's ass?

Eggman: (glares)

Tails Doll: Hello.

Jill: (ducks behind some bushes) AUGH!

Jack: You don't really believe in that curse, do you?

Jill: YES I DO! If you play the Sonic R song backwards, you meet the Tails Doll in real life and he tries to take your soul…(fetal position)

Jack: (plays song backwards) I can't hear you!…Whatever. (fails to notice a nearby suspicious looking red light)

-Later-

Jack: Holy (bleep)! I'm never going to not listen to you again!

Jill: I told you so! The Tails Doll came out and tried to take your soul!

Jack: Thankfully, it's surprisingly killable! (laughs evilly)

Jill:…We'll see about that…

Jack: Alright! Here's the original, Rosy the Rascal! (brings her in)

Amy: Who's this bitch? Sonic's supposed to be saving me!

Rosy: Um…well, he saved me first!

Amy: ARE YOU THREATENING ME?!

Rosy: No, I-

Amy: YAAAAHHHH! (tackles Rosy, totally kills her)

Jack: Wow…Rosy was such a Mary-Sue! No wonder Amy killed her so easily!

Amy: Now I shall accept my trophy…(grabs Sonic by his tail, drags him into closet)

Sonic: Ow! Ow! You don't need to drag me in by my tail-Ow!

Mario and Peach: (come on stage)

Mario: (reads first dare) Yay! (reads second dare) Ohhhhhhh no…

Peach: I don't want my Mario touching that hedgehog! DO we have to?

Jack: Of course!

Sonic: (comes out of closet with Amy, notices Mario and Peach) What are they doing here?

Jill: Today…it's Wife Swap: Sonic Style! Except the spouses go a little further here than they do in the TV show…(shoves Mario and Amy into closet)

Sonic: Hold it right there! My rival's sleeping with my lover? That's crazy…

Jack: And hilarious! But don't worry, you get to have vengeance on him…

Peach: I'm not having sex with a hedgehog! Even if that bastard I call my boyfriend will…

(moans start increasing in closet)

Sonic: Damn it…this sounds like Amy's enjoying it!

-Later-

Mario: (comes out of closet) Mamma mia! Your lady is hot! (receives a slap from Peach)

Sonic: (glares)

Amy: I STILL WUV YOU THOUGH, SONIC! (glomps Sonic)

Sonic: Let…go…please…

Jill: And now for the other couple!

Peach: Again, I'm not having sex with a hedgehog!

Jack: (sighs) Time to do what I had to do to convince Cream into the closet in chapter 20…AUTHOR POWERS! (makes Peach's clothes disappear)

Fan boys: (cheering)

Peach: Damn you! (runs into closet with Sonic)

Sonic: I'm a lucky man tonight!

-Later-

Jack: Time for the ultimate Brawl! Right here on stage! (brings in Link and Samus) Go!

Sonic: (gets stabbed, shot, and burned all at once) AAAAAUUUUGH! (is killed)

Mario: (is then shot and stabbed) NOOOOOOOO! (is also killed)

Jill: Now it's between Link and Samus!

Jack: While that ultimate battle goes on, we'll continue with our reviews…

okay i can barely think cuz of all the humor but i came up with this.
blaze:makeout with shadow and tell silver that you never want to do him ever again cuz shadow is way better than silver
sonic:bow down to eggman for the rest of this chapter and say he is the best.(i hate eggman but i want to torture sonic)
knuckles:makeout with jill without complaining
tails:kill charmy some more
shadow:admit that you think blaze would be a better match for you than the other girls
silver:watch blaze makeout with shadow,realize that she likes him better,and not care
knuckles:...idk...make out with rouge
rouge:you cant slap knuckles
thats all plz use these dares!
-Safarithecat

Blaze: Silver's not going to be very happy with this…(kisses Shadow)

Shadow: Mmm…this is fun…

Silver: Blaze? But…I thought you liked me!

Blaze: Sorry, Silver. I don't want to do you again because…well, Shadow's better!

Silver: (shrugs) Meh.

Jack: Wow…I thought would run off crying again!

Silver: I'm not supposed to! Otherwise I would…

Sonic: (revived) Aw man! This (bleep)ing sucks! (bows to Eggman) You're…the best…(walks off depressed)

Eggman: Haha! I knew that idiot would admit it someday!

Jill: And now for more making out! (grabs Knuckles, starts a passionate makeout session)

Tails: Okay…it gets boring after a while, though! (locks Charmy into a room, then fumigates it)

Charmy: Hey….you wanna get high, maaaaaaannnnn….(dies)

Jack: Woot for extermination!

Shadow: Um…I guess she is pretty hot…so she might be the best match…

Jill: No! You have to say she is!

Shadow:…Fine. For your sake, I'll say she is the best match for me. Happy?

Knuckles: (makes out with Rouge) Mmmm…delicious!

Rouge: Awww….alright, I guess that I should stop teasing so much…(starts kissing Knuckles back)

Jack and Jill: (form a secret fan girl/fan boy alliance to work together in acquiring their bishie/sex symbol)

Jill: Hehe…this conspiracy should help get us Knuckie and Rouge…

Jack: And now let's get to a third one from this reviewer…

Jack and Jill in the closet.
I haven't seen Jack go in there yet so thought I'd give the idea.
-Samari45

Jill: Fine…I guess…(heads into closet with Jack)

-A few minutes later-

Sonic: (opens closet door) Hey! What are you doing?

Jill: (puts down a card hand) I have 21! I win!

Shadow: You two were playing card games in the closet?

Jack: Of course! What else is there to do in a dark, lonely closet?

Everyone: (falls down anime-style)

Blaze: You know…what you've been doing with us all other times!

Jill: Oh, that? Well, I'm tired out for today…

Jack: Besides, I'm too busy looking at Rouge's…most noticeable features…to bother with Jill!

Rouge: (glares)

-Meanwhile-

Link: (finally kills Samus) Yes! Now I can head back to…(shudders) all of the Zelda Truth or Dare fics out there…(walks away depressed)