"We're going to have a traditional Mitchell dinner tonight at Phil and Shirley's, but we're cooking." Ronnie said one morning to Katy. The teenager looked up from the cartoons she'd been watching with Amy and stared at her older sister.
"Are you insane?" Katy asked. She had never been to one of the famous Mitchell family dinners, but had heard enough stories about them, mainly from Roxy and Jay. They seemed like a laugh, but always ended in drama.
"No." Ronnie snapped, annoyed at her sister's lack of enthusiasm. "And you're going to help me cook."
"What?" Her sister whined. "Why?"
"Because it's a bonding exercise. We can get to know each other better." Ronnie said, pulling a packet out of the fridge and banging it onto the counter. Katy rolled her eyes and pulled herself off the sofa.
"We already know each other." She said, tying her hair up nevertheless. "And why do we need to bond?"
"If you're going to be like this…" Ronnie said, slamming things around. Katy caught hold of her older sister's arm and smiled at her.
"Of course I'll help." She said. "I was only kidding."
Ronnie smiled and threw an apron at her. "We'll start with the pudding."
For a while they made small talk, gossiping about their neighbours, laughing and messing around. After about half an hour, Roxy arrived and decided she would help as well. It was nice, the three of them spending time together. Even little Amy got her hands dirty.
"What was it like?" Ronnie asked suddenly, her tone becoming very serious. "Your childhood?"
"What?" Katy was taken aback by her sister's sudden question. They were sitting round the table having a tea break. Rather than having to make eye contact, the teenager suddenly became very interested in the bits of dough attached to her hands. "It was hard."
"Not having a dad?" Roxy asked quietly.
"Sort of… but not really." Katy said confusingly. "What I mean is I never had a dad, so I never really missed it. Mam never had any boyfriends or anything… she was still waiting for Archie to come back. But of course he never did."
"Did she really think he would? Come back, I mean?" Ronnie said, leaning forwards slightly. Katy looked at her and nodded.
"She refused to admit that he'd abandoned us. He could never do anything wrong in her eyes. But then again, she was ill. I never really told anyone what it was like when I was a kid. No one ever wanted to hear."
"I do." Ronnie said gently, holding her sister's hand.
"Me too." Roxy agreed, taking the other one and squeezing it.
"I knew that she was ill when I was really little. It's my first memory; knowing my mam wasn't normal. She was diagnosed with depression when I was eight, but there was more to it than that. When I started school she used to tell me not to listen to anything they said because they would try to brainwash me. She couldn't stop me going, because it was the law, but I wasn't allowed to listen." Katy sighed. "I was so embarrassed of her. She'd come to pick me up in her nightie and slippers. All the other kids would laugh at her and I'd laugh too, because she was the local nutter."
"Why didn't you get any help?" Ronnie asked.
"Because I'm a Mitchell." Katy said with a weak grin. "That's what mam used to say; I wouldn't admit I needed help because I had Mitchell blood. We lived on this really tough estate. Our flat got broken into eight times in one month; not that we had anything worth nicking. In the end our neighbour phoned the doctor because she was fed up of seeing me looking like I'd been neglected. They put her on medication, but that didn't do anything. By the time I was twelve she was on so many tablets that it took me a good five or ten minutes to sort them for her."
"You did that, on your own?" Roxy said stunned.
"What choice did I have?" Katy replied with a sigh. "I'd phoned Archie and he said that none of you were interested in us."
"He said that?" Her younger sister was shocked. "He never told us…"
"Archie told mam that he'd told both of you about me and you didn't care. Mam's best friend Jane, who used to live next to you, said that wasn't likely and that neither of you, especially Ronnie, would have ignored their baby sister. I didn't know why it was 'especially Ronnie' for ages, not until I got here and heard about Danielle."
Ronnie flinched at the mention of her daughter, which both her sister's noticed. Katy opened her mouth to apologise but Ronnie pre-empted her and shook her head. "It's OK. She was right; we would never have ignored you if we'd known."
"Auntie Peg said something about you having a record…" Roxy said slowly, not wanting to annoy her sister. She thought that seeing as Katy was telling them a lot, she might share that too.
"Yeah…" Katy said with a wry smile. "I told you I lived on a tough estate. The main past times for us kids involved getting into trouble. I was always small and skinny and the older kids found me useful for getting into houses that they couldn't."
"You were a burglar?" Roxy exclaimed, shocked. Her sister nodded.
"I was pretty good at it too. Never got caught once." She sighed. "But mam got really bad when I was fifteen, just before actually. We got moved into a nicer area; we got given a house and everything. I decided then and there to turn my life around. Not that it was worth it."
"What d'you mean?" Ronnie asked, looking at her hard.
"I got pregnant not long after we moved and my boyfriend dumped me. I had an abortion because I couldn't cope with mam and a baby. I couldn't just abandon mam and there was no one else… for a while I started stealing her pills, just to get through the days. But then days turned into weeks and months and I was still taking her pills. Maybe if I hadn't had the abortion… maybe if I hadn't stolen her pills… well maybe she wouldn't have killed herself." Katy said angrily, banging her head on the table.
"Don't say that, Katy." Roxy said seriously. "Never say that."
"She's right, though." Ronnie said quietly. "You do wonder. I've often thought about it. Maybe if I hadn't ignored Danielle, maybe if I hadn't taken her to get that abortion… maybe she wouldn't have died and maybe I'd even have a grandchild now."
"Listen, yeah." Roxy said, more serious that Katy had ever seen her. "What's done is done and nothing we can do will change it. It's just us three, Amy and this little one in here." She touched Ronnie's stomach lightly. "We're closer than ever and we will be OK. I promise."
