Alex splashed cold water on his face then rinsed his mouth out…swigging a mouthful of handy mouthwash from the side of the sink to try to take away the taste. He sighed and stared at his reflection…his hair was wild, eyes rimmed in dark shadows, his shin pale…he looked tired, he WAS tired…he looked…scared. He WAS scared. He took in two deep breaths and glanced around the bathroom as he tried to calm himself, taking in all the bottles of shampoos and conditioners…shower gels and bath gels…he marvelled at just how many bottles there were, chicks and the stuff he thought as he cautiously reached out to read some of the labels. He stopped at one of the fancier ones, and slowly lifted it up…unscrewed the lid…and took small sniff, before breathing in more deeply…
"Alex? Stop daydreaming!" Arizona said as she gently elbowed him in the ribs before noticing how he was leaning in towards her. "Alex…what the hell are you doing?"
"I uh…uhm…" he blushed furiously as he opened his eyes and realised he was practically leaning into Robbins neck. "Sorry…but uh…you uhm…you smell real nice!"
"Really nice" Arizona corrected him, grinning slightly as she saw him blush even more. "And thanks…even though it is…kinda creepy!"
"Sorry" he muttered
"It was a new shower gel Callie bought me" Arizona told him as she signed off on another patients notes and turned to walk with him to their next patient. "It is kind of expensive but she bought if for…special occasions!" she grinned and wiggled her eyebrows at him…chuckling to herself as yet again Karev blushed, right to the tips of his ears. "It's incredible stuff…you only need a little bit….leaves your skin feeling so soft…silky…touchable…"
"Sounds uh…great!" Alex cut in quickly, shoving his hand in his pocket and pushing passed her to enter their patients room.
Arizona hung back a fraction and muttered. "It is great…it's…incredible!"
Alex had heard her though, and nearly stumbled over the patients bed
His eyes were closed as he breathed in the scent, but he was brought back to reality by a small tap on the door. "Alex?" he heard Callie call softly, "Are you ok? I'm uh…I'm getting a bit worried out here!"He hurriedly put the lid back on the bottle and went to put it back on the shelf, knocking several bottles flying to the ground in his haste. "Alex?" Callie called out again…"ALEX?"
"I'm ok!" he said as he reached to open the door a fraction, "Really…I'm fine…I just uh…I uh…" he looked down at the floor to try and think of something to explain, but Callie had already spotted the bottles he had knocked over and arched an eyebrow at him. "I…I'm sorry" he breathed out…"I'll pick them up"
"Alex, let me in ok…we need to talk I think"
"In the bathroom?"
"Just" she pushed passed him, "let me in"
He sighed and leaned back on the sink as Callie pulled down the toilet seat and lid and sat down. She pointed at the bottles and gave a small smile. "I did that this morning…I even used her shower gel…anything to just hold her closer to me. "She hates me using her gel…." She chuckled as she reached out and picked up the same bottle Alex had been holding. "Except this one…she doesn't mind me…sharing…this one!" Callie gave a small sob and bit it back as she closed her eyes and leaned back
Alex took a deep breath and whispered. "I'm sorry"
Instantly Callies head snapped up and her eyes fixed on him. "This ISN'T on you Alex…I keep telling you that"
"I try to do the right thing, I try" he whispered, "But I just keep screwin' up. I'm a screw up!"
"Don't you dare say that!" Callie slapped at his thigh, her face scrunched up as she repeated. "Don't you dare! Arizona has put a lot of time and effort into training you…she has made you one of the best peds surgeons around…you're not a screw up…she wouldn't let you be!"
"I let her down…again" he said with a shake of his head, his gaze locked on the bathroom floor. "I looked out for myself. I was selfish and thoughtless…and I let her down. I hurt her"
"Yes" Callie whispered, "you hurt her. But only because she hates the thought of you leaving! Alex…do you know why she has put so much effort into training you?" He shook his head before glancing shyly up at Callie. She gave a small sigh. "Because she likes you Alex…a lot. She sees so much potential in you…as a surgeon…as a human being! She sees how amazing you are…how big your heart is…how much love and compassion you are capable of. She sees…herself in you…you remind her of herself…..without the heelies!"
"So far!" Alex gave a small grin back
"So far!" Callie agreed with a soft chuckle. "Alex…she loves you"
"I shudda been on the frickin plane Callie!" he yelled back, "It should have been me….Arizona doesn't deserve this…she doesn't!"
"And neither do you!" Callie said softly. She took in a shaky breath before saying. "Did you know Arizona had nightmares for months after our car accident? Months! Blamed herself completely…kept blaming herself over and over gain…kept replaying the crash…over, and over again. But…so did I! And I blamed myself! I was the one who took off my seat belt…if I hadn't I wouldn't have gone through the windscreen. I was the one who distracted Arizona by not…not answering her very important question! I was the one who was in a mood and wound Arizona up…I was trying to text Mark knowing full well it was upsetting her…our weekend away from it all and I kinda brought Mark with us to! Huh…figure. All those things…all of them…to me…caused the accident. If I hadn't distracted her so much, would she have seen the truck sooner? Would we have been able to slow down or avoid it? IF I had my seat belt on would I have just walked away with a scratch or two?" She gave a small shake of her head. "Truth be told…it was an accident. Full stop! The truck was on a blind bend…we couldn't have seen it any sooner…and if Arizona had tried to steer around it we probably would have hit it side on…my side…and I would still have been hurt. So…neither of us were to blame…but we had so many sleepless nights…each carrying our own guilt. Don't do that Alex…don't. It is not your fault!"
"I got her pissed at me. She shouldn't have been anywhere near the damn plane. The…the crash…may still have happened….and that may be an accident" Alex ran his hand through his hair and gave a deep sigh, "but it should have happened with ME on board…it should be my sorry ass out there …not…not hers"
Callie reached for his hand and gave a small nod. "Things happen for a reason Alex, bit Arizona and I believe that. I was meant to be in Joes bar drowning my sorrows the first time Arizona went in after work for a drink…she spotted me and followed me in to the ladies to …uh…talk to me. It's how we met. But that night…I had been so close to just going straight home…and Arizona had been wondering whether to go to Joes the next night…"
"You two were meant to be together…some how…sooner or later you would have met" Alex said with a small smile
"Uh huh…probably. Fate would have brought us together I guess. Just like it did after you handed Arizona her ass on a plate with some epilepsy cardio misdiagnosis…she was late leaving work and just happened to get in to my elevator…to apologise for …uhm…well another meeting we'd had earlier…but she apologised and asked me to dinner…the rest, as they say …is history!"
"Which I have now ruined by…."
"Yeah, yeah, not getting on the plane" Callie looked at him and grinned a fraction. "Arizona had been through a REALLY bad day….maybe if Nick hadn't been in this hospital, maybe if his operation had been…successful….maybe if Hunt hadn't asked her about you and Hopkins just ten minutes after she had walked out of he dying friends room…then maybe, just maybe you would be on the plane…and I wouldn't have had to pack away my chocolate body paints!"
"Torres!"
Again Callie smiled at him as she looked at the hand she was holding before bringing her other hand up to clasp his tightly. "What I am trying to say is….this isn't your fault…things DO happen for a reason…and for whatever reason, Arizona was meant to be on that plane…not you..."
"You really believe that?" he asked softly.
"I do" she smiled up at him, slowly letting the smile spread as she saw him relaxing. "Now…get out of here will ya?"
"What? You want me to ….leave?" Alex looked confused as he pulled his hands free.
"Uh hmm" Callie nodded. "I want you to leave…the bathroom Alex…I need to pee….I need to pee real bad!"
"Really bad!" Alex corrected as he winked at her and walked out, ducking slightly as a small pink plastic duck whizzed passed his head
[xx]
"Oh God" Arizona chuckled, "I…I really need to pee!"
Cristina looked at her and raised her eyebrows. "Seriously? We've been here like four nights and how many days, and that's the first time you've said anything!"
All though it was still dark Cristina saw the way Robbins dropped her head down, she heard the soft sniffle, barely heard the whispered. "I'm sorry…I…I can't…I… I don't uh…I'm fairly sure I have…have peed myself….I know I have…I just…this is the first time I have needed to….and…and…" she gave a bitter laugh…"and I can't!"
"You can't?" Yang asked as she came to sit next to her.
"I really feel I need to go" Arizona said softly, "you know…like when you get that painful pressure?"
"Uh huh"
"But…but I can't…there's…there's nothing there!" Arizona gave a small laugh and added… "I'm all peed out!"
Meredith, who was still still sitting next to Mark, looked over and smiled at her friend. "I can't pee either, if that helps! I mean…I haven't uh….for …for how long?" She looked at Cristina, who just shrugged and shook her head, "well…it seems like a long time. I guess we are all pretty dehydrated huh? The pain you feel, could be your …uhm…"
She stopped as she caught the quick shake of Yangs head…but Arizona had heard, she was a doctor to. "My kidneys…shutting down" she muttered. "Great…just…great!"
"It may not mean that!" Cristina said brightly" could just mean..you uh…you…have a uh…."
"What…a yeast infection?" Arizona gave a soft chuckle, "or maybe I'm pregnant! Yeah…that's it right? Come on" she said as she reached for Yangs hand, "we all know what it means. I'm bleeding…internally and …externally. I am dehydrated…and in…shock. Way in shock. My leg is infected…yes…I know" she gave a small grin as she saw the look her two friends shared, "so it's likely my body is going…going into sepsis. Which means folks…I'm screwed!"
"Your screwed!" came Marks soft whisper, "what about me?!"
Meredith reached again for his hand as he groaned softly. "Shhh" she whispered, "don't try to talk…here, have a sip of water then rest!"
"Rest! Ha!" Mark shook his head and gently pushed the water bottle from his lips. "Can rest when I'm dead! Save your water, don't waste it on me"
"Don't talk like that!" Meredith muttered as her eyes suddenly filled with tears and she tried again to get him to take a sip of water.
"Robbins is right…we're screwed. " he said as he again turned his head from the bottle. "You…you two have a chance…and Derek…if you can keep the infection under….under some control. But me and Blondie… " he shook his head and whispered, "we are so screwed"
Arizona nodded. "Which is funny…cos right now…for the first time since the crash…I feel …better! I mean…my leg still hurts like crazy…and…it hurts to kinda breath. But…I am so focused right now…I feel awake…alive!"
Meredith went to say something but stopped as she heard Derek groan then yell her name. "Derek!" she muttered as she clumsily scrabbled to her feet. "I'm here…hold on…I'm here" she called as she staggered over to him then dropped down beside him.
Arizona squinted in the dark but could see the two of them so clearly. "Not as dark tonight" she whispered
"There's a moon" Yang said dully, "a full moon and a clear sky"
Robbins looked up and grinned. "Oh yeah! Pretty!"
"Cold!" Yang muttered
"That to!" Robbins grin grew wider, "but still…pretty!"
"Hey!" came a voice form above them. "Is that my favourite blonde bombshell chating away down there? How ya doin' Arizona?"
"Just fine Jerry!" Arizona called out brightly. "Just fine…pretty night tonight huh?"
Cristinas eyebrows had shot up as she looked at the blonde woman sat next to her. Less than an hour ago Cristina had given up trying to keep her talking, she had been barely conscious, whimpering and twitching with the pain her body was in…calling for her wife as the nightmares over took her. And now? Now she was calling out to the pilot as if she was ready to sing around the campfire
"Moon sure is big up there!" Jerry called back, "I got a really good view up here!"
"I bet you have!" Arizona nodded as she glanced at Cristina, "he has absolutely the best seat right? Bet it's warmer than the ground huh?"
"I bet it is!" Yang muttered with a small nod
"I'm jealous Jerry!" Arizona laughed, "you got the best seat up there!"
They heard him laugh. Before he said. "Well…not so much the best seat right now…it uh…kinda stinks up here to be honest! Well….I kinda stink!"
Robbins laughed again before saying. "We don't exactly smell of roses down here either Jerry…but hey…it keeps the wolves at bay…don't think we smell …too appetising right now!"
"Wolves?" Meredith asked. "What wolves?"
"Oh c'mon Meredith!" Arizona chuckled, "you haven't been out of it that much that you haven't heard the pack of wolves turning the tail end of the plane into a fast food place!"
"The tail end of the plane?" Meredith glanced over in the dark and shook her head a fraction. The tail end of….uh…oh…Oh GOD! Lexie! Lexie is in the tail end of the plane!"
"Uh huh" Robbins said brightly, "and now I guess she is kinda in a pack of wolves to. Hah..a new Mac…we have McDreamy, McSteamy…and now McLexie…the new quarter pounder at the fast food chain! Oh…oh no…oh here we go again…Meredith is gonna cry ..poor Lexie…boo hoo…Lexie is dead….oh…boo hoo boo hoooo. Get a grip Mer…pretty soon we all will be….so suck it up and shut the frick up! Right? Cos all that crying? Seriously? Just….annoying now! I mean…seriously"
"Arizona?" Cristina whispered as she bent forward. The woman was babbling…and she was being mean…everyone knew Robbins didn't have a mean bone in her body, something was wrong. She reached up and placed her hand on the womans forehead. She was warm….despite the freezing temperature of the night air…Robbins was warm. Yang swallowed and sighed as she glanced over to Mark, startled to see his eyes open and fixed on her. "She has a fever" she whispered again, nodding back as she saw Mark acknowledge her. "She needs water"
Again Mark nodded as he raised his hand to point to the nearly empty bottle Meredith had left by his side. "Don't…waste it…on me" he sighed. "Give her…as much of a chance…as you can"
Yang reached over and picked up the bottle, resting her hand on his shoulder before moving back and trying to encourage Arizona to drink. "That's Marks!" Arizona shook her head and turned away from the bottle, "No…I…I won't…it's his. He needs it. He has to get home….Callie needs him…Sofia needs him. Mark? Mark damn you…you promised…you promised…we…we go home together…we go home to Callie…together. You…you promised!"
"Arizona!" he whispered as he tried to get her to focus on him. "Please…I'm trying…I am…but I'm not…not thirsty right now…and Callie would be …be mad at me….if I didn't get you to look after yourself. You…you don't want her….to be mad at me…do you?"
Arizona shook her head. She frowned as she looked at him. "Will she be mad at us….for leaving her alone so long?"
"Probably" he grinned back
"Then…then you better not die on me Mark Sloan…cos if she is mad…she can shout at…at both of us…I'm not taking…your share of the argument to…being…dead is no…no excuse…not to get yelled at…do you hear me…you don't get…to die just to get out of being yelled at by Callie. I'm not facing her…alone. We Face her together …ok?"
"Ok" he whispered, "now drink some water"
Yang tipped the bottle to her mouth as soon as Arizona turned back to face her. She took two small sips and sat back. Not noticing as Yang stared at the now empty water bottle before throwing it, as far as her good arm would let her, in to the darkness
