100 challenges

Prompt: 029 Happiness

Title: Approval


It was not something she liked to show. Any slight glimpse from her was a gift that was allowed only for great leaps in improvements or difficult victories. It took her some time to learn when to show it at all. When it had all started, she'd just not felt it, but as her soldiers improved, fell into line behind her, and strived for her approval, that changed. Slowly, the sorrow of her loss had been replaced by pride in her team, pleasure in their success, and eventually, one day she came to the realization. She was happy, maybe even happier then when she had been a Spartan.

She'd read over all their reports, every bit of information she could get on them. They were diverse, but every one of them was marine to the bone. She'd never realized she'd been missing it. She'd thought being a soldier would be enough, but she'd never felt a fulfilled when she was a navy soldier.

Kathleen dashed across the open field, glancing back over her shoulder. Emily passed her and the others were close on her heels. She kept her expression neutral, but inside she was overjoyed. When they'd started, the soldiers hadn't been anywhere close to being able to keep up with her; only Emily had stood a chance, and she hadn't had the endurance at the time to keep it up. Now, they were keeping pace with her, and Emily had become faster. Kathleen wondered in the back of her mind if the female marine was faster than even Kelly. She wasn't even sure if Kelly was still alive. Oddly, the thought didn't sadden her at all. The Spartans who had once been her family were like a distant memory, just friends of the past that were gone. There was pride in her new family, though. At some point the Spartans had stopped being brothers and sisters in her mind. To her, she had ten brothers and one sister, her ODSS.

They reached the end of the finish line of the dash and Kathleen nodded to Emily. There was just a slight change in the woman's stance. She stood up a bit taller, her movements were more crisp, and the slight hint of a smile tugged at her lips. Emily knew better than to show her enjoyment of the slight bit of praise. Kathleen turned to the rest of her soldiers and remained neutral to them. The approval directed at the female solder had an effect on them as well. A few shoulders slumped, but in a second they'd all stood up a bit taller and their faces had changed to looks of determination.

Kathleen didn't really understand it, but she wouldn't question it. The soldiers all wanted her approval, and she couldn't fathom why. They went against her orders from time to time, and although she'd never admit it, she sometimes approved of their choice to go against her. They only ever did it when not willing to back down from a challenge, when proving how good they were. It was hard to fault a soldier for having guts, not that she couldn't still chew them out for it later.

Not that they weren't ever causal with her. It had taken time, but she'd learned to relax around her soldiers. When she did, she saw who they really were. They weren't fighting for approval, just normal soldiers who were getting closer and closer by the day. Each battle seemed to strengthen their bond. She found it interesting how different they could be outside of combat. Peter and Luke fought, almost constantly, yet on the field of battle they were a smooth and effective team. Emily and Edward were actually quiet most of the time, unless someone made a joke or said something that annoyed Emily. In that situation Edward always played the man that stopped the violence, contradictory to his style of suggesting even more violence in the field. Despite the rivalry in training and in the field Tobias and Tym proved to be close friends. Matthew had proven to be very vocal in his opinions, even disagreeing with Kathleen on situations, while on the field he'd always been one of the few soldiers that followed orders. She'd also found through observation exactly how close that some of her soldiers were to each other. They'd never made an attempt to hide it, and she'd never shown disapproval.

Pretty soon, she found herself being a bit more open with them as well during those casual times. She'd joked with them, teased her soldiers, talked about their recent missions, and even voiced her disdain for ONI and the high command.

She called an end to training and reminded her soldiers that the fields would be in use, along with the gym. They often did after-training training, some part of that whole wanting-her-approval thing she didn't get. They made their way to the locker room and the marines got to work changing out of their gear. Kathleen hung back, watching her soldiers. Like a switch, they seemed to turn from the determined, stiff soldiers they were during training to the relaxed, open soldiers they were off the field.

Kathleen smiled to herself. This was her family now, and she was happy here, with them. Peter walked over to her and raised an eyebrow. "What are you smiling about, ma'am?"

Kathleen let the smile fall from her face. "Just thinking about how I kicked all your butts in training today. At this rate you'll never catch up." Peter looked dejected, but not as much as she used to expect. At some point several of her soldiers had come to par with her skills, or surpassed them, in some fields. Peter knew he couldn't run as fast, or beat her in hand-to-hand, but he'd shown in training that he was a better sniper than her.

"You won't beat us next time." Kathleen turned to the voice, to see Max, who was grinning like an idiot. In this situation, he sort of was one. He was skilled as a medic, but he couldn't come ahead in any offensive training. Though she had to give him credit, he had guts for making the proclamation when he didn't have any offensive skill.

"Ha." The laugh was mocking. "In your dreams." The determined look flashed over the face of her soldiers. Kathleen kept the smile from her face this time. Yes, she was happy, but she wouldn't let them see it.