Disclaimer: I am not J.K. Rowling or George Lucas.

Enter Luke.

Enter Ooryl Qrygg and Canderous Ordo, both Moricho-ed.

Enter the arachnes, scurrying away from the limp bodies.

Luke bends down.

Luke. Ooryl. Canderous.

Enter Bogan.

Bogan. Why, it's young Skywalker. What's Skywalker up to? Why's Skywalker lurking . . . ?

Bogan stops mid-somersault, seeing Ooryl and Canderous.

Attack! Attack! Another attack! No mortal or ghost is safe! Run for your lives! Attack!

Enter Mon Mothma, leading several Masters and students into the scene.

Enter Corran Horn.

Corran. Caught in the act!

Mothma. That will do, Horn.

Mothma and the other Masters bend down to examine Ooryl and Canderous.

Bogan. [singing] O! Skywalker, you rodder. O! What have you done? You're killing off students. You think it's good fun . . .

Mothma. That's enough, Bogan.

Exit Bogan.

Sio Bibble and Tionne Solusar, the silver-haired Master of Astronomy, carry Ooryl to the medcenter.

Corran fans Canderous towards the medcenter.

Luke. Senator. I swear I didn't . . .

Mothma. This is out of my hands, Skywalker.

Exit all but Luke and Mothma.

Luke and Mon Mothma approach a stone gargoyle.

Choclime twist.

The gargoyle springs to life and admits them into Yoda's quarters.

Master Yoda will be waiting for you.

Exit Mothma.

Luke steps onto the gargoyle, which moves like a turbolift.

Luke arrives at Yoda's door and walks in.

Luke sees that Yoda's quarters are filled with silver Force-sensitive artifacts and holographs of every previous Grand Master: Darth Revan, Exar Kun, Meetra Surik, Bastila Shan, Fae Coven, Thrackan Sal-Solo, Genarra, Cilghal, Ronhar Kim, and Saba Sebatyne.

Enter Revan's Mask.

Luke picks up the helmet and places it over his head.

Mask. Gort in your bonnet, Skywalker?

Luke. Er, yes. I was just . . . wondering whether you put me in the right House.

Mask. Yes. You were particularly difficult to place. But I stand by what I said last season. You would have done well in Kun.

Luke. You're wrong.

Revan's Mask falls silent.

Enter Vergere, a sickly-looking Fosh with red and blue feathers.

[aside] That's all I need, for Yoda's bird to die while I'm alone in the room with it.

Vergere bursts into flames and dies.

Enter Yoda.

Yoda. Luke.

Luke. Master. Your avian. There was nothing I could do. It just caught fire.

Yoda. About time, too. She's been looking dreadful for days. I've been telling her to get a move on.

Yoda chuckles at Luke's stunned face.

Vergere is a Fosh, Luke. They burst into flames when it is time for them to die, and then they are reborn from the ashes.

An infant Vergere resurfaces from the ashes.

Pity you had to see her on a Burning Day. She's really very beautiful most of the time, wonderful red and blue plumage. Fascinating creatures, Fosh. They can carry immensely heavy loads, their tears have healing powers, and they make highly faithful pets.

Enter Chewbacca, his blue eyes blazing, the dead avian still in his hand.

Chewbacca. It wasn't Luke, Master Yoda. I was talking to him seconds before that kid was found. He never had time, sir.

Yoda. Chewbacca . . .

Chewbacca. It can't have been him. I'm prepared to swear it in front of the Republic Senate.

Yoda. Chewbacca, I . . .

Chewbacca. You've got the wrong boy, sir. I know Luke never . . .

Yoda. Chewbacca! I do not believe that Luke has attacked anyone.

Chewbacca. Well, of course you don't. O! Right. I'll just wait outside, then.

Exit Chewbacca.

Luke. You don't think it was me, Master?

Yoda. No, Luke. I do not think it was you. But I must ask you, is there anything you wish to tell me?

Luke. [hesitates] No, Master. Nothing.

Yoda. Very well, then. Off you go.

Exit all.