Reader: Holy Shit Pav did you just post another chapter of AIR?
Pavarti: Why yes darling readers I did!
Reader: I was beginning to give up hope...I thought perhaps you no longer loved us.
Pavarti: No no my darlings, never think that! I've promised you before there is more to this story, this is NOT THE END.
Reader: But what's taken you so long!
Pavarti: Real life boringness got it's claws into me and I've been working on another story some so my attention's been split, but never, ever did I stop loving you.
Reader: I'm so glad to hear that, please, don't leave us for so long again.
Pavarti: I'll try not to, I promise, no please, read, enjoy and review!
The old woman stood behind me as I appraised my appearance in the mirror. She had pulled my hair back and plaited it in the traditional Quileute fashion. Two braids straight down the back. She had added extensions and feathers into the weave making the result much more dramatic than I had expected.
Kim and Emily sat on the wooden floor around the traditional basket they had made for me, making final adjustments and corrections to it. The basket was colorful and large, hand-dyed and woven by my Sisters.
"Sweet bird." The old woman placed a hand on my shoulder staring at my reflection in the mirror. The lights were dim and the mid-spring evening air danced around us.
"Are you certain?" Her eyes were dark and unfathomable, but my vision was sharper than a human's and I could see in her reflection the goodness of her golden spirit. Her worry tinged everything she touched with darkness, as did her loneliness.
The woman had chosen a path that had forever been banned from men within the tribe. She was the medicine woman, the priestess, that holder of secrets; and now she was passing that role on to Leah. Strong and wise Leah had stopped phasing and was channeling her inner magic toward learning the ancient ways of her people.
"I have no doubts in my Sister." I stepped out of the long bathrobe I had been wearing and lay down on my stomach. My upper body completely nude against the ceremonial sheet that had been laid on the floor.
The old woman sat at my head, her legs crossed and her back hunched forward so that she could reach my shoulders. With one hand on each side of me, I felt her touch vibrate through me.
I could sense when Leah entered the room. The cool air flowed in with her drifting across my skin, but the connection I shared with my Spirit Sister so strong I would have known it was her if I was deaf and blind. Her steps were sure as she approached and sat down next to me. Soon Kim and Emily joined them and sat on the other side of my body.
"This ceremony hasn't been performed for over 100 years," the old woman began with her deep voice.
"This ceremony holds the deepest secrets of our people," Leah continued.
They spoke sometimes in unison, sometimes over each other and sometimes separately, until the tone of their voice no longer mattered and the words they spoke were truth ingrained in the souls of all of us who heard them.
"The Quileute people are tied to the Moon and the Sun. The Quileute people are lead by the Wolf and loved by the Thunderbird. The Quileute people have existed since Q'wati gave us life and will endure until time ends."
Their chant changed to Quileute and flowed beautifully like music. As I listened I felt the Thunderbird dance within me, recognizing her place in history and mythos. She took pride in her role and was exciting for this final act to consecrate she and I as one, and then us as Jake's.
I did not notice when Leah pierced my skin the first time, my mind was lost along the rhythm of their words. My blood mixed with ink again and again and I was unaware of the time passing. A small totem was being place on each of the scars that had been branded on my back. Symbols of the Quileute history, my brother and sister spirits. The Wolf, the Bear, the Raven, the Ogress. They were all connected to me and to our people. As she worked I fell deeper and deeper into peace.
As Leah finished, Kim and Emily cleaned me up, continuing to monotone the chant that had lifted my spirit out of my body and allowed it to connect deeper to the world within and outside of the one we see.
"Now little bird, you straddle life and death, spirit and human, white and red. Now you are ready."
I sat up with tears in my eyes and embraced the old woman whose real name I had never known. "Thank you, Mother," I said kissing her on the cheek.
"Q'wakili," I said turning to Leah, knowing now that it was not a name but a title. "There is one more thing. Please..." I touched the lines on my face. "Fill this in. It is my mark to Qwoli, but as it is, all that shows is Dask'iya."
Slowly Leah's face broke into the kind smile that was so rarely seen, and she reached yet again for her needle and ink.
Soon night had descended around the wooden cabin that would become Paul and Leah's home now that the old woman had passed the mantle to the next generation. I could smell fire in the air and knew that the bonfire was roaring by now. The old woman and Leah had blessed me and marked the beginning of the wedding ceremony that would last late into the night.
Kim and Emily helped me dress in the backless white dress my mother had worn when she married my father so many years ago. My traditional hair and tribal tattoos contrasting against it, making them the true focus of my attire. Somehow everything came together. The black and red of the tattoos on my back, wrist, and face shined against the paleness of my skin and the gleaming white of the dress. The two braids fell down my shoulders like book-ends to the totems on my back.
"Bella, you're exquisite," Kim sighed as she looked at me.
Smiling I pulled her into a hug. Now that the ceremony had officially begun, I wasn't allowed to speak but my intentions were clear as my eyes shone with tears.
"Now don't you cry," Emily scolded. "If you cry, I'll cry and then what good was all this makeup?"
I smiled at Emily's kind and make-up free face. She wore her hair back in traditional braids along with Kim and Leah. They wore short yellow sun dresses demarking them as my bridesmaids, but Leah also wore a series of thick necklaces that told the tribe of her official position.
Outside the drum beat began, noting the beginning of the procession that was to be led by me.
Closing my eyes I took one last look inside of myself and found that I had no hesitation, no regrets, and no fear about marrying the man, the wolf, the chief, the boy who was Jacob Black. The Thunderbird swelled with joy and wrapped her soft wings around my heart.
With glowing yellow eyes I stepped out into the night to greet my future.
It had been two months since Jake had awoken from his coma-dream. During that time I had moved out to La Push and was living with Sam and Emily. While my father was still insistent that Jake and I not live together until we were wed, he did not fight the fact that I needed to be closer to the pack. Charlie had seen too much magic to pretend that there weren't forces in the universe directing my fate.
Dr. Cullen and my father had convinced Forks High School that I was better but greatly weakened, and so I was allowed to do most of my work from home and come to school only two days a week for tests and assignments. Lauren was the only one who doubted the authenticity of my story, but Angela, knowing nothing but suspecting something extraordinary, always silenced her gossip-mongering quickly.
I cared less and less about what was said about me when I wasn't around but I did not want to lose the friends I had; Angela, Ben, Eric, Mike...even Jessica were important to me and important to my connection to a normal human life. Graduation was in three weeks, but that moment seemed insignificant in comparison to the passage into adulthood I was about to take.
We walked slowly across the rocky driveway until we met the entrance to the path in the woods that would lead us to the beach. My steps were sure, and the sharp rocks did not cause my bare feet any pain. I was too elated to worry about anything tonight.
The stars above us were bright and seemed to be pulsing with the beat of the drums; witness to my union with Jake. The cosmos itself celebrated as two of their own, Qwoli and T'ist'ilal defied the Great Spirit. Or perhaps they had finally overcome the obstacles the Great Spirit had put into their path so that they could finally, truly be one.
All of the obstacles of the past year swirled around me as I walked with my Sisters: Imprinting, mating, James, Victoria, Jake's vision quest, Edward, my father, our own fears... So many things had aligned to keep us apart but in the end, this love was an epic story. It was something that could not be stopped. Neither life nor death would ever separate us again.
Stepping out of the forest and onto the beach, I was struck by the smell of the wind off the sea. The clean salt water infused air invigorated me. The fire was off to the right, behind the rows of people who had come to witness this union. Tonight we were returning to the old ways. There was no council and there was no America. Tonight, the Cheif's son was marrying his intended bride and taking his role as leader of his people. The entire Quileute tribe was here, as well as my mother and father, my friends from school, and as a final show of his commitment to be my friend, Edward Cullen.
Despite the agreement that the Cullens would not be permitted on Tribe land, this one night a single vampire had crossed the boundary line to witness the woman he loved marry another.
As I walked toward the crowd, Kim and Emily fell behind Leah and myself. Behind them were the drummers who had announced to the people and the Spirits that tonight there would be a merging of two great souls.
Behind the back row my father stood waiting for me, dressed in jeans and a pressed button up shirt. Weddings on the beach were deemed to not require my father suffer in a tuxedo, this is kind of awkward - can you rephrase? Despite my mother's insistence that Phil wear one. Out here in the night, surrounded by the glowing light of the fire, Charlie beamed proudly at me as I approached and he was as handsome as I could ever imagine.
When we reached him he smiled and kissed my cheek, directly atop the tattoo. We waited while Leah walked confidently to the fire with Kim and Emily trailing behind her. When they reached the front, Angela stood up in a matching yellow dress to join them, not having been allowed at the pre-wedding ceremony. As always, though, Angela accepted that with maturity and grace that would put anyone else in her position to shame.
Everyone was sitting in the sand, beach chairs, standing or on logs that had been pulled into place earlier. The children were dancing to the drum beats around the fire and off in the dunes; their youthful glee embraced and enjoyed as part of the night instead of stifled.
"Quillayute tsidá - t'łòx'ádas! Hók'at' Friends! Welcome! Haćháł xaxíktiya!"
(Quileutes young and old! Outsider Friends! Welcome! Good things today!)
Leah raised her hands above her head as she spoke and a cheer rose from the Quileutes in attendance. The crowd stood and began clapping and stamping in rhythm to the drumming which had increased it's tempo. The few white faces in attendance seemed overwhelmed and confused, but soon they too joined in with the exuberance of the wedding processional.
No solemn Ode To Joy for me. Nope, that wouldn't have been fitting. Today was a celebration: jeans and drums, dancing and stomping, smiling until it hurt. This was the best wedding I'd ever attended.
As the drums came to a fevered pitch, Jacob stood from the fallen log he had been sitting on at the front. Bare chested and wearing loose fitting pants he was a God, literally and metaphorically; the Spirit of Qwoli was merged completely with him and his eyes shone as bright and brilliant as the fire behind him. Outlined by the heat and intesity of the flames he was larger than life, and the thick cords of necklaces around his neck announced his place as Chief.
"K'ò?o łibíti?" Leah bellowed over the din. (Where are the strong?)
"Quillayute!" The crowd responded
"K'ò?o haćh?" She called again (Where are the good?)
"Quillayute!" The crowd responded
"K'ò?o wisá?" She called again (Where are the happy?)
"Quillayute!" The crowd responded
"Ayásocha?" (How is that?)
"Quillayute Q'wati!" (Q'wati blesses his people!)
"Ayásocha?" (How is that?)
"Quillayute Qwoli!" (Qwoli protects his people!)
"Ayásocha?" (How is that?)
"Qwoli T'ist'ilal!" (Qwoli is strengthened by T'ist'ilal!)
The drums were silent now as Leah lowered her hands and all attention was focused on Charlie and I. For once the feeling of eyes on me did not fill me with dread or nausea. Instead I stood taller, proud to be a part of these great people, proud to be called one of their own.
The mist blew in from the water as the spirits joined us. The twinkling stars winked down at me with joy.
Walking slowly, Charlie and I passed friends, family, and strangers. People cried and smiled as I walked past, but when I was in front of them gasps could be heard throughout the crowd. My tattoos impressing the people with the deeper meaning of this union. Even those who did not know about the wolves or my Thunderbird could not mistake the totems on my back or their ancient meaning.
My mother hissed in a breath when I passed her, her tears stopping as she took in the markings on my body. She was not in favor of this union, had been deeply upset by the tattoo on my face and wrist and furious with my father for allowing any of this to happen. My coming here was supposed to be a good thing, but as far as she could see it had ruined my life.
As I approached Jake, the pack stood up around him, similarly dressed with thinner, less impressive necklaces. The sight of them all together, backlit by the impressively large fire, was magestic.
My father stopped and kissed my cheek before turning and starting back down the aisle, but Billy reached out and caught his hand, pulling him to sit at the front of the crowd with the Tribal Council members. My father's place in this world was still unsure, but he was respected and loved and I was glad to see him pulled into the inner circle.
Jake reached out to me, and as our fingers met, the fire blazed hotter to match our passion. His eyes turned a brilliant white as he gazed at me and mine shone back at him. On his left shoulder and pectoral muscle was an intricate tattoo of the Thunderbird, weaving around his neck and upper back. My beautiful Spirit was etched forever in his flesh.
The sound of howls burst through the silence as the pack raised their heads in celebration. The magic of the night pulling us all closer to our spirit selves.
Leah's voice broke the spell as she called out above the din.
"Quillayutes! Family! Friends!" The crowd quieted down and the drums began again with a softer, slower temple that brought Leah's voice into focus.
"You who have joined us here are a village, you will always be friends. Tied together through this union and through our communal love, Jacob and Bella will be wed today."
The pack hooted again, inspiring another round of cheering to break through the crowd. The drums directed the sound by slowing and softening until it was again silent, pausing to allow Leah to begin again.
"They need our support and encouragement as they discover the commitment and dedication needed to make marriage work. That is why you are here today, and they hope you will be here every day to share from your wisdom, to share what you learned from your relationships and your life.
"Now in honor of Q'wati we'll pray to the Great Spirit:
Great Spirit please protect the ones we love
We honor all you created as we pledge our hearts and lives togetherWe honor mother Earth and ask that this marriage grow stronger through the seasons;
We honor fire and ask that this union be warm and glowing with love in our hearts;
We honor wind and ask that we sail through life safe and calm as in our father's arms;
We honor water to clean and soothe our relationships that they may never thirst for love;
with all the forces of the universe you have created, we pray for harmony and true happiness as we forever grow young together.
Father Sky is the roof above us, protecting us from the unknown beyond
Mother Earth at your feet to hold you up, supporting you and loving you with her body
The trees and plants to your left embrace you and connect you with all living things
The sea at your right moves like the tide of life, always changing, always unknown
You have both been marked in the ancient ways of our tribe, declaring your love for one another and commitment to our people. As you have chosen to be married in the traditional way we will dispense with rings and other trappings of the White Man's culture. In the minds and hearts of the Quillayute People, you are wed, Sun and Moon embodied, your are a universe unto yourselves, may your goodness and light forever guide our tribe!"
The drums intensified as Jake took me into his arms, tears in his white eyes, and kissed me. The shock of his body touching mine after just one day apart jolted through my body like a lightning bolt crashing into us. It air around me vibrated and sang to the beat of the drums as his soft lips danced with mine.
"T'ist'ilal," Jake whispered as he gazed down at me with his deep brown eyes.
"My love," I smiled back before kissing him again softly.
Around us Kim, Emily, and Leah joined their mates and Angela went to hug Embry. She and Ben had amicably stopped dating and she was spending more and more time with the pack. Soon I hoped they would imprint; it would be such a joy to welcome her into my family.
Around us the crowd was dancing to the beat of the drums around the fire, the rows of seats pulled out of the way so that the women could begin setting up the feast. A long table had been placed near the dunes and was piled with gifts and food. At one end was the basket that my Sisters had made and was being filled with money, checks, jewelry and other trinkets of good luck for our new life.
"May I see?" Jake asked excitedly when we had stopped kissing, motioning for me to turn away from him. As I spun I came face to face with Edward. Jake's hands laid firmly on my hips and pulled me suddenly back against his chest with a growl.
"Bella, Jacob, congratulations. Again, I'm honored that you allowed me to be here." Edward bowed his head slightly in the elegant way he did while keeping his amber eyes trained on mine.
"Thank you, Edward. We're glad you came," I said stepping away from Jake and pulled Edward into an awkward hug.
Stepping back I smiled up at him, my heart so full of love I was oblivious of the pain on his face. I had no desire to hurt him, and at the time I had no idea about the issues he was struggling with, although soon, those issues would become the center of my universe.
"It was nice to see you," Jacob said, more kindly than I'd expected, while reaching out a hand to Edward.
"I...thank you Jacob. I hope we can continue this more amicable relationship in the future." Edward's frozen hand grasped Jake's in a quick shake.
"Alright then," Jake replied with a smile.
"I am going to leave you to your celebration. Please, enjoy the night and call me when you return from your honeymoon."
"I will Edward. Goodnight." I smiled and watched his retreating figure for a moment as he walked, hands deep in his pockets, shoulders slumped forward in his characteristic way.
Half of my heart was walking away from me, but as I turned back to Jake in the warm light of the fire, the skin of my tattoos tingling with love thanks to his mere presence, I knew that I had made the single best decision of my life.
Soon we were surrounded by hugging, squealing neighbors, friends, and family. I was spinning from all of the attention and smiling. My face felt strained and sore but no matter how I tried I couldn't contain the joy that beamed from my face. I was in love. I was in love and married and mated and happy. I was exactly where I wanted to be and I never, ever intended to be anywhere else.
Jake had been swept away in a sea of people and was dancing with some cousins I had never met. His body moved to the rhythm of the drums like water moves across the shore, smooth and graceful, powerfully flowing around those around him. He was a force of nature and finally, completely he was mine. The Thunderbird inside of me begged to go to him, to touch him and never be apart.
As I began moving toward him, feeling the string that connected us pulling on my soul, I took in the faces of those around me. Tonight was not just a wedding, it was a celebration. We had planned this our way using what traditional rituals we liked and those Leah had insisted upon and included more modern ones like wearing my mother's dress. Tonight was ours completely and our happiness showed in everything we did.
The guests were touched tonight by the magic in the air, and I could see Pale Faces and Quileutes dancing together, switching with ease between traditional steps and disco. Mike Newton was leading a strange drum guided version of the Electric Slide down closer to the water, and the smell of the food people had brought to share was beginning to fill the air.
"Bella!" My mother's voice broke through my thoughts.
"Mom!" I cried walking over to her as quickly. Her eyes stopped me from touching her though, the cold disapproval felt like a swat from a wet towel.
"I guess there's no sense in trying to preserve that dress after tonight," she sighed looking down at the dirt and sand stains on the hem.
"Ummm, I hadn't thought about it," I admitted wiggling my toes in the sand.
"It makes sense not to wear shoes on the beach, I guess I just didn't consider that when I agreed to let you wear it." Her eyes remained locked on the dress, never on my face.
"Bella Girl!" Phil cried as he approached, arms open wide, a beer in his left hand.
"Hi Phil!" I smiled as he lifted me in the air and tried to swing me around, but he lost his footing in the sand and got tangled in the train of my dress, sending us both flying towards the ground. We laughed as we tried to extricate ourselves and stand up.
"It's good to see you," I beamed. I'd always liked Phil, even if I wasn't sold on him and Renee as a couple; he was a good guy and had always been nice to me.
"You are a beautiful bride, you know that Bella Girl?" Wrapping an arm around me, he turned to my mother. "You have a beautiful daughter Renee, not surprising considering how gorgeous you are though."
"Phil, are you out of your mind? You're drinking already? You tackled my daughter on her wedding day?"
"Renee..."
"Mom..."
"No, it's...it's fine...you got the wedding you wanted Bella, I guess you always were determined to do things your way." And with that she turned and walked toward where people were beginning to line up for food.
"Don't mind her" Phil apologized. "It's hard on her to see you growing up, and it's hard on her to be back here in Washington, too. Don't get upset, okay?" He kissed me on the forehead and leaned down to look into my eyes.
"Are you happy Bella Girl? Does this Jake make you happy?" Suddenly serious, I could see that Phil was completely sober, just exuberant and feeling the effects of the energy in the night.
"Yes, Phil! He's...he's everything to me," I confided.
"And you're okay, living here in Forks or on this little beach for the rest of your life?"
"Yeah, I am."
"Then that's good enough for me. I hope to get to know him better while we're here, and maybe you'll come visit us in Jackson sometime." He straightened up and smiled down at me before sending a sideways glance at my mother, standing there in her flowing blue sundress with her arms crossed and a frown on her face.
"Maybe sometime," I smiled sadly, knowing that that wasn't likely to be anytime soon.
The drumming soon stopped and everyone was eating and talking excitedly about graduation and this year's La Push Day festival and generally catching up. I hadn't had a chance to catch my breath with so many people coming up to me and talking, so when Jake came up behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist, I inhaled deeply and leaned back into him, allowing his strength and warmth to support me.
"How's my bride?" he whispered into my hair as he kissed my head.
"Tired, blissfull, overwhelmed, exciting, amazing!" I turned in his arms so that I could look up at the man I loved.
"How about hungry?" He smiled down at me with adoration.
"That too."
"Come on, let's get some of Quil's mom's baked ziti before it's all gone." Taking my hand, Jake led me to the front of the line and cut in front of everyone who was waiting. Instead of protesting they all smiled happily at our intrusion.
"Keep up your strength Jake, you have a big night!" One of the men called out.
"Whoot! Whoot!" Calls went up and soon howls joined them making me laugh.
"Sure, sure," Jake blushed as he scooped some grilled vegetables onto his plate.
After gathering enough food for a little league team, Jake led me over to sit at one of the tables that had been set up.
"No, come on, let's go sit by the fire," I smiled and walked quickly toward the glowing pit.
"Your dress though..." Jake began.
"Sheesh! You and my mom should talk more!" I muttered before sitting in the sand.
"Ok, well, if you don't care I sure don't." He settled beside me and began eating. Quil and Embry soon joined us and brought some beer for everyone who was by the fire.
"So, big plans tonight?" Quil began.
"I'm so not telling you a fucking thing," Jake laughed before throwing a hamburger at his brother who caught it easily and stuffed it in his mouth.
We settled comfortably into pack banter that could have happened at anytime, anywhere. It seemed I had been wrong all my life and getting married didn't really have to change anything, as long as you married the right man.
Angela came over with her food and sat next to Embry, who leaned back to put his arm around her. I smiled at him knowingly, making him blush and look away.
"Hey Bella, did you see your dad down by the water?" She motioned with her head toward where Charlie was dancing in the moonlight with Amber, the waitress from the diner.
"Oh my God! Charlie's going to score!" Jared hooted with joy.
"Not if you keep on like that!" Kim swatted him in the arm and smiled at her mate with love.
"Dude your dad's got the hottest grown-up in town on his arm. I sure hope he gets some." Erik laughed as he joined us. Soon everyone between the ages of 14 and 24 was sitting around us, laughing and joking like it was any other bonfire, except the entire pack was topless - no, wait - that would happen at any other bonfire, too.
Soon everyone was finished eating and the older crowd was coming to join us again near the fire. It was getting late and the night was black above us; you could barely see past the circle of light that the fire put out, and the sky shimmered with stars above us.
The night was alive, it was an attendee at the celebration of my wedding with Jake. Everyone, the humans, the wolves, the spirits, the darkness, the gods, everyone was smiling with me...except my mother.
"HoWah! HoWah!" People began to chant as Billy was brought to the front of the crowd next to the fire. Soon everyone in attendance was pulled in close around him.
"It is our tradition that people be able to say something to the couple before they leave to begin their new lives. Now, they may not be ready to go yet, but I'm getting pretty damn tired out here!" Laughter flowed around me, filling my heart with warmth and love.
"So, to get things started I just want to say that my son...he has grown up to be a man. He has grown up to be the great man his mother always saw in him, and that honors his father and the memory of his grandfather and great-grandfather, all the way back to the first Quileutes. He holds, the spirit of our people within him and it is to that Spirit I speak now: 'Haḉhikída ?axw híxat tsáda kasákłxlich': If you do the right thing, you will always be proud."
Billy bowed his head and the silence that followed was reverent and calm. His words had layers of meaning that spoke to the very core of Jacob's Qwoli soul.
Charlie came to stand behind Billy and placed a hand on his old friend's shoulder.
"Well, if you're only going to talk about your boy, I guess it's my job to say something about that daughter of mine." Charlie's smile sought me out and threatened to break free of his face.
Charlie took a quick drink of his beer before wiping his mouth on the back of his hand. "Ahh, okay, well, I'm not so good at all this talking stuff. That's what Renee, Bella's mom was always good at. Me, I'm usually the one sitting in the back row, listening to the game with one earphone hoping no one notices.
"But tonight, well, my baby girl is growing up. This whole year has been a year of growing up and changing, for both of us I guess, and I just want to say that Isabella, you are an amazing person and I'm proud to know you, prouder still to call you my own.
"It's hard to see you as a woman now, but you've made a home here for yourself with good people and Jake loves you something fierce. So while it's a sad day to have to let you go, next to the day you were born, it's the best day of my life to see you so happy."
Charlie coughed into his hand and sniffed softly, trying to conceal the emotion he couldn't help but feel. "Finally, to quote the great Colonel Potter from M*A*S*H: 'Having babies is fun, but babies grow up into people.'"
As people began laughing Quil shot up, hands above his head. A tall and impressive figure in his own right he commanded that people listen when he spoke.
"There once was a boy from La Push!" He began, making Jake and I throw sand at him while the crowd groaned.
"And Bella thought he had a great tush!" Embry added, jumping up to join his brother.
"But who could have told..." Quil put one arm around Embry and held the other out to the side dramatically.
"That she's the one who would hold..." Embry mirrored his actions.
"Us all together when he turned to MUSH!" They chanted together before hugging each other tightly and falling into a fit of laughter making everyone bubble over with giggles and cat calls.
"All right, well I think this is the perfect moment to present the ceremonial chocolate!" Sue Clearwater called from the back of the crowd near the buffet table, which had been cleared of all of the dinner food and set up with something I couldn't quite see.
"Jake and Bella, come on back here!" She motioned to us with her arms, a huge smile playing on her face. Billy and Harry were chuckling behind us making me suspicious about what they had done.
"Now, even though you didn't exchange rings and you didn't want Champagne or a big cake, your mothers couldn't resist doing something special for you. So, Donna Atera, Qiana Uley, Jenny Meraz, Linda Call and I all got together and come up with these."
"So they're her mothers now, too?" I heard my mother grumble from where she sat, up on a bench next to Phil.
Jake snaked an arm around me and pulled me close to his side as Sue and Qiana handed us each a cupcake. On top of mine was a cut out from dark blue rolled fondant of a wolf and on Jake's was a Pink Cut out of a bird.
"Perfect!" I squealed, pulling Sue into a huge hug and laughing into her hair.
"Now don't get it on my nice clothes girl!" she scolded, despite wearing a flannel shirt and jeans, the only attire I'd ever seen her in.
"Come on, now are you going to feed each other the cake?" Mike Newton called out from the sand where Jessica was happily sitting in his lap.
"Oh, God..." I said looking over at Jake who had a mischiveous look in his eye.
"Don't do it Jake! It's not worth ruining the honeymoon over!" someone called out.
Jake and I locked eyes, smiling the biggest, toothiest grins we were capable of, and simultaneously hurled our cupcakes at each other. We were both too fast though and while mine landed in the sand behind me, Jake's landed in Emily's hair.
"Jacob!" she screamed before running after him, cupcake in hand. He weaved through the laughing crowd with her close on his heels.
Laughing, I grabbed another cupcake and began to peel it as I watched the chaos before me. People came up to the table for a cupcake and perhaps another drink while I walked out toward the water.
Standing outside the ring of warmth the fire and the pack had held me in it was a chilly evening. The water beat against the rocks as I held my arms around myself and breathed in the crisp clean air. I could hear the laughter behind me and Emily's squeals as Jacob turned on her and began chasing her further down the beach.
Out in the distance the black sea merged with the black sky, their union so complete it was impossible to tell where one ended and the other began. That was how I felt about my Thunderbird. She smiled within me and I could feel her joy in being so loved and accepted by me.
"Bella? Bella baby, I'm going to go..." I turned to see Renee standing behind me, too close to ignore, but to far to reach out and touch.
"Okay, mom." I took a step closer to her but she remained still.
"I guess this is it, this is your life now."
"Yes, it is."
"I'd hoped you'd go to college or into the Peace Corps or something. You know, do something more with your youth than I did with mine."
"Mom...I'm...I'm not you."
"No, I guess you aren't," she sighed looking out into the water, her mind and heart a million miles away.
"I'd like for you to get to know Jake and everyone else. Do you have to fly out tomorrow?" I asked, hoping that for once she might choose me over her own life.
"Phil has practice on Monday and I start my acupuncture classes on Thursday. I need to get everything ready for that." She shook her head, dismissing my need for her as quickly as swatting a fly.
"Oh...okay..." I dug my toes deeper into the sand, feeling the moisture beneath the surface. We stood there in silence each wishing the other could be a little bit different than we were.
"Bella! Where are you?" Kim called out into the night, pulling my attention back to the life I had chosen and the family who loved me.
"Here Kim!" I waved up at her silhouette and felt the pull of my Sisters, my Pack, my Mate. "Mom, I...I've got to go..." I looked back at her one last time before walking up the beach and back home.
"Good night Bella...Be Happy..." I heard my mother call in goodbye before walking back to the real world she lived in, where monsters and vampires did not exist, where tattoos were something that set you apart instead of marked that you belonged.
Back at the fire I could see that most everyone had left and now it was just the Pack and Angela who was wrapped up in Embry's arms. Silently Jake walked up to me and took my hand.
"Come on, I have a surprise for you..." he kissed my lips lightly before pulling me off in the direction of the rocky cliffs.
"Should we say goodbye?" I asked just as their howls filled the night around us.
