Okay, guys and gals, we're back with a new chapter, and we're getting into the action! Last time, Blood Moon spirits crashed Shen's extremely boring party, which may or may not have been a good thing, depending on who you asked (Helios). After Helios saves the day using references, he's gonna head to the Placidium, where he'll meet up with Karma, Raka (just another average reader, I know you're looking forward to that part especially), and discover the central antagonist of the Ionia arc! Now, without further ado, read on.


I awkwardly glanced from side to side, sweat forming on my brow. Blood Fate remained motionless, either enjoying the view or contemplating ways to kill me. Even if it was slightly creepy, I preferred the former. You know you're hot when people of the same gender are gay for you. And hey, I was a star for most of my life, so it shouldn't be too hard. Uh...not that I'd try.

"Are you just going to keep standing there, or..." I trailed off.

Blood Fate tilted his head to one side, almost as if he was curious. Then, he looked back at the other four knock-offs, who weren't exactly my favorite people. Well, except for one.

Blood Jhin was perched on the roof of the Kinkou monastery, his rifle trained on me.

Blood Talon emerged from the shadows near the gate, wrist-blade extended while his one visible eye leerd at me. And I actually liked Talon, too. What a shame.

But when I saw the third Blood Spirit...I felt my blood begin to boil.

Blood Diana climbed over the gates, bearing a crimson Crescent Blade in one hand. She actually looked reasonably human, compared to the other three. The only thing that showed she was a demon spirit was the oni mask that concealed her face. I was so calling dibs.

And then, Blood Fate spoke.

"Thisss one sssmellsss...different." It noted. I had no doubt that it was an it. Its voice was a shrill rasp, creating goosebumps up and down my spine in response. Welp, so much for homosexuality. "Thisss one sssmellsss...deliciousss." Okay, was he attracted to me or not? I was very confused. "Itsss sssoul would be...exquisssite."

Oh. That explains it.

"We are forbidden." Blood Talon said. "The missstresss hasss laid claim to it. To defy her isss heresssy."

"The mistress merely instructed us to bring him before her." Blood Diana contradicted. Its voice was a little more bearable, but the fact that it looked like Diana made it worse. "We may play with him if we wish."

"I'm standing right here, you know." I said. "I'd rather not be treated like an appetizer, thank you very much."

"You are unwelcome here." Shen stood firm, blade at the ready. "Leave, or face the consequences."

Blood Fate laughed. "And thisss one hasss a mouth." It drifted towards Shen, red smoke trailing in its wake. "What doesss the missstresss sssay about thisss one?"

"She cares not." Blood Diana replied.

"Then itsss tongue will be a sssufficient trophy." It concluded, tracing a claw along the Eye of Twilight's jawline. Shen didn't flinch, locking eyes with the spirit.

"I take that's a no?" Shen asked nonchalantly.

"Ssso bold." Blood Fate remarked, claws beginning to cut through the fabric of Shen's mask. "Prehapsss I ssshould presssent your head asss a gift to the miss-"

Shen's spirit blade made a clean cut across its midsection, resulting in a bloodcurdling shriek. Blood Fate stumbled backwards, black mist hissing as it exited the wound. "Leave." Shen repeated. "I won't ask a second time."

It snarled, bloodred playing cards flickering into existence between its clawed fingers. "You dare to ssstrike the ssservants of our missstresss?!" It said. "Your life isss forfeit."

"Why don't you start counting first?" Shen asked. "Take a look around you. How many of my pupils do you see?" Blood Fate did so, observing the armed Kinkou, enclosing the spirits in a half circle. "Our blades are more than capable of cutting you, and we outnumber you by the dozen. I suggest you take my advice and leave if you wish to survive."

Blood Fate cackled. "What makesss you believe that we are outnumbered?"

Shrill cries and ghastly screams echoed throughout the chill wind, accompanied by pillars of red mist dropping down from the sky. They coalesced into humanoid shapes as they struck the ground, albeit with claws and demon masks. Some carried weapons. Others looked like their bodies were weapons. Whatever their capabilities were, they were most certainly lethal. The most notable difference between the Blood champions and their subordinates was that the lesser spirits appeared to be made out of red mist entirely. Only their masks and weapons were completely solid.

Shen regarded the newcomers silently. "Well. This is hardly fair." Shen said. "You only brought a few dozen."

The Eye of Twilight dashed forward in a haze of shadow. Blood Fate threw a card and flashed to its location as it met the Kinkou ninja. It teleported to its location, clashing weapons. Akali and Kennen urged their students forward, while Wukong and I prepared for a 2v2 with Blood Diana and Talon.

This. Was gonna be. Epic.


The problem with fighting Blood Champions is that they're extremely proficient at completely mimicking the abilities of their lookalikes. Blood Talon, for example, was ridiculously hard to hit, while Blood Diana's attacks just plain stung. She hadn't actually hit me yet, but her sword smelled like sulfuric acid, which was a sufficient hint. Stupid moon spirits and their frickin' moon powers...

Shen was going Pro Genji with Blood Fate, the two flickering in and out of existence all around the monastery. It was like watching an underworld light show, whatever that is. Blood Jhin was occupied with Akali and Kennen, keeping the First of Shadow and Heart of the Tempest at range while firing off shots. None of them were hitting, but the two Kinkou weren't able to get within close quarters either. Blood Talon was duking it out with Wukong, but with Wu's Wuju staff and Nimbus Clouds, the spectre was having a bit of trouble fighting Monkey Goku.

Which just left me and Blood Diana, and you'd better believe I was eager for a fight.

"You know, the last time someone that looked like you tried to kill me, it didn't end very well." I informed, putting my axe away to take out my bow.

"I am aware of this." Blood Diana replied. "But this time will be different."

"You wouldn't believe how many times I've heard that before." I informed, firing a single arrow. She effortlessly deflected it with her blade, which I'd been expecting. Had to gauge her strength, or whatever it is manga people do when they fight.

"True, but I represent the very antithesis to your power." She said. "This time, the will of my mistress shall be done."

"Ah, but there's one thing that you're forgetting." I replied, wagging a finger.

"Really? And what's that?" She asked.

"Never challenge me...when I'm in an environment where I can nerd out!" I yelled, suddenly producing a black pellet in my right hand.

"SMOKE BOMB!" I yelled for no reason, tossing the pellet down. It exploded into thick smog, shielding me from view. Blood Diana slashed through it with her blade, but I was already gone.

"Hey!" I waved from the entrance to the monastery. "Come on! We're just getting started!"

I ran through the doors, Blood Diana following close behind, only to find the whole building in total darkness. I had absorbed the flames from the candles, in order to achieve what I was planning.

"You have done well to make it this far." I snapped my fingers, revealing that I had set up the interior to momentarily look like a dojo. I myself was kneeling in the center, on one of two opposite mats. "But now your true test begins." This was so Karate Kid, but I was just going for it.

"Please. Sit." I gestured to the other mat. She hesitated, but then complied, albeit with her blade still drawn, dropping it to lay across her lap.

"Why do you continue to play games?" She asked. "You will perish, by my hand. Why do you only prolong the inevitable?"

I shrugged. "I suppose that I might as well enjoy my last few moments, right?"

"Now. Your ultimate test begins." I slowly reached behind my back, pulling out my secret weapon.

"Are you ready..." I whipped my hand out, Blood Diana raising her blade at my throat in response, but slowly lowered it at she observed the blue cards in my hand.

"To challenge me at Card-Jitsu?"


A water balloon smacked into Blood Diana's face, causing her to cough and splutter.

"ENOUGH OF THIS PETTY GAME!" She roared, standing up. "WE BOTH PLAYED WATER ON THAT TURN!"

"Yeah, but my power value was higher than yours, so I still won." I sighed, pinching and rubbing at my forehead. Explaining Card-Jitsu to a demon spirit was harder than I thought, but then again, the game had been invented by penguins.

"Okay, okay, just one more round." I said. "Then we can fight for real."

"NO MORE ROUNDS!" Blood Diana sent a bolt of red lunar energy into the ceiling. "YOU'VE PRATTLED ON LONG ENOUGH!"

"Look, I'll even give you a good card." I held one out to her. It was a powerful card with the element of Snow, and it involved bowling someone over with an inner tube. "See? Ten points. Should be easy."

"...This is the last time." Blood Diana took the card, setting it down to put it in play.

What she didn't know was that I'd completely played her. I mean, who accepts a card offered by their opponent.

And with that, I displayed a card with a measly three points, except it was Fire.

"No." I could almost see the spirit's look of horrible realization. "Not again."

"Oh, yes." A bottle of hot sauce popped into existence in front of me. "I hope you like spicy food!"

I sprayed the bottle at her feet, a jet of flame spewing from the nozzle. Blood Diana yelped, jumping up to avoid the blast, at the cost of her tunic, which had burns at the edge.

"ENOUGH OF THIS!" She lunged at me with her blade raised, the metal flashing with crimson light. "YOU WILL DIE!"

I rolled aside, retreating to the other side of the dojo. My axe was near the door, so I probably wouldn't be able to get to it...not that I was planning to, with what I had in mind.

"The real test begins, then!" I affirmed. "But I should warn you..." My eyes gained a sinister edge.

"I know Kung Fu."

I struck a crane pose. "HYYYAAAAAA!" I shouted in falsetto, trying to look like a proper martial arts master. Blood Diana looked downright confused, because she wanted a fight, not a Jackie Chan movie.

"Okay, first super-secret ninja technique!" I announced. I clasped my hands together, with both index, middle fingers and thumbs extended. "Fire Style! Fireball Jutsu!"

I sucked in, then unleashed a wave of flames from my mouth, because not only did it look cool, but as the creator of dragons, I had to do it sometime. The attack was a little slow, however, and Diana was already moving in as I finished, with her extremely creepy demon mask. One has to wonder if it gains any benefits from blood. I mean...maybe vampirism or something? I don't know, just random thoughts.

"Ninja Punch!" I yelled, driving my knuckles into her gut.

"Ninja Kick!" I snapped my foot against the side of her head.

"Ninja Block!" I grabbed her wrist as her sword came down.

"Ninja Toss!" I threw her over the top of my head, the spirit tumbling across the floor.

"Chop suey!" I threw a fireball, Blood Diana clumsily deflecting it with her blade.

"Nagasaki!" I charged one hand up with plasma bolts as she recovered, illuminating the entire room with white.

"Chidori!" I charged, aiming my clawed hand at her chest. It struck her stomach, sending her soaring through the air. She flipped before she hit the ground, landing in a crouch. Her breathing was heavy, numerous burns and bruises dotting her skin.

"FINISH HER!" A deep voice bellowed out of nowhere. This was starting to get a bit out of hand, but what the heck, I was having fun.

"Come get some!" I said, squaring my knees. Blood Diana flashed forward in a blood-infused Lunar Rush, a blur of light and motion. As I entered light-speed, I prepped one fist for the final attack. Just before her blade could impale my heart, I swung upwards, connecting with her jaw in a massive uppercut.

"SHOOORYUKEEEEN!" I yelled. Her mask shattered, bits and pieces crumbling to the floor.

"That's what you get for messing with a nerd!" I said, all too smug. What an amateur. The real Diana had been a complete pushover, and a cheap knockoff thought she'd have better odds? Give me a break. Actually, no, give me an actual challenge. You know what? I was gonna ask Syndra if we could throw down for no reason if I saw her. She's the only one who could give me a run for my money.

(AN: Oh, you'd better believe it'll happen, Helios. Don't worry, guys, there will be a (mostly) serious and dramatic fight that our hero will actually put some effort into, just you wait!)

"Still...at peak performance, as always..." Blood Diana gasped, as she struggled to her feet with her back turned. Her voice wasn't distorted anymore. In fact, she sounded a whole lot like the original. "I suppose I must give you some credit for that."

"But don't get me wrong, Helios." She turned around, with a smirk on her face, and- oh my gods.

It was her.

"We aren't done just yet." Diana finished. My hair combusted, and I lunged forward with murderous intent. She dissolved into red smoke as I made contact, leaving her fading laugh behind.

"We're only just beginning." Her final words were.

I scowled, opening one hand to allow my axe to return. "Should've known she'd want payback." I said to myself. "Time to wrap up this little game."

I fiddled with Ellis's music player at my waist, flipping through the available soundtracks. When I found a song that suited the situation, I kicked the door open, striding out into the battlefield the courtyard had become.

"Hey, ugly!" I shouted at Blood Fate, who was still entangled with Shen. I caught the spectre's attention, as the opening verse of the song began:

When there's somethin' strange...

In the neighborhood...

"Who you gonna call?" I asked.

Blood Fate gasped in horror.


There is no song in the entirety of existence that ghosts hate more than Ghostbusters. No, seriously. It's like a vocal form of holy water. No one knows why the song works so well; it just does. Not that we're complaining, of course. It's pretty entertaining to utilize.

The Blood spirits scattered as soon as I got into the chorus, making easy prey for Shen and the Kinkou. Shen's spirit blade cut through them like a hot knife through butter, or Camille's insults through someone's self-esteem when she's feeling particularly salty, which is always. She likes extra salt on everything she eats. Even ice cream, which explains a lot. Nothing like salty ice cream to set your foul mood for the rest of the day.

"DYA NAH DYA NAH DYA NAH DYA NAH DAH-DAH DA-DA-DA DYA NAH DYA NAH DYA NAH DYA NAH DAH-DAH DA-DA-DA!" I sang enthusiastically as we drove them off, screaming in terror.

"MAKE IT SSSTOP! MAKE IT SSSTOP!" One cried.

"THE HORROR! THE HORROR!" Another exclaimed. Geez, stop freaking out guys, it's just a song. You're all big boys, I'm sure you can wipe your own bottoms...if you guys even still go number two, that is. Hey, there's something to think about for the day!

"Guys, come on, stay a bit longer!" I complained as they began to disappear into the clouds, toward the moon. Suck-ups. "We didn't even get through the entire chorus yet!"

"I think everyone would appreciate it if you just stopped the song entirely, Helios." Akali deadpanned.

"Hell no! I'm way too into it!" I declined, shamelessly dancing to the beat. "I'll stop when the song is over!"

Akali sighed and waited for me to finish, which were some of the most unbearable moments of her entire life. "If you're done," She seethed. "can we discuss why Blood spirits decided to openly attack the Kinkou Order?"

"Er...that may or may not be my fault." I replied sheepishly. "The moon hates my guts and all that. I think this is the first time she's actually tried to have me assassinated."

"AND GUESS WHAT, SELENE?!" I screamed up at the moon, which was still painted red. "I FREAKING SURVIVED! YOUR HITMEN SUCK! DO IT YOURSELF NEXT TIME, YOU LAZY-ASS FREELOADER!"

"...You sound like you need to rest." Shen noted.

"I really do." I sighed. "Stress plus dealing with Selene equals headache. I don't suppose you have a room available?"

"We do." Shen nodded. "Second floor, fifth room at the back."

"Thanks." I dashed off, taking the stairs two at a time to reach my room. Only upon arrival, I found that it was a simple floor-height mat bed, with just a pillow and a blanket.

"What is it with ninjas and their need to push their bodies to the limit?" I grumbled, stripping down and throwing the blanket over myself. It wasn't that comfortable, but it would do.

The next morning, Shen agreed to take me to the Placidium. My back had miraculously survived the solid floor that served as my bed, and after waiting for Wukong to get ready (it takes a ridiculous amount of time for the furball to get his hair properly groomed), we were off. Shen made it easier on us by allowing us to smoke-bomb there. It looked pretty awesome. Akali and Kennen had to stay behind to look after the students, but theoretically we wouldn't need them for any special reason.

With a hop, skip and a poof, we arrived at the elevated heap of rock that the Placidium was raised on. The area was alive with activity, a marketplace at the base of the entrance, filled with all manner of exotic goods and smells. I could already feel my mouth watering.

And lo and behold, there stood the Placidium, in all of its wonderfully transcendent glory. I was looking forward to checking the place out. Rumor had it that people could learn Spirit Bombs there. I needed to expand my skillset. Well, maybe not, but regardless it'd be cool!

"Fish! Fresh fish!" A vendor shouted from a nearby booth.

"Get your spices here! 2 gold pieces for ten pinches!" Another shouted. It was a labyrinth of stalls and shops, all of them intertwined and tangled like a bizarre web of commerce. Capitalism at its finest.

I looked to the left to see that Shen, in the time I hadn't been paying attention, had swapped out his Kinkou uniform for traditional Ionian garments in various shades of white and red, going without his mask.

"What's with the getup?" I asked, looking him over.

"The Kinkou, myself included, are continuously celebrated for the work we do in keeping balance throughout Ionia." Shen explained. "I would rather not have to deal with an absurd amount of press at the moment."

"Yeah, okay, but what about him?" I jabbed a thumb at Wukong. "He's a sentient monkey, and no one's freaking out about him."

"I don't have an entourage." Wukong deflated, sighing.

Shen allowed himself a rare smirk. "That's because you're more trouble than you're worth."

"I am not!" Wukong protested. "I just...like to ruin everyone's day from time to time."

We both rolled our eyes. "And yet apes are supposed to be intelligent." I muttered. "Well, I don't know about you two, but I'm rather tempted to check the place out."

"Really?" Shen asked. "Aren't you in a hurry?"

"Oh, half an hour of peeking around couldn't hurt, could it?" I asked. "I'm in Ionia, for gods' sake, I think I'm entitled to try out the local delicacies. Tell you what, we'll meet up at the Placidium when we're done, and then from that point on, it'll be all business."

"Sounds like a plan to me." Wukong agreed, resting his staff on both shoulders. "C'mon Shen, let's go get some sake!"

"I will go my own way." He declined. "But another time, perhaps."

"Suit yourself." Wukong shrugged.

"Alright, see you in a few!" I waved as I disappeared into the crowd, nitpicking my way through openings in the mass gathering. "Charms against evil spirits sold here!" An old woman at a nearby shop said, crouched at her tiny stall. For some reason, it caught my eye. I decided to take a look.

"Why hello there, young man!" She beamed. "Have you come to inspect my wares?"

"Possibly." I smiled, looking them over. "What exactly do you offer?"

"Protection against demons, Blood spirits, all manner of malevolent deities, my boy!" She replied. "See anything you like?"

"What's this one?" I asked, pointing to a simple sun-shaped medallion. Yeah, me and my ego, but hey, I was curious.

"I acquired that one from a Solari warrior a few years ago!" She replied. "It's said to ward off servants of the moon, and with the terrors the Blood Moon's end brings every year, I wouldn't mind taking a few chances!"

"Hmm..." I fingered it delicately, tracing the material. With a sudden idea, I traced a small rune across the surface, something Lux had taught me when I asked. It glowed for a second, before fading.

"I can't say that I'll buy, but you might find that its value increased before long." I winked, leaving her at that and walking away.

"Fresh produce! Come and get it!"

"I offer only the finest jewelry! Come see!"

"Is anyone interested in extremely rare poros? (They were supposedly gold, but I could see they'd been thoroughly dyed)"

The market here was nuts. And I, for some reason, was loving it. I'd never seen such a colorful collection of oddities before in my travels, and it was nice to indulge in the local culture a little. But what I was looking forward to most of all? Food.

I spotted a small restaurant off to the side, and the smell of freshly cooked seafood and ramen lured me over. I briefly paused, though, when I noticed the small commotion occurring in some of the occupied seats

"I told you, I'm not interested." A cloaked woman said with her back turned to me, seated in front of the chef. The rejection was directed at a mook to her right, who was clearly trying to hit on her. He was pretty good-looking, fairly muscular, but it was offset by the fact that he looked like a jerk.

"Come on, entertain me a little?" He asked, inching a hand closer to her arm along the table. "You look like you're pretty good with your hands." Ugh. Disgusting. He flexed his biceps to show off with a smug grin. "I think you'll like what you find."

"For the last time, no." She growled. "Go bother someone else."

"I think you should at least give it a try, and maybe then you'll start to enjoy yourself." He grabbed her arm, attempting to pull her out of her chair. He was slapped in the face as a reply, but judging by the exclamation of pain and the three scarlet streaks dripping blood down his cheek, she'd used her claws. Some people say she needs to trim her nails, but that's just because they got punished for putting their hands where they shouldn't.

The man felt a hand to his cheek, scowling at her when he looked at the blood. "I was trying to be nice." He said.

"Lay off my customers." The chef snapped. "If you aren't going to order anything, then leave."

"Can it." The other guy sneered. "C'mon, beautiful, let's go take this somewhere else."

He was about to grab her again when I tapped his shoulder. "What?" He turned around with a scowl. "If you wouldn't mind, me and the lady are having a m-"

In all of two seconds, his crotch, nose, collarbone, stomach and forehead were struck consecutively. Nidalee had some pretty effective moves, and it helped that some of them were meant to ward off dirtbags. He trembled, then fell on his face, unconscious. I wiped my hands on my tunic, revolted. I then grabbed him by the hem of his shirt and tossed him outside. I sat down at the seat he'd previously occupied, crossing my arms on the table.

"A sake for me, if you please." I said, and the chef moved to pour me a cup after shaking off his stupor. I turned my head to the lady with a lazy grin. "Now, what's a pretty girl like you doing in a dump like this?"

"You're such a tease." Ahri rolled her eyes with a smile. "And I could've handled him myself."

"I'm kinda surprised that you turned him down." I smirked. "Since when do you reject an open invitation?"

"Since I stopped stealing essence from people." Ahri replied bluntly.

Oh, and if you were wondering, all those rumors about Ahri's one-night stands?Completely false. Ahri's never even let a guy into her pants. She only waited for men to last their guard, then drained them of essence. She didn't really have to go any farther than that.

I can already see you perverts salivating. Good luck seducing her, you sick freaks. She'll claw out your eyes if you try to sneak a hand up her waist. And that's actually happened, I'm not even kidding.

"You still didn't answer my question." I said. "It's odd to find you here, of all places."

"Do you know how hard it is to find a place that doesn't recognize me?" She asked. "Sometimes a girl just wants some time to herself, especially if she doesn't have to deal with people who are either after her head or her skirt."

"Point taken." I replied, taking a sip of my drink as it arrived. It was an interesting taste, but it was alright.

"If you're here about Noxus, then you're in luck." Ahri said. "Karma's already trying to get the elders to agree to go to war."

"Seriously?" I wiped my mouth after taking another swig, regarding the fox with curiosity. "How come?"

"Karma thinks we should be helping Demacia to win, not only as payback, but because we need to provide assistance to potential allies and friends." Ahri replied, then ordered food for herself. "Something about 'refusing to allow the victory of injustice,' when we could prevent it. She even asked the other champions to travel to the Placidium to show their support." She paused. "Which is another reason for why I'm here."

"What's the holdup?" I asked.

"The elders are being a bit stubborn." Ahri said with a faint scowl, indicating that stubborn was a bit of an understatement. "Too wrapped up in tradition and security to grow a pair and get something done. They'd rather play it safe, hope that we won't be slaughtered and executed like last time."

"And Karma disagrees." I concluded. "But why doesn't she just take her available warriors and head off? She technically doesn't need their compliance."

"Because they're threatening to take drastic measures if she makes a decision that could be potentially dangerous for Ionia." Ahri replied. "Karma's too afraid to invoke his 'performances' to go without their agreement."

"Drastic meas-" My eyes widened considerably. "You can't be serious. Him? They're willing to do that?!"

"It looks that way." Ahri poked at her food with her chopsticks glumly. "They're all corrupt, even if they won't admit it."

"Damn." I furrowed my brow, silent. "Well, I don't know about you, but I think I'd like to head over now and show my support. Shall we?"

"After we finish eating." Ahri said, gesturing to a second plate she'd ordered for me. We paid (well, Ahri did) after cleaning off our chicken and rice, thanked the chef for the food and offered a tip for knocking a guy senseless.

"Shen and Wukong are also here." I informed. "They should be done by now. We'll all head up to the Placidium together."

"...Oh." Ahri winced, looking away as we walked. "That's...nice."

"Ah, I'd forgotten that things are still awkward between you two." I grimaced. "He's still trying to get over you, isn't he?"

Wukong had had a crush on Ahri for a while, but while they were pretty good friends, Ahri had friendzoned him when he asked her out. Wukong apparently was still getting over it, although he'd looked fine for the time I'd recently spent with him. But it hadn't been Wu's fault. Ahri just wants a guy who can actually resist her charms. Wukong has about as much of a resistance to them as a moth does to a flame. It ain't healthy.

(AN: I know exactly who I want to pair Ahri with, and you would never guess. Wrong universe, to give a hint.)

"Well, if it helps, I can try to change the subject, keep you two occupied." I offered.

"That would be appreciated." Ahri replied both gratefully and nervously. I could see her tails shifting underneath the hooded cloak that hung over her eyes. "I've already had enough stress for one day."

"Well, get ready to enter the thunderdome," I said. "because I can see the two of them up ahead." They were waiting patiently by a noodle shop, appearing to have run into each other on the way, and sat down for a bit of ramen. I'd never heard of a place called Ichiraku's (wink-wink), but it looked worth a try after talking to Karma. Might be an ideal place for a date with Raka, actually.

Oh snap, Raka. She was here! Score! I was so gonna surprise her, and be all suave and cool about it too! I'd be all like "Miss me, Raka?" and she'd be all like "SEEEEEENNNNNNNPAAAAAAAIIIIIIII!" on me, and I'd just let her show puppy-love while looking like a total hottie.

...Okay, maybe that was unlikely. In fact, I was probably gonna be the one screaming senpai at her. And call her kawaii, too. Maybe call her my waifu. At the very least I knew what it meant, unlike Mordekaiser, who thinks that's what you call your friends. You should've seen what happened when he called Sona that back at the Institute. Ellis was there too, and it got ugly real fast. He stuck Morde to the ceiling with a giant magnet, and even when Sona got him to stop, he couldn't pry Lord Emo-Face off. Plenty of time for me to grab popcorn.

It turned out that Shen and Wukong weren't the only champions there. "Lee." I greeted, giving a short bow according to traditional Ionian standards. "Nice to see you again."

"Helios. Ahri." The Blind Monk replied, bowing in turn. "You look well." He chuckled. "Well, perhaps not look, but you certainly smell jubilant." Never mind how he smells moods. He smells a lot of things that seem impossible. He can even smell if someone's lying. Again, never mind how.

"Uh...hi, Wu." Ahri rubbed her arm bashfully.

"Hey." He looked away, frowning. "You look nice."

"Thanks." She replied, and they stopped talking after that.

"So, I trust that you are here to speak with Lady Karma?" Lee Sin asked. "She's been expecting you for some time. I was sent here to retrieve you, actually."

"Because she has zen powers, right?" I asked, smirking.

"I do not believe that is the proper term for it, but in a sense, yes." He replied. "Although I must confess, I was slightly disappointed that the Bestial Huntress did not accompany you. I would have thought that she would wish to be certain of your safety, given how she cares for you."

"Well, the Mama Cat does her own thing most of the time." I shrugged, but blinked after thinking over Lee's sentence. "Wait. Why do you care about whether Nidalee accompanies me on road trips or not?"

"A trivial matter, for now." Lee answered. "For now, we must focus. Shall we refrain from keeping Lady Karma from waiting any longer?"

"Of course." Shen replied. "I've heard much about the School of Transcendentalism, and I've been meaning to see if my students could gain any benefits from her teach-"

A gunshot sounded, and a shockwave was accompanied by a wave of heat as the Placidium erupted into flames.


Well, that's not good. Next chapter: X-Men: Apocalypse references! I bet you know which one I mean. Because that's totally something Helios would do. So, I can promise that next time, the real action starts, and depending on where I go with the story, the preface to the Syndra fight will either be next chapter or the one after that. Stay tuned, because I'm rolling up my sleeves! Until next time!

FicfansEverywhere