Their travels resumed the next day in yet more silence, not a word spoken between them as they broke camp and headed for the road. Despite it being plenty wide enough for the two of them to walk side by side, Felicity chose to trail just behind Oliver, her gaze fixed on a point between his shoulder blades, doing her best not to imagine the scars that she knew to be there. It was easier to avoid the conversation she knew they still needed to have this way.
Despite her wish to ignore it, it still weighed heavily on Felicity's mind, and after about an hour of walking in silence, she knew she could avoid it no longer.
"Oliver," she said, drawing even with him. "There's something I need to tell you." She didn't turn her head to look at him, but she swore she could feel his eyes on her.
"The other day, when I told you that you hadn't hurt me…" she continued hesitantly, "I lied. You did. I know you didn't mean to, but you did." She risked a glance over at Oliver. His gaze was fixed intently on her, his eyes shadowed with guilt. "The thing is...I'm in love with you, Oliver. I realized it after you got attacked, but if I'm being honest with myself, I have been for much longer than that, maybe even longer than I'm willing to admit. And when you kissed me, I thought- I thought maybe you felt the same way about me. But then you said that you regretted it-"
"I don't regret kissing you," Oliver interjected. "I regret the situation in which I did. I regret that I acted out of desperation and made it meaningless."
"Meaningless," Felicity repeated in a dull voice. She looked away from Oliver, but not before she saw him grimace as if pained.
"Damn it, that came out wrong," he muttered. "I didn't mean to say that kissing you didn't mean anything to me. It did. It's just… when I kissed you for the first time, I'd wanted it to be clear that I was doing it because I love you, and I-I ruined that." Felicity stopped in her tracks, only dimly aware that she was no longer moving.
"What?" she asked as Oliver's words filtered in, not sure that she'd heard him correctly. Her voice came out in a high, choked whisper. A few steps ahead of her, Oliver stuttered to a halt, seeming to finally realize that she was no longer beside him. He turned to face her, his gaze settling on her face.
"I love you," he said, quietly but emphatically. "When I was recovering from that attack, you were there constantly, helping me through it. You were so...kind, and gentle, and caring, and when things always seemed so much darker when you weren't by my side, that's when I realized that I... cared for you, in a way far deeper than one would care for a friend. And when those mages took you, when I woke up and you were gone...I thought I was going to lose you. But it wasn't until Darhk almost killed you and I realized that losing you would break me, that I couldn't live in a world that didn't have you in it, that I knew that I loved you." Felicity realized that she was holding her breath. She let it out in a rush, and then, as she was hit with the full force of Oliver's words, she began to cry, overcome with emotion.
"Hey," Oliver said gently, closing the gap between them. "It's alright. We're alright." He cupped her face and brushed her tears away with the pads of his thumbs. She offered him a weak, watery smile. The one he gave her in return was practically radiant. He kissed her then, still holding her face between his hands. Swept up in a rush of sensations and emotions, it was hard for Felicity to think, but nevertheless there was something in the back of her mind that noted- not for the first time- the dichotomy between the rough scrape of Oliver's calluses against her skin and the gentleness of his touch. They rotated slowly in place- Felicity knew that they were moving only by the dim awareness of the sensation of the hem of her dress brushing against her ankles- and when they pulled apart the exultant expression on Oliver's face sent a thrill through Felicity at the thought that it was there because of her.
It was only a moment before they resumed their journey, this time walking side by side. There was Felicity needed to hide from Oliver anymore, no difficult conversation she wanted to avoid having with him. She laced her fingers through his as she walked by his side, and he turned his head in her direction and smiled, a radiant smile like before. It suffused Felicity with a warm glow of happiness in much the same way a sunbeam might have.
Felicity's deliriously happy mood was ruined when an all too sobering thought occurred to her suddenly- what were they going to do when they met Oliver's mother face to face once more? Considering her prejudices, Felicity doubted she'd be too pleased that her son had fallen in love with a mage. What would they say to her about their relationship? Could they say anything at all? Or would they have to hide it for fear of incurring her wrath? The thought made Felicity pull her hand apart from Oliver's.
"Felicity?" he asked. "What's wrong?" Felicity shook her head, biting her lip to keep herself from divulging the worries that had risen up so suddenly to overwhelm her. It seemed she'd been too quick to think that there would be no more difficult conversations to avoid having with Oliver.
"You're worried about my mother," Oliver said that night, seemingly out of nowhere, as they sat side by side in front of their campfire. "About how she'll react to...all of this."
"How did you?" Felicity asked.
"Because I'm worried about it too," Oliver said. "Given her prejudices, I shudder to think of what she might do if she finds out about what's between us. What she might do to you."
"Why me, specifically?" Felicity asked, though she thought she knew what the answer might be, and it gave her a sick, nervous feeling in the pit of her stomach.
"Because, from her perspective, the fault for this will lie entirely with you," Oliver explained, his face and voice grim. "She'll see it as you corrupted me, or coerced me, or otherwise forced me to feel the way I do. The only way she could possibly interpret this is that her foolish, wayward son allowed himself to be misled by a mage, and she will seek to punish you for that." Felicity shuddered.
"So we'll just make sure she doesn't find out about us," she said, forcing herself to put up a brave front in order to reassure Oliver. "We'll figure out some way to keep it a secret from her. We have to."
