Epilogue
"Fate has a plan for us all…"
Long have I wondered about the hand fate plays in guiding our lives—in leading us down a given path. Are we merely pawns in a greater game? Do we have the power—albeit unknown to us—to forge our own destiny? Or does the truth of it all lay somewhere in between, amidst the grey? I do not know, nor will I ever. I—like everyone else—can only theorize; my notions grounded in uncertainty and conjecture. All I know—all I can know—are facts; truths as clear and incontrovertible as the stars…
It all began with an end: Beast Boy's death. News of it spread far and wide: through Jump City, the nation, and the world. Heroes from around the globe flocked to Jump to pay their respects, the city was shut down for three days as the citizens mourned, and a memorial commemorating him was commissioned. At its dedication, the mayor spoke of bravery…of sacrifice…of all people resisting and opposing the forces of darkness. The crowd cheered. I hid my tears.
Things changed within the city after that. Crime was virtually non-existent. Without Slade to guide them, many of Jump's criminals were inept; unable to mount a serious assault. They were soldiers without a general: unorganized, discordant, and petty. More surprising, however, was the change in the citizenry. The people of Jump were strong when they used to be timid and brave when they used to be craven. Beast Boy showed them the difference one person could make; it was a lesson they took to heart, banding together rather than cowering…taking a stand rather than giving in. Their newfound courage did much to discourage small-time criminals, who moved elsewhere fearing reproach or reprisal.
After Robin was discharged from the Jump City Medical Center, we began the process of healing the team. It was decided that Cyborg would take his place as leader. Robin did not object. Word of Beast Boy's death troubled him. He felt responsible and developed survivor's guilt. He became more distant and withdrawn than he was before, only leaving his room to eat. His relationship with Starfire—already strained—fell apart. He barely spoke; even when we reached out to him, he pushed us away.
Starfire was the first to leave. It had been almost a year since Beast Boy's death and the Tower still seemed hollow and barren—four walls and nothing more. She told us all over dinner one night: She was going back to Tamaran to take her place on the throne. The next morning, she said goodbye to each of us and left. Her heart was broken; she had lost a friend in Beast Boy and a lover in Robin. There was simply nothing left for her here. Destiny called. The adoration of her people awaited. For the first time in a long time, she was happy again.
Not too long after, Robin left. He simply packed his bags in the middle of the night and rode away on the R-Cycle. He never said goodbye. I think it was too hard for him. He couldn't look me in the eye and Cyborg—while maintaining civility—clearly did not trust him, nor did he forgive him for the death of his best friend.
Robin moved to the East Coast—New York City—and took up the Nightwing mantle. Though it was a new beginning –a new chapter—for him, it is clear that the sins of his past haunt him still.
Not long after Robin's departure, Cyborg began rebuilding the Titans, ensuring that the team would live on and continue to defend the city Beast Boy gave his life to protect. He brought in Wonder Girl to fill in for Starfire and Hot Spot to take Robin's place. He could not, however, bring himself to find a replacement for Beast Boy. On the field of battle, there was a void; At the table, an empty chair; In the Tower, a vacant room filled with the belongings of a fallen friend—a life interrupted, senselessly cut short.
Will, Rebecca, and Dr. Andrews were all forced to pick themselves up, dust themselves off, and get on with life. Will was fired following Beast Boy's death. Dr. Sinclair denounced him as a liability. His skills, however spoke for him: After a few more years of schooling, he took the Head Surgeon's position at Jump City General; a position he still holds. Rebecca continued working at the Jump City Medical Center and is now Head Nurse. She and Will are married and have three children. Dr. Andrews recovered fully and continues practicing medicine at JCMC. He was crestfallen by Beast Boy's death, believing he could have saved him.
As for me, the life I knew is gone forever. The years have pressed on, but it still feels surreal, like a nightmare I cannot escape. Some days are better than others. Some days, as Beast Boy told me that night, the sun shines and I know he is with me. But some days, the sun refuses to show itself and it is like all hope is gone—eclipsed by shades of grey. Some days, I swear I hear his laugh behind me or I see him on the edge of my vision, but I turn around and find that he is not there. He comes to me in dreams. I dream of our life together, the one we were denied…and we are happy…so happy… He holds me in his arms and I cling to him, begging him to stay with me… but soon after, I wake…in a cold sweat, surrounded by nothing but bitter nocturnal air. On those nights—forced from my bed, denied slumber—I fix myself a cup of tea and wander the halls to his room. I phase through the door and step into a moment in time—That Friday Afternoon, just before he went to the mall with Cyborg—when he was alive. I climb into his bed, wrap myself in his sheets, and breathe him in until I drift off.
Some nights, though, when nothing else helps, I come here—to this place—to feel near to him…if only for a moment. This place—in the heart of Jump City Memorial Park—where his monument—a bronze statue of him atop a large, marble base—stands. Here, he looks out upon the city—his gaze unwavering and resolved, his posture uncompromising—watching over it like he always had. In turn, the citizens leave trinkets—flowers, animal figurines, pictures, and notes—to pay their respects and light novena candles, ensuring he will never be left to the darkness. Beneath him, chiseled into the marble, is an inscription:
Memoria in Aeterna:
Garfield Mark Logan
Beast Boy
"Do not give in to evil, but proceed evermore boldly against it..."
I sit upon a nearby bench, looking upon him…wondering about what might have been. Would we be married? Have children of our own? Would we have retired to civilian life? I do not know…I cannot know. Time slips ever forward—cruelly so—leaving only distance to fill the void.
The sun peeks at me over the horizon, brightening the night's sky. With a sigh, I wipe away my tears and stand, knowing a new day—like an unwelcome intrusion—awaits me. As I begin to walk away, a rush of fear rises within me. My heart races and my stomach flutters uneasily. A bitter gust of air nips at my skin, entreating me to pull my cloak more tightly around my body. Slowly, I turn around, and gaze at his bronzed likeness glowing ethereally in the early morning light—novena candles flitting, casting dancing silhouettes. As I look upon him, I can only wonder—with a degree of dread—what the future holds: How many more listless days must I endure? How many endless nights? They slip into weeks…months…years… How long will I be deprived the love I barely began to explore?
A long sigh escapes me. I look to the moon and stars above. Beast Boy… Though his image stands before me, and I feel him all around me, an ocean of time stands between us. As tears cloud my vision, making the night sky but a kaleidoscope of divinity, I can only wonder…
How many lifetimes stand between us?
