Chapter Twenty Nine: Aftershocks
You earn
respect, so don't
expect it from me
straight away.
~Unknown
She's back. She left when dad needed her the most to rescue the creature that hurt her beyond description and left her in a depression that threatened to tear everything in our family to shreds. Dad fell apart when he came home from Harry's funeral to find that Bella had skipped town with Alice Cullen to save her precious Edward. She lied and said they went to LA when truth was they ran to Italy to save Edward from some sort of vampire royalty. If it wasn't enough to hurt our father, she also left Jacob in angry heartbreak. He could barely make it through a meal without phasing from pain or anger. He spent most of his time as a wolf and that was affecting Billy. Where would this end? The list kept growing as to number of people that had to suffer because of my sister.
I was never one to deeply hate a lot of people, but suddenly the list had been growing. From just Paxson and his family, to every leech that walked the earth, and my own sister for her stupidity and selfishness. I found out later that the pack had been chasing Victoria and almost had her when they heard Bella scream as she jumped off the cliff. Bella had provided enough of a distraction that Quil received a couple broken ribs and Victoria managed to get away. Jake had to dive into the dangerous water as the storm came in to save Bella before Victoria could get to her and had even had to revive her as she nearly drowned. All this as hell broke loose on the other side of the rez with Leah and Seth phasing causing Harry's heart attack.
None of this had to happen. For the first time since Bella had come to Forks I truly wished she had just stayed with her mother or gone back to live with her after Renee and Phil settled in Florida or after she ran away to Phoenix. Without her the pack would have remained small, the pack wouldn't have to be risking their lives to protect her from this revenge seeking vampire, dad would be safe in his own home, Harry would be alive and able to see his children grow up and have their own children, the Cullens would have moved on by now and poor Jacob wouldn't be spiraling in heartbreak driven depression over her as she ditched him for a cold, dead, walking corpse that was a danger to everyone he and his 'family' came in contact with.
Since Leah and Seth had phased everything had once again fallen into chaos no matter how hard Sam tried. Seth was a good sport about everything that was going on, but Leah was spiteful. She was doing everything in her power to make everyone as miserable as she was. I was her main target. She blamed me for Sam leaving her and for being the leech lover's sister. She saw me as an enemy and made damn well sure that I knew it at every twist and turn. Sam was about pulling his hair out of his head as he tried to keep the peace and make everything work. He was running around like a chicken with his head cut off as he ran between the council, the pack and the Cullens. The only time he was home was to crash into our bed and get a few short hours of sleep before the cycle continued the next day.
The only thing the whole pack had in common was an anger at the Cullens for causing this. Jacob for taking Bella away and leaving the pack to deal with Victoria while they ran off. Sam because it caused all of them to give up the possibility of a normal life and the chance of ever having anything outside of La Push. Jared for putting his family and Kim in danger. Paul for making him phase, as it caused his temper to ravel out of control, he tried so hard and some days it was impossible to put a lid on it and putting his new found imprint in danger. Embry for the life he was forced to live, the secrets and the disconnect between him and his mom. Quil for putting his new found imprint in danger. Leah for making her phase, taking away Sam and her father from her, ruining her life as she had planned it. Seth was the least angry. He was more or less upset at the chaos and danger that it brought to those around him.
Since the Cullens had come back, Bella had spent even less time at home with dad. He felt that he was losing her to the Cullens all over again and he was. The only difference from September and now is that they weren't going to leave Bella behind again. The next time they left they were going to take her with them and they were going to change her. He was going to lose her and he was going to lose her permanently, there is no other option. She would have to 'die', for real or by being a vampire and that would break dad's heart. He already feared it after coming so close a couple times with Bella and I. When his fears became reality it was going to crush him and there was nothing that anyone could do about it. Dad would have to face a headstone with one of his daughters' name on it and would have to grieve another loss at Forks Cemetery.
I figure that the only way I would be able to live with that is if I made one more attempt to change it and that brings me to now as I drove toward the house that I had grown up in. I knew dad had grounded Bella for her stunt and she was only allowed to see Edward after dinner, so he wouldn't be at the house with her and Sam wouldn't throw as big of a fit knowing that I had taken this precaution. I pulled into the driveway next to the cruiser. Bella's truck was parked along the road as usual as I made my way into the house.
"Hi, dad." I said and he turned away from the TV and gave me a wave.
"Hey, what are you doing here?" Dad said as he got out of the chair and came to give me a hug.
"I want to talk to Bella." I said and the smile left dad's face.
"Okay." He said and I hated the look on his face.
"And when we're done talking I'll hang around for a little while. I miss that extra time with you." I said and dad gave me a little smile.
"Well okay then. Don't be too tough on her." He said and I snorted. She was going to hear what I had to say and I wasn't going to take her feelings into account today. Lord knows she never has for anyone else. I climbed up the stairs and knocked on Bella's door before opening it. She was sitting at her desk working on a paper.
"We need to talk." I said and closed the door behind me as she turned away from her desk. I walked over to the window that was left opened on the other side of the room and slammed it closed sliding the lock into place. We would not be having any visitors during this discussion.
"Well I don't want to talk with you and you can get out. I don't care what you have to say." Bella said defiantly as she stood from her chair and I rounded on her.
"I don't give a shit if you want to hear what I'm about to say. You need to listen to me and put it to a lot of thought. Your life is not the only one being affected with your actions." I said and Bella opened her mouth.
"Your actions directly affect dad, me, and Jacob. Beyond that your actions affect every person that dad comes into contact with because it is affecting how people look at him. The chief with the flighty ex-wife and now a flighty daughter. And do you think that every time you run off it doesn't affect him? It damn near breaks him each and every time. It breaks his heart that his daughter would run off at the drop of a hat just like the woman he once loved.
Then I get the pity. The scars aren't enough. Now it's 'poor thing her sister is just like her mother, how does she handle that?' Do you see Bella? Your actions reflect on dad and I just as much as on you.
And don't play me for dumb. I know the next time the Cullens leave that you'll more than likely be with them. In fact, it'll probably be your choice. I want to make sure you know the consequences of that decision. And not just to you or to dad, but to everyone." I said and Bella started to talk but I cut her off.
"Though I will start off on how it will effect dad. It will be another loss for dad. He's buried his parents, lost the woman he loved, had to watch one of his daughters grow up from a distance, and buried two friends. He will no longer be able to walk around this house and not see you everywhere he looks. Walk into the kitchen and see you cooking dinner. Walk past the door to this room and see you sleeping in your bed or working at the desk. He'll see someone that has something that resembles you and remember that your gone. He'll go by the high school and remember that you spent many hours a week there. He'll go by the cemetery and see your headstone along with the other people he's lost. His life will be changed forever because of your decision.
Next Renee. She'll blame the Cullens, and dad, and the town and herself for you being gone. I'm sure you can figure out the rest of that speech." I said and sent a look to Bella.
"Jacob." I said and Bella flinched. I'm glad she knows where this is going.
"Jake has the short end of the stick. He'll know the truth. He'll know that you threw everything away to live out eternity with Edward. He'll be bitter, but when he gets over the bitterness at Edward and the Cullens, it will turn to you. He'll see the time he spent with you every time he walks into his garage or his living room. On the beach, at Sam's and my house. And the worst part when you're changed you'll be something that he hates. Something that he was born to kill and destroy for the safety of his tribe. He'll be bound to kill you. What do you think that is going to do to him? He loves you and he's heartbroken about your decision. What would killing the girl he loves do to him?" I demanded and Bella didn't try to answer. She looked at the ground and I was glad that my point was getting acrossed.
"And do you know why he would have to kill you and your precious Cullens?" I asked and Bella looked up at me and I could see panic in her eyes.
"There's this thing called a treaty between your Cullens and the pack. Says that the pack won't attack the Cullens as long as they don't come onto Quileute land and as long as they don't bite a human. That doesn't mean that they would have to suck you dry, that just means that they bite you to change you and they are in violation. You will be starting a war, Bella. A war. Do you really want to be the reason that a supernatural war has started?" I demanded.
"We would leave. We wouldn't stay here." She started blabbering and I shook my head.
"That. Doesn't. Matter." I said and accentuated every word as I looked Bella in the eye.
"The treaty doesn't pertain to a certain geographic area. Once you are bitten neither you or the Cullens will be able to come back. You will be the enemy and will be killed on the spot. But let's say that you do leave and don't come back and everyone out of the know thinks you're dead. What is your life going to be like? You won't be able to have friends. Dad and Renee will think you're dead and I'm here. The Cullens will be your only family. It'll be a life of solitude. Of course after a decade or so you'll be able to go to school. Constantly repeating high school? Get a few degrees at colleges around the world? But what would be the purpose be in your life? Be at Edward's side forever? What kind of a purpose is that? It's like going back in time to when women were only allow to play suzie little homemakers.
But let's forget about that for a second. After you change do you remember what your life will be revolving around? Blood, Bella, blood. You pass out from blood and can't stand the sight or smell, but your willing to be changed into a vampire and drink it for the rest of eternity? But passed that you'll have to learn how to control the thirst. Can you handle if you slip up? Can you handle taking someone's life? An innocent life? There would be a whole other group of people that would be affected by your decision. The person, their parents, siblings, friends, family, children, the love of their life.
Is that really what you want? Is that what you had your future pictured as? Is Edward worth that? You can love him human, it puts you and everyone in danger, but you can love each other with you human. Can you explain to me what would make the future I just depicted for you, so glamorous that it would be worth throwing your life away?" I demanded and Bella was quiet, but I really wanted an answer. I leaned against the foot board of her bed and raised an eyebrow.
"I love him." She whispered and I laughed.
"Yeah, I figures that out, but it's not what I asked." I said and waited for a real answer.
"I don't want to lose him. If I'm like him than he won't leave to protect me." She said and I bulked at her.
"That's what he told you? That he left to protect you?" I asked and Bella nodded. She raised her eyes to meet mine and I could see she was going to defend him no matter what I said. I nodded my head and looked toward the window.
"Okay. But what did he do before he left to protect you?" I asked and looked back to Bella.
"He protected me from Tyler's van, he protected us from those drunks in Port Angeles, he saved me from James, he's protected me from Jasper when his blood lust got to be too much, he even protected me from the Volturi." Bella said and I held back an unladylike snort.
"Why did we need to be protected from those drunks, Bella?" I asked and she looked at me confused.
"They were going to hurt us." She said and I nodded.
"Yes, they were and probably do worse than just hurt us. But why were we in that ally in the warehouse distract? If I remember correctly it was because you wouldn't listen to me when I said that you weren't going to find the book store you wanted, but wanted to see for yourself.
Why were you in the situation to be attacked by James? Is it because Edward took you out with his family in the forest? And Jasper? Why were you in a situation that a vampire could lose control of his blood lust and attack you? And lastly, why were you in Italy to be in danger from the Volturi? Have you noticed the pattern Bella?" I asked and she cringed away from me as I accused her and her perfect Edward.
"Have you noticed that you and Edward are the cause of each of those situations? Shit happens Bella, it happens to everyone and that is understandable. But with all this can you see that the two of you are like fire and gasoline? It makes every situation dangerous and not only for you and Edward and the Cullens, but everyone around you." I said and glared at Bella.
"Well I no longer have a choice." Bella said as she glared at me.
"Oh really, enlighten me?" I said and leaned forward.
"Because if the Cullens don't change me, the Volturi will come for a visit and we either kill all of us for breaking the number one vampire rule or they will kill you all and take me back to Italy to change me." Bella said and I let a hysterically giggle escape.
"Great. Just great." I said and shook my head.
"War or death for all. Lovely options." I said and walked out of the room shutting the door behind me.
