The song for this chapter is Matt Corby - It's Good To Be Alone
JOHNNY'S POV:
My breath came harsh and uneasy as Henry and I raced through the deadly forest. I wasn't sure how I was able to move so quickly, maybe it was the adrenaline. Maybe it was my will to live, to make sure Emori's sacrifice wasn't in vain. She died so I could have a chance at living. So Henry could have a chance at living. Maybe that's what drove me to keep going, to keep running.
"How much further?" I wheezed as we rested against a slope.
Henry took in our surroundings then looked back at me. No emotion in his cinnamon brown eyes. "We made it."
My eyes narrowed as they scanned the area. There was nothing here, just a stream, and more trees. "Made it where?"
"To the border. We're in the free man's land. We need to keep going."
I grabbed his arm. "Hold on a minute. If we're safe here for the time being why don't we rest a little longer?"
He rose and shook my hand off. "We still have hours of daylight left, we don't want to waste it by sitting around. Let's go."
I groaned as I pushed off the ground and ran after Henry.
CLARKE'S POV:
"Clarke," Bellamy called as he moved the last of the boxes into our new apartment downtown that James helped us get. Bellamy sat the box on the couch with a thud. "We should get something to eat."
I focused on placing the dishes we hardly used in the cabinets. Between the two of us we used like five dishes. "And just leave this mess until later?"
He gave me an amused look. "You sound like a housewife."
My heart skipped a beat as I averted my eyes. Just hearing him say the word wife was enough to send me into cardiac arrest. The magazine was really starting to take over my life, which was really kind of pathetic. Maybe I should talk to my mom about it. I knew she'd never approve of the idea this early on. I was seventeen. My birthday was in a few months and I could only imagine the big event of it all now that we lived in the city.
"Hey," He came behind me, his chin rested on my shoulder as he pulled me to him. "You okay, Princess?"
A smile played on my lips. I nodded. "Great. I just never thought we'd have all these domestic duties."
He turned me to him, his brow rose. "Is it too soon for you? Is that why you've been acting weird lately?" Worry in his voice.
Of course, he noticed. "It's just strange. Me shopping for medicine, going to clubs, living in an apartment."
His finger tipped my chin up. "Well, if it's okay with you I like your domestic side."
A grin overtook my face. Maybe he had already thought about our future in the same way I had. I mean, all it really was is just a piece of paper that said you'll live together permanently and maybe have kids. Well, what if he didn't want kids? We were already basically parenting the 100, or what was left of us.
He smirked. "I can see you in your apron, making dinner." He brought his forehead down to mine. "Us having careers. Vacation time."
I ignored the sexist cooking comment and leaned up to catch his mouth with mine. What he was suggesting wasn't too far off from marriage. There was a chance I didn't have anything to worry about. My arms draped over his shoulders. Our kisses deepened and I knew where this was headed. He reached down and picked me up, my legs wrapped around his waist.
I didn't want to be one of those couples that all they did was have sex, but with Bellamy looking the way he did it kind of made it hard to not say yes. It really isn't my fault he got me riled up. He was intense on so many levels and I couldn't imagine what I'd been thinking before when weren't together.
He layed me down on the bed gently. His brown eyes scanned my body, setting it aflame. I couldn't think of anything better than Bellamy making love to me. I actually giggled at how cheesy that sounded, but those giggles caught in my throat when he peeled his shirt over his head. Every muscle, every ab, every smooth plane of tan skin was mine. Once he was on the bed he crawled to me, a grin on his lips.
I pulled him to me, but he flipped me over.
We layed in bed, panting when Bellamy's phone rung. He answered it then sighed.
"Okay, I'll be there in half an hour." He hung up and looked at me. "Mr. Wyatt called a meeting."
I rose. "About what?"
He followed suit. "Not sure. It's just us guys though."
"Oh. Okay." I sat back on the bed.
"It shouldn't take long." He reached for his clothes and I was sad to see him clothed. "When I get back we're going out for dinner, alright?"
I nodded. "Sure. I'll just clean up in here first."
He grinned as he buttoned his pants. "You're so cute when you're domestic."
My cheeks flamed. "Screw you, Bell."
He laughed. "I gotta go."
We started towards the front door.
He turned back and reached into a nearby box. "I left my keys in one of these boxes."
I rushed forward, recognizing the box for the relationship ruiner it was. I smacked his hand out the way. He pulled back, giving me a worried look. "Don't. You're going to be late. I'll look for them."
"I don't want to leave without them."
My shoulders shrugged. "It's not like I'm going anywhere. I'm staying here."
"Okay, then."
"Okay."
He gave me a worried look before he left.
Packing up the boxes occupied me for about twenty more minutes and then I couldn't stop pacing the room. I had to talk to someone. Octavia wasn't here and I wasn't sure I'd be comfortable telling her about how I wanted to not too far off into the future marry her brother. I mean, this was huge and he could read Octavia better than he could read me, which was really saying something. There was always Harper. Definitely not Roma. Then there was Talia, who already knew about the situation and my hesitation. I wouldn't have to explain anything to her. She'd tell me what I needed to hear.
A few minutes later we were sitting on the balcony of her apartment, lavish in the same ways Aiden's had been. She had her hair up in a messy bun. I didn't understand why she always wore so much makeup, she looked effortlessly beautiful without it. Grey sweatpants covered her long legs and an oversized t-shirt hung from her loosely. Her dark eyes were puffy like she'd been crying.
"You go first," I told her.
She sighed and stayed silent for a while before she pushed off the wool couch and came back with a bucket of ice cream, some can labeled whipped cream, and two spoons.
She stared off into space. "Lincoln isn't over Octavia."
I stared at her with confused eyes. "No...I've seen them together. I've seen you two together. Nothing's going on."
She sighed, her hands rubbed her face. "What do you think we've been arguing about the last few days?"
That didn't make any sense. When I saw Lincoln he wasn't focused on Octavia. He watched Talia the whole night. So where was this insecurity coming from?
"Lincoln said that to you?"
"He denied it."
I sagged as I dug into the chocolate ice cream. Why hadn't I been eating this my whole life? Right, I'd been rationing with real food.
"Talia, I'm just going to tell you this once." I turned to her. Her dark brown eyes sad. "You making issues up isn't going to push him away."
Her eyes widened. "What? I wasn't..."
As soon as recognition swept over her, she crumbled, falling onto me unexpectedly. She buried herself into me, shaking with bottled up emotion. My arms wrapped around her, remembering my insecurity with Bellamy before we started dating. It wasn't hard to guess she'd push him away because she was afraid.
"You're going to be okay. You just need to talk to Lincoln. He won't know what's going on with you if you don't talk to him."
Her body shook against me. "There's something..." She sobbed. "I can't...tell him." She clung to me even tighter, I was afraid to let her go.
"It can't be that bad."
She looked up at me with wet red rimmed dark eyes, her chin trembling. She pulled rom me. "He'll never forgive me."
Tears stung my eyes. "What is it?" I couldn't imagine anything terrible that Lincoln couldn't forgive.
She swallowed as she hung her head, her shoulders slumped. "I drugged Octavia."
My head snapped up as I roughly pushed her off of me with disgust in my eyes. "What?!" I rose, anger stirred. "You drugged her?"
Shame stung her eyes worse than tears while she nodded. "I shouldn't have done it, I know."
"Then why did you?" I demanded loudly.
Her body curled up on the couch and it seemed as if she was trying to erase her existence as she shook.
"Talia,"
She didn't answer.
"Talia!"
All she could do was rock. I wouldn't get anymore out of her. How could I trust her? I thought of her as a friend in the short time I'd been here. She was hurt and confused, I get that, but drugging someone because you're jealous of them wasn't okay. I was glad for the first time in days that Octavia wasn't here because she would surely get kicked out for kicking Talia's ass when I'd tell her.
My mind went to Bellamy while I made my way out the door outside. I had to tell him we couldn't trust Talia, that my closeness to Aiden clouded my judgement about her. Aiden would never do something like that and now I knew not to put it past Talia. Evan, I hadn't seen much of him lately, but I didn't think he do something to despicable.
The receptionist at the Wyatt building let me up even though they were in a meeting. I told her I'd make it short. All I really had to do was pull Bellamy to the side because I couldn't sit on this. The wedding issue was a different story.
BELLAMY'S POV :
"Hold the door," A familiar voice called.
My hand flashed out in time to stop the doors from closing. Kane slid inside with a grin.
"Thanks." He surveyed me. "You feel any better?"
I leaned against the elevator wall. "Much thanks to Clarke." A grin sprung to my lips when I thought of my personal doctor. "Thanks for that by the way."
He chuckled. "You asked for it when you ate the last of my eggroll."
I nodded my head with a laugh. "Yeah, kind of."
"How's that going by the way?"
My forehead creased. "Clarke and I?"
"You two are very serious. Have you thought about the next step?"
"We just got an apartment today, that's enough for now."
He pursed his lips. "You sure?"
"Yeah, I'm sure." I said with finality.
We kept silent the rest of the ride until the doors opened."
Eli, Evan, Jaha, and James sat at the long table, chatting. James stood at our presence. "Gentleman, we were just getting started."
We took a seat.
The meeting went faster than expected. The entire time I was wondering what Clarke was putting away. She was so cute. I liked that we were moving forward, but that we were on the same page. It made everything so much easier.
James pulled me to the side as everyone chatted. "I wanted to ask you about Clarke."
I still didn't like the guy so the hairs on the back of my neck stood up. "What about Clarke?"
He offered a friendly grin that reminded me of a cat. "You know it was in the works that Aiden and Clarke be married. We all know that's not going to going to work out for anybody. A union of any kind helps everyone believe we can all be civil. I wanted to touch base with you about your situation. Are you two discussing your future? Marriage? Kids?"
I couldn't help but laugh. "You can't be serious? You want us to get married to help this whole thing look good?"
He nodded. "Bellamy, I'm just asking about the progression of your relationship."
Irritation rose as I sighed. "Well, Clarke and I are fine. We're not getting married. We don't want kids and I don't appreciate you forcing us into the situation, James!"
Everyone stared at us, their eyes wide.
"What? I'm sick of everyone pushing us into something that we don't want."
Kane tried to shake his head without anyone noticing. He nodded behind us.
I turned to see Clarke frozen in the doorway, her wide blue eyes a mixture of confusion and disbelief as she stared at me. With her head down she high tailed it for the stairs.
Fuck.
I ran after her, she was fast for a little thing.
"Clarke, wait up."
She didn't stop.
"Clarke!"
"Leave me alone."
I jumped down half a flight of stairs to catch up with her, my heart beating out of my chest. My hand grabbed her arm and pulled her to me a little too hard. Tears were in her eyes, she blinked them away. "What were you doing here?"
"Apparently, I'm breaking up with you."
My forehead knitted together. "What?"
"I thought we were on the same page, but we're not. I thought this move was a good sign. I thought us being here was good, but...it's all been in my head."
"What are you talking about, Clarke?"
Her eyes looked to the ground as she pulled away from me. "This isn't working for me."
"Since when?"
With a huff she reached into her purse and shoved the magazine to my chest. "I didn't know how to tell you. And I guess now I don't have to because it was never on the table." She rushed down the stairs again.
I was going to go after her then the magazine fell and I bent to pick it up. I stayed in that position, too dumbfounded to believe my eyes. She wanted to get married. She wanted a family, everything James said. And I flat out announced it wasn't going to happen. With a groan my fist punched the wall.
OCTAVIA'S POV:
The water tribe I found had taken a liking to me. When I arrived with my hands in the air and announced, "Ai laik Okteivia kom skai kru en ai gaf gouthru klin.", they listened. At first they stared at me like I was myth, probably hearing about my training with Indra, and then I was brought in for questioning. Once they believed I was no longer a threat, I was welcomed to take refuge with them. I kept the city to myself, thinking that it wasn't my place to tell them about it. Given the opportunity, I'd think most if not all these people would chose to live how they've always did.
For the first few days I'd been there Atiya, the Chief, had me by her side often. I wasn't sure if she didn't trust me completely or if she wanted me to be one of her warriors. Either way I had a new place to stay. New people. New jobs. Everything I needed was right here. I could be me again.
"Theya," I called after that tall lanky dirty blonde who reminded me of Jasper.
If Jasper had a female counterpart Theya was it. Awkward and goofy. She thought she wasn't strong, but she was. The first day she practically ran into me when I got out of interrogation. Atiya volunteered her let me bunk with her. I was glad she was enthusiastic about it because I really couldn't take any more hatred thrown my way right now. Of course there were a few skeptics that gave me the stink eye when we crossed paths, but other than that I could imagine calling this place home.
She turned her green eyes on me, eyes that reminded me of someone's, but I couldn't put my finger on it. "Sup skygirl." She grinned at me, holding a basket of fruit in her hands. I learned not to stare at her chipped front tooth, it was one of her obvious insecurities that made her shy. She was beyond gorgeous, but her introvertedness for most people made her modest and adorable.
"I'm going to get dinner." I raised my spear. "Afterwards can we go further with our lessons?"
She nodded happily. "I'll be in tending to the garden. Come find me when you're ready."
"Octavia?" Someone called.
I turned around to see Arthur heading our way. His curly red hair was pulled back into bun. He grinned his wide grin, a grin that would've made me weak in the knees if my stupid heart didn't belong to stupid Murphy. Big greyish blue eyes gazed at me in the same way Theya gazed at him.
"I'm having a get together tonight in the woods by the dead tree and you are cordially invited." He bowed.
I couldn't help but grin. "Thanks. Theya and I might swing by if we're not busy."
He turned towards her, his hand held out for hers. He brought a kiss to her the back of her hand which made her blush fiercely. "Of course two gorgeous ladies have plans." He glanced back at me.
She dropped the basket of fruit, scrambled to get pick them up. She avoided our eyes.
Arthur bent down to help her, catching her gaze. "You're cute when you're clumsy, Theya." He smiled as he handed her the basket.
She froze and blinked a few times, at a loss for words.
He rose. "Well," He backed away. "If you two find yourself lonely and bored you know where to find us."
I nodded. "Will do, Arthur."
He smirked at us both. "See you around."
Theya turned to me with wide hazel eyes. "What just happened?"
I laughed as I pushed her blonde braid off her shoulder. "Arthur just flirted with you my dear."
Her eyes narrowed and her pouty lips pursed. "No," She shook her head. "He likes you." Her voice saddened. "I can't really blame him. You're really pretty."
"And I'm very much spoken for." By a man that didn't exist anymore. Sad, but true.
She shot me a sympathetic look. "I'm sorry."
I waved it off with a huff. "I'll manage."
I coughed the salt water up as I crawled to the shore, sand sticking to me wet body. I punched my chest a few times.
Theya made an apologetic face. "Sorry. I thought you had it."
My eyes narrowed.
She paled. "My bad, Tay."
I rolled onto my back, I focused on the dark clouds threatening the orange and purple sunset. Story of my life. With an eye roll I pushed off the ground. "Thanks, but I think that's enough for today."
"Again, sorry." She gestured with her hands raised.
"Did anyone ever tell you that you apologize too much?"
She nodded. "Everyday."
I shook my head with a grin.
We started back for the camp.
"I've been meaning to ask you." She glanced at me nervously. "What was it like being in a relationship, being in love? I mean, you don't talk about Murphy..."
Theya was so innocent, so pure that she literally had no knowledge of intimacy. She was definitely rare. Not all, but most Grounders didn't share her purity. So when I figured out she liked Arthur I was shocked. He didn't seem her type. I couldn't for the life of me understand how he couldn't notice how she felt about him. Boys were dumb. Not all, but most.
I looked to her. "It feels different with each person. When Lincoln and I first got together it was fiery passion. I needed to see him and when I finally did it felt like I could breath again. He taught me a lot. I don't think I'd be the person I am today without him." I hoped he was doing okay. I was regretting not saying goodbye to anyone besides Aiden.
"And Murphy?"
Tiredness washed over me as I studied the ground. "It was gradual. When we first landed we were all testing our freedom, but he pushed boundaries that shouldn't have been crossed. Everyone thought he was a psychopath. Even then I tried to stop them from killing him. He tried to kill my brother and I hated him more than I hated anyone. The sight of him made rage. I wanted him dead. Then he saved me a few times and all of a sudden he wasn't so bad anymore. I knew he had feelings for me or whatever and I tried to push that under the rug, but I couldn't. I couldn't ignore the jolt of excitement when I saw him or heard him nearby. Or how his grin seemed personalized for me. How he tried to be better and everyone still saw him as a criminal. We were friends and he didn't have a lot of those. He trusted me and I pushed him away because I was scared and I thought love was weakness. Weakness was death. Then he died and I realized I was in love with him. It was too late."
Her eyes looked on the verge of tearing up. She blinked a few times and glanced away. "I know I've said it a lot since you've known me, but I'm really sorry, Tay." She held her hand out for mine.
I took it. "It's okay."
There was no use in telling her that Johnny was alive. I wasn't getting Murphy back and I had to accept that. Sob stories wouldn't help me move on any faster. I had to keep fighting this fight and pinning over Murphy only helped. Truth be told, I should've fought harder for him. That was on me. There would always be that what if hanging in my mind. But I wouldn't be responsible for erasing one person to bring another back. Johnny wanted to live, he didn't want to be reminded of Murphy's past, of me. He'd live a nice comfortable life in the city and settle down with a good safe girl and have a few kids and dog. I could live with that, I had to.
"So what do you want to do now?" She pursed her lips as she picked off a piece of lint on her shirt that wasn't there. "I guess we could swing by Arthur's party. You know, if you wanted to?"
Her casual tone made me laugh. "I guess we can do that."
She squealed. "I've never been to a party. What am I going to wear? Arthur's going to be there."
"Yeah, it's kind of his party, Theya."
She gave me a look. "I still want to look nice." She dragged me back to our tent where I layed on my bed.
When she couldn't settle on an outfit I asked, "What's wrong with what you have on? He called you gorgeous earlier." I didn't have the heart to tell her all of her clothes looked the same, the standard Grounder black and navy blue.
She huffed as she flopped down on her bed, a pink pout in place. "Why can't I look all dark and mysterious like you? I wouldn't even have to try."
Looks were objective to me. Personality mattered more than anything. If Lincoln was a jackass when we met I doubt I'd give him the time of day. Murphy was different. I think from the beginning I didn't want to believe he was the monster everyone thought him to be.
"I've done some pretty ugly things, Theya. We all have. If you want to be dark and mysterious then get our ass out of the garden and tell Atiya that you want to be a warrior. Make her hear you."
She cowered with a shake of her head. "I can't, Tay. I tried when I was younger. She doesn't want me anywhere near it."
I sat up on the bed. "Theya, listen to me. You're not weak. You're a Grounder. We fight for what we want." I was aware that I couldn't seem to take my own advice about Murphy, but that didn't apply in this situation. I couldn't be selfish when it came to him.
"You don't understand."
My head shook. "She's your mom and she wants you safe, that I understand. But you not knowing how to fight or survive on your own isn't helping you, it's hindering you. You can do this. You can stand on your own two feet." My heart ached when I realized how much I missed Indra. Even when she was cold she was caring. I'd probably never feel that kind of love again. Atiya was a great Chief, but she wasn't Indra. Indra would probably crack a grin at knowing her second was now under the command of her mentor.
Theya groaned. "Okay," She rose. "I'm just going to go casual." She picked up her navy blue top that I couldn't really differentiate between the others. "This'll work."
"I'm sure Arthur will love it on you. Now let's go before all the alcohol is gone."
She pulled down her shirt with a squeal. "Geez, this is going to be awesome."
Her excitement was cute. I couldn't really be irritated at her.
"Let's go."
"Wait," I began taking down her braid, letting loose dirty blonde curls fanned across her shoulders. "Now you're ready."
She grinned.
We made our way to the only dead tree within miles, the rhythmic drumming that made its way into our bones loosened us up. She squeezed my hand as she took in it. I turned to her.
"You've really never been to one of these before?"
She shook her head, her hair falling into her face. She shoved it back on her head. "No and thanks for reminding me why I always braid my hair."
Someone's saucy.
She glanced at me. "Sorry, Tay." Her hair fell in her face again. She made an adorably angry face, like a little kitten that thought it was a lion. She could be a lion if she wanted to be.
I moved her hair behind her ear.
She giggled. "People probably think we're lesbians."
I shrugged as I was reminded of the lesbian act I committed against Murphy. "Don't really care what they think. You shouldn't either." My eyes roamed the crowd, recognizing a few people that have welcomed me. A lot of people were still skeptical.
"Let's go get a drink." She pulled me along. "You know you really didn't have to bring your sword with you. It's a party."
A guy handed us two metal cups, which I assumed had something similar to Jasper's moonshine. "Drein daun."
I didn't question it, but downed the cup. Theya did the same.
She made a disgusted face as her eyes found mine. "I wasn't missing much."
I laughed. She joined in.
Arthur stopped in front of us. "Octavia, glad you could make it." His eyes went to Theya and he looked shocked. "Damn, Theya. You look hot." His words slurred. His eyes zeroed in on her chest for too long before meeting her eyes.
She blushed, but it wasn't from his gentlemanly compliments.
My jaw hardened. "Arthur, did you come over here for a reason?"
"Yeah, I actually wanted to ask if you two were lesbos."
Her hand squeezed mine tight and I knew she was uncomfortable without a doubt.
I stepped forward so I was in his face. "What's it got to do with you?"
He took a few shaky steps back. He shook his head and turned his gaze on Theya. "I'm sorry. I've been drinking."
That much was obvious.
He turned with sad eyes. "My bad." He stumbled forward.
I looked to Theya. She looked on the brink of tears. "Theya, are you okay?" I squeezed her hand.
She nodded, a single tear spilled onto her pale cheek that made my heart hurt. "I thought he was nice."
I sighed, knowing she had to go through this sometime. "Arthur is a flirt when he's sober. Alcohol can make you do things you regret."
"Theya," A guy called from behind us.
We turned to see a tall dark and handsome drink of water approaching us. He looked at Theya with careful eyes.
"Maxie?"
My eyes went to her. Who was Max? She didn't tell me about a Max.
He stopped in front of her, not hesitating a second to pick her up in his well defined arms. I couldn't tear my eyes away from him as he hugged her like he hadn't seen her in years. She pulled away eventually and gazed at him with curiosity.
"What are you doing here? When your parents said you were looking for other tribes I thought I'd never see you again." She sounded sad.
He cracked a relieved grin that dazzled me. "You can't get rid of me that easily, Theya bean."
I gave her a look. Theya bean? Did I want to know?
She playfully punched his shoulder. "Don't call me that, Maxie."
He grinned at her. "Deal, only if you stop calling me Maxie."
She shifted, looking up at him with curious eyes. "Max," She glanced back at me. "Oh, this is Octavia. She's from the sky."
His impressed eyes landed on me. "From the sky, huh?"
I nodded. "That's what they like to tell people."
Theya laughed. "She's one of us at heart. Very badass. She was Indra's Second."
"Wow, you've been busy."
I shrugged. "So how do you two know each other?"
Theya grinned his way. "Maxie and I used to be betrothed. Against our will I might add, but that didn't stop us from becoming friends. The wedding kind of became indefinite what with them leaving and all. I mean, who wanted to be married at fifteen, right?"
"How long are you staying?" I asked.
He shrugged. "I don't know, probably a while. We have some stories to tell."
"Veida!" Someone yelled.
Without a second thought my hand went to my weapon and I yanked it out, my eyes searching the dark woods. I made sure Theya was behind me.
"There!" Someone shouted.
I was oddly the only one with a weapon, which was really backwards if you ask me, so I rushed forward. A guy grabbed a little boy. The boy fell to his knees as they beat him.
"Stop!" A familiar voice yelled.
My heart froze in my chest as he came into view. The battered boy much similar to how he was after he'd been tortured by the Grounders.
"Okteivia, frag em op!" Someone yelled.
I yanked him behind me and drew my weapon forward. "Emo laik friends, no won harms em!" I pulled him along with me. "Ge em?
They stared at me with wide eyes.
"Chon laik emo?" A girl stepped forward.
I grabbed the boy from their hands and pulled them both along. Theya met my eyes. "I'm taking them to your mother."
She nodded and followed. Max joined us.
A/N: Sorry for the long wait. Hoped yall liked it :)
