Disclaimer: Mash-up. I merged my favorite book as a kid with my favorite book as an adult. The basic premise is from Elizabeth Cadell's 1955 "The Lark Shall Sing," while the characters and setting are from Charlaine Harris' Southern Vampire Mysteries. If it's a swear word or kind of twisted, it's my influence.


Chapter Twenty-Nine: Jason the Disciplinarian

So busy were the elder Stackhouses with their working visit with the Du Rones, they were slow to realize that the younger three had not, in fact, made it back to the house in time to visit with Mike and Jane.

Perturbed by the fact that they failed to heed his request, Jason decided that they'd be grounded, no matter what their story was. He was the head of the household now. They needed to respond to him and not flout his authority. He tried to reach Hoyt on his cell, but there was no answer.

Goddamn ATT, Jason sighed.

They finally showed up a quarter after six o'clock—at least they made it in time for dinner, Jason thought ruefully—looking none the worse for the wear. Long Shadow made a barking entrance but the kids were too quiet. Much too quiet. Usually they were loud and raucous. They just seemed guilty. They'd definitely been up to something. If they didn't come clean on their own, he'd have to get it out of them. He'd better not let it slide. He didn't want Sook to realize it and make them come clean. He really needed to establish himself as the one in charge. For all their sakes. If Sookie didn't think he could handle the kids—that they wouldn't respond to him as a disciplinarian—then that was all the more fuel to fight the keeping the house idea. She'd suggest the idea of a new school for Ame, maybe one for Hoyt and she might take Hunter back with her to Dallas. Jason smirked. He knew the boys didn't care much for Bill. Threatening that they might have to live with Bill if they didn't behave might very well be enough of a motivator, but he didn't think it fair to use Bill in that way. The man was set to marry his sister and become his brother-in-law, after all.

Jason decided to meet them out in front of the house. He'd prefer to have this out with them without Sookie nearby.

"Hey, guys, Ame," Jason greeted them as he stepped out onto the porch, shutting the front door behind him.

Smart enough to realize they were up shits creek, the three of them stopped at the bottom of the porch Shadow ran around to the back of the house, chasing a bird's shadow on the ground.

"Hi, Jase." This from Hoyt.

"Hey Jase." This from Hunter.

"Hey." This from Amelia.

"I told you three to be back well before this. Uncle Mike and Aunt Jane were here to visit you too and youmissed them."

The kids exchanged slightly guilty looks. There was also a silent communication to figure out who of the three of them would handle this. Hoyt seemed to be the designated spokesperson.

"Jase, you told us to be back for dinner. We figured that was the time you wanted us back. Sorry we didn'tvisit more with Uncle Mike and Aunt Jane. We forgot that you wanted us earlier. All we remembered was Pam saying dinner was at six thirty."

Damn if that didn't sound plausible. Fuck.

"Well, I guess," backpedaling already, Jason Corbett Stackhouse, not good, "I can understand that. Easy to mishear. You three were gone all afternoon. It was pretty quiet here. Where'd you head off to?"

Again with the silent communication.

"Truth, I need the truth from you three," Jason looked at each of them in turn. "Seriously, if this staying here is going to work, we—and by that I mean, you three, me, and Tara—need to work together. You three are older now. I know Sookie pretty much raised you and you were used to listening to her—or not. But now, I need you to listen to me and Tara. Like we're your parents. Or it ain't gonna work. Got me?"

Amelia looked guilty. Hoyt seemed on the verge of tears, while Hunter's mouth kept opening and Hunter glanced at Hoyt and Amelia and burst out with—

"We got a lift to Hotshot! I told 'em about that friggin a-hole Cal Myers breaking into the tree house and graffitiing it all up. We decided to teach him a lesson, not to mess with us ever again. Jase, we had , he'd do it again. That kid's an animal. Those Hotshot kids are crazy, always runnin' in packs. Wecouldn't let him get away with it. Like a pride thing."

Jason let out a breath. He'd actually figured it would have something to do with Cal Myers. He may nothave seen much of his siblings in the past four years, but he'd pretty much got them pegged. He hoped he wouldn't have to deal with Cal's stepdad, Cal Norris. Dude was strange.

"Okay, so who'd you get a ride with?"

"Uh, we used Hoyt's cell to call Terry and he picked us up and brought us out there."

At least they weren't out and out hitching rides with strangers. Terry could be trusted. To a point. Not enough to assert good behavior on a bunch of revenge-driven kids. But he could be trusted to deliver them safely to execute their plans for vengeance. "How'd you get back?"

"Terry waited for us and brought us back," Hoyt answered.

"Listen. It's good that you didn't hitch a ride with a stranger. I take it that when you first called Terry you knew he'd offer to take you out there and wait to bring you back?"

Nods all around.

"Yeah," Jason continued, "because after Sookie lit into the three of you the other night, I know you couldn't possibly be so dumb as to think you'd get away with pulling the riding-with-strangers thing again. 'Cause if you do that, you don't have to wait for Sookie to put you all in sleep-away schools. I'll do it myself to teach you some good sense. Get me?"

"Yes, sir," Hoyt responded. Amelia and Hunter nodded.

"So, now that you got that off your chest, what the hell did you do to Cal?"

Amelia cleared her throat. "I, uh, put a spell on him."

Jason's eyes widened to saucers. Oh, fuck. "Ame, you telling me you brewed up some of your witchcraft and you put a spell on him?"

"Yep," she looked away towards the cemetery and then turned to meet her older brother's eyes.

"Well," Jason ran his fingers through his hair, "that's just great." Jason didn't really believe his sister could perform the dark arts, but he knew she did believe and the younger boys probably believed. Chances are Cal believed and they'd be hearing from Cal's parents soon enough. "What was the spell, Ame?"

"That he'd take on his true form at the next full moon," she replied seriously.

"Ah," Jase shook his head, "better and better. What would that be? His true form?"

"Well, Jase, that's not how the spell works. I don't tell him what the form is. He'll just take on his true form, come the next full moon." She started to giggle. "Hunt's got a theory."

"Oh, Jase, that Cal's nothing but a big pussy!" Hunter deadpanned. "He'll be turning into one soon enough, and everyone'll know. Thanks Ame!" Hunter high-fived his sister.

Jason knew it was wrong, but he couldn't stop the snicker when he heard Hunter's theory. Hoyt snorted, while Hunter's features remained expressionless. Not quite though. Jason could detect a hint of amusement. This was not good.

"Hunter, Hoyt, Amelia," Jason let out a breath, "you three are going to have to apologize to Cal."

"No, Jase!" Hunter cried. "Jase, he's a jerk. He messed up the tree house. He broke in and messed it up. He's a criminal!"

"No way!" This from Amelia.

"Uh, well, it was pretty fucked up what he did." This from Hoyt.

"Listen," think Stackhouse, "you suspect that he's the one who did it, but you don't actually have proof. Do you?" He looked pointedly at each of them. They shook their heads. "Okay, so, it's your word against his but there's no proof. Right?"

"Right," this from Hunter. "So, now, what you did today," Jase realized how hard out-talking his younger siblings was, "you put this hex—"

"Spell, not a hex," Amelia corrected.

"Yeah, this spell on him, and you did it at his house. Was his mother there? Anyone?"

Amelia, Hoyt, and Hunter exchanged looks. Finally Hunter answered. "Yeah, that no-good bitch of a sister of his, Tanya, was around the house. She ignored us though. She probably knows what a little douche he is. She'll probably laugh herself silly first time he goes 'meow,' and goes to town licking himself." Hunter cracked up, with Hoyt and Amelia following suit.

"No, Hunt," Jason shook his head. "Listen, you three got to apologize to Cal. Amelia you got to tell them you were playing with him and that you're not really a witch—"

"Jason! That's not fair!" Furious, Amelia's eyes were blazing.

Jesus H. Christ, she'd never looked more like Sookie, even with the goth hair, Jason thought. "Ame," play it hard, Stackhouse. "You want to live in Bon Temps or we find you another school to go to? If I can't get you to agree to this, then there's really no choice. You get that?"

Amelia looked on the verge of tears.

"Ame, I'm sorry. Really. This has nothing to do with your skills," in fact, should he make her rescind the spell, just in case? What the fuck? Did he really just think that? What the hell is he getting himself into with this? It's one thing to take care of three kids, but his siblings were borderline whack jobs. Maybe reverse psychology? "Seriously, Ame, I need you to reverse the spell. We need to not use your skills…uh…for this sort of thing. We should…save it…you know? For when it's really needed. This little prick, Cal, well, it's a waste of your power. All we got to do is let his folks know what he's been up and tell him if he does it again, we're gonna get Sheriff Dearborn involved and press charges."

"But, Jase, how're we gonna catch him?" This from Hunter.

"Well," Jase thought for a minute. "How about we install a security camera pointed at the tree house?" Never mind, there's no security on the house, which is rarely locked when the place is occupied, but yeah, let's put a super motion detector security camera on a tree house. Lost in his train of thought, Jason failed to realize momentarily that his words had actually shut them all up. He glanced at the three kids. "Well? What ya say?"

"Good idea," Amelia replied first. "Okay. I agree. No spells." She seemed to be placated on the rescinding the spell thing. Jason made a mental note to talk to Sook about the witchcraft thing.

"Jase, yeah, that's a cool idea," Hoyt responded thoughtfully. "Surprised I didn't think of that. Felipe installed some cameras at Aunt Linda's. He told us not to tell her. I think one's in her bathroom."

Jesus. Ew. Hoyt did not just tell him that Aunt Linda's baby-daddy installed hidden cameras in the bathroom, did he? Those boys are NOT going back to live with that pervert. Christ. Jason made another mental note to talk to Sookie. Maybe they should be looking to get custody of Baby Hadley while they're at it. Fucking disgusting pervert.

"Okay, Jase," Hunter looked out towards the cemetery. Kid could be a little creepy when he got that far-off look. "We'll apologize. Ame'll take back the spell. But we tell him not to ever set foot in the tree house again. We set up the camera—but we gotta do it soon! Like now! And," he shook his head, "if he does it again and somehow we don't get him in trouble with the Sheriff, then Ame casts the spell. Deal?"

"Hunter, I'm not going to agree to that," Jason gave his youngest brother his most stern look. "I'll agree that if he does it again and we don't get him in trouble with the Sheriff, we'll talk again and come up with something else. I promise we won't let it go. Agreed?"

"Yep," Hunter nodded.

"All right. You guys hungry?"

"Yeah!" All three of them clamored.

"Well, that's good then. Dinner's up soon. But someone's got to go get that slow-witted dog. He's probably out back being outfoxed by a snail."

The three kids ran around to the back of the house calling for Long Shadow. Jason sat on the front steps for a few more minutes, readying himself to go back in the house. He needed his 'game face' back before going inside and facing Sookie.

He wondered how people did it. How did they manage to be parents and stay one step ahead of their kids? Somehow Sook had it down. She knew never to trust the three of them. And she somehow made 'em slightly afraid of her. Sure, it didn't make much of a difference, but every bit helped. Even with Tara, he felt that they were outnumbered and outwitted by the kids. He found his mind wandering back to the earlier discussion about keeping the house.

Well, its good Eric'll be around part of the time. Maybe he can get Pam out here too. She's good with Amelia. Maybe Maxine'll decide to move down here. Weather's a helluva lot better here than New York. And the fuckin' politics up there makes Louisiana seem wholesome. Yeah, he thought, maybe with the five of us, we stand a chance of reining in the kids.


AN: Still Saturday. Nearing the end. Sort of. LOL. Anyway, how'd you think Jason did with disciplining the kids? Remember, its new to him. He'll likely get better at it.