Her heart was aching, her blood cold, she felt her entire body shiver and every quick movement made her feel on edge. Every breath she took felt as if it was tearing rips in her lungs. If not for the adrenalin running through her bloodstream, she would not have been able to keep her resolve and do what needed to be done. She had to find him. Besides her was Alistair, who was both determined and kind. He was a true king in Marian's opinion. Not afraid to get his hands dirty, did what was in the interest of all his people not just the nobles. An advocate for the innocents and oppressed. During his rule he had done a lot to help both elves and mages to give them back their rightful place as equals of society. Yet with all his responsibilities he went out of his way to help those he considered friends and had not hesitated a second to help Marian find Anders. He could have let his guards help her, but he had insisted to help himself. It was not hard to see why Anna Amell had fallen deeply in love with him. Even in the midst of her own worries, Marian wished that someday they might be together, without the charade currently applied to both their lives. As they searched the camps Marian had asked Aveline to join them. For some reason Aveline seemed to be pondering something, but Marian was too preoccupied to ask what it was. All she could see, think and feel was Anders. Tensions became even higher when a soldier informed them that he had seen a man by Anders' description being dragged away by what appeared to be templars. Without a moment's hesitation Marian turned around and stormed off towards the templar camp. Alistair and Aveline followed right behind her, fearing all the while that she would do something drastic. And they were right. Marian all but charged through the templar camps and went straight for Knight-commander Cullen's tent. The men guarding the tent tried to stop her and grabbed her arms. With the finesse only a rogue possessed she twisted herself free. She knocked down the two templars and went inside roaring.
"Cullen!"
Cullen got up from his cot and looked wide eyed and startled at Marian.
"Champion?"
"Where is he you son of bitch?!" She grabbed his shirt by the collar and dragged his face down to her eyelevel. All the blood vanished from her fingers turning them completely white as her fingernails tore through the fabric. Cullen could feel her heavy breathing on his face and at this moment a mabari at his throat would have seemed less intimidating. Aveline and Alistair entered the tent right after. Aveline got up behind Hawke and placed a hand on her shoulder.
"Hawke... calm down, this is not helping."
Cullen looked at Marian and was more stunned than frightened. This was one person he had never expected to see again. Marian looked into his eyes with eyes so full of rage it almost caused him physical pain to look at her. He heard another rip tare through his shirt.
"Hawke, be reasonable. This will not help him." Aveline tried again.
At the sound of her friend's voice Marian's eyes slowly softened. Aveline was right of course. This would not help her to get to Anders any faster. She let go of Cullen. He adjusted his shirt and cleared his throat. The two knocked over templars charged in, but Cullen dismissed them. An act that puzzled both Marian and Aveline. Alistair adjusted his hood. He had no interest in having his identity exposed. Sometimes he missed the days travelling through Ferelden during the blight. The freedom to do what he believed was right without having to worry about foreign relation or nobles reactions. Most of all he missed Anna and he knew what Marian must have been feeling at this moment. It reminded him too much of the time Anna had been caught and imprisoned by Logain's soldiers.
"Now, Champion, what may I help you with? I thought you had left Kirkwall far behind. I had not thought you reckless enough to return."
"Where is he?" From the tone of her voice you could still hear the rage poisoning every word. Cullen looked at her with confusion.
"Where is who?"
"Anders!" She spat, the deadly venom echoing through the tent.
"I haven't seen him since that day at the Gallows. I had assumed he was with you." He replied surprised. Seeing the sincerity in his eyes Hawke sank back into a chair. Despair threatened to take away her sanity and go on a murderous rampage through the entire camp. Her mental state was becoming as fragile as Anders' and Justice's, though she was not damage by vengeance, but fear.
"You knew he wasn't dead then?" Aveline asked.
"When we found the corpse in that warehouse I recognized it wasn't Anders. It did however fool the other templars who was not as familiar with him as I was."
"Why then not inform the chantry or the other templars? They seem to believe he is dead." Aveline continued and Cullen sighed.
"When you left we were desperately trying to restore order, but without much success. When we found that body I was left with two options. Telling people that the man responsible for starting all of this had escaped with his life and I had let him go. I feared that would only further encourage the mages left in Kirkwall. On the other hand letting people believe that he was dead by the hands of the templars might make the mages act on the side of caution. And then there was the matter of the Champion. I owe you an apology. You warned me that Meredith was going mad, yet I refused to listen. You were also the one who tried to encourage me to negotiate with the mages. Had I listened to you then, maybe this war could have been prevented."
"I doubt it." Marian said sadly and Cullen nodded.
"Even so I owed you, as did Kirkwall. I let people believe that Anders was dead in the hopes that you would not be hunted so relentlessly. Vael however was not convinced."
"I know. That is why I came back to Kirkwall, to prevent him from harming the city, but now Anders..." She lost her breath as her heart ached.
"He has gone missing. Do you know if any of your templars have caught an apostate this evening?" Alistair continued.
"No, but very few of the templars are still under my command. Most have abandoned the Chantry as I am sure you are aware. Any of these groups might have taken him, though they normally kill mages on sight rather than keep them captive. Especially if they knew who he was."
"Then all is lost... I failed him." Marian said as her voice croaked.
"Hawke, I might know where he has gone." Aveline turned to her friend, who looked up at her with confusion and a bit of anger.
"Then why haven't you said so? Never mind, where is he?" She replied angrily.
"I wanted to be sure before alarming you any further. He told me that if you couldn't work things out with Sebastian he was going to turn himself over."
"And you let him?!" She all but shouted as she got up.
"It was the right decision. You know this as well as I."
"Goodbye Cullen." Marian said sternly as she walked out of the tent every step intensified by her anger. Aveline and Alistair ran after her. She didn't stop until someone grabbed her by the arm as she entered the Ferelden camp. She almost punched the person holding her arm, but in the last minute realised that it was Varric.
"Andraste's dimpled butt cheeks, Hawke. What's going on?"
"Varric... I'm sorry. Anders is missing and he might... he went over to... oh Varric." Marian fell down on her knees and let out a sob. Varric looked at Aveline hoping for some answers.
"Anders might have turned himself over to Sebastian." Aveline explained.
"Great ancestors. A dwarf turns his back for two minutes... Listen Hawke, we will go after him. There is no way we are going to let Choir boy get Blondie. Come on snap out of it." Varric placed both hands on her shoulders and she looked up at him. She dried her tears and her vague stare was replaced with one of determination.
"Of course. I'm sorry."
"We better hurry." Alistair said as he helped her to her feet.
They walked silently along the outskirt of the camps over to Sebastian's army camp. The prisoners were held in the middle of the camp and getting in unnoticed would be more than difficult. Thankfully it was now late at night and only patrols were up. This lowered the chances of getting discovered, but they still had to be very careful. Patience was not Marian's strong point at the moment. She knew that every moment counted at the chances of Anders being dead were already high. The thought of losing him left her breathless and for a moment she felt the same guilt and pain wash over her as when her mother died. The anxiety of going through this camp felt exactly like going through Quentin's lair, looking for clues to her mother's whereabouts only to discover she was too late. A piece of Marian died at the thought alone. She could not lose him. Damned Aveline, knowing what he was planning and not saying a word, because it was right and just. Maker she had come to hate the word justice. So often had she heard it being twisted by people who made it suit their own purpose. Anders was the only person she had heard ever admitting that he could no longer differentiate between justice and vengeance. Others claimed they knew what it was and used it as they saw fit. Justice had become a perverted term, disfigured by humanity like the Andrastian religion. Now the word justice left a bitter taste in her mouth. She did no longer care for justice and did not want it to be applied to her or her actions. She would much rather show mercy and forgive than be given personal justice. All she cared for was the people she loved, it was all that mattered. Anders and Justice would have been glowing and scolding her at this admission, but right now she would give anything to just be able to have that argument. She had to save him. She could not be too late.
They had finally made it to the middle of the camp, sneaking past the guards. She silently thanked Tallis for teaching her how to throw stones to redirect the guards. They found the prison, that looked almost like a pen and saw that it was mostly empty. For all his talk of mercy it seemed that Sebastian did not take prisoners. Varric poked Marian on the shoulder and pointed to the middle of the prison. She sighed with relief when she saw a blonde man tied to a pole inside the prison. He was still alive. Unfortunately Sebastian appeared before they could try and rescue him. Marian almost jumped forward, but Alistair stopped her and silenced her with his hand. She knew the look in his eyes. Only a few hours ago they had made a deal with the prince that many lives depended on. As much as this hurt, they could not afford to compromise this agreement. Marian wiggled desperate to save her love and Aveline had to help Alistair hold her. Seeing her struggle so made Avelie's heart break. They held her so tightly that there had to be bruises afterwards. To make her calm down Varric loaded Bianca and aimed at the back at the princes neck. If he made the slightest move to indicate that he was going to kill Anders, Bianca would pierce his neck with a deadly kiss. Sensing her calming down Aveline and Alistair let go of her. Instead they started to listen.
"... I tried to create a world worth saving. You could not begin to imagine the injustices of this world." Anders said angrily.
"The gravest injustice of this world was murdering a good woman of faith! Not only that, but then Hawke let you go free! I don't know how you forced yourself upon Hawke, but I will not let this madness continue." Sebastian spat.
"I did not force myself upon her! I love her! You can't possibly imagine what that is." Anders said between grinding his teeth, to which Sebastian only gave disgusted chuckle of disbelief.
"Ha! I hardly believe that. The Hawke I knew was kind, wise, good and righteous. Why would she let a murderer walk free willingly?"
"Because she is all of the things you just mentioned. She is a far better person than you and I, Sebastian. She is not blinded by hatred like us. Where we hate, she loves. That is what guides her actions, love for all of us... for me." Anders bowed his head and Sebastian looked at him and for just a moment he understood. Anders was right about Hawke. Elthina had always encouraged Sebastian to follow Hawke's example, despite her lacking interest in the chantry. She had always showed and encouraged mercy whenever she could. She only killed when absolutely necessary and even then you could see the remorse in her eyes with every life she took. For a soldier who had spent the most of her adult life as defender you would have thought her becoming use to taking lives. But she never did.
"What you did is unforgivable. You killed the most beloved servant of the Maker and destroyed his house. They need to be avenged and be given justice. I cannot show you mercy, Anders. Not even for her." Sebastian replied with a hint of remorse in his voice.
"I understand... Whatever you do just do it."
"I will have you executed tomorrow. The world must see that no one who defiles the Maker and his servants will go unpunished."
As Sebastian turned and walked away Marian released the breath she had been holding. She thanked whatever force in Thedas that had made Sebastian so determined to defend the Maker publicly. Perhaps Sebastian did not truly know the will of the Maker after all. When there was only two guards left outside the prison Varric exchanged the arrow for a mismatic bomb, knocking both guards and Anders unconscious from the gas. Varric and Marian ran to the prison helping each other unlocking the many locks. When the gate opened Marian ran to Anders and dropped to her knees before him.
"Love..." She whispered and kissed the still unconscious man. Varric handed her some smelling salt and Anders awoke abruptly as she used it. She quickly kissed him in order to keep him from making a loud noise. When she retreated from the kiss he gave her a roguish grin.
"Well, this is embarrassing. I never thought of myself as a damsel in distress." He smiled.
"The mage who is afraid of spiders, darkness and enclosed spaces? Of course not." She remarked sarcastically as she gave him a smile that brought warmth to his heart. She kissed him again while Varric was behind the pole releasing Anders from the various shackles.
"You bloody idiot. What did you turn yourself in for?" She scolded.
"I didn't. After you left I was too nervous about what would happen to you. I decided I needed some air and went for a walk. Unfortunately my mind was so preoccupied that my subconscious led me directly to the outskirts of Sebastian's army. I think Sebastian must have been expecting that I would not be far behind you. As I waited for you to return, I was knocked unconscious with a poison dart of some sort. There was nothing I could. I'm so sorry my love."
As soon as the last shackle was removed Anders leapt forward and gave her an almost brutal kiss. Marian couldn't help but smile.
"Are you so happy to see me?" She teased.
"I'm always happy to see your face, but it seems particularly lovely right now." He smiled.
"And as always the handsome dwarf and his beautiful crossbow gets overlooked." Varric faked offense.
"I'm sorry Varric, would you like a kiss Bianca as well?" Anders teased and Varric feigned a terrified look and held Bianca close to him.
"Don't worry, baby. I will not let his lips touch you."
"Just get up and let us get out of here." Aveline hurried.
"I am definitely on board with that." Alistair agreed.
They hurried out of the camp and back to the Ferelden camp. Thankfully Sebastian, Cullen and Alistair had signed the treaty earlier that night and could not back away from it now. This incident would not affect the treaty unless it could be proven that the Fereldens had been involved with freeing Anders and there had been no witnesses to their rescue. It was not likely that Cullen would betray them to Sebastian after the confession he gave them earlier. Admitting that Anders was still alive and had been captured by Sebastian's men would only damage Cullen and the control he had left. Marian and Anders left that very night, but managed to take the things they had to leave behind in Kirkwall with them. Varric had kept them safe for them and collected them before Gamlen and Charade had moved into the Amell mansion. Marian never wanted to see Kirkwall again. She had lost everything that was truly important to her in that damned place. The only thing it had given her was the man at her side and he was the only thing that had been worth having in Kirkwall.
-OOO- The next morning -OOO-
"What do you mean the prisoner is missing?!" Sebastian roared at the nervous guard.
"Someone knocked the guards unconscious and freed him, your grace."
"Send some men to the Kirkwall harbour immediately and ask if anyone has seen a man by that description. I will follow shortly with my most trusted men." Sebastian ordered as he quickly packed. The guard bowed and did as he was told. Anders was not escaping justice again. There could be no peace.
