A/N – so I was lucky enough to catch the super sneaky First Look episode that aired on Monday. No spoilers but it was AWESOME and now I am even MORE excited about Season 3. Only ten more days!
And credit to EarlyMorningWriter for the term "emotional toddler" – which I love.
x
x
Chapter 29 – Ken (Tex) Nolan
"I think it's time for us to go."
Tex had heard Rick use that tone of voice only once before, back in Missouri, when the Immunes had attempted to infect an entire campus full of people with the virus before the team had stopped them.
"Is everything okay?" Nicole's voice quivered, her eyes fixed on Rick as he yanked open the door to the jeep with only the tersest of goodbyes.
Tex exchanged a look with Wolf, who gave Tex a quick nod before turning on the charm with the young woman. "Nothing to worry about, darling. We'll be back in the morning to pick you up and Rick can explain everything."
As he slid into the driver's seat, Tex turned to take a good look at Rick. The kid was pale, his lips pressed firmly together, his arms crossed tightly over his chest. Whether or not Rick was willing to admit it, the man outside had shaken him, and Tex could think of only one person who would have prompted this extreme of a reaction.
"That your dad?" Tex asked, not bothering to beat around the bush.
"Yeah."
Although Tex had been fairly certain of the man's identity, Rick's curt response – so out of character for the generally good-natured sailor – was chilling. Adjusting the rear view mirror, Tex watched the man as he stood on the sidewalk indecisively, staring at the jeep. There was something about his eyes, about the way he looked at Rick, that resonated with Tex. It was an expression that he was all too familiar with.
One filled with guilt.
Tex could see Wolf heading back towards the vehicle, Nicole having been escorted safely into the house. "Sure you don't want to hear what he has to say? He might be able to explain some things. "
"I don't need any explanations to know what he did. He left one day and he didn't come back. But it didn't matter. I had my mom and she was better than ten dads."
Tex knew he was pushing too hard, too fast, but he couldn't let it go at that. They were leaving Dayton in the morning and, as they all were far too well aware, there was no knowing what tomorrow would bring. This might be Rick's last chance to make peace with his father. "People make mistakes, Rick."
Silently adding, I certainly did.
Five Months Ago
Tex knew from the way Kat was fiddling with her bracelet that she had something on her mind, and it didn't take a genius to figure out that it was probably Claire. He had tried to talk to Kat about her mother a few times, but Kat had always changed the topic, and Tex hadn't pressed the issue. Honestly, he'd been relieved. Just the thought of Claire being gone from the universe made his chest ache. Talking about it was a thousand times worse. Although he and Claire were separated for more years than they were together, there had been something comforting about knowing she was out there, happily living her life – even if that life hadn't included him. And if it was that hard for him to face the reality that Claire was dead, he could only imagine how difficult it was for Kat to consider a life without her mother.
"I miss her too," Tex said finally.
Kat looked up, startled, and a sheen of tears appeared in her eyes. "She knew you would come for us. She kept saying we just needed to hold out a little while and then you would be there and everything would be okay."
Tex recalled his last conversation with Claire, days before communications had gone down for good. He had made her promise to take Kat and get as far away from people as she could. She had told him of her plan to go to Cort's farm and wait for him there. It sounded as good as anywhere else to Tex. He had hoped to grab a small boat and head for the Florida coast, but then the prisoners they freed turned on them and destroyed the boats, deadset on making sure that none of the guards escaped, and trapping Tex in Cuba. The Nathan James had been his only way off the island, but Tex couldn't help but feel like he should have found another way. One that would not have taken months.
"I'm sorry that I wasn't there when your mom died," Tex replied.
"Rachel said that you left them in Baltimore and that you were headed off to find us, but you came back." Kat look straight at him and Tex could do no more than nod. How could he explain that he had chosen to go back to help those he knew were alive, rather than look for his own flesh and blood? "Rachel said that you saved her and Kara from Mrs. Granderson."
Tex wondered exactly what Rachel had told Kat. He couldn't imagine that she had gone into detail. He hoped not, anyway. Kat was far too young to be exposed to that sort of depravity. Of course, age didn't mean that much anymore. The things that Kat has seen and done since the virus struck had aged her far more than her fourteen years. "I just helped the team along."
"Saving Doctor Scott was really important. Without her we wouldn't have the cure," Kat replied, but Tex noticed that she glanced to the side.
"Not more important than you mother," he said firmly.
"If you hadn't gone back, she might not have died."
A lump formed in Tex's throat. "I know."
He couldn't lie to Kat and tell her that he would have made a different decision if he had known that she and Claire were alive – because he wouldn't have. He couldn't have left without warning them. Not after finding out what the Nathan James was walking into. That wasn't who he was.
"But Cort was there and he couldn't save her. So it probably wouldn't have made any difference," Kat said sadly.
Tex opened his mouth, but then stopped. There was no reason to tell Kat all of the reasons why things might have been different if it had been him, rather than Cort, at the house the night Claire died. Because none of it mattered. None of it would bring Claire back. And none of it would make Kat feel better. That guilt was his burden to carry alone.
Kat smiled at him through her tears. "I'm just glad you found me."
"And I will never leave you again."
Present
Tex could tell from the way that Rick's jaw was moving that his comment had not been well received. "It's different with you and Kat. You were a soldier. You had to leave. And you didn't leave her or your wife without enough money to eat or buy clothes."
Tex had known Rick was raised by a single mom, but he hadn't realized before now what a Grade A asshole the kid's father was. Looking at it from that perspective, Tex could be considered a model absentee ex-husband and father. He had never fought Claire over the support issue, continuing to have his checks deposited into her bank account even after the divorce. Claire had conscientiously opened a separate account in his name where she transferred the balance of the funds after pulling out what she needed (and providing Tex with a full accounting, which he never bothered to look at), but Tex rarely used any of it. In his line of work, most expenses were covered by his employers, and the ones that weren't, well, Tex's tastes weren't exactly high-end.
"I can't say why he did that Rick, but if you want to know the answers, now is your chance. When was the last time you saw him anyway?"
Rick scowled. "I was ten. I don't even know why he's here. He has a new family now."
Tex's already sub-crustacean view of Miller Senior sunk even lower.
"He probably wanted to make sure you were alive," Tex finally offered.
"Well now he knows," Rick snapped. "So he can go back to his life and I can get back to mine. One that does not include him."
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
"What do you think they are doing?" Danny asked as he and Tex lounged against the Jeep waiting for Rick. They had arrived to pick up Nicole thirty minutes before and, to the shock of absolutely nobody (except possibly Rick), David Miller had been waiting, shivering, on the sidewalk (apparently banned from either the house or the porch by Nicole). Nicole had appeared apprehensive about David's presence, but Rick had said something that calmed her nerves and she had settled inside the warmth the jeep with Alisha and Danielle while Rick and David had disappeared around the side of the house.
"Well, they could be practicing for a staring contest, but I'm going to bet that they are talking."
Next to him Danny snorted.
"Commodore say anything about what's going on with a battle of the presidents?" Tex asked after a minute.
"Samuel has agreed to an election. Turns out there's some technicality where he might not have been sworn in by a judge. So even though he was ahead of Michener in line, it might not matter."
"Commodore figure that out on his own?" Tex was impressed.
"Actually, it was the nutjob's wife – the one who shot up the processing center. Remember how she was harassing the hell out of the Norfolk City Council about holding her husband without trial? Turns out she isn't that bad of a lawyer."
"They let him out?" Tex was stunned by the idea that Tom Chandler, who hadn't been willing to relax a single rule for Rachel Scott – who killed the worst criminal on the planet - might pardon a man who had held hundreds of people hostage and was responsible for the deaths of at least two.
Danny snorted. "God, no. Even she isn't stupid enough to want him on the streets. She cut some deal with Slattery for him to get counseling and a better room and some other stuff she wanted. In exchange, she's Norfolk's new DA and provides the XO with advice on other related issues."
"That figures," Tex replied with a shake of his head. Slattery did have a way of getting things done. Probably because he didn't mind bending a rule or ignoring an order here or there if it got him where he needed to go. "Samuels probably has some sneaky idea to steal the election anyway. He seems like that sort."
"Do we have to vote?" Danny muttered darkly before adding. "Michener asked Milowsky to run with him. Guess he figured that having someone connected to the cure would help his popularity and Doctor Scott turned him down cold."
"Huh." Tex smirked. "Just think, your ex might end up living in the White House."
"Michener also asked Kara to serve as his senior military adviser," Danny added.
Tex whistled. "That's a pretty damn impressive offer. She going to take it?"
"I think she wants to. It's a hard decision, though. St. Louis is landlocked. Not the best place for a Navy officer to be based out of," Danny admitted. "And we just got settled in Norfolk."
Tex considered Danny. Over the last year he had watched younger man mature from an emotional toddler struggling with the very concept of love, to a devoted husband and father. And through it all, Kara's loyalty had never swayed. If anyone could survive a separation, it was those two.
"So long as you don't follow my example, you'll end up fine." Tex grinned as another thought occurred to him. "Any chance of a promotion with that job? Because it would be pretty damn funny to see you saluting your wife."
