Chapter 29

He tossed and turned and finally gave up on sleep altogether. Alex was awake, too. She followed him out to the living room and sat beside him on the couch.

"You need your sleep," he told her.

"Not until I find out what's bothering you."

Bobby frowned and rubbed his face hard with his hands.

"Your partner?"

"No, no… we actually kind of… clicked today." He sighed heavily and took her hand. "There was this kid today… a baby, really. Two years old."

Bobby told her the story of Jeremy and how he couldn't get the boy out of his mind. "Alex, he's orphaned now. His mother was all he had."

"Did he see her die?"

"I don't know." Bobby told her more about the child, and about how, without speaking a word, the kid had stolen his heart. "I just can't stand to think of him, you know… getting lost in the system. I don't want him to fall through the cracks."

"Bobby, what are you saying?"

"Alex, I think you should meet him."

"Bobby, you're just worked up about the case. It was traumatic, for all of you."

"No, Alex. It's this kid. Jeremy. He's special. You have to meet him."

Alex had known Bobby a long time. She'd seen him with kids, and she'd seen him expertly work with them and then hand them over to protective services. She'd never seen him like this. "Okay."

Relieved, he pulled her against him in a hug.

"You'll have to get permission for a visit."

"Newell will never agree to it. She'll spout off something about attachment disorder and say I'm hindering his progress."

"Bobby, is there a chance she would be right about that?"

"No." He sounded completely sure of himself, but he wouldn't meet her eyes. It was Bobby's way of telling a lie.

Alex saw right through it. She understood what was happening. Her husband was asking her to make a new commitment. He was asking her to start a family. And it wouldn't hurt Jeremy to continue to bond with him because Bobby, in his heart, had already made the decision.

"How will you pull it off, then?"

"I got the foster parents' names. I can just look them up."

"Tomorrow?"

He nodded.

She cupped his cheek with her hand. "Just let me know when." Alex leaned in and kissed him, and convinced him to come back to bed.


"Come in," Diane, the foster mother said. Jeremy saw Bobby and rushed to him immediately. Bobby scooped him up and gave him a hug.

Alex smiled at how easily Bobby carried the child. They walked into the foster home and sat down on Diane's couch. "It took him a long time to get over your leaving yesterday. Hopefully, he won't be like that today."

"If he knows I'm coming back, he'll be fine," Bobby told her.

"Detective, be careful about making promises you can't keep. These kids, that kind of thing really hurts them."

"I'm not planning to let him down," Bobby said quietly. He looked into Jeremy's eyes. "Jeremy, this is my wife, Alex." He took the boy's hand and helped him to touch Alex's hand.

"Hello, Jeremy," Alex said with a friendly smile.

"He's not potty trained," Diane announced. "And he hasn't spoken at all. I wonder if he can."

"He understands, though," Bobby said. "He understands everything."

"Maybe he's just not talking because of the shock of it all."

"Will he get therapy?" Alex asked.

"He sees the counselor tomorrow. Then we'll get advised about his needs. Maybe speech therapy, maybe just counseling… who knows?"

"He looks tired," Bobby said. "Did he sleep all right?"

"No. He was very restless. He wouldn't sleep alone. He finally fell asleep after midnight, I think. I'll try and get him to nap this afternoon."

Jeremy yawned and tugged on Bobby's tie. Diane filled them in some more about Jeremy and what she had learned about him in the last 24 hours. A small dog scurried into the room and Jeremy pointed at it, excitement in his eyes.

"Dog?" Alex said to the child. "You see the dog?"

Jeremy smiled at her, and Alex called the dog over. She picked up the dog and petted it, and invited the little boy to pet it, too. He reached out his hand and touched the animal, then pulled his hand back and squealed with delight. All four of them laughed.

Jeremy maintained contact with Bobby, but he scooted halfway to Alex's lap. Already, she could see why Bobby was enamored with this child.

"He really likes you, both of you," she said. "He wouldn't let my husband near him last night. He's very particular about people."

Alex looked up into Bobby's eyes, and silently, they shared a thought.

They made arrangements to come visit again the next day, and Jeremy cried as they were leaving, and even Bobby's promise to return didn't quiet him.

As they got into the car together, Alex glanced over at her husband. He was visibly upset about leaving. "He'll be okay," she told Bobby.

"I know," he said, a little too quickly.

"Even if he was yours, you'd have to leave him sometimes."

"I know that."

She started driving, and gave him a few minutes of quiet to get his emotions in check. When they reached a stoplight, she took his hand. "What's involved in adopting a child from treatment foster care?"

Bobby turned his head and smiled in surprise. "D-do you want to?"

"He's a sweet kid, Bobby."

"But you said you were, you know, done with that dream."

"I never thought it might happen this way."

"Y-you're serious. You really want to?"

Alex squeezed his hand as the light changed to green. "Yeah. I want to."


They filled out the application form and informed Mrs. Newell. Although she wasn't pleased they'd run around her to see Jeremy, she saw from their actions that they sincerely wanted to adopt him. They visited Jeremy every evening.

Alex started looking at their apartment with a more critical eye. "We'll need to get a step stool for the bathroom. And a toddler bed. And maybe a rocking chair. Do you think we have room for a rocking chair?"

"We can make room," Bobby answered. So far, everything was looking good. Jeremy's distant family had no interest in taking him on, and everyone on his treatment team was impressed with Bobby and Alex.

Even Mrs. Newell had come around. They were scheduled to meet with a state lawyer the next day, the first in a series of interviews the state would use to determine if Bobby and Alex would be a suitable family for Jeremy.

They were both nervous about it. As veteran police officers, there didn't seem to be any reason to be concerned, but Bobby was worried that his own family history might have an impact on the decision. Alex was worried that Jeremy's needs as a traumatized child would be considered too much for a career woman, and that somehow her position as a Captain would register as a negative instead of a positive.

Bobby's phone rang, and he went to the kitchen to answer. She knew right away it was a call out. He hung up the phone with a frown. Bobby stared at her, torn about what he had to do. "I'll still go see him," she said with a reassuring tone.

"He'll expect me," Bobby said. "I can't… I have to meet Greg…"

"Bobby, it's your job. If they let us adopt Jeremy, he's going to have to learn that sometimes you have to work."

Bobby nodded. "Maybe I can… c-c-call him."

"I'll call you when I'm with him."

"Y-yeah. Maybe that will help." Goren gathered up his keys and his wallet and threw a jacket on. Alex kissed him before he went out the door.