The Diary of a Queen's Pet
Chapter 29
Author's Notes: Daaaayyyyuuummmm…I'm sorry in advance about this one guys. I'm sure you're not going to be happy with me about this one but I've had this planned from the beginning and we're coming full circle one this piece. Things are bound to change one way or another. As always if you feel so inclined please let me know what you think and I hope you enjoy if you can. I'm working on the new product line for The Nerd Spa today and I'll be messing with things on and off. We're adding a new product as well so be on the lookout for it. I'll post pictures as soon as it's in stock and ready for sale on both. If you haven't checked us out yet, we're on Facebook under The Nerd Spa and we're on Etsy. shop/nerdspa . Other than that…please don't kill me! ~ Scarlette
Did anyone really believe that I would listen to the Queen at that point in time? Of course not; you'd know me well enough to know that I cannot stay away from something that may threaten my way of life. And that of my Queen; Claude had been gone a little over a moon by that point and for the most part he seemed to be doing well in his new role. He would send us what encoded messages he could but they were rare. His life was after all in danger should he be caught.
I paced back and forth in my bedroom; the Queen was meeting with her council and while I could've attended, I was beginning to feel cooped up and caged like I had before I'd fled all those years ago. The Prince was at his lessons and Graham had agreed to watch him while I was tried to work off my energy in the practice field but when that proved fruitless, I came back to my rooms to bathe and try to get myself together.
I ran my hands through my hair twice before I made my decision. I would go to Red's village and I would find Granny. Hopefully she'd find it in her heart to forgive me for all my wrong doings and I could get her out of there before the village was destroyed. It was the least I could do for Red. I owed her that much.
I left my rooms quietly and didn't tell anyone I was leaving. I knew if I mentioned it to Graham he'd tell the Queen. And the Queen had all but forbidden me to leave the castle. I didn't have the trouble that I used to have taking a horse and taking it off the grounds. It wasn't until the wind was blowing through my hair and I noticed the trees were slowly beginning to grow back from the trauma of the fire they'd endured when I'd first left that I think I fully realized what I was doing. I'd left my Queen again when I'd promised her and myself that I wouldn't leave again. Guilt twisted in my gut but I ignored it. I had to do this. I had to protect Granny after I'd let Red die.
I still feel regret over all that years later. I did love Red though I didn't want to admit it at the time. I was still so desperately in love with the Queen that I refused to see what I'd had in front of me. And I was happy even if I didn't want to believe I was. That simple way of life, stealing kisses in between shifts at work in the back store room. Lying in bed before the sun rose, talking sometimes, other times just staying silent and cuddling close especially when it got cold. Red had always been so warm and she'd loved burying her nose in her long dark hair. It was easier to imagine it was the Queen but the scents were different and every time I breathed I'd been reminded that it wasn't the Queen in my arms, it was Red.
And then the guilt would set in for me once again. It seems to be a growing pattern that I find myself falling into with the women I love. I always do something to make myself feel guilt about hurting them in some fashion or another. I rode through the day and night, the guilt tying itself in knots in my stomach with every step that the horse took but I kept on.
I reached the border of Red's village late the next night. I knew the Queen was angry with me for disobeying her but I still pushed on. I hid my horse in the trees; I couldn't let them know I was here if indeed things were as dire as I suspected. I stayed in the woods, waiting until nightfall before I crept up to the small house behind the tavern. Granny had always insisted she keep separate quarters but still stayed close enough that she could get to the tavern should something happen. I could remember nights when I would find Granny sleeping in her rocking chair before the fire with a crossbow in her hands. I missed the simplicity of that time but I had made the decision to leave and I couldn't go back on my word to stay with the Queen. I just hoped she'd forgive me once I returned to her side…hopefully with Granny in tow.
I waited for a bit until I knocked carefully on the window. It opened a few moments later and I was staring down a crossbow. I squeezed my eyes shut as I lifted my hands.
"Granny," I said softly. "It's me…Emma."
"Girl?" Granny lowered the bow, staring at me wide eyed behind her spectacles.
She looked older, I noted, feeling a bit sad by that. She had seemed so ageless before and yet so wise. She offered me a suspicious look before the crossbow came up again.
"How do I know you're Emma?"
"It wasn't common knowledge that I was from the Dark Kingdom." I said softly. "We used to claim that I'd come from the village of Bansworth to the North."
She studied me for a moment before lowering the crossbow. "You left. Red came after you."
I squeezed my eyes shut, "I know. I'm sorry. I couldn't protect her."
Granny cocked her head, "What do you think happened to her girl?"
"She died. The Queen ordered her burned."
The older woman's wrinkled brow crinkled more and I blinked.
"Emma, I don't know where you heard that…"
"I didn't hear it…I witnessed it. She burned her at the stake." I interrupted.
"Emma?" I heard a soft voice behind Granny and my eyes widened.
"Red?"
She stepped forward and pushed Granny out of the way. Her gloved hands cupped my cheeks as I stared up at her with wide eyes. Her smile was bright, her dark hair fell from underneath her red hood and curled on the ends only slightly longer than I remembered. She looked exactly like I remembered as she leaned down and pressed her lips to mine.
"Red, you're alive," I whispered, feeling the lump in my throat only get bigger as tears began to leak from my eyes.
"Why wouldn't I be?"
"Granny said you followed me back to the dark Queen's Kingdom." I offered as she pulled away.
"I did but you were captured and I knew I couldn't get you out on my own. I came back home and Granny and I tried to figure out what we could do to get you out of there. It's taken a while and I'm sorry for that. Granny said she thought you'd be dead by now if the Queen willed it but I had faith that you'd stay alive." She offered me a beautiful smile. "Granny," She asked, looking over her shoulder. Only then did I take in that the older woman was gone. She turned back towards me. "I never got to tell you before you left. But Emma, I love you."
I felt my eyes well up once again. "Oh Red." I said softly.
"I know; I know you don't feel the same."
"I do but…" I trailed off.
She shook her head and pressed her leather-clad finger to my lips. "Don't. It's all right. I understand. I promise." She offered me a sad smile. "She's lucky to have you. I hope you realize that."
"I don't know." I answered honestly. "Red, this rebellion. It has to end. The Queen will see you all burn for this." I pled with her and she shook her head.
"A long time ago something precious was stolen by the Dark Queen from the White Queen. She'll stop at nothing to have it back."
I furrowed my brow before I shook my head. "It doesn't matter. I won't have you and Granny here when her army marches here. You need to get out. Come with me back to the Dark Kingdom. We'll figure it out together. I didn't know you were alive Red."
"I can see that from the shock on your face." She noted.
It didn't really occur to me then what had actually taken place. It wasn't until the shock of seeing Red and feeling her body beside mine as I slept in her bed as I used to that it fully hit me. The Queen had lied to me. For the first time in all our years together, she'd lied. She'd set up "Red's" death and forced me to endure it knowing how it would break me to see my friend in that position.
Anger began to pull in my stomach along with the feeling of betrayal. She'd lied to me and I had done nothing to deserve that. I may have run from her but I didn't deserve that. How could she do that to me and then allow me to get close to her? How could she let me claim her knowing I was making said claim without knowing all the proper facts?
I've never hated the Queen and I never will though in those moments when Red whimpered in her sleep and I pulled her close to me, I wondered if that was as close as I'd ever get to hating her. This feeling of betrayal, of anger, and of having my world shattered by the same woman that had built it up for all this time. I wondered if I should return in those dark moments. Perhaps I should just flee to the White Kingdom, take Granny and Red and live as Red's lover for the rest of my days. It was a nice thought but one I couldn't abide. I'd return to the Queen's side but I wouldn't let her close again or so I'd thought at the time.
I'd never let her betray me like this again. I still don't think I've totally forgiven her even after all this time and as I sit here writing this journal. You once told me never to trust her Graham. And like everyone in my life I didn't listen. I got burned by the fire but I wouldn't let it consume me again. She had a lot to answer for back then and even now. Would I get the answers I sought? I'm sure that thought has crossed your mind as you read these words. I'm not sure what to tell you but like everything in my life it would either be built up or torn asunder by one woman. But this time I vowed that I'd tear her world apart as she continuously did mine.
