Running Up That Hill
By: The Hatter Theory
Chapter 29: How It Mattered To Us
Disclaimer: I don't own the rights to Inu Yasha or anything by Placebo or Kate Bush
A note: Thank you guys for your support when all went haywire, it means a lot. I hope you enjoy!
The children knew something was wrong. Everyone knew something was wrong. But the only adult that seemed to understand was Shinzuru, and he was hiding behind his oath, determined not to break trust with his new daughter.
Of course, there was no distance between the miko and the children, or even the miko and the twins. Or Tenka. Just he and his mother. She was even friendlier with Jaken than she was with him. To say he was displeased with this turn of events was an understatement. His mother however, seemed to be taking it all in stride.
For two weeks, since the day she had thrust him out of her head, there had been no late night training sessions. No conversations. No interruptions of his day. And no touching. Which shouldn't have bothered him, except that she allowed everyone else to touch her. Even the twins were allowed to lounge on her, using her stomach as a pillow while they all watched the children. And more often than not, someone was there, blocking him from touching her. Not that he would have initiated contact of any sort after he had been rudely expelled from the core without explanation.
Biting back a growl as she lay back and let her head rest in Shinzuru's lap, he stood swiftly and stalked away, determined to get away from the silence that had suddenly sprung up between them. He promised himself that her sudden sigh of relief did nothing to him, and the strange feeling in his chest was a result of something, anything else.
The next day, his temper was riding high. He had received news that an envoy from the panther tribe was on it's way, which was strange enough. But added to that, an envoy from the Anyano clan, and he was feeling more than antsy about the seeming coincidence. Shoving the missives aside, he left his study and was heading for the gardens, intent on getting some air and perhaps a run when he saw the miko.
She noticed him at the same moment and paused, only to try and flee a second later.
"Wait," He commanded, and tried not to be hurt by the sudden fear in her eyes. When he finally closed the distance between them, she was looking up at him again.
She was staring at him strangely. It was an almost uncomfortable stare, and for once he found the urge the shift, but resisted. Her normal, almost careless regard had been replaced by something else. Not quite scrutiny, nothing so intent. Her gaze fluttered to him, then away. Confusion and fear warred in her scent, jagged little spikes that ground against his temper.
"Miko, you are agitated." It wasn't a question.
"I'm fine," She whispered, looking down at the floor, feeling more than free to fidget. He almost envied her.
"Why does this Sesshoumaru sense so much fear?" And when had he fallen back into their old speech patterns?
It spiked again, stabbing into her control.
"I'm not afraid."
A blatant lie.
The truth dawned.
"You fear me?" He asked, his eyes widening. Though it would have been gratifying in the past, now it confused him. The woman hadn't been afraid of him since he had promised to protect her. And while her dismissal of his strength had initially been an insult, he had come to terms with it, and accepted it for the compliment it was. For a female to trust any male after her experiences was surprising, and some might even say foolish. But from the moment he had accepted that she trusted him as her alpha, her lack of fear had been strange, but not pressing, not worrying.
But the sudden appearance of fear did not sit well with him. And his question had been more out of shock than anything else. The skittering of anxiety rolled over him, drenching his own senses and only confirming his assumption.
"Why?" He ground out, keeping the leash on his temper. Damn it, her fear was doing nothing to stay his already fraying control on his instincts.
"I'm not afraid of you."
"Your scent-"
"It's not you, okay. You can tell if I'm lying. I'm not afraid of you," She repeated, her eyes doe wide and star bright. The pulse in her throat hammered wildly and for a moment he had a hard time ripping his gaze away from it. Even with his hearing he had a hard time understanding her inflections, but he understood that there was a distinction. She was afraid, and it had to do with him, but she was not afraid of him. At least he thought.
"Explain."
"I can't."
"As your alpha-" True distress hit him in the face, an angry slap in response to his prying.
"Please, don't make me Sesshoumaru. I just can't. It's not a problem, just, please let me handle it on my own," She begged, tears beginning to form and pool in her eyes. Every muscle was tensed beneath her skin, ready for flight. What surprised him was that he was just a poised, ready to chase. Something was wrong with the woman, and she was one of his, his pack, and he should be demanding the truth from her.
But every sign pointed to the fact that if he pressed for the truth, it would only make her worse, and he wasn't sure he could deal with that level of distress without some committing form of brutality, and there was nothing, no source of the problem, that he could release that violence upon.
"This Sesshoumaru will not harm you," He spoke through clenched teeth, though he'd be damned if he let her know that. Suppressing the growl in his chest, he accepted her nod, seeing the sincere acceptance in the gesture. "If someone has brought this distress upon you-"
"No, it's not anyone else. It's just something I have to deal with, okay? I know you're alpha and you got stuck with me, and I'm really sorry. I don't know how it works most of the time, but I do know that this is something I'd have to deal with regardless. Just- I need time."
He nodded, still tense and fighting the urge to demand the truth anyway.
'She keeps her own council, regardless of having an alpha or not. She has always done so, and she includes others when she is comfortable. She is human. It is their way.'
He repeated the reminder of her humanity like a mantra as she bowed once -a new formality, when had she picked that up?- and fled down the corridor. More tension for him to fight, his instincts almost snapping as she rushed away. It would be so easy to give in, chase her down and demand his answers.
Any thoughts of fresh air and a run eluded him now, and he went back to his study, determined to figure out why the envoys were coming from the north and south.
The next afternoon, Kagome was surprised to see Mizu rushing to her, eyes wild and aura flaring erratically. She urged Boufuu into a gallop and met the kitsune at the fence bordering the field. He was breathing deeply as if he had run the whole way.
"What's wrong?" Kagome asked, dismounting fluidly as panic stabbed at her. "Is it the children, are they alright?" She demanded. Mizu nodded, his hands still braced on his knees as he took deep breaths.
"Envoys. It's not good," Mizu sputtered. "Sesshoumaru is furious." Kagome walked beside him, almost running to keep up with the kitsune's long strides.
"What's going on? It's not another war or something, is it?" She demanded breathlessly.
"Worse. The panther tribe and the aosagibi have each sent a woman for their clan and and offer of alliance."
Kagome stopped cold, her stomach suddenly clenching tight as the words sunk in.
"Marriage?" She whispered.
"Yes. And Sesshoumaru's fit to be tied. The situation stinks of something, what with both of them here at once, but he can't figure out what. Hey-" He said, noticing her expression. "Are you alright? I'm sure everything will be fine, he won't stand for this-"
"It's fine. I just never thought about him taking a mate. Silly, I guess. But he wouldn't pick one that didn't like the kids, right?" Kagome asked.
"He won't take one at all until he's good and ready," Mizu snorted. "And it bothers all of us that not one but two clans have decided to presume otherwise and make the offer."
They strode silently into the shiro, Kagome's heart thudding painfully in her chest. Every night since her return she'd been subject to dreams that grew more and more vivid, each one making it harder to face the daiyoukai. Despite Shinzuru's opinion, that she was merely using the face of a male that made her safe- the thought of him mating someone else pricked her heart painfully, clenching it and digging in sharp claws.
When they were outside of his study, Kagome could feel the pure rage roiling inside, barely controlled.
"You go, I'll take care of this," She murmured. Mizu nodded once before bolting, more than eager to escape the ire that threatened to overwhelm him. Kagome slid the door open and shut it silently behind her. Sesshoumaru stood, fists clenched and shoulders tense, his gaze resting squarely on her.
"Mizu told me what was going on," She murmured, going to him. Her arms wrapped around his body, trapping his arms at his sides, not that he was moving them, and her face leaned against his chest.
"You haven't touched me in weeks," He snapped. "Why start now?"
"You need it. Friends help each other out," She answered quietly. After a moment of tense contemplation, his arms were around her, hugging her loosely despite her own grip tightening around him.
"I do not know what to do," He sighed. "Sending them away out of hand is an insult, one that neither I nor they can afford. But I have no wish to take a mate,": He admitted at last. "And their timing is too convenient to be a coincidence."
"So you have to choose between the two?" She asked, heart tripping over it's beat, stumbling and leaving her gasping lightly for air.
"I would have neither," He snarled.
"We'll figure something out," She promised. "It's just another one of those unique problems we'll find a creative solution to," She chuckled. Her words seemed to calm something in him, and the tension seeped out of his body as they stood like that for several minutes.
When the door flew open, they both started violently, only to see Yuugao looking at them with something akin to fury, but much, much deeper. Her gold eye's flashed dangerously as she stalked into the room. Mistaking her ire for their embrace, Kagome tried to pull away, only to have Sesshoumaru's arms tighten around her.
"Tell me that the pathetic creatures sent here are not offers for mating," She snapped, teeth clicking together and grinding against one another.
"They are," Sesshoumaru rumbled.
"That crane is an enemy of our clan, and the cat no better. Send them off," She demanded hotly.
"I cannot, as well you know."
"Then subject them to the trial, trounce them soundly, and get them out of this house!" She barked.
"Trial?" Kagome asked, confused. "What trial?" She asked, looking up to Sesshoumaru, who looked slightly bewildered by the older inu's suggestion.
"Our house has always subjected potential mates to a trial. We accept nothing less than the strongest into the house of the moon. Dear son," She added with venom. "Tell me you were not oblivious when told of these things."
"I never paid any heed," He snapped out, just as harshly. "I did not intend to take a mate for some time."
"Well, this will keep you from having to do so. I will see to it the scroll for the ritual process is found, and I will see to it all is done as it should be. I expect you to be ready on the morrow."
"Tomorrow?" He demanded.
"I don't want those travesties here that long either, but we must abide since you won't throw them out," The inu snarled before leaving the room and slamming the door behind her. Kagome blinked blankly at the door, and then up at Sesshoumaru.
"Well, how's that for a creative solution?" She asked.
"It seems I must engage them in a fight," He muttered.
"At least you'll be able to work off some of your anger," She chuckled. "And it should be over fairly quickly."
He refused to admit that her faith in him warmed his toes.
"So who did they send as potential brides?" She finally asked.
"Harukaze sent one of her sisters. Touran sent her younger sister as well, Shunran." Kagome giggled at the venom in his voice and squeezed him again.
"You know, we could always let them around the kids. I'm sure they'd run screaming into the hills, never to be seen or heard from again," She teased.
"Or you could purify them," He growled. Kagome punched him lightly in the chest.
"They probably don't want to be here anymore than you want them to be. Let's invite them to dinner in the garden."
"Why would you offer such?" He demanded, eyes suddenly blazing with fury.
"Because," She admitted, "I think it would be funny to watch them when they're forced to face one another."
She didn't add that she hoped the combination of competitive behavior and a probable dislike of humans would make them more than unfit in Sesshoumaru's eyes. The easy out provided by his mother felt too easy, and the idea of him mating someone irked her. Chalking it up to her own strange, stupid, dreams, she pulled back and swatted his arm.
"Stop glowering, your face might stick that way."
He smiled brightly, and she shuddered.
"That either. Kami, that's creepy."
"My smile is creepy?" He snorted. "I distinctly remember you asking me to smile before."
"A real smile. That just looks like you're going to kill something, if you haven't already."
"I wonder," He mused aloud. "If I smiled this way at them, perhaps they might reconsider their decision?"
"I wonder," She snapped, "If you were to smile at them like that and demand to know why the sudden urgency to get you mated, if you'd get your answer."
He unbent enough to laugh, startling himself as well as her.
"We shall dine in the gardens tonight then, and see what comes of it."
The children were not behaving. They glared, stomped their feet, and refused to have anything to do with the two newcomers. Which was just as well, because the both females seemed determined to draw him into conversation, vying for his attentions in subtle ways, but still coming off as desperate.
"Sesshoumaru-sama!" Rin called out. "Come play with us!"
'Thank the gods,' He thought mentally, not even bothering to excuse himself as he stood and walked calmly over to the children, who were embroiled in another game of monsters and heroes.
"We need a better monster than Kasai and Mizu, they won't stop laughing. Mama won't stop laughing either," The girl pouted. The laughter had not been lost on Sesshoumaru, and more than chagrined by the antics of the adults, he smiled coldly.
"I think perhaps, it is time the heroes take down the monsters," He told the girl slyly. Rin's face lit up and he darted over to Kasai and snarling loudly. The kitsune jumped in the air and took off, quickly understanding that the game had changed. The children picked up quickly enough, and soon Kagome and the twins were running roughshod through the garden, screaming as the daiyoukai chased, appearing in front of them and letting loose one of his strange, echoing barks when he did.
It did not escape his notice that the two females hoping to gain his attentions joined the game, although Shuuki, the candidate from the south, lagged behind, her heart not truly in the attempt. Shunran however, seemed determined to join, even though the children ignored her completely.
After rounding the three up to one another, the children began to circle them, trying to trip them. Feeling strangely mischievous, Sesshoumaru darted in front of the miko and barked before lunging at her, more of a pounce than anything else, and knocked her back, rolling off of her as the children took their chance to swarm over her fallen form and proclaiming her vanquished. Her laughter rang out in the gardens, clear in the warm summer air.
"Hey, how about we play a game from my tribe?" Shunran asked.
"We don't want to play with you!" Zurui groused sullenly. Shunran's face grew hot with anger.
"You little brat-" She snarled, hands clenched into fists at her side. "If I were your mother I'd-"
"But you're not," Kagome cut in, standing up. "I am. Zurui, you know better than to be unkind to others." The snake youkai muttered something that might have been an apology before disappearing behind the miko, getting lost in the sea of children now crowded behind her.
"You should teach her better manners," Shunran snipped testily. "Although as a human I don't see what business you have in raising youkai at all."
"I understand you've your own knowledge of how pack treats one another has been hindered by certain, events," Kagome suggested delicately, her tone belying the rage shimmering in her blue eyes and the insult implied. "But here pack is pack, no matter their breeding. I would thank you not to call any of my children brats. Understand that they don't trust outsiders."
"I won't be an outsider for long," The red haired cat huffed.
"Rather presumptuous," Sesshoumaru growled.
"I've heard that for the house of the moon, we only have to display our strengths in battle. The strongest is elected as the mate. I'm not in any danger from her," Shunran said with a disdainful glare over her shoulder at Shuuki. "And the honor of your clan won't let you back down once it's done."
Kagome stared in shock at the female. That was it? That was the trial? The strongest won? Fear spiraled out of control and only the small hands suddenly clasping her own stopped her from falling to her knees.
"I'm afraid that is not quite how it works," A new voice cut in, sounding anything but apologetic.
"What?" Shunran asked, looking around for the owner of the voice. Appearing from behind a tree, Yuugao stepped out, her gold eyes filled with malicious triumph.
"It does not work that way. You must either beat him, or engage him in a draw."
"That's crazy!" Shunran stuttered, quickly losing what composure she had. "I was told all we had to do was prove our abilities!"
"You do. The house of the moon accepts nothing but the strongest and smartest. It is how we have held the title for so long. Accept the terms, or begone."
Shunran looked ready to spit acid and leave then and there, but steeled herself and straightened, her eyes flashing angrily.
"Fine, I accept."
"And you, aosagibi? Do you accept?"
"I knew the terms before I was sent here. I accept," The quiet youkai sighed.
"Then both of you, leave this place, and be ready for tomorrow. Now!" She barked when neither female began to move. Shunran, still glaring angrily at the female daiyoukai, stalked off, and Kagome released a sigh of relief.
"Twins, collect the children and come with me. Shinzuru, you as well," She commanded imperiously.
"I can-" Kagome started.
"You will stay here and discuss what you shall do if one of them wins tomorrow," The woman snapped. Kagome started, feeling bereft when the hands holding her own released their hold and followed the twins inside. Soon Kagome and Sesshoumaru were left outside in the gardens, alone.
"So," Kagome started, then shrugged helplessly and walked over to the blanket. "They're not going to win," She murmured.
"Only if I let them," Sesshoumaru answered as he sat down beside her. He did not expect the sudden tang of fear flavored by sorrow to emanate from her, clouding her aura and scent.
"Would you let them?" She whispered.
"No. They are not suitable. The cat is too abrasive, and the children already despise her."
"The children despise both of them," Kagome sighed. "Although for the life of me, I don't know why. I know they're leery of strangers, but this went beyond that. Even Rin was acting coldly towards them."
"It does not matter," Sesshoumaru shrugged indifferently. "Neither will win against me, or even engage me in a draw. The cat is weak, and even though the crane is strong, she is not strong enough to subdue me." He was quiet for several minutes, staring into the quickly darkening sky before he asked the question that had been bothering him.
"Why were you afraid?"
"Afraid of what?" Kagome asked, eyes locked on the stars.
"The cat, when she spoke of the trial. You reeked of fear."
"I'm just worried about how someone like that around would affect the kids," She muttered hastily.
"Even if I could not smell the lie, it would be obvious," He rebutted. Kagome sighed and dropped her gaze to her lap.
"I guess the idea of another female coming in scares me," She admitted. Though he could tell she was holding back, he didn't press her. She was essentially acting as alpha female, despite his mother's presence. Any female coming in would demand those rights instinctively, and she would lose them. The miko had plenty to be afraid of. If he weren't strong and determined to stay unwed at least.
He threw an arm over her shoulder and was surprised when she leaned into him. Allowing himself to be content with the first relaxed, freely given contact in weeks, he turned his gaze back to the stars.
"I've missed this," Kagome sighed to herself quietly.
Sesshoumaru found he agreed, although he did so only in his thoughts.
"Hnn."
A/N: Creepy Sess smile FTW! I hope you all enjoyed, and see you next week!
