Another chapter. Second to last, I think. Enjoy! (Yes, you will probably be confused, and yes, that is partly intentional)
"We're back!" Felicity calls as she emerges from the thick forest. Ann follows closely behind, with Simon and Tom just after.
"How did it go?" I ask, detangling my fingers from Kartik's hair. He sits up quickly and all traces of crying vanish from his cheeks.
"Well," Felicity sits down in a huff. "I think we're ready to kick Circe once and for all." She smiles proudly.
"You mean…"
"Yes, we have Philon's allegiance, and the centaurs as well."
"Really?" The initial reaction is that I want to jump for joy, but something bothers me.
Ann's smile falls. "What is it, Gemma? It's what you wanted."
A frown tugs at my mouth. "I don't know. It seems…too easy."
"Maybe we're finally catching a break," she offers. She looks lovely, standing there, able to be the one offering comfort for once. She deserves to have this all the time.
"Yes, maybe everyone else is fed up with Circe too. Oh wait, they are." Felicity grins wickedly. "Though I have the feeling Gemma shall be the one to do her in."
I flush. "Perhaps not," I say.
"She killed your mother," Kartik says. He picks a blade of grass and tears it in half violently. I swear I hear the blade scream.
"She killed your brother," I retaliate. "You have just as much a right to kill her as I do."
Kartik adapts a petulant look on his face as he crosses his arms. "I shan't have you until you come back with her head on your shield," he says girlishly. Felicity explodes with laughter.
"Maybe we'll all do her in," I say pointedly.
"Yes, that's right, we'll each have a turn hacking away at her neck," Felicity jokes. This time it is Simon's turn to laugh.
"I never knew you were such a comic, Felicity," Simon says.
"You never cared to find out," she says. Someone objective would think she is flirting with him, but I know Felicity. I can hear the accusation in her voice, the hurt. She loved Simon. It somehow doesn't surprises me; I think I've known it all along.
I change the subject. "Our allies?"
"Philon and the centaurs," Felicity says.
"Asha and the Untouchables." Ann corrects herself. "I mean, the Hajin."
"The Rakshana and the Poppy Warriors," I say.
"My brother and his followers," Kartik says, touching my hand lightly. "The gorgon as well."
"Me," Simon offers. "I will fight for your cause."
"So will I," says Tom.
"Tom?!" I'm speechless. "You barely know anything about this."
He reaches forward to clasp my hands. "Let me do something worthwhile for once, Gemma. Let me help my little sister."
"But Tom…what about Father? If something should happen to me…"
Kartik jerks his head warningly. Gemma, let him help.
But I don't want him to get hurt.
You won't sway him.
How do you know?
Male pride. Let him help.
But what can he do?
Kartik is silent. Hah, I told him so. Male pride or not, Tom isn't suitable for this.
"Tom," I begin apologetically.
"Welcome to the Rakshana," Kartik blurts out. He glances sideways at me. "We shall need someone that knows medicine and healing. No doubt you're suitable for the job."
Healing was clearly not what Tom had in mind, but he seems satisfied despite it. "Thank you," he says formally.
"And then we have Kashvi," Felicity adds. "And us, of course."
Kartik exhales. "So I suppose all there is left to do is…" Somehow get everyone together and prepared for battle.
"Oh this is impossible!" I say aloud. "How am I supposed to bring in all of the Rakshana?"
Kartik looks puzzled. "You won't have to. They can assist us if we need them in our world, but here we have the forgotten brothers. The Knights of the Poppy."
"How forgetful of me," I say in an unnaturally high voice.
Ann steps forward links arms with me. "We should go back, Gemma. You're under a lot of stress."
"That doesn't even begin to cover it," I grumble, pulling my arm away. Ann rolls her eyes and instinctively looks over at Tom, who is conversing with Simon. She tosses her hair and sashays to Felicity, and I cannot help but smile. For a moment it was as if our old Pippa was shining through Ann. It makes me realize just how much we have all become a part of each other. I also realize how much I owe it to the four girls giggling away the night in a cave to make sure that we all succeed, Pippa included.
"You look pensive," Kartik says quietly as he comes up from behind me. In the presence of the others the only sign of affection he offers is a light hand on my waist.
"Mmm," I agree.
"Do you want to talk about it?"
"I'd prefer if we were alone," I say softly.
"Then let's go back," he suggests. "We can talk all evening, and if you're really stressed out…" I know tantric massage.
I look at him in surprise. No, you don't!
A wicked gleam lights his eyes. I knew it once. Now's a good time to remember.
I can't wipe the silly grin from my face. "Gather round, everyone! It's time to go back!
We slip back into our room unnoticed, in a sense. My family is for the most part oblivious; they know where I am (not specifically where, of course), but they assume Kartik's mother is also present. Kashvi knows specifically where, but she can no longer object; as the Goddess and Dignitary fully awakened, Kartik and I technically have the final say in all matters. If we wish to be alone in our bedroom, then we shall not be disturbed.
The windows have been opened wide to the outside world and the purple glow of twilight casts the room into a romantic light. No edge is perfectly discernable, giving the illusion that everything is fusing together, dreamlike and hazy.
Kartik's lips are a brand on my skin, creating personalized stamps across my neck and shoulders. His fingers claim other parts of me, skimming over my body like a beachcomber searching for treasure. For now, it is his show, his turn to explore. I am bidden to relax while he melts and remolds me, again and again.
You're unbelievably tense, Gem.
I can't help it. I'm worried.
Of what? We have wonderful allies.
I know. It's just…
Kartik places his hand between my breasts and gently pushes me back down into the pillows. An unspoken confession has me distraught, and even he does not know of it.
"What is it?" he murmurs. He strokes my cheek as if I am a precious doll. I know to him, I am.
I know I cannot keep this to myself for long. As much as I try to block it from him in my mind, there will always be an opportunity to steal his way in. I have no reasons to hide my insecurities, but I feel they just complicate matters.
"Tell me, Gem." Kartik rests his head against mine on the pillow. The warm, familiar scent of him is a reassurance, a lifeline.
"Seeing my friends today, I realized…I'm not a part of them anymore. I've come a long way since those nights in the cave. I'm not the same girl I used to be."
"And that upsets you?"
"No," I say. "I am happy with who I've turned out to be. But in growing together with you, I've left them behind."
"So that upsets you."
I think for a moment. "No," I admit. "What upsets me is that I feel like I'm not long to this world." I don't allow him a chance to comment. "I see Felicity and Ann now, and they've changed a great deal too. They've taken control of their lives and they're happy. That's all I could ever want for them. I look at my father, he's healed. Tom is finally opening his eyes to the world outside the gentry. Everyone I love is improving upon their lives, but…"
"But?"
"I'm no longer a part of it. If I were to die today, people would be sad, but they would move on. I'm not needed anymore."
My heart beats wildly in the absence of Kartik's response. His hand reaches to my waist and clutches me to him. "I need you," he says.
"And I need you," I murmur, turning my head for a kiss. Our conversation is put on hold for more pressing matters to occur.
"You're the only thing solid in my life," I say later on, as we lay on the rumpled sheets, gasping for breath. "Everything else…"
His eyes peer at me from behind a tangle of messy black hair. I push it back and place a kiss on his sweaty forehead. "And this future they're planning for us?" he asks, referring to our families.
For a moment I indulge myself with fantasizing about that future. Instead of escaping it all by choosing Kartik, we'd be thrust further into the spotlight. It'd be worse than being an ordinary society wife. He's a prince and therefore all gossip would be centered around us. There would be no privacy, no end to it.
"I don't want it," I confess.
He smiles. "Neither do I."
Our plans go unsaid between us. We agree that no one else should know of them until they are executed.
We nestle together under the plush duvet and warm sheets. Night has rolled in and the room is cast in near complete darkness.
"Are you afraid?" Kartik asks, running his thumb over my lips in a caress.
"No. Are you?"
"No."
"This is madness," I whisper.
He smiles sadly. "This will finally end it."
I sigh, finally feeling the benefits of having a lover. "Tomorrow," I say decisively. "It's better they don't see it coming, else they'd get too anxious."
Kartik's eyes are lanterns in the dark. "You still want them to be there?"
"When else will I get to say goodbye?"
We're standing on the edge of a large, gaping hole in the rocky ground. White swirls in the air around us, it could be snow and ice, or hot ash from the burning land. Either way it freezes our skin into thinking it's burning.
I lean over to look down into the gash in the earth and shudder. It must be Hell down there. Black, pulsating darkness swirls, emanating evil and death. The distant sound of endless screams reaches my ears, the result of thousands slaughtered for the sake of evil.
'This is it,' he says, the red bloom on his tunic the only color I can see. 'The source of it all.'
'Do you think you can do it?' I clasp his hands in mine, desperately feeling for his warmth.
He unsheathes his gleaming sword and hands it to me, hilt-first. The sword glows with my magic, our magic. 'We are one,' he says. 'And I know that we can do it.' I hand him his sword. He touches my amulet and kisses me. And then he jumps into the swirling black hole.
I wake with a start, my chest heaving with frantic breaths. "Kartik!" I shake him awake.
"What is it? What's the matter?" In the darkness, the whites of his eyes gleam.
The realization that it was just a dream does little to console me. I start to cry, knowing that all will end tomorrow. The intense nostalgia overwhelms me, but I can only verbalize one thing.
"Kartik, will you wait for me?" I ask, sobbing into his chest. He tightens his arms around me.
"I would never go off without you. Of course I'll wait."
"This is too much!"
"Shh," he soothes. "Gemma, think of the beauty of it. It's why we're here."
"But what if I never see you again? What of this really ends it all?"
He is silent. I know the same fear strikes through his very core. I feel him try to grasp at logic, to think of some way to reassure us both.
"There must be a place for us if we do not come back. You are the Goddess; you cannot be replaced."
"And what about you?"
Kartik shifts his weight. His skin is so warm against mine that I cannot possibly imagine that tomorrow it will grow cold. "There is no light without shadow, day without night, high without low." He faces me. "And there is no Gemma without Kartik." He grins. "Wherever you go, you can be damn sure I'll find a way to follow."
"What do you want, Emily?" Pippa folds her arms over her bloodied bodice.
"I just want to talk to you."
"Oh?" She sneers evilly, revealing her jagged teeth.
Emily shudders. "I know how you feel. Being used and such," she blurts out. "But you cannot use that as an excuse to turn against loved ones."
"You don't know anything!" Pippa screeches.
"Circe is lying to you Pippa! She's lying to us all!"
"What makes you think that?"
Emily sighs. "Unless you cross over, you'll never get to be with your friends again. Miss Worthington will not come to the Winterlands."
"But she loves me."
"And that's why she wants you to cross, Pippa."
Pippa uncrosses her arms and bows her head. A few flowers fall from her crown. "I'm tired of this," she says. "Of all of this."
"Then cross," Emily says gently. "It's not good to live your…death in spite."
"I want to," Pippa whispers. "But I can't now."
"Amar thinks you still can."
Pippa bites her lip, drawing blood. It no longer fuels her hunger. She turns to Emily. "Help me," she pleads.
"We will."
Hmm, foreshadowing much?
Sex isn't just recreational for Kartik and Gemma - it's spiritual. That's why they've now done it 4 times in two days. Or maybe they're just horny teenagers. That is also true.
The end is VERY NEAR! I must say, I hope I get to 500 reviews when I finish. That's a good, solid number I think. And considering this story drained the life out of me for oh, how many months now? June, July, August, September, now October... without many delays. I must have a good attention span. Hmm.
Okay, so what are your thoughts? Good, bad, ugly?
Ummmmm,
LunaEquus
Please review!
