Fallout
"Christmas"
By Nan00k
Christmas special! You may note the style has changed, but hey, this IS an experimental story. Happy Holidays, whatever you celebrate! :)
Chronologically, just know this happens before Halloween, as you may have noticed Thundercracker's comment about how he hates Christmas. This chapter explains why he does. Thanks as always, Shantastic!
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Disclaimer: Transformers © Hasbro/Dreamworks. The original characters in this story are mine, however.
Warnings: character death, violence, foul language, disturbing imagery
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'Twas the night before Christmas, and in a mountain of stone,
Not a creature was stirring, not even a drone.
Eleven brave figures sat by a fire,
Some quite awake, others soon to retire.
The snow outside blew harsh on the incline,
But they in the cave were safe deep inside.
Conversation was short, but quite soon enough,
Two of their members began some mischief.
"Do you know what tonight is, guys?"
Jazz asked, looking to each, meeting optic and eyes.
"What is it?" Danny asked, truly quite witless.
The silver mech grinned, and cried, "Why, it's Christmas!"
The humans all smiled, but the mechs only frowned.
"What is that?" Arcee asked, questioning alien sounds.
Barns took over and explained quite glibly,
"This is the holiday when Santa comes down chimneys!"
Wildrider sat up, not understanding the allusion.
"Who is Santa?" he asked, tilting his head in confusion.
"A cultural figure, who brings presents and toys,"
"to good little girls and to good little boys."
Barns' explanation caught the red mech's attention,
And that of the others, for much different reasons.
"Don't give him ideas," Thundercracker pled,
"The cave won't survive—nor will my head."
Wildrider demanded more answers, however,
About this "Christ-mas," which he soon thought was clever.
"So to celebrate the historical birth of God's Son,
People had feasts and gave gifts to everyone?"
"Yes," Barns replied, his face filled with pleasure.
"When I was a child I was given several treasures."
"We have no gifts to give," Danny commented sadly,
"And no time to make some," Kass added flatly.
"That's okay! Santa's got it," Jazz exclaimed with great cheer.
Rachel retorted, "If he really existed, he would have come last year."
"Don't be so negative, kiddo," he replied with a smirk.
"The world's a big place and we ain't seen all it's quirks."
"You're all insane," Vortex snapped, refusing to comply,
"To want a stranger to come to our camp? He could be a spy."
Barns laughed at his comment and Kass shook her head,
"It's only a story, 'Tex, no need to fret."
So, Barns regaled those willing to listen,
About Santa and elves and Rudolf and Blitzen.
After a long evening of chatter, they all went to sleep,
No one truly expecting tomorrow what they'd see.
They woke early when Thundercracker caused quite a ruckus,
He'd come out of recharge hearing loud chuckles.
No one else had stirred, but when the jet looked around,
He trembled with fright at the sight that he found.
A pile of packages, all strangely wrapped and neat,
Sat in the corner, right by their feet.
No stranger could have left them there, that much he knew.
Thundercracker, surprised, had no idea what to do.
Before he could speak, a great shout was heard.
All the mechs and humans jumped up as if spurred.
"Vhat is this?" No one of them knew quite what to expect,
Because in the middle of the room, Wildrider stood erect.
"I KNEW IT!" he screeched, pointing down at the objects,
"What's going on?" Rachel demanded, completely perplexed.
With great cheer, Barns and Jazz confirmed it was no mistake,
While Thundercracker sat there, wishing he was not awake.
"We've had an intruder!" Vortex cried out in anger.
"It was just Santa!" Danny said over the clamor.
"Why so upset?" Barns asked. "What harm can this do?"
The 'copter replied, "They could be dangerous—it's not safe to assume!"
As the helicopter searched for their guest,
and Arcee shut off her audios to get some more rest,
Bluestreak peered at the presents and was clearly delighted
At the sheer number of toys—there was even a kite!
It took a long time, and Wheeljack's aid,
For the chaos to subside, and breakfast to be made.
Outside, Christmas morning was as bleak as the rest,
But of those in the cave, just a few were distressed.
"This is so nice," Kass said, with a smile at her friends,
A combination of toys and clothes and other odds and ends
Splayed out about them as the youngest started to play.
"While surprising, this was a great way to start the day."
After a while, Danny poked at a package.
"I just gotta ask, how did you wrap it?"
Jazz grinned in demur, "What d'ya mean?
I had nothin' t'doo wit' it—Santa brought these!"
They all rolled their eyes; no one believed him.
"Okay, I'll admit it," he confessed with a grin,
"Santa's got helpers, a bunch o' elves, I hear."
Barnaby's grin stretched from ear to ear.
"You're crafty, you're sneaky, you're clever, I think."
Rachel said, dryly. Jazz and Barns shared a wink.
"This will end badly," Thundercracker proclaimed.
Vortex snarled and scuffled. "Never again!" he exclaimed.
Wildrider did not fully agree, peering at his new gift, a miniature car,
"How can you not like this?" he demanded. "You're so bizarre!
I'm having such fun! Let's do this again, next year!" he smiled.
The laughter that followed made the trouble worthwhile.
And so Christmas morning was spent in a cave,
Full of laughter and voices and friendship and games.
It did not take long 'til a moment preordained,
When Thundercracker was forced to scream, "NEVER AGAIN!"
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"…That was the best poem you've ever written, Rachel," Kass said, grinning as she finished reading it out loud.
Rachel put down her pencil, smirking as they watched the chaos unfold in front of them, Wildrider and Bluestreak playing with the toy cars Barns had taken from the last city they visited. "I'm just surprised they thought that far ahead," she admitted, laughing. Thundercracker was yelling at them to shut up. Vortex was still freaking out about "Santa Claus" sneaking into their cave without him noticing.
"Jazz is a planner. Always remember that," her British friend replied, glancing over at the mech, who was looking mighty pleased with himself over the mayhem he had created. Barns and Danny were sitting in a corner reading a book he had chosen specifically for her.
Wheeljack had given up on supervising and joined them by the far wall of their winter cave. "I must admit, it was a clever idea," he said, earfins flashing brightly. "I do wonder, however, if it would be prudent to have a repeat of this next year—"
Before he could even finish, more chaos erupted as Vortex took half of the gifts and blew them up. Three seconds later, both he and Wildrider were in a fistfight headed out the exit of the cave, Jazz and Thundercracker rushing after them. Bluestreak sat and looked at the crushed remains of his toy car mournfully. Arcee was staring at her arm cannons, as if contemplating suicide to escape the noise.
Wheeljack, Rachel and Kass looked at each other and then back out at their companions.
"Never again," the three agreed.
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End Christmas.
Next: The origin of TC and Jazz's relationship is explained.
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